"Alright", the doctor said. "We're almost there. One last push." The doctor looked up to her, his brown eyes meeting hers. "Are you ready?"
She felt a firm hand on her shoulder, while another hand stayed firmly in hers. "Come on", Sylvie said, squeezing her shoulder tightly. "We're nearly there. You can do it." Kitty looked away from the doctor, completely dressed in his hospital uniform which contained the colour white. She met the chocolate brown eyes of her daughter, who was looking at her with the encouragement she needed to push one more time.
"Come on", her daughter said again, repeating her first words.
She tightened her grip on Sylvie's hand and said apologetic: "Sorry that I'm squeezing the life out of your hand."
Sylvie smiled softly. "It doesn't matter", she said. "It's for a good cause, right?"
Kitty simply nodded, having no energy to produce words anymore. "Ok, Katherine. One more push." She nodded at the doctor as well, telling him she was ready for the final straw. This would be the fourth time she was giving birth to a child, although every time it was different. The first time, when she gave birth to Sylvie, she was surrounded by strangers. She had no-one there for her, encouraging her like Sylvie was doing right now. The other two times Tom had held her hand through the entire birth, encouraging her where he could. Never in the world did she think it would be Sylvie there with her, holding her hand.
"Alright, you can push now." This was it. It was the final straw. Yes, she could do this. She was going to do this the right way. She squeezed the hand of Sylvie very tight while she pushed with all the power she could find. She closed her eyes, trying desperately to find the energy to push.
She breathed in and out, trying to control her breathing. She opened her eyes when she heard the one thing she wanted to her ever since this process started. The crying of the baby. She saw the doctor giving the small creature that just came out of her to the nurse, who carefully wrapped it in a cloth. The nurse smiled at her and said, while handing the baby over to her: "Congratulations, Mrs. Gillan. It's a girl."
Slowly Kitty felt the baby slip in her arms. The baby was still crying, but it wasn't so loud and frequent anymore. "Hello, little one", Kitty said while she kissed the baby's head softly. "It's mummy." She slowly felt a tear running down her cheek. Only this time the tear wasn't shed because of heartbreak, hurt or devastation. It was being shed because she was happy. She had everything she ever wished for or dreamed about.
She kissed the baby again, only this time she kissed it's cheeks. "It's mummy," she whispered, repeating the words she just spoke. In the corner of her eyes she saw Sylvie looking at the scene before her in awe. "You want to hold her?"
"No", Sylvie said, while shaking her head repeatedly. "No I can't, really." The panic took over her oldest child. The same panic that found her when she first felt the indescribable pain in her stomach. "I might drop her."
Kitty smiled. "Sylvie, if you hold her like I do now, nothing is going to happen." She held up the baby, so Sylvie could see how she was holding her newborn baby. "One arm supporting the head, the other under the legs."
"Nothing can happen. I promise." When she uttered those last words, the words of a real promise within, Sylvie's facial expression changed. The panic that had found her for a brief moment disappeared and the confident woman she had become finally reached the surface, like it had always been hidden for the past year. The confident woman she was supposed to be, but never let herself dare to be.
Kitty handed the baby over to Sylvie. Her daughter carefully let the baby rest in her arms, one supporting the head, the other under the small legs. The chocolate eyes Kitty had been familiar with, the eyes that would show her no emotion hidden under the surface, slowly changed. It was like Sylvie finally let her guard down. The walls were finally crumbling down. The same walls she had once build, only to be torn down by Thomas Gillan.
"Oh my God, she's perfect", Sylvie said. Her eyes could be deceiving her, but did she see the eyes of her daughter become watery? "Hello sweetheart", her daughter said, her voice trembling, which was caused by the emotions. The emotions slowly drifted to the surface, staying afloat so that she could finally see them. "It's your big sister Sylvie."
Kitty smiled at the scene before her. It was something she thought she would never see. After Elliot had forbade her to see Sylvie ever again, she always wondered what it would be like for Sylvie to hold a younger brother or sister in her arms. She always pictured it to be like that. Sylvie would be smiling at the baby, holding on to it for dear life. She never thought it would come true. She gave up hope after years had gone by and letters returned to sender, unopened.
"She's beautiful, isn't she?" Sylvie asked, the tears now streaming down her face.
Kitty put a hand on Sylvie's knee. "You both are."
Sylvie wanted to respond, but a friendly smiling nurse interrupted. "Shall I take the baby? I will bathe and dress her, before I'll come back. I promise." Sylvie handed the baby to the nurse, who had bright red her, the hair colour reminded her much of that of Rosalie's, while her eyes possessed the colour green. The nurse sent them a reassuring smile before she disappeared in the hallway.
Kitty's eyes never left the presence of her daughter. Sylvie whipped the tears of her face, but his act was useless, because a fresh load arrived only seconds after. Kitty's hand still rested on her daughter's knee. "You are still my little monkey. You always will be."
"I love you, mom." She said while she started to cry. Kitty sat up and opened her arms, finally inviting her daughter in for a hug. Sylvie didn't think twice about the offer and wrapped her arms around Kitty's neck.
"I love you too, my darling", she whispered, while she rubbed the hand up and down on her daughters back. "Always have and always will."
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Tom stopped walking, a smile crept up on his face and was holding his ground, not wanting to move an inch. He looked at the scene before him. Kitty was sleeping in the hospital bed, the white sheets neatly tucked under her arms. Sylvie was holding the newborn baby, her index finger was covered by the baby's tiny fingers.
He took a moment to enjoy this incredible view, not wanting it to end. He was on his way back from visiting Elliot and Mr. Fox, their lawyer, when he reached Flora's house. He had just opened the door when an overexcited Flora and a anxious Rosalie dragged him back on the streets. Flora delivered the news: Kitty was in labor. They rushed to the hospital, it took the several minutes to find the right floor where Kitty was.
Flora and Rosalie waited in the hallway while they gestured for him to go in. And now, now he was standing in the room, leaning against the pale yellow colored wall, looking at his wife and from now on his stepdaughter.
He put one foot before the other, the sole of his shoes echo on the spotless floor. Sylvie must have heard it, because she turned her head around. He was not met with a straight face, a person who was trying her best to hide the emotions. Instead Sylvie was smiling at him, actually smiling. "Look who that is", she said, taking the baby's small hand and tried to make it wave at him. "It's daddy."
Kitty must have heard her speak because she opened her eyes and yawned. When her eyes caught him a big smile appeared on her face. "Tom", she said, the sleepiness still audible in her soft voice.
He kissed her on her lips, while stroking her cheek affectionately. She took his hand and enclosed it with hers. "How are you feeling?"
She kissed his hand. "I'm ok. Sylvie stayed with me the entire time." She looked over to Sylvie, who was still holding the baby. She once again looked at him, while she stood up and handed him the little girl cradled in her arms.
When she finally put the three-and-a-half pound baby girl in his arms, the feeling that went through his body was indescribable. The only two times in his life when he felt like this, was when they put Arthur and William in his arms for the first time. He pulled the baby close, while kissing the top of her head.
"It's a girl, Tom", Kitty said, the happiness very much present in her voice, while the tears founds its way down. "It's a girl", she repeated.
"Oh, yes", he said. "You are beautiful." He once again kissed the baby, only this time he kissed her cheeks. "You are going to beautiful just like mummy", he whispered in the baby's ear.
In the corner of his eyes he saw Sylvie slowly get up from the chair she had been occupying the moment he arrived. "Sylvie", he said, while she slowly turned around. "Please, stay." He smiled, trying to encourage the young woman he now called his stepdaughter to stay.
"You are part of this family now", he continued, before he paused a moment, trying to figure out the right words to say. To make the young woman stay. "If you'll have us." He smiled, which was his best attempt at letting Sylvie feel welcome in the Gillan household. Slowly, Sylvie took a few steps back to the hospital bed, bewildered.
Kitty looked at him, her face covered in amazement. "Tom, what are you saying?"
He cleared his throat. He could finally be telling them the great news. The news he had been dying to share with them. "I had a talk with Elliot today. He has agreed to the settlement. You have full custody over Sylvie now."
Kitty and Sylvie's face bared the same expression. They were very, very surprised with this news. "Really?" Sylvie asked, like she still couldn't believe it.
"Yes, I am very serious", he confirmed. "After Elliot has signed the agreement you are officially part of the Gillan household."
"I-" Sylvie started, her mouth still open, caused by the bewilderment. "I don't know what to say. This-" She breathed in. "This is amazing. Thank you, Thomas. For everything." He just smiled at her.
Today, he not only welcomed a little girl in his household, but also the young woman Kitty had been telling him about ever since they started meeting each other in the woods. Ever since Kitty had told him about the existence of Sylvie he always wondered what she would look like. He wondered if she would have Kitty's hair color or the same freckles scattered across her face, or maybe even the same color of her eyes.
He imagined she would be a lot like Kitty. She once told him she was a fierce, spiky little thing and she was right. Sylvie really proved to be like Kitty when she had given her testimony in court. She withheld all the accusations Elliot's lawyer had against her own mother and even after hearing them, she still wanted to live with Kitty rather than Elliot.
He was happy he could finally provide her with something he thought Sylvie always wanted. Her mother back in her life.
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Kitty blinked with her eyes, adjusting to the bright light that founds its chance to shine through the curtains. She let out a big sigh. She never once felt this happy in her life. Of course, she was happy when she had found Thomas amongst a hospital full of sufferance, sorrow and death. But there was always a part of her that missed Sylvie, thought about how her little monkey was growing up to be.
And now, now she had everything she ever wished for. She gave birth to a healthy baby girl she and Tom decided to call Emma Gillan and Sylvie was part of that. This was the final straw, the final thing that pushed Sylvie over her boundaries… The last strike to her wall, which was part of her defense system for some many years, and it had been torn down by something she wasn't familiar with: love.
Her thoughts were interrupted by a very familiar voice. A voice she hadn't heard since court. "I heard we had a very important patient with us." Kitty turned her head and saw Matron Grace Cartner walking towards her, completely dressed in the uniform of a Matron. She had heard that after the war Grace went back to England to work in the hospital. Nursing had been her main goal in life, she had nothing else to live for.
Grace sat down on the chair, which was positioned next to the bed she was laying in. Grace smiled at her and asked: "So, how are you?"
It was Kitty's turn to smile. "I'm good. No, I'm great, actually." When she encountered Grace's questioning look, she explained: "Elliot has decided to agree to a settlement. I have full custody of Sylvie from now on."
"Oh, that is wonderful", Grace said, the smile still present on her face.
"And I have you to thank for that as well", Kitty said. "I never properly thanked you for your witness statement. It really helped. So, thank you, Matron."
"It's just Grace Carter for you now, Kitty."
"Sorry", Kitty said, a weak smile on her face. "Old habits die hard."
Grace looked around, spotting the baby sleeping in her cradle. She stood up and looked at the little girl laying in the cradle. "So", she said, her eyes fixed on her newborn daughter. "Civilian life is really suiting you." Grace looked back at her, leaving the baby to her main task: sleeping. "You look really happy."
Kitty smiled. "I am. I'm very happy to have found Thomas. If it wasn't for him, his faith in me, I would have never got the life I always wanted."
"Yes, well", Grace said. "You two never really were discreet. Everyone around the hospital knew about you two. Colonel Purbright never found out."
"You knew?" When Grace simply nodded, Kitty asked: "Then why haven't you said anything at the time?"
Grace sat down at the chair she had been occupying only moments ago. Grace took Kitty's hand in hers and said with a smile on her face, a warm smile she had never thought Grace would be capable of. "I might look like someone who doesn't feel anything. I keep the emotions deep under the surface, as much as you do."
Grace squeezed her hand slightly. "But I know true love when I see it", she continued. "I once loved someone very deeply, but he was taken away from me because of the war." Grace stopped for a moment to compose herself. "I knew how much you had been through and you deserved someone like Thomas to love you. He really makes you happy. I could even tell that at the time."
Now it was Kitty's turn to squeeze Grace's hand. "Then I have even more to thank you for. We might have never had the chance to start this life if I had been send home."
"Everyone deserves to be happy, including you, Katherine Gillan. Even people who make the biggest mistakes."
Kitty felt a lump in her throat, while the tears welled up in her eyes. "Thank you, Grace", she said, the emotions tinkering with the steadiness of her voice. "Thank you for everything."
Grace only smiled, let go of her hand and stood up. "Well", she said. "I have to start my rounds. Good luck to you, all of you. If I am ever in Glasgow, I will definitely visit you. Goodbye, Kitty."
"Goodbye, Grace Carter", Kitty said, looking at her former boss to start walking away. She kept her gaze on her until she finally left the room.
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The night slowly absorbed the last ray of sunshine that shined over England's Capital. People of the big city slowly retreaded themselves into their house or the local pub. Thomas walked into the hospital room Kitty was currently occupying. He sat down at the only empty chair in the room and looked at the person sitting beside him.
Sylvie looked away from baby Emma, who was still sleeping in her cradle. He smiled at her. Sylvie had been very happy ever since the baby had arrived. It was like she finally dared herself to come out of her shell, like she finally let herself feel alive. Live life to the fullest.
The silence had occupied the room. Only the light breathing of the sleeping Kitty had interrupted it. "Did you really mean what you said…" It was Sylvie who spoke those words, the volume of her voice decreasing so she wouldn't wake up her mother. "You know, that I'm part of the Gillan household if I want to?"
At moments like this he wished he had done a little more than threaten and blackmail Elliot Vincent. He wished he would've hit Elliot so hard that he would think twice about hitting another human being ever in his life. Elliot had screwed up Sylvie very bad and he would do anything in his power to let her blossom. One of the reasons she didn't blossom while being raised in London, in the high society of London, was because she longed for love. Love she never got from her father.
"Yes", he said, a reassuring smile appeared on his face, underlining the sincerity of his words. She was still looking at him in disbelieve.
"Sylvie", he said, the words were delivered with a low volume. "Don't be surprised when we do something for you, expecting nothing in return." He paused for a moment. "We do things because we love each other."
"And you would love me?", she asked. "Even if I'm not your real daughter?"
"Of course", were the only two words which contained the answer to Sylvie's two questions.
"Why?"
It was a simple question, only the answer would be harder and more complicated. Elliot had said he doubted Tom would love Sylvie like she was her own and now, now Sylvie was doing the same. "Because", he said, the start of his plea. "You are a very important part of Kitty's life. You always had been and Kitty has loved you ever since you two were separated."
He smiled, thinking back to the time where she told him all those amazing stories about Sylvie. "She has told me so much about you when we worked together in the field hospital during the war."
"She told you about me when you two met?"
He nodded. "Yes", he confirmed. "She told me from the moment we started to become more than friends. Our relationship had a very rough start."
"Really?", Sylvie asked, a smile finally decided to creep up on her face, but it didn't have the power to wipe out the surprising look her face still contained. "What happened?"
"Well, from the moment she arrived I was captivated by her. I offered her a hand to help her out of her truck and she refused it at the spot." He heard Sylvie laugh. "My friend Miles was trying to flirt with her. He flirted with everyone at the time, sometimes he still does. He was getting nowhere with your mother."
"So, what happened next?" Sylvie was hanging on to every word he was saying. He got her full attention.
He told her the full story. About how he yelled at her after she stood in his operating tent, totally out of the blue. Later he had explained to her that he only got angry with her because she had seen him look at a patient with regret, that he had failed him. But at the time he wasn't ready to let anyone in, especially not someone like her.
And of course, he couldn't leave out the one time she had slapped him in the operating tent. Sylvie laughed, covering her mouth with her hand. "What did you say?"
"I said some things I do regret, but I was angry at the time. I thought she was playing games, like I thought she was playing a game with Miles. My stupid pride got the better of me and I was jealous Miles got to spent the day with her, not me." He took in a deep breath and still remembered his exact words he spoke in the operating tent. "I said to her that she was just having fun. Collecting man for fun, tie them up for her amusement. I said I wasn't going to dance to her tune."
"You really said that?", she asked, the surprise very much present in the tone of her voice. When he simply nodded, she continued: "You can't really say that to a woman, especially to someone like my mother."
He laughed. "Yes, I found that out. The hard way." He rubbed his cheek. The same cheek Kitty had slapped in the operating tent so many years ago. "She had slapped me hard. So hard, I didn't know she had that in her." He shrugged. "I lash out to people when I'm hurt. Not really a good quality, something your mother likes to remind me off quite frequently."
"And then what happened?"
He smiled at the curiosity of his stepdaughter. "During that time Flora Marshall – the friend of us you met today – organized a do and decided it would be fun if your mother and Rosalie would sing. So I decided to see if it was any good and then your mother started to sing. That was the time I realized how much I cared. But before that could develop one of our nurses was trialed for treason. She had helped her German fiancée escape and one of our other staff members saw it happen."
He paused for a moment, giving Sylvie the time to processthe words that were just spoken. "And the nurse, what happened to her?"
"The fiancée eventually decided to turn himself in so that the nurse could be free, but Joan, the nurse, didn't want that. They were both convicted to hard labor until the end of the war", he explained.
"Then how did you and my mom started your relationship?"
"After the entire trial we talked in the supply hut. It was the first time she told me about you. At the time she didn't go into detail about what happened, but I figured she would tell me when she was ready." He looked at Sylvie, who was looking at him with a big surprise written across her face. "I still could remember her exact words."
"What did she say?" Sylvie asked before he could even continue and tell her what Kitty had said about her daughter so many years ago.
"She said that you hated wearing shoes and wanted a dragon for Christmas. You were beautiful and utterly fearless. You were a fierce, spiky little thing."
"Really?"
"Really", Thomas assured her. "And after that we gotten to know each other better. She finally let me in and told me piece by piece until I knew it all."
Sylvie smiled. It was the first time he had talked to Sylvie alone. During her visit they just said the necessary things, there was no time for bonding. He was happy he was given the opportunity to do it now. "You two really love each other, do you?"
"Yes, Sylvie. I love your mom very much."
"I'm glad", she said, while looking at her mother. Kitty was still sleeping, her chest moved the same time she breathed in. "She deserves it."
The silence returned to the hospital room. They both had a lot to think about. He was ready to put all that had happened the past two months behind him. This would not be the moment he let Sylvie in. He let her in so many years ago, when Kitty told him about the existence of her daughter. That was the moment he realized he cared for Sylvie as much as he cared for her. It was now up to him to prove that he didn't expect anything in return. If she cared for him, but more importantly, if she cared for Kitty, there was nothing that he would expect from her.
"So", he said. "Have you decided what you are going to do after this? It seems that you have finished high school."
"I don't know. I really love to write, but I don't know if I can do anything with that." She looked at him, her chocolate brown eyes met his sea blue one's.
He contemplated to put his hand on hers, squeeze it to make sure he was behind it, but decided it would be too soon. They had to take their time to bond. He would not push her. He didn't want to drive her away if he took too big of a risk. "We'll figure it out when we're home, ok?"
She smiled. "Home", she said. "Still sounds a bit funny to me, like this is some dream."
"Well, Sylvie", he said, trying to transmit the kindness he intended his next words. "This is very real. You are coming home."
"Finally."
So, this is the last chapter. There is one epilogue coming up and then this story has come to an end. Still can't believe it!
Anyway, I hope you like this chapter. A review would me much appreciated. Thank you!
