AN: Wow, I'm SO SORRY that it's been so long! Apparently junior year in college is a lot like junior year in high school! I've been so busy with homework that I've barely had time to have a life. So, because it's been so long, I won't bother writing a whole lot here. I know you're anxious to get to the story. I hope you enjoy this chapter!
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. If I did, I wouldn't have to bother with school and I'd have all the time in the world to write. *Sigh*. Maybe some day.
Lily walked through the dark corridors of Hogwarts by herself late the next night, slightly unnerved by the shadows and narrow patches of moonlight that cast an eerie light on the suits of armor and portraits that lined the walls. James would have been furious with her if he knew she was by herself, but she hadn't intended to patrol alone. When McGonagall had reminded him of his detention at the breakfast table that morning, he had made Lily promise that she would find someone to go with her, and she had fully intended to keep her promise, but Carrie had detention that night as well, and Hannah had disappeared after dinner. From the looks that had been passing between Remus and Hannah at dinner, Lily suspected that she at least knew who Hannah was spending time with, but she hadn't wanted to interrupt them.
So now Lily was walking silently through the deserted corridors, wondering what James was doing. There wasn't a lot to occupy her mind as she walked. She hadn't met anyone out of bed yet. She was extremely grateful that she hadn't met any snogging couples all night. Thinking about snogging got her thinking about James again, and she smiled to herself, remembering how James had looked the night before in his Quidditch robes, or even how he had looked in just a towel as he'd scampered across the common room with a deep blush on his sculpted cheeks. Lily blushed now, thinking about his wet, gorgeously muscled chest, his athletic, lean legs, and his damp hair that was curling slightly over his ears.
Lily sighed and descended the stairs toward the dungeons, her mind now on how James had smiled at her numerous times during their classes, reassuring her, or teaching her something that she didn't remember. She was pleased that the longer she spent in class, the more she remembered. So far all that she remembered was spells, potions, and bit of Wizarding history, but she was hopeful that soon she would start remembering things about her life, about her friends, and especially about her relationship with James.
Lily's foot was poised just above the stairs at the other end of the dungeons corridor when she heard a murmur of voices coming from an empty dungeon behind her. She paused for a moment, wondering if she should go investigate. The dungeon corridor, with its low lighting and deep shadows made her nervous. With a deep breath she calmed her frazzled nerves and walked back toward the dungeon. She stopped just outside the thick wooden door, waiting to hear something more.
"Silence. If anyone hears of our plan it will mean failure. And the Dark Lord does not look kindly on those who fail him," said an angry hiss, rising above the murmuring voices. A silence fell across the room, which lasted for several seconds. Lily wished that she could see what was happening, but the only glimpse in would be through the tiny crack in between the bottom of the door and the floor.
"We only wish to know more of the plan. If we are to risk our lives, we want to know when it will happen. We want to fight," said a familiar, deep voice. Lily froze and listened more intently, laying her ear against the side of the door.
"We cannot risk it, Severus. You will know when we need your services. That's what the marks are for," said the same hissing voice.
"I think we have proven trustworthy, Professor. We brought the Dark Lord the," began Severus after another short pause.
"Do not speak so carelessly of what you have done for the Dark Lord. Even now there could be members of the Order listening and Dumbledore is never far," said the hissing voice. The voice was not raised in anger, but there was a steely harshness to it that caused goose bumps to rise all along Lily's arms.
"If there are then let them stop being cowards and come out of hiding! We know exactly how to deal with them," said another harsh voice.
Lily felt shivers run through her body, and decided that she had better leave before the meeting ended. She would run to Dumbledore's office and tell him exactly what she had overheard. She crept as slowly as she could through the shadows of the corridor, trying to make as little noise as possible. So when she ran into a suit of armor that she had not seen in the darkness, she couldn't help gasping as the metal armor crashed to the floor with a deafening clang.
Lily paused in shock for a few seconds before she heard the door bang open behind her. She ran towards the stairs and had just made it to the bottom step when a hand reached out and grabbed her ankle. Knocked off balance, she fell towards the stairs and stuck her arm out to catch herself. She felt the bone in her left arm snap as she caught herself on one of the steps. She yelped and curled her arm into her chest while she kicked out behind herself with her foot and tried to scramble up the steps.
"Severus, don't let her go," said the hissing voice. Lily looked back and caught Severus's eye. He was still clutching her ankle and looking at her with horror in his eyes. He didn't move, he didn't blink, he just stared at her with the most heart-breaking expression that Lily had ever seen.
"Lily," said Severus, looking like a man on fire.
"Ah, we've caught a mudblood," said the harsh voice as a thick-set boy with blond hair strode toward them. The boy smiled and Lily felt her entire body go suddenly cold. "You know what to do Severus."
"No," said Severus with a shaking voice, but he was still clutching Lily's ankle tightly.
"Severus, are you going weak on us? The Dark Lord will be so disappointed when he hears," said the hissing voice. Lily tried to see who was talking, but the blond boy stepped right in front of her.
"Well, if you won't deal with her, step aside." His eyes were an unnaturally dark color. It was hard to distinguish the iris from the pupil. It was shocking with his pale skin and pale blond hair.
"No, Renwood. This is Severus's chance to decide what side he's on," said the man with the hissing voice. He glided towards them, his long black robes billowing out before him. His face was covered in a white mask. Only his eyes, which were an unnatural shade of red, were visable, and Lily shuddered as they glanced briefly at her before resting on Severus.
"We can't kill her, Sir. Dumbledore is already suspicious," said Severus quietly, looking just below the man's mask.
"Imagine how suspicious he will be when this girl starts telling him tales," said the man coldly. Lily felt another shudder run through her body as she heard his voice. She wanted desperately to break free of Severus's grasp and run for it, but she knew that she probably wouldn't get far. There were several students now gathered around them, watching the proceedings.
"We could modify her memory, Sir. Then no one would ever know, and we wouldn't draw attention to ourselves," said Severus in a calm voice, rising to his feet and grabbing Lily by the arm, tugging her up beside him.
"I'm curious that you aren't sickened by being so close to that disgraceful mudblood, Severus. Her tainted blood is calling out to me, begging to be spilled," said the man, advancing on Severus, his eyes flashing, "You needn't worry yourself too much about our secrecy, Severus, if that really is your fear. Because we won't draw attention to ourselves with her death. After all, when we're done with her, there won't be a body left to find." There was a wave of malicious chuckles from behind the man in the black robes. His mask was lit by the torch above the entrance to the stairway, his red eyes gleaming and reflecting the flickering fire.
"Severus is too weak. Let me do it," said Renwood, the sound of his footfalls on the cement floor echoing through the corridor. He gazed at Lily with such hatred that she stumbled in her attempt to step back. Severus reached out and grabbed the arm that she had been holding to her chest and she cried out in pain. He turned back to look at her with panic in his eyes.
"No, Renwood, you'll have plenty of opportunity to kill mudbloods once the Dark Lord takes his rightful place in the world. I'd like to see Severus do this," said the black-robed man with pleasure ringing through his voice. "You are going to do this Severus, or we will kill both of you. Don't waste your precious pure blood for a filthy mudblood."
"Waste my blood for this filthy mudblood?" asked Severus, laughing cruelly as he shoved Lily off of him. Stunned, Lily didn't have time to try to keep her balance. She crumpled onto the floor, banging her head on the stairs behind her. Her body ached and she stared up at Severus in horror. "I'm surprised that you fell for my little joke."
"Let's not waste any more time, Severus," said the man in the black robes. Severus turned around and stared to the right of Lily. Lily felt anger welling inside of her and it snapped her out of the panic that had left her paralyzed. She slowly reached for the wand that was sticking out of her right pocket.
"Right," said Severus, advancing on Lily. His eyes were steady and filled with hatred as he moved through the patches of light and shadow to her until he was standing just above her. "Sorry, Lily," he whispered quietly, his wand twitching slightly as he pointed it towards her. "Cruc-"
She jumped up suddenly, ignoring the protests of her aching body. She might not survive this, but she refused to be killed without fighting back. Without much thought she silently whipped her wand through the air and the ground shook violently beneath their feet. Several of the students pitched over, the suits of armor fell with a clatter to the floor, taking out several students like dominos as the fell, and the portraits fell off the walls and shattered on the cement. A torch fell from where it was held on the wall and landed on the black robes of the man with the hissing voice. He shrieked in a high-pitched voice and flailed around the hallway. Lily didn't stop to watch their shocked expressions. She turned on her heel and threw herself up the stairs two at a time.
Lily ran all the way to the seventh floor, feeling her head pounding with each step. She was almost to the entrance to the head common room when she ran into a solid figure that was walking towards her. She caught a flash of charred black material before she screamed and shoved off from the figure, running past the common room and trying to think of where she could hide. She needed to find somewhere that was populated.
"Mudblood, you can't win. I will find you, and I will tear you limb from limb. They'll find little pieces of your body scattered through the corridors," said the hissing voice.
Lily thought about circling back to the head common room, but she realized that it would take her too long to open the room and disappear inside. She couldn't go to Gryffindor tower. Unless she ran really fast, she would run into the same problem. And since it was after curfew, there wasn't really going to be any people in the library. Lily began to panic, realizing that she didn't have much hope. Why did everyone have to pick this night to follow curfew?
"Evans?" asked a voice curiously as she streaked past.
"Black?" she asked. She paused and turned on her heel, feeling her heart beat slow down at the sight of another person. They were in the corridor with the statue of the one-eyed witch. She peered behind herself and saw with relief that the corridor was empty.
"You're not going to give me a detention for being out after curfew, are you?" he asked with a smirk.
"Black, you've got to help me," said Lily as she gasped for breath and ignored his question. Now that she had stopped she felt paralyzed by fear again. She clutched tightly at his shoulder with her good arm and stared at him pleadingly.
"What's wrong?" he asked suddenly, his smirk melting into a frown.
"There's someone after me. I have to find somewhere to hide," said Lily frantically.
"Who's after you?" asked Sirius angrily. Lily felt him squeeze her arm. His eyes were filled with fire.
"Please, Black. I'll tell you when we're safe," said Lily in a strangled voice.
"Alright, come here," said Sirius. He shoved her behind himself and tapped the statue of the one-eyed witch with his wand, muttering something under his breath. The witch slid down into the floor and a narrow tunnel appeared where the statue had been.
"Hop in," he said, pointing to the hole in the floor.
"Where does this go?" began Lily, staring at the dark tunnel with trepidation.
"Does it matter right now?" he shot.
"No," said Lily, and she took a deep breath and jumped into the tunnel. She clenched her lips together so that she wouldn't scream as she plunged through the air. Her stomach was filled with butterflies and she stuck her good arm out to feel for the walls of the tunnel. After a few seconds, however, her body hit the stone floor of the tunnel, but instead of stopping, she continued to slide down the sloping stone floor. Then she hit a stone wall and stopped. Sirius appeared behind her a few seconds later.
"I take it you didn't see the ladder?" said Sirius. She could tell from his voice that he was smirking.
"The ladder?" asked Lily perplexed.
"Yeah," said Sirius.
"Well, you said hop in!" accused Lily.
"I'm flattered that you trust me enough to hurl yourself down a dark tunnel without any safety net," said Sirius, "but are you ok?"
"Not really, no," said Lily, who was slumped on the cold stone floor that she had landed on. Her arm, which was surely broken, throbbed painfully and she felt like she would start crying at any moment. She didn't want to start crying in front of Sirius. It would be incredibly embarrassing.
"What happened?" asked Sirius. Lily heard the scraping of pebbles against the stone floor as Sirius scooted closer to her. He lit his wand so that she could just barely make out his face and his worried eyes.
Lily told him about the meeting that she had overheard, the group of students and the man that was wearing a black robe and a mask, and how they had attacked her. As she relived the images she felt tears run down her cheeks. Sirius scooted even closer and put his arm around her shoulder. At first she wondered what he was doing. She thought about James and how he might not like them sitting so closely. But before she could pull back she felt Sirius run his callused thumb underneath her eyes, catching the tears that were falling.
"Lily," he said quietly, moving his hand to the back of her neck.
"Wh-" began Lily, but before she could get even a word out his lips came crashing down on hers. All of a sudden images came to her brain in flashes. She saw herself in a mirror, wearing a very skimpy blue dress. She saw a green bottle spinning around and around in front of her as she sat on the carpet of her common room. Sirius stood in front of her and he leaned in towards her with a look of mingled nervousness and excitement. She felt again the kiss that she had shared with him. It was a strong memory, especially when it mixed the kiss of the past with the kiss of the present. Lily opened her eyes and the images stopped. She shoved Sirius backward with a feeling of disgust.
"What the bloody hell are we doing?" asked Lily. He had fallen back onto his elbows but he hadn't moved. He stared at her with a look of complete horror in his eyes. Lily tried not to notice the hurt that was on his face, but his wand, which had fallen on the floor in the midst of their kiss, illuminated his face.
"I, I'm sorry, Evans," he said in a gruff voice, turning away from her.
"How long was this going on?" asked Lily emotionlessly.
"How long was what?" asked Sirius, swirling the dust on the floor with his fingers.
"How long were we sneaking around behind James' back?" she asked, hugging her knees to her chest. A million thoughts were zooming through her head, but mostly she just wished that she could have gone through the rest of her life without ever remembering this kiss. It made her feel dirty and disgusting, and it made her feel dirty.
"What are you talking about?" asked Sirius calmly, still swirling dust.
"I remember. We kissed before I had my accident," said Lily impatiently.
"How much do you remember?" asked Sirius. He whipped his head back towards Lily and was gazing at her with a blank expression.
"I remember wearing a skimpy dress and kissing you. Why?" asked Lily, not sure she wanted to know.
"Oh. Well, it only happened once. You were mad at James, you had a little bit too much firewhisky, you played a game of spin-the-bottle, and we kissed. That's all," said Sirius.
"Why was I mad at James?" asked Lily curiously, feeling slightly better that she wasn't as awful as she had originally thought. She hadn't been sneaking around kissing Sirius when James was her boyfriend. Although getting drunk and kissing James's best mate just because she was angry with him probably hadn't been the best decision.
"Oh, I don't know, Evans. It's hard to keep track of your arguments. You are both way too stubborn," said Sirius in an annoyed tone. He was lounging against the wall now, and he had a scowl on his face.
"So what do we do about this?" asked Lily quietly, not even wanting to think about what James would say if she told him.
"Well, we're not going to tell him, Evans. You don't remember when he caught us last time, but I do, and it's not something that I want to re-live," said Sirius, throwing pebbles across the floor.
"He saw us kiss?" asked Lily in horror.
"Yeah," said Sirius.
"I can't believe he doesn't hate me!" said Lily, remembering how kind he had been to her ever since she woke up.
"He's always been in love with you, Evans. He's not going to just let you go," said Sirius in an odd tone.
Lily tried to figure out what was in his tone that made it sound so strange, but before she had a chance, a muffled voice began speaking in their tunnel. Lily jumped but Sirius just calmly reached into his pocket and pulled out a small mirror.
"Pads?" asked a voice. The voice echoed through the tunnel, and Lily was surprised that she recognized it. She would have gone to look at the mirror if she wasn't so wary of getting close to Sirius again.
"Hey, Prongs," said Sirius.
"Have you seen Lily? I've been trying to find her for the past half-hour," said James.
"She's right here," said Sirius, handing the mirror to Lily. She took the mirror curiously and looked into it, surprised to see James's face reflected in the mirror instead of her own.
"Lily? Where are you?" asked James, visibly calming as he smiled at her through the mirror.
"We're hiding in a tunnel. There was a statue and Sirius made it disappear and the tunnel appeared," said Lily.
"The statue of the one-eyed witch?" asked James. Lily glanced briefly up at Sirius, who merely nodded. He had extinguished his wand so his body was just barely visible to Lily.
"Yeah," said Lily.
"I'll be right there," James said. His face vanished from the mirror and Lily handed it back to Sirius wordlessly. They sat silently for a few minutes before Sirius stood up.
"I think I'm going to go," he said suddenly.
"But what about the man in the black robes?" asked Lily, who actually would rather if he wasn't there when James arrived, but she didn't want him to get hurt either.
"He's not after me. And if he wants a fight, I'm ready," said Sirius. Lily heard his shoes hitting the metal rungs of the ladder, and a small bit of light filtered into the tunnel as he opened the entrance. She could see his lithe figure disappearing through the hole in the ceiling. After a few minutes, a loud click sounded and Lily was plunged once again into darkness.
Once she was alone and in the darkness, she allowed her tears to fall. She felt the pure panic again, and wondered how long she would be hiding out here in this dark tunnel. She thought about Severus's hate-filled face and felt sickened. Someone had to warn Dumbledore, but she couldn't make herself go. She kept thinking about the man in the dark robes, about the hatred that wasn't concealed by his mask.
After only a few minutes, she heard a clicking sound and light once again filtered into the tunnel. She saw another figure descend the ladder, and she backed as noiselessly as she could into the deepest shadow in case it wasn't James. The entrance sealed again and the tunnel was pitch black. The little bit of light that had entered the tunnel made it so that her eyes had to adjust to the total darkness again.
"Lily?"asked James as he lit his wand and strode toward her.
"James?" asked Lily, wiping away the tears that were running down her face.
"Oh, Merlin, Lily. What happened?" asked James, crouching down beside her and pulling her into a tight hug.
For the second time Lily repeated what had happened in the dungeons, and how she had been chased through the corridors. She told James about running into Sirius and about them hiding in the tunnel. She didn't say anything about their kiss, even though she felt incredibly guilty. But really, she hadn't wanted him to kiss her. She only wanted James to kiss her.
"I just don't understand why they hate me so much, James. What did I do?" she asked, embarrassed that tears were still falling down her cheeks.
"Oh, Lily. You didn't do anything. I don't want you ever to think that this is your fault," said James tenderly, cupping her cheek in the palm of his hand, "Voldemort and his death eaters are miserable excuses for wizards."
"Voldemort? Death eaters?" asked Lily. The words sounded familiar to her, she even felt a shiver go through her at the words, but she couldn't remember what they meant.
"You don't remember, do you? And nobody's really wanted to explain it," said James regretfully. He stared at Lily for a second with sorrowful eyes before he began. "Our world is in a war right now, Lily. Voldemort and his death eaters want to take over the wizarding world. They want to make it so that muggle-borns, witches and wizards whose parents aren't wizards, can't learn magic. He wants to kill them all."
"So if he comes to power, then he's going to kill me?" asked Lily with tears in her eyes.
"I'll never let that happen, Lily. I'll always protect you, always keep you safe," James said, rubbing his thumb just under her chin.
"I feel safe with you," said Lily, staring up into his hazel eyes.
"I'm so glad you're ok, Lily. And I'm really sorry that I wasn't there. I should have made sure that you had someone to patrol with," said James apologetically.
"It's not your fault, James," said Lily soothingly. She reached out her left hand, forgetting that she had broken it, and winced in pain.
"Are you alright?" asked James anxiously.
"I think I broke my arm, when I fell on the stairs," said Lily dismissively.
"We have to get you to Madame Pomphery. She can fix that easily," said James. He pulled Lily to her feet and began to walk toward the ladder.
"Wait, James, what about the guy who was chasing me? I don't want to be wandering the castle with him still lurking in the corridors somewhere," said Lily in a panic.
"Oh Lily, all of the professors are awake and searching the castle. They've been looking for him for the past half-hour," said James tenderly.
"How did they know about him? I haven't talked to Dumbledore yet," said Lily.
"One of the house-elves, Winky, saw you running down the corridor and that man chasing you. She ran right to Dumbledore and told him," said James.
"Remind me to find Winky and thank her tomorrow," said Lily.
"Alright. Let's get out of here," said James, pulling Lily to her feet. He put his arm around her and pulled her close to him. Lily had a feeling that it would be a while before James let her go and she definitely didn't mind.
"I went to Dumbledore, Sir. I tolds him all that you asked me to," said Winky brightly, startling Severus who was hiding in a little nook behind a tapestry on the second floor.
"Thank you, Winky. Has he been found?" asked Severus.
"No, Sir. Theys all looking for him, but he hasn't been found," said Winky, her ears drooping as she pulled at her dishtowel.
"And Lily?" asked Severus anxiously. He had really wanted to ask about her first, but he had held himself back.
"I saws her going to the hospital wing, Sir. Mr. Potter was taking her," said Winky.
Severus frowned slightly for a second before shifting his face into a neutral expression. "Thank you, Winky," he said tiredly, rubbing his forehead. After tonight, there was no way that he could salvage his friendship with Lily. Once again, he saw the chasm that was opening between them, separating them. In his dreams he could pretend that it didn't exist, as a child, it had been easy for him to ignore, but now it was firmly set in place. It was unavoidable. He only allowed himself a moment of sorrow before he forced himself to go numb. And as he swept out of the nook to return to his fellow Slytherins, he told himself that she was better off without him.
AN: So, I'm sorry to say that I'm really not sure when I'll be able to post the next chapter. I have a major test this week that I should probably be studying for right now. Ooops! Anyway, I'm going to try to post the next chapter by next Sunday night, but I'm not going to make any promises. Feel free to click the button below and tell me what you thought of the chapter. If you have any suggestions, I'm always open to them. Well, good night and happy fanficing!
Love,
Littlemisskrissy
