AN: Okey dokey guys:) It's time for the party. Now basically I have written a one-shot that describes what happens at the party so you should go on my profile and check it out before you read the end of the chapter (I have put a warning as to where it should be read in the chapter)
Also mentions of self-harm in this chapter:/
Tuesday 9th March-
Mara's diary:
Jerome is coming home today! I've missed him so much. I mean obviously I've seen him at the hospital but it'll be different seeing him back at Anubis House with all his friends. It's been really difficult keeping this party hush hush though. Alfie almost blabbed to him.. Twice! But, he didn't and neither did I so we've managed to keep it a secret.
I hope Jerome enjoys the party, we've all put in a lot of effort. Trudy baked a chocolate cake (Jerome's favourite flavour) and together Alfie and I iced 'welcome back Jerome' on the cake. It's a little but wobbly but I'm sure he'll like it. Amber, Particia and Eddide hung some balloons up around the house and even Nina and Fabian helped. I feel a lot closer to them now that I helped them get the mask. I feel like they trust me. It's nice feeling.
The biggest surprise was Joy. After everything we put her through she still wanted to help. She made a massive card for Jerome with a portrait of him on the front. It's really well drawn, I never knew Joy was an artist. But the two of us are closer now and we've resolved our differences. I really understand how she feels. She left and then when she came back everything was gone. Now she's making an effort to be nice to us. I almost forgot how much I like the real Joy. The Joy that supports you and you can have a laugh with. I've missed her. But I'm glad she's back now.
Mick didn't help at all, but then, I never expected him too. Him and Jerome were never particularly close. But that doesn't matter because Jerome is coming home today.
~ A little bit later~
I'm in Biology now and I wish that school would hurry up and finish so I can get home and see Jerome. Trudy's picking him up from the hospital in... 2 hours. We have half an hour left of school which leaves us an hour and a half to make sure everything is sorted.
~1 hour later~
Everything is set up and ready. We've all got our 'party clothes' on. I'm wearing a blue knee length dress that Jerome once complimented with a short white cardigan. Amber did my make-up and I'm pretty sure that I look nice. Which is good. Ooh, is that the door.
They're back early diary. I've got to go!
~After the party~ (GO READ HOUSE OF PARTIES NOW BEFORE YOU READ ANY FURTHER)
Oh my gosh diary.. Jerome just kissed me on the cheek! Does that mean he likes me? Oh I'm so confused but happy. I can't stop smiling. The party was a big success diary. Everything went to plan. Well, except Mick showing up and causing tension. I wonder what Joy was going to tell us. I'll have to find out later.
But Jerome Clarke kissed ME! Me, Mara Jaffray. It's like a dream come true. I mean, it might have been a friendly thing, it was just a cheek kiss. But a cheek kiss is better than no kiss isn't it diary.
I can't sit still, I just keep pacing around and moving. Oh Patricia and Joy are back, I have to tell them what happened. Night diary.
Jerome's journal:
Did I just do that? Did I really just kiss Mara Jaffray? It may have only been on the cheek but it was better than nothing. She didn't pull away or look disgusted which I have to take to be a good sign. And earlier when Mick was saying about us going out and Mara's response was "What would be so bad if I was going out with Jerome?"
So she didn't say an outright no. That really gets my hopes up. Maybe Mara would go out with me. I really hope so.
That party was really nice. I don't think anybody has ever treated me so.. Nicely. I mean, after my mother left me here to rot when I was five I have just become accustomed to being second. To never really being worthy of anything. I never got the best grades, I never did well in after school clubs, I was never any good at sports. The only thing I'm good at is lying and scheming, which fits considering that my father is in prison. I don't think I've ever been that much of a good friend. God, I'm so pathetic.
Those were the last words my mum said to me before she left me at this boarding school, "God Jerome stop snivelling. Stop being so pathetic." Then she flung open the car door and left me here. That's why I'm comfortable with being alone, because for six years I was the only one living in Anubis house except for Trudy and Victor. So alone is natural for me.
Sometimes I just need to escape. I love all my housemates dearly, well except for the meathead, but sometimes I need to be alone. I need to let out and the stress and just be free. That's why I self-harm. It's because it's the only way to relieve the stress, the burden of my past that hangs on my shoulders. And when I'm carving these lines into my skin it's all gone, I'm just Jerome. I'm not Jerome the Jokester or Jerome the schemer or Jerome the mean, cold, harsh, unforgiving boy. I'm just me. I wish I could stop but I don't know how to get to that state without bringing a blade to my pale skin.
I don't want to self-harm. I mean who does, you don't ask for the sort of thing. It just... Happens. But I'm just so rotten inside that it was always going to happen to me.
Rotten and Pathetic. That's me. Oh and don't forget worthless Jerome. You're that as well. Why was I even born? Is this all there is to life. Getting better just to get worse.
Pathetic. Worthless. Rotten. PatheticWorthlessRotten
~Later~
Ow. God I went too deep that time. That one will definitely scar.
Oh what is wrong with me? My friends just threw me a party, I kissed the girl that I love and I'm here self harming. I really am Stupid and Pathetic. My mother was right, I am pathetic.
