Chapter 12

A Second Look

"Here you are, Hawke-san," Sanji smiled as he placed a plate of sandwiches on the table in front of her, "I hope they are to your liking."

Hawke reached out and took one, taking a nibble out of the corner before smiling and nodding. "Delicious, as always, Sanji."

The cook's eyes became hearts as he turned back to the kitchen and busied himself with cleaning up the trimmings from making her an early morning snack.

It had been a day since their departure from Warship Island, but Hawke hadn't had a good sleep since then. After tossing and turning hours after she'd retired for the night, she decided it was best to just get up. Sanji had been on watch again and Hawke had asked him if he minded whipping up something for the both of them.

"Thank you," Hawke smiled at Sanji's back as he put his knives back in their proper drawers and picked up a two cups of black tea.

"I am the luckiest man on earth since I get to hear you say that," he said as he sat down across from her. He smiled as he set one cup down near her hand.

Hawke finished her sandwich, a ham and cheese one, took the tea and lifted it to her lips, enjoying the warmth the cup offered and the slightly bitter scent of the liquid within. She took a sip and let out a comfortable hum as the warmth spread into her body.

"If you don't mind me asking, Hawke-chan-" Sanji's voice drew her attention. She nodded her head lazily and kept the tea clenched close to her chin, "How is your leg doing?"

Hawke flexed her foot under the table and frowned at the tugging pain she received. "It's still quite sore," she admitted, "But as long as we don't have any trouble before we get to the Red Line, I think it'll heal nicely. It's already better than it was yesterday."

Sanji looked relieved as he gave a satisfied nod. "And how did you get that wound?" he asked, taking a sip from his own cup and placing it elegantly back on its saucer.

Hawke's eyes focused on the cook's kind, yet firm, gaze and felt her body relaxing. "I fell victim to a surprise attack by the marines," she said slowly, tracing a finger along the rim of the cup, "I tried to run, but one of them got me in the leg and hand," she lifted her palm to show the slice across the back of her hand, "The marine doctor patched me up but I'm afraid my escape attempt caused them to open again."

A worried look passed over Sanji's face, but he smiled and nodded. A silence fell as they both enjoyed their warm drinks. Hawke reached for another sandwich and took a bite; Mmm, she thought, closing her eyes, tomato and fish this time.

A sighing sound caused her to open her eyes and she looked up to see Sanji staring dreamily at her. Her cheeks flushed and she quickly averted her gaze.

"Is there something else?" she mumbled, taking larger bites out of her sandwich.

"Oh, it's nothing, Hawke-san," the cook's voice sounded warm and inviting, "I was simply imagining that the colours of the All Blue must be as deep and beautiful as your lovely eyes."

The girl blink and fixed Sanji with a curious stare. "The All Blue?" she lifted an eyebrow, "That's the Sea where all the Blue's mix together, right?"

Sanji's eyes lit up and he nodded, taking another sip of tea. "I made it my mission to find that magical sea that all cook's dream of," he smiled widely, "And to serve all the beautiful ladies of the world."

Hawke smiled, "A fitting dream for the chef of the Pirate King," she let out a soft chuckle. Then she bit thoughtfully into her sandwich. She realized that she knew next to nothing about the people Luffy had chosen for his crew. She hadn't even thought about them having their own goals and reasons for sailing with her brother. Her attention had been focused solely on the rubberboy since the moment she'd woken on the Going Merry. Maybe I should talk with the others, she thought, slowly chewing her food, they seem to be good people.

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Sanji's eyes caressed every inch of Hawke's frame as the beautiful lady let her guard down in front of him for the first time. Her flowing, deep brown locks swayed gently and her shoulders bounced gracefully as she blessed him with a laugh.

This woman was quite different from the fiery and passionate Nami-san. Here was a gentle, silent beauty. A woman who felt no fear in displaying her devotion to those so lucky to have it bestowed upon them (even if it was that stupid rubber idiot) but who also guarded her secrets closely. No longer was their dear navigator the sole blooming rose amongst the thorns of their crew. I'm such a lucky man, the cook thought, looking into the dredges of his tea cup, to have such magnificent females to protect and serve. He lifted his gaze and saw that Hawke-chan was nibbling on the food he'd prepared for her. His heart skipped a beat as a small smile lifted her slender pink lips as she swallowed. He'd only seen that smile directed at their captain, her brother, and it gave rise to a desire to have her look upon him with such a gentle gaze.

But wait, he had seen her smile at another like that…

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"Hawke-chan?" Sanji's voice drew her out of her thoughts and she looked up. The cook was running his thumb along the rim of his empty cup and giving her a curious stare. But he smiled when he drew her attention, "You certainly have a way with children."

Hawke blinked, a little startled at the sudden question. "W-well," she mumbled, "Not really, I don't really like kids…" Her eyes became hard as she felt her guard coming back up.

"Oh?" Sanji looked surprised, "But you were very kind to Apis-san. Quite protective of her too, you hardly left her bedside. And your farewell was quite heartwarming."

Hawke nodded her head. The plate between them was empty, as was her cup. "Well, she was different," she muttered, setting her cup down with a clink and rising from the table. Sanji's eyebrow rose with her and he opened his mouth. But Hawke turned her face away before he could get a word out. She plucked the empty dishes from the table and moved towards the kitchen.

"Oh! Please, allow me," Sanji's hands were suddenly taking the plate and cups from her.

Hawke frowned and felt a giddy sensation rising in her chest. She reached out, unable to restrain her hands, and tried to take the dishes back. "P-please," she stammered, "Please let me, Sanji." She met the cook's surprised gaze, his mouth opened to form another intrusive question. Her resolve disintegrated and she quickly turned towards the door. "Never mind," she mumbled as she left the galley, "Thank you for the snack."

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Hawke squinted her eyes open as the soft tapping of footsteps brought her out of her slumber. She focused in on the sound and saw Nami making her way up the stairs out of her room. Hawke was about to roll over and go back to sleep, when her conversation with Sanji, and subsequent realization, resurfaced in her mind.

"Nami," she sat up and stretched, looking up to see the navigator paused on the stairs, her hand resting on the handle of the trap door in the ceiling, "Why did you join Luffy's crew?"

The orange haired girl fixed Hawke with a stare and let her hand fall. "Why the sudden curiosity?" she asked.

Hawke felt her cheeks warming. She swung her feet out onto the floor and stood up. "I… was just wondering," she mumbled, pulling her boots back on, the brown hide felt cool against her skin and woke her up a bit more.

"Well, the short version is Luffy saved me and my village from some tyrannical fishmen pirates," the navigator walked back down the stairs and stood facing Hawke with her hands on her hips, "I joined him so I could set sail and draw a map of the world."

Hawke blinked at the bluntness and rapidity of the response she got, but then she smiled and nodded. "Well that sounds like just the thing a navigator would do," she said. Nami's eyes brightened and she flashed Hawke a grin before turning and walking back up the stairs.

"What about you?" she asked over her shoulder.

Hawke stiffened, confused. "Pardon?" she stammered. Nami rolled her eyes and pushed the trap door open.

"I mean besides the fact that he's your brother," the orange haired girl continued, "Why did you decide to find Luffy after being apart for so long?"

Hawke shuffled her feet nervously before following after Nami. "Well…" she started carefully, "Luffy was always the only one I could truly be myself around." Nami lifted her eyebrows as Hawke continued, "When he left, there was no one I could really relate to, no one I could be free around. So I guess I've been looking for that feeling." She finished a little awkwardly and stared down at the planks, embarrassed.

"Have you found it?" Nami's question again caught her by surprise.

Hawke frowned as she thought for a moment, then she met Nami's gaze and shook her head. The navigator's eyebrows shot up again. But Hawke, surprised at her own honesty, hurried out onto the deck. She'd have to be more careful when talking to Nami in the future.

Hawke walked up the stairs and paused at the galley window. Inside, she could see Luffy and Zoro already digging into breakfast. The straw hat bobbed through the air as Luffy dodged a jab from the swordsman and successfully stole some bacon. Hawke smiled, but decided it was best to skip breakfast this morning when Nami walked by behind her and entered the galley.

Hawke turned and continued up to the rear deck, watching the sun sparkle brightly off the waves as it rose in the sky. A frown darkened her features and she stared sadly into the water. Even though she'd been more open than she'd expected with the navigator, she was surprised at the weight of the truth she'd admitted.

She hadn't found that feeling of freedom she'd been searching for. At first she had been sure that Luffy had given her the same sense of belonging and love that he had when they were children. But as the days passed, she'd realized that it wasn't the same. She still hadn't told him the truth; and she wouldn't know if she was capable of finding that feeling until she told him. But the mere thought of lifting those memories caused a sour feeling in her gut and she clenched the rail.

"Geez, you look miserable this morning," a voice made her jump and she whirled around to see Usopp sitting on the deck surrounded by bottles and powders.

"Oh, hey Usopp," Hawke tried her best to smile, but from the half amused, half worried look she got in return, she wasn't sure she'd been successful.

"What's on your mind?" the sniper went back to grinding up some leaves in his mortar, "Did Nami show you her evil side?"

Hawke lifted a curious eyebrow and sat down on the planks next to him, "Her evil side?" she asked, intrigued.

Usopp nodded wisely and sent her a furtive glance. He stopped his grinding and lifted a secretive hand to his mouth. "If she finds out you have any money, she'll steal it before you can blink!" he whispered, looking around nervously as if he expected the navigator to appear before them, "And don't let her fool you; even though she looks weak, she has enough power to knock out Luffy and Zoro!"

Hawke lifted her eyebrows, "Really?" she asked, doubtful of the sniper's words.

Usopp puffed out his chest, "Do you think that I, the great Captain Usopp, would lie?!" he brought his fist to his chest and looked boldly out at the sea, "I, who have fought with giants and dragons alike and didn't even shake with fear? The beasts of the sea and land all tremble when they hear my name because they know of my terrifying honesty!"

Hawke stared as Usopp went on about his heroic exploits, all of which she had a sneaking suspicion were false, and felt a smile coming back onto her face. Usopp noticed and seemed to draw imagination from her response. His tales grew even more fantastic and he stood up and strode around the deck, acting out fight scenes and daring rescues. Hawke let out a giggle as Usopp throttled an imaginary sea serpent that had tried to steal his socks. But the sniper seemed to sense that she knew his tales were tall.

"Well, at least that's what I will do one day," he sighed and sat back down beside her, his bravado suddenly gone.

Hawke shot him a surprised glance, then smiled and nodded. "Sounds like you're half way there," she stood and winked down at him, "They say that the will is the first step to the way."

Usopp took a moment to ponder this statement before giving her a thumbs up and a happy grin. Hawke returned the smile and headed back to the main deck. She traced her hand down the rail as she slowly descended the steps and her eyes fell on the remaining crew member she hadn't really spoken to yet.

Zoro was sitting at the base of the stairs, his arms crossed behind his head and his mouth wide open as he snored away. I'll talk to him later, Hawke thought, and couldn't help but smile as a butterfly flitted down from Nami's orange trees and rested lightly on his upturned nose. Stifling her giggle, Hawke stepped silently around the swordsman and continued on.

Her second look at the crew her brother had gathered was revealing things she'd never have thought about them. Maybe these people will like me, the thought floated through her mind as she passed the galley window again. She looked in to see Nami smacking Luffy's head with unbridled fury; an empty plate was sitting in front of the navigator and bacon was flying from Luffy's mouth with each hit. Hawke concealed her frown and entered the galley to stop this assault and to find out what mischief her brother had been up to this time.