A/N: Heyyy ya'll! Thank you so, so much for all the reviews, and thank you for your patience. Enjoy another extra long chappie D

Disclaimer: We do not own Mediator

Chapter 12

I open my eyes the next morning, feeling the late summer heat come in through the windows and the thick walls of the dorm rooms, but that's not all I feel.

My eyes widen as I see Jesse's arms wrapped around me as he sleeps beside me. Quickly, I push him away, causing him to fall off the bed. "Get the fuck away from me!" I exclaim angrily.

"Querida?" Jesse asks sleepily as he groans, slowly getting up off the floor.

He stands up and reaches out for me but I back away. "I said get AWAY!" I nearly shout, trying my hardest not to cry.

"Querida, what's the matter?" Jesse asks me slowly, trying to calm me down obviously. Doesn't he GET IT?

"I saw you!" I exclaim, his face blurring as tears fill my eyes. "I saw you with her! I saw you...kiss her."

"Susannah, I don't know what...oh," he says, finishing his sentence off almost so quietly that I can't hear him.

"You know, I really thought you were different!" I exclaim, the tears now sliding silently down my face. "I thought you were BETTER than him! But now...you're just as bad."

I storm past him and out of the bedroom and into the bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind me.

I hear footsteps that stop at the bathroom door, followed by Jesse's voice, "You have to let me explain, Susannah!"

"WHAT could there possibly be to explain, Jesse? I saw her kissing you, and I ran away. Tad saw it too!" I exclaim.

"She did kiss me, but as soon as it happened, I pushed her away!" he replies, sounding like he's trying to stay calm but not doing a very good job of it.

"Like I would believe that, Jesse," I say bitterly.

"It's true!" he exclaims, dropping his voice to nearly a whisper as he continues, "I felt absolutely horrible. I still do. Please, Susannah, you have to believe me."

"Go away, Jesse. Go be with Bex, I don't care," I simply say before reaching into the shower and turning on the water.

While I'm in the shower, I think things over and decide that after the appointment, I'm going back to Carmel. I can't deal with being here with him anymore.

I let out a long sigh as I grab the shampoo bottle opening it and putting a little bit on my hand, rubbing it through my hair as I try to also get rid of all the tension stored up inside of me.

Long after I'm out of the shower, I sit on the edge of the tub, my towel wrapped tightly around me. Jesse's given up calling for me a long time ago.

The problem is, I still see his shadow in front of the door. I'm guessing he's sitting in front of it. This won't do, because the appointment is in 3 hours, and it takes 20 minutes to get there. So I can only sulk for like 2 hours before I have to get out.

That's when a piece of paper is slid under the door and I hear retreating footsteps. Wow, I would have thought Jesse could come up with something a little cleverer than a note under the door. Not like it'll do any good.

I get up and walk over to the door, hesitating before picking it up and unfolding it slowly.

Susannah,

You're mad. I know. You have every right to be. I just want you to hear me out. So before you crumple this up and throw it in the trash, just listen. Or rather, read. Last night was a mistake. I should have seen it coming. I should have stopped it before it happened. But what I said before was true: I did stop it as soon as it happened. Tomorrow when I go back to class, I'm requesting a new lab partner. I don't want my lapse of judgment to come between us. I'm truly sorry and I love you.

Love,

Jesse

I read the letter over and over again over the next half hour before sighing and throwing it in the small waste bin.

I lean forward and rest my head on my knees, letting out a long, deep breath. When I look up again, I see Jesse's shadow by the door again.

Another note comes into the room, the only sound is the soft scraping of the paper against the tiles. By now my hair is pretty much all the way dry.

I get up and walk over to the door, once again picking up the paper and unfolding it, my hands shaking a little now.

I glance down at it, skimming over a few words before sitting back down and taking a deep breath.

Please, Susannah. I know this is hurting you as much as it is me. I love you more than anything. If I didn't, I wouldn't be trying this hard. Please come out.

I sigh and crumple this one up as well; waiting another few minutes until I see his shadow once again move away from the door. I might as well try to sneak away from the bathroom, its small.

I quietly open and close the door but as I turn around, I see Jesse sitting on the couch, staring down at his feet.

"Susannah," he says quietly and I nearly jump out of my towel, I didn't think he had seen me.

"Leave me alone, Jesse," I mumble, heading toward the bedroom but in an instant, he's at my side.

"Susannah, you can't do this. We're married, we need to talk this out," he says, gently grasping my arm.

"There's nothing to talk about Jesse! I saw you with another woman!" I exclaim, moving away from him. "Look, after the appointment today, I'm going back to Carmel."

"Querida...you can't, I mean," Jesse stutters, coming at a loss for words.

"I don't know what else to do," I reply, not wanting to meet his sad, hurt eyes. "I don't know how I can trust you...after what you did."

"Susannah...I promise you I couldn't be sorrier, I was a complete and utter bastard for what I did. I should have stopped it the moment I even suspected anything of happening, I'm sorry, but Querida, believe me when I say I love you, I love this child, I don't want to lose you, either of you," Jesse says to me, placing his hand over my stomach.

I can feel my walls crumbling at his words as I look down. "You don't know how much it hurt," I whisper.

"Susannah, I was an idiot," Jesse says to me, reaching up with his other hand and touching my chin softly.

I look up at him and he gently traces over my lips with his thumb. "These are the only lips I want to kiss," he says softly.

I sigh before turning my head away from him a little bit, closing my eyes.

He lets out a small sigh and slides his arms around my waist. "I'm sorry," he whispers, his voice a little shaky. "I'm so, so sorry."

"I'm going to go change. We need to go soon," I say softly.

"...Ok," he whispers, letting go of me and letting out a long, deep breath. "I...I'll wait for you out here."

"I'm going to be a while," I say to him, and he nods before going back to the couch and sitting down slowly before grabbing the remote.

I stand there with my hand on the doorknob just looking at him, seeing how sad he is. I don't think I've seen that look on his face since his father died.

I sigh and go into the room, shutting the door quietly behind myself. He screwed up, and now he has to pay the consequences.

"Ready?" I ask as I come out of the bedroom forty five minutes later, seeing that he hasn't moved from the couch.

"Yeah, let's go, there might be traffic," he says softly before getting up and grabbing the car keys.

We get out to the car and before he can open the door for me, I open it myself and slam it shut. He just stands there for a moment, looking shocked before going to the other side.

Deciding, once he gets in, that I don't even feel like being next to him, I then crawl into the back seat, buckling in.

He takes a deep breath before starting the car, silently starting to drive. I lean my head against the back of the seat and close my eyes.

As predicted, we get stuck in traffic. It's a good thing we left nearly an hour and a half early, because we don't' get there until about 20 minutes before my appointment is scheduled.

Sitting in the waiting room, I fidget with my hands as I feel Jesse's eyes on me. "Will you quit staring at me?" I exclaim in a whisper, glancing over at him before looking back down at my hands.

"Sorry," he says softly and then I see him looking down at his hands also, out of the corner of my eye.

I let out a deep breath and keep focusing my attention on my hands, not saying another word until my name is called. Jesse and I both stand up and I almost tell him to stay here.

I decide though, that that might be too harsh, I mean he has been there for me over the past 4 months or so...

"Are you nervous, Susannah?" he asks softly, the first thing he's really said to be since before we left.

"Not really," I reply as we're directed into a small room.

I quickly go into the bathroom and change into a hospital gown before Jesse has the chance to say anything more to me.

When I come back, the doctor is in the room and she smiles at me before instructing me to lie down.

"You must be Mr. and Mrs. de Silva," she says as I glance over at Jesse who's standing beside the bed with his eyes straight forward, though occasionally I see them flicker over to me.

"Yeah, we are," I say, before smiling politely at the doctor, who then explains some things that she's gong to have to do.

As I listen to what she's saying, I glance up at Jesse whose eyes are on me. He quickly looks away, like he's afraid he's going to upset me. Well, more than he already has. I sigh and turn away, not quite ready to forgive him.

It all goes by relatively quickly. Dr. Suarez applies some jelly to my belly, which is REALLY cold by the way, and then she pulls out the ultrasound machine.

She turns it on and I feel Jesse's hand on my shoulder. I just stare at the screen, too preoccupied to shrug him off.

I feel her moving it around on my belly until she obviously finds a heartbeat, and that's when I see it on the screen, my child.

"Oh my God," I breathe, my eyes widening. "Is...is that it?" Dr. Suarez smile a little and nods her head.

"Would you like to know the sex?" she asks me, looking a little closer at the screen.

I immediately nod my head and she looks a little closer. Turning back to us, she smiles again. "It's a girl," she tells us.

"A...a girl?" I repeat, a small smile forming on my face as tears well up in my eyes.

She nods her head before standing up. "I'll leave you two alone for a moment," she says before leaving the room.

"It's...it's your baby querida," Jesse says softly and I breathe out.

"No," I whisper, my voice choked with tears as I look back at him. "It's our baby. It's our baby girl."

I feel Jesse's arms wrap around me from behind and I smile before the tears start to come out.

I slide my arms around him and we hold each other tight. He starts to shake a little and I think he's crying too.

I turn my head slightly and see the tears falling out of his eyes as well, and this just sets off my waterworks even more.

I press a finger to his lips and whisper, "Shhh, Jesse." I start to wipe away his tears when he leans forward and hesitates for a moment before kissing me.

I smile against his lips before resting my hand on the side of his face and kissing him back.

He pulls back and I know he's about to apologize but I shake my head. "Please, just don't talk about that," I whisper.

"Okay," he says before kissing me again as the doctor comes back in, a few things in her hands.

I quickly wipe my eyes before grasping Jesse's hand in mine. He squeezes it and leans down to press a soft kiss against the top of my head.

"Here's a tape of the ultrasound, and a few pictures also, I thought you might like them," she says, smiling as she hands them to me.

"Thank you," I whisper, my voice still a little choked up from crying. I take out the pictures and show them to Jesse who has a huge grin on his face.

"Let's go schedule your next appointment, querida," he says softly to me after we're done looking.

I nod my head and stand up, quickly going to change before going out into the reception area, taking Jesse's hand in mine.

"Why don't you go out to the car, I'll finish up here," Jesse says, handing me the keys so that I can let myself in.

"Ok, but hurry up," I reply, leaning up and kissing him quickly going outside to the car.

I sigh and rest my hands on my belly, feeling the slight, slight bump formed there underneath my shirt.

A few minutes later, Jesse comes out to the car, smiling at me. "Susannah, we're having a girl," he says as if he can't believe it.

"I know," I say, giggling as he buckles himself and drives the car out of the parking lot.

He suddenly looks over at me and says, "I'm taking you out to dinner tonight."

"Oh, Jesse, you don't have to," I say quickly, but he shakes his head.

"Nope, tonight is all about you," he tells me, looking over at me as we stop at a red light. Suddenly his face becomes serious. "Look, I know you don't want to talk about it...but I'm so, so sorry."

"How about you write it all down for me, and I'll read it when I'm bored one day?" I ask, smiling.

He laughs and leans over to kiss me. "I love you, querida," he says, still laughing a little as the light turns green.

"I love you too, now drive," I say to him and he does as I say, smart boy.

Fifteen minutes later, we're back in the dorm and I call my mother as I promised I would after the appointment.

"A GIRL! Oh!!!!!" she exclaims and I hear her shouting something to Andy.

I laugh a little and nod my head, remembering then that she can't see me. "That's right, a girl," I say.

"Oh honey, that's so wonderful," Mom gushes and I hear the phone being transferred to someone else.

"Hey, kiddo, congratulations!" Andy exclaims and I smile. "Thank you, Andy, Jesse and I are really excited," I tell him.

"I am so happy for you too...I'll talk to you later, okay? i was just on my way out," he says and I say goodbye to him.

Shortly after, I hang up the phone with mom and Jesse comes into the living room, handing me a soda. "God, I thought she'd never shut up," I say laughing a little.

"So, now that we know it's a girl, we can start baby shopping," I say to Jesse, smirking.

"You know what? I'm looking forward to it," he replies, smiling down at me.

"You better be, I'm going to wear you out with all of my shopping," I say, snuggling up against him.

He wraps his arm around me, pulling me closer. "I can't wait to have this baby with you, Susannah," he tells me.

"I'm a little nervous," I admit softly as he wraps his arms around me, resting his hands on my stomach.

"I'll be with you every step of the way," he tells me. "You can count on that."

"I know I can," I say in almost a whisper, placing my hands over his.

I turn my head slightly and kiss him softly. He turns me around completely and kisses me deeper.

I smile against his lips, those lips that are so perfect, and lean against his warm body, wrapping my arms around his neck.

His hands slide under my shirt, making me shiver slightly. As his lips wander down to my neck, I let out a breathy moan, my eyes fluttering closed.

"You smell so good, querida," Jesse whispers against my skin, sending shivers all the way down my spine.

I let out a small sigh, running my hands through his hair. "I love you, Jesse," I whisper, my voice so soft I'm surprised he hears me.

"I love you too, querida," he replies, slipping the shirt off over my head and tossing it to the ground.

I do the same with his shirt, running my hands all over his chest. He places his hand on my cheek and kisses me even more passionately than before.

I let out a soft gasp of surprise as suddenly I'm in his arms and he's carrying me towards the bedroom, setting me down softly.

He positions himself above me and leans down, kissing me over and over again. "Mmm...Jesse," I moan softly as he removes my bra.

"Your skin is so soft," he mumbles against my lips as he slowly runs his hand over my shoulder.

I let out a soft moan as a shiver runs through my body. "Cold, querida?" he whispers.

"Just a little," I whisper, even though I'm not cold at all.

He runs his hands all over my skin, making me shiver even more. At on point, his hand comes into contact with my breast, making me gasp and close my eyes.

"You sure don't feel very cold, querida," he says, his voice husky.

"I...I..." I whisper, unable to form a coherent thought as he massages my breasts.

"Yes, querida?" Jesse asks, leaning down and placing a kiss on one of them.

I don't reply, just lean up and kiss him intensely, taking him by surprise. I giggle a little into the kiss and slide my arms around his neck.

"You sure like kissing tonight, don't you?" Jesse teases as I wrap a leg around his torso.

"What's so wrong with kissing?" I ask in reply, pulling back and raising my eyebrows at him.

"Absolutely nothing, querida," Jesse says after a moment.

I laugh and lean up to kiss him again. "Good," I reply.

He slips his tongue into my mouth as we kiss, making me moan deeply before I press myself even closer to him. His hands slowly start to unbutton my jeans as his lips wander to my neck.

A small whimper of pleasure escapes my lips as I feel him pull down not only my pants, but my panties as well, all in one swift motion.

I run my hands down his chest, stopping at his belt buckle which I undo with ease, quickly sliding his pants down his legs.

He reaches down and takes one of my nipples into his mouth, sucking on it lightly as he kicks his jeans off.

I let out a high, breathy moan and dig my nails into his shoulders. "Jesse," I moan, my breathing becoming ragged.

"Mmmm," he says in response as he moves to my other breast, this time his hand deciding to do some work of its own as well.

I let out a sharp gasp as his hands leave my breasts, sliding down my body until..."Oh my GOD, Jesse!" I cry.

"It's been almost a week since we've last done this," Jesse mumbles against the skin of my stomach before kissing it, and I realize he's right. Lately I've been feeling really gross, and that has kept us from getting intimate.

"Mmm...yeah, I know," I whisper breathily. I tangle my hands in his silky smooth hair, loving the way it feels beneath my fingers.

"I want to make you feel good, querida," Jesse says, placing another kiss right above, well there, and I let out a soft moan.

His lips dip a little lower and...well, let's just say it feels a whole lot more than good

"J...J...Jesssssseeeeeeeee," I say in a long moan as he pleasures me, something that he has always been very, VERY, good at doing.

I hit my release which leaves me raggedly breathing, my eyes fluttering closed. "Jesse," I exhale.

He crawls up my body, and oh my god if that isn't he hottest fucking thing in the world.

Wrapping my arms around his neck, I whisper, "Do you know what you do to me Jesse?"

"I'm pretty sure, if what you just did proves anything," he says, leaning down and capturing my lips with his. I kiss him passionately as an idea forms in my head, something that I haven't done for Jesse in a while, but now seems like the perfect time.

In an instant, we're flipped around so that I'm looking down at him, a smile on my face as I kiss down his neck and chest.

"Q...Querida," Jesse says, his voice low and thick as I reach the waistband of his boxers.

I slowly slide them off, my eyes never leaving his. Eventually his eyes close and he lets out a slew of Spanish.

"You're all ready for me, I see," I say, reaching out with my hand and taking him in my hand.

He doesn't say anything, just lets out a deep moan, his hands gripping the sheets.

"Oh really?" I say, giggling a little bit as I lean forward, only hesitating for a brief second before leaning down and wrapping my mouth around his length.

"Oh my God, querida," he moans out and I look up at him, smile a little as I see his face.

His mouth is open just slightly, his eyes closed tight as his chest rises and falls, it's almost enough to get me off again, seeing him like this.

As he comes into my mouth, I hear him whisper, "Oh God...do you have any idea what you do to me, querida?"

"Mmmm, I think I can taste it in my mouth," I say, smirking up at him.

He laughs a little and I crawl up his body, placing a soft kiss on his lips. He slips his arms around me, sliding his hands up and down my back.

"You are so beautiful, Susannah," Jesse says, gazing into my eyes.

I blush a little and laugh. "Well, let's see what you think in a few months when I'm huge and cranky," I say to him.

"I will think that you're glowing from the pregnancy, and inside that belly will be a new life, and that, Susannah, is the most beautiful thing in the world," Jesse says, cupping my cheek.

"I wish she was yours," I say almost silently, something I've been thinking about a lot lately.

"It doesn't matter," Jesse says to me softly.

"I just hope she never has to know who her real dad is," I say, letting out a soft sigh as I rest my head against his chest.

"I don't think we'll have to worry about that, querida, but for now, let's not worry about that, but instead, let's worry about something else that needs to be taken care of," Jesse suggests.

I laugh and lift my head, grinning. "Your little friend," I say, leaning forward and kissing him.

"Exactly," he growls before flipping me over and having his dirty way with me.