This chapter was actually really fun to write. As much as I love writing lovey & mushy scenes for J&T, these confused skinny-love scenes were great too!

Sorry if the Gemma-Jax scenes sound a little weird! Gemma never really parents and disciplines Jax on the show, so it was a little weird writing a scene where he is scolded and grounded.

And I love badass Tara! Standing up for her man!

This is a long chapter, hope you enjoy!

Leave reviews and comments if you wish, let me know what you think!


I had been on a cleaning frenzy. I needed to concentrate on something other than the chief of police seeing me naked, in a creek, with Jackson Teller. I needed to focus on something other than being arrested. I needed to thinking about something other than my future career as a doctor was now tarnished. I needed to focus on something other than crying out of frustration.

Luckily, since Gemma bailed me out of jail, my father still had no idea about the arrest and the charges.

I shuddered when I started to wonder what my father would do to me if he found out about my arrest.

Ever since the arrest two days ago, I've been making sure to lock my door. If Stephen, my father, somehow found out about the arrest while drinking, I actually think I may die. Being arrested for underage drinking, public indecency, and being drunk in public, would most definitely ruin his image for the perfect daughter.

But what I feared most, was not my alcoholic abusive father, no, it was somehow losing Jackson over this arrest.

I was furious with him. At first I blamed him what happened to us.

I couldn't believe he would let me skinny dip and get intimate with him in a public place, and drink. I was furious that he didn't protect me. I was upset that because of him, I was arrested.

I thought like that during my time in the slammer, but once I arrived home. My thinking shifted.

I was an independent woman. I made my own choices. Jax would never pressure me to do anything I didn't want to do. Sex was the perfect example, he is the one who wanted to wait. He wanted to protect me from violence, from the evil.

It was my idea to get drunk. It was my idea to run away from our problems for one night. It was my idea to go swimming, while drunk. It was my idea to go skinny dipping, in public, while drunk. I was the one who teased him with my body. And I let him finger me.

Jax was not to blame; I was.

I think I was so mad at him after being arrested, because I was lying to myself. I was to blame for this whole mess, and I didn't want to believe that.

I was letting my guard down, and I was upset at myself for letting a boy influence me so much.

I had no right to be mad at Jax. I should be on my hands and knees thanking him for convincing Gemma to bail me out of jail.

I needed to thank the Morrow's for being so kind to me.


Two days earlier

I was so worried about her. She wasn't like this. She wasn't supposed to be like this. She was supposed to be influencing me, to be a better person. I wasn't supposed to be influencing her to break the law. This was all my fault.

As I sat alone in my jail cell, all I could think about was what I was going to say when she broke up with me.

This was the longest relationship I ever had, hell this was the most meaningful relationship I shared with anyone. No one mattered to me as much as she did. Sorry Gemma and Opie. I didn't want her to leave. I didn't want to say goodbye.

But I knew it was coming.

What girl would stay with their boyfriend who was to blame for their arrest?

I put my head in hands and began to cry.

The best thing that had ever happened to me was walking away and there was nothing I could do. I was locked up; it's not the first time and I know it won't be the last.

I could hear Gemma saying now, "If she can't handle a simple arrest like public intoxication, she won't be able to handle the long jail time. She's not Old Lady material, Jax. Better to get rid of her now, baby."

God, I hated when she was right.

I knew I needed to save her, just one last time. "Unser! Unser! Unser!" I continued to scream.

When the old man finally walked down to my cell, I convinced him to call Gemma on the wall phone for me.

"Mom, it me, Jax. Look, I know you're pissed at me and you have every right to be. I know I should've showed up at dinner, I know I should've called. I know I shouldn't have gotten drunk. I wasn't thinking. I messed up, I know. But, Tara, she doesn't belong in here. This isn't who she is. She doesn't have anyone to bail her out, mom. If her dad finds out about this, he's gonna kill her. You know that. Please, please for me, get her out of here before he finds out. Please mom, this one time, I need to look past my bullshit and help her."

"You keep messing up Jackson, and you're not going to have anyone to save." Gemma said.

I moved slightly so I was now laying on my back, trying to fall asleep; but she haunted my dreams. Her laugh, her smile, her kiss; she was haunting me, and we haven't been officially broken up yet.

I must've been asleep for hours, because when Unser finally came to unlock my cell, the sun was beginning to set.

"Wake up, Teller. Your mom's here."

"Perfect." I murmured. As much as I wanted out of this fucking cell, the last person I wanted to talk to was Gemma. I needed to see Tara.

I needed to convince her that I was sorry, that I loved her, that I didn't plan any of this. I needed to convince her to stay with me.

I ducked my head down as I did the walk of shame to the police station lobby, avoiding stares from Gemma.

"Thanks Unser, I got it from here." I heard her say.

The walk to her car was silent, and I was hoping the ride home would be too. But Gemma couldn't possibly keep her mouth shut that long.

She turned the corner, so we were officially out of ear shot of the police when she finally began yelling.

"How fucking dare you disrespect me like this? I throw a family dinner, and you decide to skip it, then you don't call. Do know how freaked out I was? And then when we called Unser, he didn't even believe us at first because we had to explain that you do this sort of thing all the time! And then the prospects find you three fingers deep in pussy! What the hell is wrong with you? Do you even think before doing something?"

"Where is she? Where is Tara?" I said, not even acknowledging the wrath Gemma was giving me.

"Of course, I just bail you out of jail and the first thing you think of is pussy, typical."

"Will you stop referring to my girlfriend as just 'pussy' just once? I love her, mom! We both know she isn't just some slut hanging around me for my patch. Now, where the hell is she? Did you leave her in there? We have to go back! Turn around!" He yelled, scaring Gemma.

"Jackson Teller, you need to calm down. You keep yelling at me and I'll make sure you never see her again."

He took a breath, "Where the hell is she? I need to talk to her."

"She's at her house. I bailed her out early this morning. You're welcome, by the way."

"Wait, you bailed her out, but not me?"

"No, I bailed you both out at the same time. Clay and I agreed you will work to pay us back for the bail money."

"Whatever, I don't care about the money, I care about her. Drive me to her house, I need – wait, you let me sit in jail all day, for what? Because you were pissed at me for skipping your precious dinner? What the fuck?" He began to yell.

"I let Unser keep you in there because you need to remember who you're speaking to. You may not like my choices, you may not like Clay, but you will respect me, you will respect him as your stepfather and as your President, and keep your hateful opinions to your self. I'm tired of it! I'm marrying Clay, get used to it. Stop bitching about it and deal with it.

You need to remember that I am your mother, and you will not speak to me this way. I don't know why you're being so rebellious lately, and why you feel you can speak to me this way, but it needs to end. Maybe it's because of that little bitch that is your girlfriend, but the disrespect ends now. You will show up for work everyday, without complaint, and your pay will be used to pay me back for your bail. You will not skip school, you will not go out. Understood?"

"Yeah." I said as I clenched my sift, trying to hide my anger.

I couldn't even look at her. How was she putting her love for a man before her son? Her only family left was being thrown under the bus. I was furious. I know I've been a dick lately to her, but for her to put Clay first… Mother of the Year.

I couldn't even look at her.

I needed to get out of this car. I needed a smoke, and a drink. All this anger was building up, and I needed to let it out before I punched someone. I needed to get out this car.

I really wanted to see Tara.

A few minutes alter, while we were driving in silence, we passed Tara's street, and my heart burst. She was probably sitting at home, thinking of the easiest way to let me down and break my heart.

I was so angry at myself for putting her in this position. If I wasn't such an emotional bitch, I could've prevented all of this.

"Turn around." I said, "Turn around now, I need to see her."

"I don't think that's a good idea, Jackson. You didn't see her earlier. She was so upset and confused. I think you need to give her some space."

"I need to talk to her. I need to know we're okay. I'm so confused, mom."

"I'm sure she's just as confused you. You both need space. You can talk at school."

I didn't know what to think. I was so mad at Gemma for marrying Clay, but I needed to talk to her so badly. I needed advice, I needed to know what to say to Tara. I needed to vent, and I sure as hell couldn't tell my best friend all of my girly feelings. Tara is who I tell everything to, and now that I can't talk to her, I might just combust. I was so lost without her, and I hadn't even lost her yet.

I just nodded, to let Gemma know that I agreed.

It was probably better to talk to Tara when I knew what I was going to say. I can picture myself saying the wrong thing, and ruining whatever small chance I still have. I needed something grand to apologize with, to show how sorry I am, to show her how much I love her, how much she means to me.


Monday, yesterday

I wanted to talk to her so badly, I didn't want her to think I was avoiding her. But, Opie was right.

After I got home yesterday, Opie came over and talked everything through with me. Convinced me that Gemma was right. And when I apologized, I needed to have a plan. I needed to know what to say.

He also said that he would have Donna talk to Tara, so they knew how she was feeling. And Donna would let her know that I was grounded, the reason for the silence and for not calling.

"I know you love her, brother, and I know she loves you too. But this is serious shit that you're dealing with. Listen to me, I know she's good for you, but are you good for her?"

Those words Opie spoke have been branded into my mind since our conversation yesterday.

I had to stop thinking about myself, and start thinking about her, what was best for her. She wanted to be a doctor, and most of all she wanted to get out of Charming. She wanted to be successful and be a part of something bigger, to help people.

Me being around, could harm that dream. It was already obvious how bad I was for. We have only been dating for four months, and I had already gotten her arrested. How was she going to go to college and be a doctor with a record? I was poisoning her.

"Tara's smart, real smart, everyone knows that. She's a good girl, she's meant for great things. She's not supposed to be sitting in jail cells and in the back of cop cars. She's the person that's supposed to get out of Charming. She doesn't belong with outlaws, Jax."

I know Opie wanted us together, but he had a point. A good girl like Tara, doesn't belong with a hopeful outlaw biker like me. She was meant to be in a big city, saving lives.

Because I still needed more time to think, I had Opie and Donna pick up Tara for school today. I was still so conflicted on what to do, I couldn't see her just yet.


We hadn't talked since we were intimate at the creek, and I had no idea where Jax and I stood.

Hell, I didn't even know if he would be picking me up for school today.

I couldn't tell if he was avoiding me, or in trouble, or if maybe Gemma left him at the police station for another night.

I just wanted to talk to him, and hug and kiss him. Whenever I'm feeling my lowest, I could always count on him to hug me so tight, as if he was trying to put me back together.

One day, someone is going to hug you so tight that all of your broken pieces will stick back together.

Jackson was that someone. He was that person that could make me feel as if my world wasn't crashing down. He was the person who calm me down, and make me relax. Whenever I was having a break down and upset, he would hug me so tight, that I could almost feel his love for me, overcoming me. I needed one of his hugs right now, and I hate that this situation is coming between us.

All of my anger had gone away, I was more upset at the fact that we got caught by SAMCRO prospects than anything at all. Creepy, strange men that I'd had never talked to, were staring at me, naked, with Jax, and then laughing about it. What kind of adult does that to a seventeen year old girl? I was creeped out.

I knew this would pass over. I knew my grades were outweigh this arrest on my college apps.

I knew that this minor incident wouldn't hold me back from accomplishing my dreams.

So, when Opie pulled into my driveway this morning, I was a little surprised.

I thought Jax would want to rush over and see me, and talk everything over. I figured Gemma would make him go to school now, as part as a punishment, and that we we would spend the day together.

On the way to school, in Opie's truck, I began to wonder, Is he mad at me? Is he mad at me for suggesting the idea of drinking and going to the creek? Is he mad at me for going skinny dipping? Is he blaming me? Is that why Jax is avoiding me?

Now I had so many questions, I needed to see my Jax.

The last thing I expected, were for people to know about the arrest. Since I was still a minor, I knew they couldn't release my name. I thought I was safe from public judgement, but I was so wrong.

I hopped down from Opie's truck and immediately felt all the stares from the other students. They weren't even trying to hide it; they were talking about me, and not even trying to whisper.

"Did you hear about Jax and Tara having sex in the creek? They were caught by Chief Unser. What a slut!"

"Such a hypocrite. She said that we needed higher standards than Jax, and here she is having sex with him. What a bitch!"

"I wonder if she's pregnant? Jax would definitely break up with her then, I should give him my number. Jax doesn't want a baby, he'll be single any day now."

"She thinks she's so much better than us, being all smart and shit, but at least we're not having drunk sex in public and getting arrested."

I had never been so embarrassed in my life. Sure, getting drunk was a mistake. We weren't even having sex, yet the whole school thinks I'm a slut. I loved Jax, and I don't regret any second I've spent with him.

I'm not embarrassed of him and our relationship, but I am embarrassed that now the whole school knows our sex life.

He should be here, comforting me, protecting me from this, and yet I can't even find him.

Now I'm pissed at you Jackson Teller.

"C'mon Tara, I got you. Let's go." Opie said, holding my head into his chest, attempting to hide me from the rude stares and comments from our peers. Donna was walking right next to us, carrying my school bag.

I could feel the water begin to fill my eyes. God, I was so angry at Jax for not being here to protect me from this, and to hold me. It should be Jax comforting me right now, not his best friend.

I wanted to cry, but I refuse to show weakness. Me having a breakdown is just what they want, to see me broken. I refuse to let them know that they got to me.

"Where is he, Opie? Where is he?" I asked, my voice cracking in the middle of my sentence.

"I don't know, Tara. He asked me last night to pick you up for school, that's all he said. We can skip if you want, you don't need to be here today."

"No, what I need is to be in school, to focus on my work. I need Jax here."

Neither of them responded, I could see their pity on their faces. Instead of talking, Donna grabbed my arm and led me into homeroom. I was glad for her silence, the last thing I wanted to do was talk and vent at school.

Homeroom passed, and Jax was still a no-show. I was so focused on where he was that I couldn't focus on my work. I was such a wreck, I just needed him to hold me.

He finally walked into class during Mrs. Hanson's biology lecture, disturbing the whole class.

When I first saw him, I lost my breath. I fought every urge to run up to him, and hug him. I craved his embrace.

At a time like this, we should be helping each other, not avoiding each other. As a couple, we are a team, and avoiding each other ruins that ideology.

I expected Jax to come sit next to me, but when I looked at him, he compteley avoided me and began to walk in other direction. As he sat down next some random girl, I was so confused. After everything that has happened, why doesn't he want to talk to me? Is he that mad? I was on the verge of crying, I needed Jax's comfort not his cold shoulder. I was more confused than ever. Shouldn't I be the one avoiding him? Shouldn't I be the one mad at him for getting me arrested? I wasn't mad anymore about actually getting arrested, now I mad and hurt for the way he's been treating me since the arrest.

Then the worst thought came across my mind, does he want to break up?

Luckily, my assigned seat was in the back of the classroom and no one would see my crying fiasco.

"Hey, cheer up Tara at least he hasn't cheated on you yet." One girl said to me.

"Yeah, you should check for STD's, no one really knows where he's been."

"Now that you guys are done, do you think you could give him my number? He's so hot!"

"Shut up Kelly, she's obviously upset! And besides he wouldn't go for you."

That was it, I was lost it. I couldn't take the rude comments, the insensitivity, the drama, the ignorance anymore. My emotions got the best of me.

"Yeah, shut up Kelly before you get hurt." I said.

I stood up to walk out of the room, before I actually hurt anyone. The last thing I needed was to get suspended for fighting. But, how could girls be so rude and mean? It was obvious that I was upset and crying. Did that Kelly girl really ask me to give Jax her number? Was she stupid?

"Are you mad that Jax is finally treating you like the rest of us? How does it feel to be treated like dirt, like you're just another slut to hook up with? He's probably only with you for sex. Lord knows he would never be with you for anything else." She yelled, her words now being heard by everyone, including Jax, who stood up.

Before I could ever give it a second thought, my clenched fist was hitting the girl's jaw.

"Bitch." I said, spitting on her purposely.

I then ran out of room, leaving my stuff on my desk.

Not even bothering to look at Jax, who had no idea what I was going through without him.


I ran out after, wanting to console and congratulate her for that crazy punch but she was no where to be found.

How did she learn to punch like that? I haven't even had a chance to teach her how to fight yet.

Disturbing the class again, I walked back in to grab Tara's bag; I knew she wouldn't be coming back today.

"Ah, Mr. Teller care to join us for class today and not cause a distraction?"

"Sorry teach, gotta go." I said, before winking at her and running out the door.

I walked up to the office, only to find that Tara wasn't there. I stopped by the gym, bathroom, locker rooms, parking lot and I still couldn't find her anywhere.

Why wouldn't she tell me that people were harassing her? Did people really think I was only with her because of sex? Did people think I was incapable of loving someone?

I was tired of avoiding her, I wanted to hold her. But more importantly, I wanted to hurt all the immature bitches who were bullying her about the arrest. How did people even know? And did all these sluts really think I would leave Tara for them? That would be like trading in a classic 1960 Harley for a child's tricycle. Why would I ever choose those sluts over Tara? I shook my head at the stupid thought.

I needed to find her. After all we've been through in the past 48 hours, I needed her more than ever.

If she wasn't planning on breaking up with me then, she sure as hell is going to now.

Not caring about anything else, I walked right into Opie's class, history, interrupted the lesson and pulled him out of class, along with Donna.

"I can't find her anywhere. I need to find her, where is she?" I mumbled.

"What happened?" Donna asked, worriedly.

"We were in biology, and all of a sudden Tara started crying and some stupid girls started talking to her saying stupid shit about me cheating oh her, me having STD's. And then another bitch said that I was only with her for sex, and then Tara just punched her in the face. I've never been so proud." Jax said, as a smile came across his face. "But she ran off, and now I can't find her. I've checked everywhere."

"Damn, go Tara." Opie started to say, "Uh, we'll split up. Donna will check all of the girls' bathrooms, and you and I will walk around oustide. Don't worry, Jax."

He nodded, walking off.

The boys walked around the campus, for what felt like hours, searching for Tara. Jax was having a breakdown about every fifteen minutes. He was so worried about her, their relationship, and her reputation. And even with all of this, he had yet to make up his mind about their relationship.

Right now, he wanted her more than anything. He loved her so much, and would never be the same if he lost her. But, Opie was right. Tara had never fought anyone before, and now she was throwing punches in the middle of class. Of course he was to blame, they were talking about him when the punch was thrown. She was arrested, because of me.

The last thing he wanted was to ruin her life. She had so many hopes and dreams, and Jax didn't want to be the one to take those away. More than anything, he wanted to see her happy; whether that was with or without him.

After seeing a poster for students to return old textbooks to the library, Jax had a light bulb moment. "I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier, dude she's in the library!"

He started jogging, trying to get to Tara as fast as possible. After turning a few corners, he finally found himself in front of the library doors. Bursting them open, he ran to the back, knowing Tara likes to quietly study in the back. Starting chaos by shouting her name, he finally found her, crouched behind a bookshelf, crying into her hands.

"Tara! Tara!" He ran over to her, as if this was the last time he would ever see her.

"I've been looking everywhere for you. God, I'm so sorry! This is all my fault, I'm so sorry! Tara, please forgive me, I'm so sorry!"

He was sitting across from her now on the floor. He moved her hands away from her face, and began to wipe away those tears. "Hey, no more crying. You threw a hell of a punch, don't cry. It's okay."

He hated seeing her crying, it nearly broke his heart into a million pieces. But most of all, he hated knowing he was the reason for her tears.

She finally looked up, and stared right into his eyes. He could see the pain in her eyes, and he hated himself for it. "Tara, I am so sorry. I love you."

And right then, he cupped her face and planted his lips on hers. He needed her more than she would ever know.

Suddenly, her hands were running and tugging on strands of his hair just like she knows he likes, turning him on.

"God, Tara, I'm so sorry. I love you so much."