Two days later, Frodo was in a hospital, and he had finally woken up. We all went inside, and Dakota looked very happy about something.

"Why are you so happy?" We asked her.

"I found Legolas's diary!" She said.

"DON'T YOU DARE READ THAT OUTLOUD!" Legolas yelled at her.

"Day one: my hair is getting so messed up. It's getting hard to fix it, and we're traveling by night.

Day thirty five: We reached Hollin. Frodo is sooooooo annoying, always going on and on about the ring. The world isn't about Frodo, it's all about ME! Don't people realize that?

Day seventy: I am so angry at the wimpy fellowship. They can't climb a stupid mountain, just because of a few ice boulders thrown down by the mountain its self.

Day seventy two: we are in Moria. The stupid Dwarf overreacted when we found his family's grave. Idiot. Then I faced a balrog, and Gandalf fell. Finally, no old guy leading the way. I'M the most experienced one in the fellowship, not Gandalf."

Gandalf glared at Legolas. "I was there for your birth. I am by far more experienced than you. And you were happy when I DIED?"

"Stop reading!" Legolas yelled.

"Day seventy four: We have reached Lorien. I should cut off Galadriel's hair. It's much better than mine. Maybe I could get a hair curler..?

Day seventy five: Galadriel found out that I wanted to cut off her hair and threatened to give me a beard like Gimli's. I nearly died. After all, the third most Dangerous thing to an elf is ugliness."

"My beard is a masterpiece! I should give YOU a beard just for saying that." Gimli said.

"PLEASE, NO!" Legolas wailed. "STOP, DAKOTA, STOP!"

"The two missing girls showed up. I almost killed myself, but then I remembered that I was too perfect to die.

Day seventy nine: Boromir got shot by a couple of arrows. I was hoping he would die-"

"Excuse me?" Boromir asked.

"But he didn't, and the hobbits got taken by orcs. We went to chase them.

Day eighty one: the hobbits were dead to us for maybe three hours, until we found out that they went into Fanghorn. Gimli was stupid once again, and I was sweaty- what a nightmare. Aragorn found his inner drama queen, and we realized Gandalf was alive. We saved Theóden from Saruman.

Day eighty two: I HAVE A BLACK EYE! DAMN IT! AND IT AND MY VOICE WAS USED TO KILL AN ARMY- AN ARMY- OF ORCS!

Day eighty three: We are going to Isengard to see Saruman. Based on what Gandalf has said, Saruman should be locked in a dungeon and nobody should ever have to see him again. I mean, really? Bad teeth and hair, a super long beard, and smelly? If he was an elf we would probably kill him.

Day eighty four: Just lost a drinking game to Gimli. How the hell did THAT happen? I can't even get drunk! Pippin disturbed the Palantir, so now we have to wait are around for Gandalf to send a signal by fire. That guy's a Pyromaniac, I'm telling you.

By the way, diary, I-"

Dakota paused in her reading. "Did you seriously just write that, Legolas?"

All of the blood had gone from Legolas's face. "Don't you dare read that." He said quietly.

"What is it?" Frodo asked.

"Nothing that concerns you." Legolas replied in the same tone of voice.

Dakota opened her mouth to read more, and Legolas shouted, "NO! NO! DON'T READ IT!" And lunged for the book. It went flying and Beth caught it.

"Oh, Legolas, you should have kept your diary more secret if you were going to write this in it." Beth said.

"What does it say?" Aragorn asked.

"Legolas has a cr-"

"NOYOUCANNOTDOTHISTOME!" Legolas screamed.

"Give one of us the Diary to read." Gandalf suggested.

"I'll read it." Merry volunteered.

Beth handed Merry the diary. Boromir gagged Legolas.

"By the way, Diary, I have a crush on Boromir!"

"What?" Boromir asked

"I'm just kidding. It's Dakota. Merry explained. Legolas passed out. Then he woke up almost immediately.

"Day eighty six: We have finally Gotten the signal from Gondor. Now we will ride on stinky horses for the next week to reach Minas Tirith. I know for a fact that Minas Tirith will be a terrible place. After all, it's a city made of STONE.

Day eighty eight: I have gone through the Paths of the Dead and survived. Ra threatened me to go. There was a huge spider there, the size of a coin. I ran away from it, and for some reason everyone got mad at me for it.

Day one hundred: we have reached the battle that we had to reach. It's on Plennor fields, but the grass is all dead. I took down an oliphant, and Gimli got mad at me. Then he killed a hundred orcs in one minute, and I had to admit that that was more impressive than taking down an oliphant.

Day one hundred and three- we had a council to discuss what to do. I managed to trick Merry, Aragorn, and GANDALF! He's supposed to be super wise, but I TRICKED HIM! HAHAHAHAHA!

Day one hundred and four: we took down Sauron, and we rescued Frodo! Great, more people to steal the attention away from me. We didn't celebrate, and when Frodo wakes up, we're going to get to talk to him.

Day one hundred and Six: Frodo has woken up."

"That's it." Merry finished.

"You thought Minas Tirith would be a bad city?" Boromir interrogated.

"You actually admitted I was better than you?" Gimli asked, and then passed out.

"Well, my coronation will be in a week. That way, Arwen will be here, Frodo will be better, and we'll all just get to enjoy it." Aragorn said.

"You said Arwen will be there." Dakota countered. "Not even you will enjoy it."

"Oh, well." Aragorn snapped. "Now we have to prepare for the coronation."