Even at nine months pregnant, Emily still insisted on coming in to work every day, despite everyone's not-so-subtle suggestions that she go on maternity leave a little early. She knew she'd drive herself absolutely crazy sitting at home just waiting to go into labour – she was already getting more and more anxious about giving birth and everything that could possibly go wrong with each passing day. She needed work to distract her, not that that stopped Clyde from attempting to convince her otherwise.
Clyde had come into her office late that afternoon to attempt to convince her to go home early – as much as he liked to put on a display of bravado, she knew he was horrified by the idea of her having the baby in the office.
"Emily, why don't you knock off early – there's some bad weather headed this way and you should get home before it hits. Get some rest before the baby comes, maybe start your…"
He paused, seeing her expression.
"Oh, God, you're in labour, aren't you?" She nodded as she tried to breathe through the contraction. "I knew it. I told you this would happen."
"Relax, Clyde," she rolled her eyes as it passed. "They're more than ten minutes apart, there's no reason to panic, she's not going to come shooting out like a waterslide. I don't need to go to the hospital until contractions are six minutes apart, so just calm down and go back to your office."
"Oh, no," he shook his head adamantly, "No, Emily, you are not having this baby in this office. You need to go to the hospital. I will drive you, but you cannot stay here if that baby is on its way out of you."
Emily sat in the passenger seat of Clyde's car panting through her contraction, having reluctantly agreed to let him drive her to the hospital, mostly to shut him up.
"Looks like that storm came in earlier than they expected," he said, squinting through the heavily falling snow, "Traffic is at an absolute standstill. This could take awhile…it's a good thing we left when we did."
"Shit," she muttered under her breath, bracing herself against the dashboard with one hand as he braked suddenly.
He glanced over at her, his eyes widening in alarm, "Jesus, Emily, what the hell are you doing? Why are you taking your tights off?"
"My water just broke…"
"Oh, for God's sake," he made an exasperated noise, "I just had the seats upholstered! Couldn't you put a towel down or something?"
She rolled her eyes as she attempted to remove her underwear. "I'll have the seats cleaned; would you please just relax?"
With another look at her, he nearly swerved out of the lane. "What are you doing now!?"
"She's not going to go very far if I've still got my underwear on, now is she!?" Emily snapped, her temper rising in the throes of extreme pain.
"No, Em! No, no, no! You are not having this baby in my car! No!"
She gave a growl from low in her throat as she moved around to try and find a more comfortable position to labour in. "The baby doesn't give a crap about your car, Clyde! And I can't exactly tell her to wait for a hospital!" She couldn't help the yell she let out, finding things to be progressing much more quickly now.
He turned the car down a side street, hoping to find a less congested alternative route. "Just hold it in a little longer…"
"Get there faster!" she shouted at him, writhing in pain.
"I'm going as fast as I bloody well can," he snapped, "Unless you want us to get in a car wreck."
Finally, she could no longer take the force of the moving car against the force of her contractions. "Stop the car!" she screamed. She unbuckled the seatbelt and braced her feet on the dashboard. Clyde's expression remained rather confused and she reached over to put the car in park. "Make yourself useful and get a blanket or your coat or something to keep her warm!"
He watched on in a combination of alarm and disgust as, after a few minutes of strangled yells and pushing, she reached down and pulled a slimy squalling infant onto her chest and into the world. Not that he'd admit it out loud, but he was rather impressed.
She didn't notice him staring until after she'd cleaned out the baby's mouth, tied off the cord, and lowered her shirt to nurse the baby. "Put your eyes back in their sockets…it's not the first time you've seen a vagina. It's not even the first time you've seen mine."
"Yes, well, I haven't exactly seen one angry before… How did you do that?"
"Years of practice," she muttered sarcastically. When he made no further moves to restart the car, she raised a brow. "If we could get to the hospital sometime today, that'd be great."
