Okay so last chapter i spoke too soon. This will not be the birthday party chapter. It will definitely be in the next one though. Good news though. If i can get a decent amount of feedback on this chapter, i will post two more chapters by monday. I really use your reviews to help with the direction of the story. I like to get a fill for what you guys want to eead and incorporate it into what I already have drafted, and whats in my head. You don't realize how much of a help you really are. Thank you all for reading :)

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers

Bella Pov

You ever wanted something so bad you couldn't imagine not having it? I know it's silly, but for years I've felt that way about a piece of jewelry. A watch that my father owned. I'd lost it when he died, and never saw it again. A few days ago I saw this particular watch sitting in the window of a small shop near my old apartment with Rose, and almost cried. It looks like the exact replica.

Today, after the day I've had, I needed to just be close to my dad in a way that didn't make me want to break down and cry. I needed to remember our good times. I needed a reminder of how strong love, of any kind, can truly be.

I'd come by and just looked at it through the window. I've never been in the store, but I just feel content looking at the watch through the window. I felt content imagining it on my dads wrist. Imagined him smiling down at it, his little piece of heaven, his great memories. I wanted to hold on to his memories, as well as my own.

I tilt my head to the side, fully examining the thick, manly watch on display. I let memories flood my mind, and close my eyes to relive them.

The watch brings back good memories, and overshadow the sad ones of my terrible nightmares. This watch, well not this one exactly, but one just like it, adorned my fathers wrist for years. He loved that watch. He had plenty of other watches, but this one was his favorite.

I'd picked it up one day, and held it in my tiny hands, wondering what was so special about it. I wanted to know why only a few things seemed to make my father happy, and this watch was one of them.

He'd caught me trying to put the watch on, and he freaked out. He told me that Renee had given it to him. He cherished that watch because it was something the love of his life had given him. Now that I'm older, I realize, other than the gift of a baby girl, that watch was probably the last gift she'd given to him. The last gift before she'd gone crazy.

A tear falls down my face slowly, and I don't dare wipe it away. I don't cry often, but when I do, its like this. Emotionless tears.

"Bella" I hear my name being called from behind me. I don't turn away from the window to see who it is, because I already know. I know exactly who it is.

I sigh before speaking. "Are you following me" It's a lazy tone. I don't have the energy to say much to him. He is interrupting my moment, he's invading my bubble, and stepping in on my alone time.

"What are you staring at" he ignores my question. I'm in a trance as I stare at the watch, letting flash backs, and memories flood my mind.

I don't answer him. "Baby, let me take you home" I feel his hand at my waist, and I jerk away, but my eyes remain locked on the watch.

"Please go away" I beg of him. He has invaded so much of my life, so much of my time, and I just want him to go away. I was doing great without him, and now he's here, and I don't know what that means for me.

"I want to be alone" I whisper, and wait for him to walk away, but he doesn't. I still feel him behind me. He waits, and waits, and waits. God, he has the patience of a saint. How does he do it?

"Leave, please! God, haven't you done enough? Haven't you fucked my world up enough?" I just want him to go away.

Todays events have really weighed down on me, and now that I'm thinking about my father, I just want to be alone. I want to shake this hold that Edward has over me, and go back to the person I once was. A smart girl. A tough girl. Not this girl. Not this weak girl that begs a guy for a relationship, and takes his bullshit replies as simple truths. Edward's a liar, and a cheater, no matter how I look at the situation.

After talking to Jake, and having a late lunch with him, I realize now that he can not be trusted. He said so himself. He is selfish. Everything he does, and says is for his benefit only. It's to get what he wants. He doesn't care about me.

"I know everything Edward" I say, surprising myself with how soft and detached my voice is. "The woman at lunch today." I begin. "You had an affair with her. She's the reason that you and your wife are getting a divorce, right?" Jake took great pleasure in divulging this information. I'm not sure if he was pleased more so because he wants me, and was happy to see my loyalty towards Edward crumble before his eyes, or if it's just because of how much he loathes Edward.

One thing Jake didn't tell me was how he knows Edward, and why he hates him so much. The mystery of that is still unknown, and honestly, I don't think I could take anymore news after the day I've had. I didn't press him for more information other than who Heidi is, and why she may have been at lunch with Edward today.

Heidi must be married because she flashed the ring several times. I saw the ring clearly. God, this is just too much. My life was simple before him. I don't need this headache. I just wanted sex, great sex. That's all.

"Are you going to give me a chance to explain" he asks, and I scoff, and finally turn to face him.

"You have had chance, after chance, after chance" I'm tired of this. Whatever this is. I don't think it's something that I need in my life.

I start to walk away, but he reaches for me by my shirt, pulling me to him. I feel his hard body against mine, and I swear I can't breath, I can't even think. I'm intoxicated. "I told you. I need time" he says in my ear.

I shove away from him, and look him dead in his sad green eyes. "Well, you don't have time. I'm done" I try to step back, but he holds on and grips tighter on my waist, almost painfully.

"I need you, Bella. Don't do this to me" he says in that thick, deep voice, almost a plead, but I have no choice but to ignore the desperation. He's a manipulator, a master at it. I have to let go.

I yank away from him, and narrow my eyes at his hurt facial expression. I point at him, letting anger overtake me. "Why do you do that? Why? Why do you say things like that, and pretend that this is about more than just sex for you"

"Who's pretending?"

"You are! You are married! You cheated on your wife! You still see your wife, and your mistress, who is also married. You're all disgusting."

"It's not as bad as it sounds. Just let me take you home, and I'll explain everything. I will tell you anything you want to know"

"Fuck you" I grit out angrily, and with so much distaste. I don't know why I do that. Those eords only rile him up, and turn him on, which will in turn fuck me over. I need to go.

I turn to walk away, but he grabs my hand, and pulls me to him. I pull my hand away, but I'm not quick enough. He backs me up into the front window of the store that I was just looking into. He's close to me. He's so close that I can feel the heat of his body, the rise and fall of his chest, the air as he exhales angrily through his nose. I watch his jaw tick angrily, and try to focus on something other then his close proximity. I try to stop my nipples from hardening, and slow my erratic breathing, but I can't.

His eyes are dark, and full of anger. "Did you forget who you belong to, Bella? Don't ever fucking pull away from me."

The nerve of this fucking guy! I try to wiggle out of his hold, but he presses his lower half into me, pinning me against the wall. I gasp loudly when I feel his erection hard against me.

"Now, we can either fix my problem right here, right now, or you can allow me to take you home, and properly fuck you. Which will it be?" he's serious. These are actual words coming out of his mouth. I'm not imagining it.

"Go fuck yourself" I try to tell myself that he's presence, and his words aren't affecting me, but it's completely false. I am affected by everything god-like, and I have been for awhile now.

Before I know whats happening, I feel Edwards hand slip underneath my skirt, and his finger skim my lips through my panties. I hiss, and pant out, fucking frustrated with my body, and the war going on inside of me.

Then both hands are under my skirt. "I'll fuck you right here. Stop tempting me"

I stare him right in the eyes, and with all of the anger flowing inside of me, I spit out. "I won't enjoy it" another lie.

A slow smug grin spreads across his face. "You will" its a promise. A promise that I know he will fullfill. Every experience with him is pleasurable. He exudes sex in everything he does. The air around us is seemingly always sexually charged, and electric. Even when I'm not aware of him, my body is.

It's frustrating in times like these. Times when I am so unbelievably pissed at him. Still, I can't kid myself into thinking that I'm immune to him, even while pissed. I will never be immune to him. I still fucking want him. Especially when he looks like this. Like he wants to bang the hell out of me.

He breathes into the crook of my neck and I whimper, letting his breath wash over me. Goosebumps spread over my body, and I began to tingle from head to toe. I tried so so hard to ignore the painful throb between my legs, aching, amd begging for his touch. Any touch. I hate that I need him this fucking bad.

He begins to suck on my neck, and with every lash of his tongue, I grow hotter, and the ache between my legs turns into a painful throb. I find myself gripping him closer to me, and arching my neck to give him better access. This is what I like and he knows it. He knows just what to do to drive me crazy.

"Tell me that you don't want me, and I'll grant you your wish. You'll never have to see me again." He breathes out heavily, panting for air. I hesitate. "I want you to want me. I want you to be with me willingly. Say you'll be with me, and I'll explain everything. I swear it isn't how it sounds."

"Then why did you hide it from me" I'm still panting heavily, trying to control my breathing. He pulls back slightly to look down at me.

"Because I was trying to protect you from the truth. Protect you from my crazy life, and the people in it. Bella, I want you more than anything, and I feared the look you gave me minutes ago" he admits. I furrow my eyebrows in confusion, trying to remember what look I'd given him. " A look of disgust. I have a colorful past, but it's just that Bella. It's my past. I want to move forward with you. I don't deserve it, but tell me you want that."

"Yes" I speak before really thinking it over, but even as I think about it, I can't find it in me to regret my answer. I'd be lying to myself if I said I didn't still want him. I'd be denying myself what I want, what I've claimed. He is mine as far as I'm concerned. He left his wife far before he even knew me, so there's no way that I broke that marriage. It was already broken. And as far as this Heidi woman goes, I'll be getting answers from him. I want to know why he had lunch with her today, and I want to know how he knows Jacob.

X

"Where to start" he says, shrugging out of his suite jacket, and sitting on my bed across from me. It feels strange having Edwards large frame in my small studio apartment. He seems to dominate all of the surrounding space, and my body is so aware of him.

"The beginning" it's always a good place to start. I want to know everything.

He takes a deep breath, and closes his eyes.

"My family owns a very successful string of hotels and resorts, and so does Tanya's family. Our parents pushed us together for years, in hope of us one day getting married, and merging. So we did."

"You got married because it's what your family wanted for you" I ask, and he nods, but then looks away thoughtfully.

"Honestly, I wanted it too. It was a good business deal."

"But you don't love her"

"No, I don't. I respect her as a person, respect her loyalty to her family, but I don't love her."

"When did you two get married"

"When we were twenty-one." he says, and I can't help but think of how young that is to ve forced into marriage. I can't even see myself married at twenty three.

"So you've been married for eight years, and didn't fall in love"

"No." he says quickly.

"How is that" I'm curious. I've heard of people growing to love someone over years, as well as growing out of love.

He laughs a mocking laugh, and grasp my hand in both of his, kissing my knuckles with his eyes closed. When his lips leave my hand, his eyes snap to mine and they're smoldering.

"I've known her for almost twenty years. We don't have that kind of relationship" he explains as if it's something that I should just know. "It was a great arrangement. It has brought our families a generous living, and we've expanded exponentially."

"Okay, so why are you two getting a divorce?" she called him Sweetie. There has to still be something there between them.

"We separated six months ago, because I was tired of the front we put on for the world, for our family, and friends. She was trying to change my mind, she wants to go to counseling, but there is no way to fix this."

"You said you two are civil. How is that when you want two different things"

"She broke my trust, and she knows that she messed up. We have an agreement, and she knows if she doesn't play by my rules, she gets nothing" he looks down, then back up at me. "I care about her. How could I not? But I can't be with her. Not anymore. Not after meeting you. I was willing to go to counseling with her, before I met you. But not after this" he motions between us. "I have felt more for you in these few weeks, than I've felt for her in all my years of knowing her."

"You were going to go to counseling with her" I ask him softly.

"Yes. I met with her that night to tell her that I refuse to go to counseling with her. She uh-" he shakes his head looking away from me deep in thought. "She did not take that well"

"Wow. So she still had hope for you two"

"She thinks that I care more about appearances than being happy. I can't live like that anymore. I want to be happy. I want to be happy with you"

"So who were you having lunch with? Heidi?" I ask, and watch as his eyes darken, his jaw ticks angrily, and his nostrils flare.

"Who-who-uh-" he stutters angrily, blinking his eyes at me, and folding his arms across his chest. "How, uh-how do you know about Heidi" he looks down and away from me, giving me his ear as if it's the only way that he can hear me properly.

I blink up at him, "I had lunch with Jacob today" my uncharacteristically small voice is back.

I know saying this will get a reaction out of him, but somehow, I underestimated just how angry he'd get at the mention of Jacobs name. It's as if Jacobs name was a trigger word for him. His head snapped up so quickly, it was as if I'd slapped him across the face. His eyes murderous, and wide, I physically flinch at the sight of him. His face is contorted in a mixture of anger, and disgust.

"I told you not to speak to him" Edward's voice has a dangerous edge to it, then he grips at his hair, tugging roughly.

I swallow past the lump in my throat. Why do I all of a sudden feel guilty for seeing Jacob? I feel like I disappointed Edward, like I let him down.

I scramble for the right words to say to make his anger pass, but I can't think of anything. His dark eyes look so detached, hard and lifeless, cold, and deadly. I've never seen this look.

"Fuck" he jumps out of my bed quickly, and begins to pace the small floor before me. "I fucking told you" he thrusts and angry finger towards me. "God damn it Bella"

"I wanted to know more about you."

"You could've asked me" he roars loudly and I flinch away from the harsh tone.

"I am not a child, Edward. You can't just tell me who I can't talk-"

"You are mine" He growls at me, stepping back over to the bed. He leans down, planting his fist on either side of me, getting at eye level with me. "You are fucking mine. He wants to take you away from me"

"Why? Why does he want that? Why does he hate you?" I ask him.

He exhales loudly, and moves away from me, showing his absolute displeasure with the turn of this conversation.

"It's not important, Bella" he palms his face, scrubbing downward in his usual way of showing his frustration.

"Tell me"

"It doesn't fucking matter! I don't want you talking to him"

"Why" I shout. He is withholding information, and he told me that he would tell me everything. "Why does he hate you so much"

"Because his wife left him for me"

"Why would she do that" I whisper, but I know that he can hear me.

He sits up, and turns his back to me, placing his hand to his temple. "Fuck" he mutters, then drops his hand, and his head. He turns back to me quickly. "I was a bastard, Bella. I was so fucking selfish, and greedy." he drops his head again in defeat. When he looks back up at me, his eyes are sad, and remorseful. "But not anymore. Give me a chance to redeem myself"

Does Edward deserve redemption? Please review.:)