Title: We Need to Talk
Summary: The four most dreaded words in a relationship.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own /scorpion. This story is for entertainment purposes only. I make no profit and no infringement of copyrights is intended.
Chapter 12
Something was bothering Paige. It didn't take a…
Inwardly, Walter chuckled. How many times in the past few months had he been made aware of the literal truth of those words; 'It doesn't take a genius'? Throughout his life, nearly everything that he wanted was within his easy grasp because he was a genius. Lately he found himself almost wishing he had a normal brain – almost. Because he so often felt that what he really needed to successfully navigate the quagmire of love was to not be a genius.
Walter sighed. He had no desire to have himself lobotomized. He was a genius and he would have to find his way however he could. Why did Toby and Happy seem to have none of these problems?
He wasn't even sure how to open a conversation. Everything he read advised open communication. 'Talk to your partner' was stressed repeatedly. But how to begin the talk? His eyebrows shot up suddenly as a recent memory surfaced.
"Paige, um… I think we… we need to talk."
"Hmmm?" came the distracted response.
Walter frowned. Paige was not following the protocol she herself described. 'They want the other person's undivided attention' had been her exact words. Walter estimated he had less than five percent of Paige's attention right now. Perhaps it was his protracted delivery of the key phrase that failed.
"I said, we need to talk." He emphasized the last four words.
Paige looked up from the plate full of food that she'd been staring at. "Oh… um… Is something bothering you?"
"I was going to ask you that. You seem… distracted. Is something upsetting you? Have I done something? Is there something I haven't done?"
Paige reached a hand across the table and wrapped it around Walter's. "Walter… slow down. I'm not upset with you."
"But you are upset about something?"
She drew her hand back and picked up her cup. Walter was well aware that the coffee was cold. Paige never drank cold coffee. But he waited patiently while she took a sip and made a face. When she was about to get up, he stood and took the cup himself. "I'll get you a fresh cup. You tell me what's going on. That is if… if you feel like it."
He walked to the sink and poured out the contents of the cup. He was nearly finished pouring another when Paige finally began to speak.
"I'm not… I'm not really sure that I should. Not yet."
"So then," Walter urged as he set the hot coffee in front of her. "I assume that means that whatever it is, it isn't about… about us?"
Paige spent a moment blowing across the surface of the hot liquid, concentrating her gaze on the ripples. She took a sip, then put the cup down, wrapping her hands around its warmth. "It… it sort of is… or maybe not. That's why I'm not sure if I should say anything."
Walter took a breath and began to count. One thing he had learned is that he couldn't expect the sort of immediate, unqualified response that he got from a computer. He thought back on some of the things Doctor Rizzuto said about communication. Leaning back in his seat, he took his hands out of his pockets and carefully set his arms in an open, inviting position, laying his hands open on the table with his palms facing up.
"Walter, are you planning to meditate?"
"What? I… I don't understand." Walter struggled to keep his arms and hands relaxed. This was not going well. Perhaps he should suggest they sing; build some harmony?
"With your arms stretched out like that, you look like you're about to chant a mantra or something."
Walter looked at his outstretched hands, then brought his arms in and let them dangle into his lap. "It's… it's body language. I'm trying to show that I'm open and sharing."
Paige smiled. "Walter, you really don't have to try so hard."
"On the contrary, I do."
Paige lay her own arm across the table and beckoned with her fingers. Walter cautiously brought a hand up and lay it in hers. Of all the things that surprised him recently, this was perhaps the biggest surprise. Touch – something he avoided from all others - was something he found comforting with Paige. Despite his many blunders, a simple touch of their hands always made him feel that everything would be fine.
"Walter, we both have to try. We both have to work at this. You've… you've hit upon something that I need to work on. I… tend to be a little bit of a… a worrier. I see problems where they may not exist, and that makes me… broody."
She lightly stroked his palm with her thumb, which somehow made Walter realize that it was now over twenty-four hours on their free weekend since they last made love. He knew that statistically men were supposed to think of sex several times a day. That was yet another thing he used to think he was immune to.
"I've spent a lot of the past eleven years not talking about anything that bothered me… for Ralph, you know? I need to remember that… even if you don't always pick up on it… sometimes, you obviously do. It's not fair to let you worry, not knowing… soooo…"
Paige got up and walked to the desk where her tablet was sitting. After tapping the screen a few times, she brought it over to the table and sat down, clutching the tablet to her chest.
"I'm probably making something out of nothing, and I really don't want you to feel like… like this is anything more than an over-worried mom's… illusion. I got an e-mail from Ralph yesterday…"
Walter sat listening while Paige talked about the e-mail from Ralph. He chuckled at the poison ivy story, and wondered himself why a game played in a swimming pool was named after a travelling merchant from the thirteenth century. When Paige finished, he understood.
"Paige, it's hardly surprising that you're upset. I find it hard to believe that you imagine this might be anything other than a serious problem."
"Walter… it may not be that bad. We just need to give Ralph some time to work things out."
"Ralph?" Walter raised an eyebrow. "Ralph is quite mechanically gifted, but he shouldn't be spending his summer camp time repairing machinery that is at the very least not his responsibility. If necessary, we'll go to the camp offices and demand they get that water pump fixed immediately."
"Water pump? I'm not worried about the pump, Walter." Paige paused. "Well, that is, I am, of course. But…" Paige's shoulders slumped and she sighed. "I really am making something out of nothing, aren't I?"
"The pump problem certainly isn't nothing if it sends scalding water to the showers; but I think you need to tell me what is bothering you, if that's not it. Are you concerned about Ralph playing tricks on the counselors?"
"No. I'm concerned that Ralph… that he's not as happy… about us as we… as I thought he was. He didn't mention you in the e-mail at all, Walter. Not once. Not even a 'say hi to Walter'. Nothing. He knows you're spending the two weeks here and I can't help but wonder if that's bothering him. Maybe he thinks it's too soon or maybe… maybe he's… jealous?"
Walter stood, shoving his hands back in his pockets. He truly hadn't noticed what Paige pointed out. That didn't mean he wasn't concerned about it now that he was aware. He turned and stared out the small window over the kitchen sink at nothing. Doctor Rizzuto would tell him he was being closed off, and he supposed he was. Before the wedding, before Lake Tahoe, in the rare moments when he imagined a relationship with Paige, this was his biggest fear. He'd told Happy he was afraid of ruining his friendship with Paige. That was true. He still had concerns about that. But his biggest fear was that it would affect his relationship with Ralph. It already had. Ralph forgave him for firing Paige, but Walter wondered if the boy truly trusted him as he once had.
"Walter? Are you all right?"
Walter whirled. He was suddenly aware of just the sort of damage his instinctive reaction to emotional turmoil could do. By hiding his feelings, he was doing to Paige what she had been doing to him. He'd made her worry, with no clear idea of what she was worrying about. He hadn't liked the feeling, and he was sure she didn't either.
"I'm sorry. I'm… I'm okay. I just don't want anything to come between Ralph and I. Not even us. But I don't want Ralph to come between you and I, either. It's a… an infinite loop; the sort of problem that would cause a computer to crash, and I have no idea what to do about it."
Paige walked up and placed a hand on his cheek. He leaned into the touch, needing it.
"I think the only thing we can do is wait until Ralph gets home. And then we'll have to talk with him. We should find out if there is a problem before we try to solve it."
July 26, 2017
