Mixed feelings about the last chapter apparently, but it's not going to stop me from moving forward. It's safe to assume that by this point this fic is not going to be everyone's cup of tea, and that's perfectly fine.


Just one day before the final assault on the Black Hole factory in Yellow Comet, Ryu was contemplating what role he would play in it.

Not officially of course. Officially he was still off-duty. Mentally questionable, and therefore not allowed to participate in battle. But Ryu didn't care about any of that. He was going to be there. The time had come to play his game once again.

And why not? He was convinced of one thing for certain: Sonja hated him. And she had every right to. He had forced himself on her after she had done so much for him, tried to take advantage of her kindness to fuel his own lustful fantasies. Every time Ryu thought about pinning her against that tree he wanted to get run over by a tank. Maybe hold onto a grenade and blow himself into a bloody mess. Looking back he couldn't believe he had been so cruel to her after the kindness she had shown him.

But that dark side still whispered to him. Hadn't she asked for it? Who did she think she was, ruining his life and killing his friends, only to tempt him further with something he could never have? How could she have the gall to do all of that? She thought she could screw with him because he couldn't touch her? He'd proved otherwise, what did he have to regret?

Besides, who did she think she was to lead him on and then tell him no? Because he was a soldier? Because he was scarred? He deserved better than that. He deserved to have her if he wanted her.

Every time such a thought occurred to Ryu he tried to tell himself it was delusion, but as much as he wanted that to be true he knew what his own thoughts were. And more than that, he knew they weren't going anywhere. He was too far gone now, and no matter how he sliced it, the still sane part of him said that Sonja deserved better.

Ryu knew for a fact that his darkness was there to stay, and he didn't need to go near Sonja again. He didn't deserve to. But as he had told her himself, he needed something to keep him rooted. Something to keep him going. And without Sonja all he had was his game.

He was above fruitless suicide, even if he had ruined everything good he had going for him. While he had little to live for at this point having lost all of his friends and pushing away the one woman that had cared something for him, he would at least not take the coward's way out.

After all, if he were going to do that, why bother with something so plebian? Tomorrow was the day of the assault on the Black Hole factory. What better place to play the final round of his game? The hardest difficulty, in which death would have every opportunity to claim him at every turn? It was perfect. And at least this way Ryu could contribute to Yellow Comet one last time, maybe by gunning down just a few Black Hole goons before he was riddled with holes himself.

Yes, it was a blaze of glory type of death. And the only problem with it was determining how Ryu would get there. Of course, it honestly wouldn't be that hard. The Yellow Comet force that would deploy at the factory would be massive, taking troops from every major division and placing them under the Emperor's command.

Would anyone notice just one more soldier? Just one more rifle on the field of battle? Of course not. Everyone would be far too busy fighting for their lives and following orders to notice that there was one soldier extra.

All Ryu would need to do was move inconspicuously with the convoy of troops that would leave from Sonja's battalion tomorrow. And that would be easy enough, as it was no easy feat to distinguish anyone in particular in the sea of yellow uniforms and steel.

For once not laying on his cot, Ryu gazed out over the base as troops went over their final preparations for the short march tomorrow. Tanks were being loaded with ammunition and fuel, recon jeeps were receiving thirty caliber rounds, and even a few transport choppers were getting the fuel they would need.

Sonja's battalion honestly wasn't full of heavy duty war machines. The majority of aircraft belonged to Sensei's unit, and the frontline juggernauts like Medium Tanks and the newly produced Neotanks went primarily to the Emperor. Sonja's battalion was almost entirely support, with mostly light vehicles, transports, and long range bombardment units, along with a sizable amount of infantry of course.

It was likely that Sonja would be providing the most recon and artillery units to the field of battle, and those units would remain under her command, while the few tanks and infantry would go under the Emperor's. That meant the latter would be pushing the frontline and Ryu would get the most amount of action, and more of his roulette.

He briefly imagined a very irate dark haired girl berating him for relapsing back into his addiction after she had tried so hard to provide him with an alternative, but with enough effort Ryu managed to shrug it off and send it away. He didn't want to see her face right now, especially with their last encounter taken into consideration.

Would she even care? When or if his name eventually turned up in an after action report, would she lament his passing? Ryu felt like the answer was no. How could she care after what he had almost done to her? Had she not come to her senses, who knew to what extent he would have gone? How far he would have taken her purity?

It was that thought of the possible outcome of his actions that drove him to dance with death once again. He knew Sonja despised him, all of his friends were dead… and he'd rather his mother believe he had died honorably on the field of battle. That way he'd never have to return to her and hide the sins he had committed against an innocent girl and the Emperor's daughter.

Yes, this would all work out just fine…


At the break of dawn the next morning, Sonja watched as the convoy of her troops began their march towards the peninsula where Black Hole had dug their fetid claws into Yellow Comet. Dozens of vehicles, flanked by hundreds of soldiers, began the short yet nerve wracking journey to Kanbei's forward command post, where the final preparations would be made before launching their assault on the factory.

Sonja had foregone any inspirational speeches, certain that she could leave that particular job to her father. She would be coordinating the troops that remained under her command, the artillery and recon units, from here at her own command post.

She was nervous about the assault that would take place later this day, but only on a moral level. Truth be told she was optimistic about the tactical outcome of the battle. With the combined forces of Orange Star, Blue Moon, and Yellow Comet, it was practically guaranteed that allied forces would be able to win.

Not through sheer numbers of course. Sonja had already done the math, and the Black Hole factory could crank out more troops than their foes, and much faster as well. In fact, if the battle dragged on for too long Black Hole would sweep the allies away with little trouble.

But Sonja had already formulated a simple yet efficient plan to win the day. All they had to do was destroy the pipe that supplied the factory's production. With Orange Star forces stationed on the west isle, their bombers would have an almost straight shot to the vulnerable pipe seam that needed to be destroyed. All they'd have to do is eliminate one or possibly two of the mini cannons on the center isle, then strike hard and fast enough to punch through the enemy line and destroy the target in one shot.

Meanwhile, Yellow Comet forces would keep the bulk of the enemy forces occupied on the southern approach. It was perfect for Kanbei and his valiant troops. Blue Moon would provide funding and raw materials for the battle itself.

It would be a fierce conflict, but one that Sonja was confident they could win. And for that reason, from a logical standpoint, she was not overly concerned.

That thankfully left her with enough emotional room to worry about the next most important thing. And that was Ryu.

Just thinking about him filled Sonja with a maelstrom of varying emotions. She didn't know what to feel about him right now. Just the other day he had taken far too many liberties with her. Certainly, she had never expected her first kiss to go the way it had, without invitation or with someone she didn't share any type of romantic relationship with.

That thought made Sonja angry, but at the same time she could not say she hadn't enjoyed the experience. Physically, at any rate. Emotionally, she had been frightened the moment she had managed to come back to her senses.

Sonja was good enough at reading people to usually tell what they were thinking on the surface. And when Ryu had her pressed against that tree, she could tell where his mind was wandering. Dark places. Places of no return. Places that would include her losing a lot more than her modesty.

She hated to admit that there was any positive feeling for such a situation at all, but Sonja was not the kind of person to lie to herself. There was something… instinctual in her, that craved his touch. Sonja figured that it was less of a sense of love and more of lust. Everyone desired that physical fulfillment at some point, and Sonja had apparently reached that stage of her life. It had only been a matter of time.

But her primal desires and her practical nature were arrayed against each other completely. She'd readily admit that physically, she had wanted Ryu in that moment. The urge to let him fulfill his needs in her had been overwhelming, potent to an extent that scared her more reasonable side. Being someone that had always followed logic and reason, to be swayed by passion and instinct scared her greatly.

And it was that logical and reasonable side that still reigned supreme in her mind and actions. There were so many reasons why she had to stop this while she still could. Why she had to establish some sort of boundary and have the nerve to hold to it.

Naturally the first of those reasons revolved around the practical aspect of their respective positions. Sonja was an officer in the military of course, but above that she was the Emperor's daughter. For her to have romantic relations with a mere enlisted soldier and civilian would be the absolute scandal of the decade, or maybe two. It would bring total shame and dishonor on both her and her family, and Ryu would almost certainly suffer an execution as recompense for his actions.

Beyond that, there was his own emotional health to worry about. It was obvious to Sonja that Ryu needed serious help. He was not in the right state of mind. First his mad obsession with risking his life on the battlefield, and now a lack of restraint in pursuing her. It was obvious to her that psychologically, Ryu just didn't care for restraint any longer. He gave into his instincts without much thought, or if he did try to resist he didn't have the willpower to do it for long.

Or perhaps it was histrionic personality disorder. An absolute desire for excitement, for a rush, for the fulfillment of one's desires. But Sonja could not imagine what had possibly created this disorder in his mind. Looking back on his record, he had been a model soldier before the mission that had killed his tank crew and scarred him.

Was it the incident itself that had done this to him? Had the rush of cheating death instilled a craving for more in him? Observing his crazy games on the field of battle, it certainly seemed that way. But then again, the fervency with which he had come onto Sonja couldn't be explained away with that. Perhaps the incident had simply instilled a desire to give in to his desires more openly. Perhaps the realization of his own fragility in life had prompted him to make the most of his time and simply live for pleasure?

Either way, Sonja found it difficult to be mad at him for his actions. Even if he had very nearly taken advantage of her and done something awful. Because this was well and truly her fault. Not just in the sense that she had put him through the near death experience that day, but because she had made a series of bad decisions since then.

She never should have allowed him to return to the battlefield after the incident before receiving a psychiatric workout. Moreover, she shouldn't have tried to get personal with him. Sure, she had felt responsible for what had happened to him, but she shouldn't have tried to deal with him herself. It just opened too many doors to dangerous things.

Finally, she hadn't responded accordingly to his obvious infatuation with her. She wasn't totally dense. From the moment he had made it clear he thought her attractive, she should have told him that it was inappropriate and to never bring up such a thing again.

But instead she had allowed him to go even further. Had allowed him to flirt with her, and she had even flirted back. She had acted as a teenage girl with a young man instead of an officer with their subordinate. For someone that was not mentally stable, it was practically inviting him to indulge. It was her fault that he had been unable to restrain himself.

It felt so wrong to think of it that way. She had just wanted to right her wrongs. To show someone that she had wronged that she did care about him, that he wasn't just a grunt on a chess board. But she should have known better… she was a young woman providing a gentle and reassuring shoulder to someone that was reeling from a tragic loss. She had practically painted a huge affectionate target on her back, having provided him with the only person to connect to after all of his other friends had died.

The truth was that Sonja had not considered this possibility before trying to rectify her mistakes. She had never really considered herself as very attractive in personality or appearance, so she hadn't thought that Ryu would grow to feel anything romantic for her, yet now he had possibly formed some sort of dependency on her because she had allowed it to happen.

He had just been so… desperate. That day when she had pulled him off of the field, he had made it so clear that he needed something to hold onto, something to keep him sane after what had happened. He had wanted it to be her. And she should have said no. But she hadn't, and now they were here, with everything going wrong and a relationship that Sonja had no idea how to handle appropriately at this point.

Kanbei's daughter sighed in frustration as she tried to focus on the battle at hand today instead of her convoluted personal relationships. This was the greatest series of mistakes she had made in a very long time.


Hours later, Ryu hoisted an Army issued combat rifle as he gazed out at the soon to be battlefield of the northern Yellow Comet shores. A large, hideous Black Hole super structure marred the otherwise beautiful coastline.

Ryu had chosen a light tank as his perch for the view, having felt some sort of nostalgic desire to be atop one once again. It looked just like Sakura in every conceivable way, but only on the surface. A closer inspection revealed the differences in Ryu's old home away from home and this particular vehicle. It didn't have that deep groove from the tank round that had bounced off the front armor on their first mission. The turret didn't have the long scratch mark from the time Ryu had messed up while trying to unjam it in the middle of a shootout. It didn't have all of the little things that had made Sakura, well… Sakura.

He almost had enough time to sink into some nostalgic memory, but Ryu was broken out of his trance when the actual tank commander got onto him for standing on top of his tank. Ryu said nothing to that, simply choosing to get off of the tank and check his gear one last time.

To anyone that was paying attention, he looked incredibly conspicuous. Adorned in a tanker's helmet and vest but carrying the loadout of a foot soldier, anyone could have seen that there was something amiss with his whole ensemble. The Joker card in his goggle strap was pretty suspicious too.

But everyone was in such a rush getting ready. The first handful of infantry squads were already getting ready to move out and secure a forward assault base to deploy closer to the frontline. Ryu wouldn't be able to deploy with them of course, because he really would be noticeable then. No, he had to wait until the battle really ignited before he could slip into it unnoticed.

That said, Ryu didn't deploy with the first wave. But it wasn't long before more troops received orders to move forward, and Ryu wasted no time in falling in behind a light tank with another squad of infantry. One soldier in the rear gave him a quizzical glance, but didn't bother questioning him.

It was only a few minutes before the sounds of combat made themselves known to his ears. Truth be told it didn't sound like anything serious. A handful of thumps from a few tanks firing, the sputtering of AA guns, likely at a squad of Black Hole infantry, and some small arms fire going both ways. But the battle had just started and Ryu was certain that it would escalate soon enough.

By the time the tank Ryu was following reached the line of battle (roughly situated between a port to the north and a base to the south) most of the initial fighting was over, as Kanbei's vanguard had decimated their Black Hole counterparts.

The sergeant of the infantry squad shouted orders to his men as they reached a slight ridge in the earth ahead of them.

"Dig in here! Our orders our to hold Black Hole forces until Orange Star bombers can destroy the pipeline!"

Ryu wondered if this plan of attack was Sonja's idea as he crouched down behind the mound of dirt as well. It seemed fairly reasonable since she did all the plan making in the Yellow Comet command chain.

Either way, Ryu noted that most of the Yellow Comet forces were digging in around him, with even the tanks taking up positions to his left and right where the hilly terrain could provide them with some amount of protection.

It wasn't long before more Black Hole troops swarmed past the mountains they were facing, and a cacophony of gunfire immediately exploded from the Yellow Comet Line. Ryu lent the staccato of his assault rifle to the barrage, firing more or less accurately at targets he knew he could kill. He left the tanks and AA guns rolling into view to his armored vehicle buddies, which were firing at a decent rate at enemy armor. Several mech squads lent their bazookas to that cause.

Of course, this time Ryu was actually present to be on the receiving end of a fusillade as well. A storm of bullets and explosive shells came in his rough general direction, but none of them were actually aimed at him. That was no surprise though. Besides being a very small target, there were tanks and other much more dangerous things to shoot at than a few guys with machine guns.

It kind of disappointed Ryu, because there was little excitement in the situation like this, but the reality of the scenario was still made clear when a Yellow Comet tank a dozen meters away exploded when an armor piercing round penetrated its ammo rack.

The blast deafened the sounds of Ryu's rifle for a few moments, but his sense of hearing recovered just in time to resound in his skull as he watched one of his bullets bite into the torso of an enemy.

More Yellow Comet forces rolled up from the forward operating base, reinforcing the line as even more Black Hole troops poured into firing range. Said Black Hole forces quickly found themselves bombarded by long range artillery fire as well, but they didn't seem to really care about that as they stepped onto the field of battle to assault the Yellow Comet line.

For a few extra minutes, Ryu still felt relatively safe on this field of conflict. Then the head of the soldier next to him exploded in a spray of blood and bone, and Ryu felt that thrill of the fight that he had come here for in the first place. He just barely had the wits about him to feel bad about the guy that had just died next to him.

The casualties in this next exchange were far more even than the first combat. More Yellow Comet tanks were blasted to shrapnel, and more yellow clad bodies marred the dirt and grass with their blood. But they gave much better than they got, downing battle copters and dirtying the once pristine coastline with black metal and gore.

Once the coast was relatively clear again, orders came through to move forward. Supposedly Black Hole had established a forward deployment base as well just a bit into the mountains, and even though the initial plan had just been to hold their position until Orange Star could strike, someone had decided it would be a good idea to take that base if possible.

The infantry squad Ryu was shadowing decided against following a tank this time as they moved forward across the somewhat open plains between them and their new goal. This proved to be a good idea as long range fire smashed into an advancing AA unit from an enemy battleship in the waters to the north. The rest of the salvo blasted up piles of dirt and occasional body parts or shrapnel, but thankfully that same battleship exploded in a ball of fire and twisted metal soon after. Ryu assumed that came from a submarine somewhere.

With armored units mostly leading the charge, they took the brunt of the enemy's defense, but even so the infantry following the vehicles into battle weren't safe. Another of the squad's troopers had chunks blown out of him by a strafing battle copter before it was shot out of the sky by an AA gun. Yet another had a piece of shrapnel from an exploding tank slice through his thigh and just barely fail to take the limb clean off.

The squad as a whole had no choice but to leave those men behind, trusting in the combat medics that were on the field elsewhere to save them if they lived at all.

The remaining squad members took cover in the trees that were still standing after the motorized units had rolled through the forest in front of the enemy base, trusting in the sturdy towers of nature to guard them from small arms fire at the least.

It did a well enough job of that, allowing Ryu to peek out from behind his tree to eye the base they were attempting to capture. The tanks that had reached firing distance first were quite busy dealing with the heavy enemy presence around the base, which left storming the structure itself to the infantry. Unfortunately, Black Hole had shut the gates to the facility and they had to be blasted open.

With the vehicular units having an all out firefight with Black Hole armor, they didn't dare waste any ammunition or time blasting the heavy steel gate out of the way, so that left the rather dangerous option of destroying it with a bazooka.

Unfortunately the bazooka wasn't an especially accurate weapon, and getting within firing range meant stepping into the open, where the Black Hole soldiers on the walls of the base could fire on them. Ryu watched how effective this tactic was firsthand when a mech trooper leveled his weapon at the gate only to get shredded before he could pull the trigger.

Glancing around, Ryu noted that no one seemed especially eager to take the soldier's place, and naturally the thought occurred to him to do so. After all, who better to take the risk? Ryu had insane luck, and he had yet to really challenge his nemesis during the battle today. What better way to make that challenge than to place himself immediately in harm's way as always?

Smirking maniacally to himself, Ryu didn't even bother asking someone to cover him, instead just sprinting into the open and trusting in the rifles of his allies. Surely it played some role in his game, after all.

Naturally bullets started flying around him as he made a mad dash for the bazooka on the bloodied soil next to that soldier, but the only wound he took was a graze on his thigh when one got a little too close.

He made it all the way to the bazooka, hefted the weapon on his shoulder, and fired a rocket into the gate without dying or even getting hit. He managed to drop it and turn on his heel in the exact same way.

Absurd luck, as usual. But roughly two thirds back to the tree line, Ryu got a feeling he couldn't really distinguish in his gut. He wasn't sure what it was. It wasn't something he could directly describe. He felt as though he had played his hand wrong in a game of cards.

Turning to face the base again, maybe in some vain attempt to shoot whoever was about to shoot him before they could, Ryu had only raised his weapon halfway to firing position before he felt a trio of impacts across his torso. The first smashed into his stomach, keeling him over for just a moment before the next two hits crashed into his right side and then his left, somewhere pretty high on his chest.

Ryu saw a spurt of blood fly into his line of vision just before the scorching pain flashed across his body. It was a surreal experience, being shot in the chest. Though it could have been because he had honestly not expected to get shot even being as brazen as he was. Luck had proven to be primarily in his favor lately, and though he knew it was presumptuous of him, for some reason he had expected to win this round.

The crazed gambler felt his body falling backwards, but he didn't really feel the impact of his body on the ground beneath him. No deck of cards to save him this time. Maybe he should have stuffed a pack into each pocket of his vest? Even to him though, that would have been a little crazy.

As his blood stained the blades of grass beneath him, Ryu almost smiled to himself. Not out of happiness of course, but just from the irony of the situation. This is what he had wanted. What he told himself he had wanted, to die in a blaze of glory in some mad attempt to cheat death on the field of battle.

And yet, now that he was going to die, he wished he had never come here. Not because he was going to die in particular, but because had had the sudden realization that he would not be seeing Sonja again. Ever. After all, he doubted a horrible person like him was going anywhere nice in the afterlife, and he was sure that Sonja one day would.

It was strange that she had grown so important to him that her presence was the only thing he wished for as the life drained out of him, but Ryu supposed that was what obsession was like. And thinking back on what his obsession had almost made him do, Ryu told himself that this was what he deserved, even as the world went dark around him.


So, consider this your fair warning everyone; within the next one or two chapters, there will be lemons. Maybe limes first. One way or another, things are gonna get sexual, and the graphic level of those scenes is yet to be determined. Considering that this is more or less a psychological twisted romance story, chances are detail will be pretty in depth. Please note that sex in this story will not exist for the sake of mere sex, and that anything that is written in such a light is designed to go deeper into the obviously twisted and unhealthy relationship between the main characters.