Disclaimer: I do not own Fire Emblem Fates!

Fun fact: Pieri has heterochromia iridium, a disease that causes mismatching eye colors. According to the wiki, the eye that is hidden underneath her hair is green, and it can actually be seen in one of her My Room animations.

Despite this chapter's name, know that I am incapable of writing scenes that go beyond kissing and touching and wanting. There will be implications, of course, but nothing more than that. Also, there is jealousy galore in this chapter.


Love

n. an intense feeling of affection ; v. to feel a deep affectionate, romantic, or sexual attachment.


Flannel did not know what to expect of Nishiki since their kiss. He worried frantically that their relationship would turn awkward, or that he had been too hasty in his decision. Saying that he was embarrassed was an understatement, and he dreaded that whatever bond he shared with the fox was ruined from his affections.

So when Nishiki seemed upbeat, happier than usual, it made Flannel's heart light up. The two of them would smile at each other, and each conversation felt closer than the last. There was no doubt that what had happened between them only helped to improve their relationship, rather than hinder it.

At least, that was what Flannel assumed. Otherwise, why else would Nishiki come back to kiss him again and again? Why else would they sit so close to each other, such that they could feel their heartbeats? Why else would Flannel invite him to his room, if only to be showered with affection and sharp kisses? The bite marks that lined the fox's shoulder and neck was proof of their love; the bruises and blood that spilled from the wolf's lips and fingers was evidence of their passion and ferocity.

And the garou knew this. He knew better than anyone, that what they were doing was something that only belonged to them. He was reminded of this, each time that the youko nuzzled into him and each time that his fox fangs would drag themselves along the edge of his lips, drawing blood and pain but never misery.

Nishiki would smile at Flannel, he would hold, kiss, and bite him. He would laugh and joke and play with him, but no matter what he did, Flannel knew that it was all out of love and friendship and nothing more. It was a strong, overwhelming feeling, and it only grew stronger and stronger each time.

When Flannel thought of Nishiki, he sometimes imagined what his perfect body would look like underneath him, and what he would look like when he was pressed between the wolf and the ground, with nothing but stars in his eyes and fire in his skin.

That was when the Nohrian knew that for the first time, he truly, truly loved someone. He loved someone so much that he wanted every inch of them to be his, and he wanted the word 'Flannel' to be sighed out between beautiful lips. For the first time, Flannel felt that he loved someone so much that he would give up his body and soul if that was what it took to be together forever.

He wanted Nishiki so badly, and he could not help but hope that Nishiki wanted him, too.

...

"It's snowing again," Pieri said. Her eyes were glued to the window, watching the drifting flakes outside. "It's pretty."

"Yeah, it is." Flannel muttered. He flung the wash cloth around, not interested in the dirty tables that he had to clean up. Next to latrine duty, mess hall shifts were his least favorite chores to do. The wolf did not care for the chewed up food left behind, or the smelly mess that he had to wash away. There were good napkins and bent forks and other things that he secretly added to his collection, but the rest of it was as unsavory as the next.

Pieri knew this, but she still liked the idea of working beside Flannel anyway. Since their escapade at Mount Garou, she felt like she knew Flannel a little better. As such, she tied her hair differently, pulling it all into a ponytail in order to avoid getting her hair in the food or the pots. After all, she was the best cook in the army, and it would be a shame if she sullied her reputation by allowing a pink or blue strand of hair to get in the soup.

Flannel refocused his gaze from the snow to his partner, and gaped. "Your eyes!"

"Yes?"

"Well, I mean, you always wear your hair one side of your face, so I always wondered what was underneath."

"Haha. You probably think it's funny, right? Probably thought that Pieri had a missing eye or something. Well, she doesn't!" The cavalier huffed, and broke eye contact. "Are you making fun of Pieri? Do you wanna get stabbed?"

"It's a little surprising, but I'm not trying to make fun of you." Flannel insisted, picking up the rag again. He wiped down one of the tables for a moment or so before continuing. "I think your eyes are pretty."

She blinked, a bit surprised. Her irises were dissimilar, the one that was always revealed was a bloody red color, and the one that was always hidden was a startling shade of green. The verdant hue reminded Flannel of the emeralds in the mine, or the grass outside.

Pieri was not self-conscious about her mismatching eye colors. No, she rather liked it, but had a habit of covering it up when her bangs were down. For the mess hall shift, she had to pull the mass of blue and pink back, and Pieri also made a point of clipping her bangs up as well. It was a pleasant surprise, knowing that her companion actually liked her temporary new look.

She smiled. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

The garou continued his work, sighing over the wet rags and soap. Pieri helped him, opting to take care of the chairs and benches while Flannel worked on the tables themselves. They cleaned in tandem, arms outreaching in similar strokes. There were times where their elbows bumped together, or they shoved into each other by accident. Each time something like that happened, Pieri would look up and see Flannel's stubborn face, and he would mutter an apology between his lips. Those lips were so chapped these days, and there always seemed to be decorated with cuts and bruises for some reason. She also noticed his eyes and how they seemed so much kinder than before, crimson and violence and all. There was a new air about him, more to him than his usual scent, which was so comforting and dark because it reminded Pieri of all the things she loved.

It reminded her of bloodshed, murder, and terror. But those seemed understated in the essence of a new aura, something that was much more benevolent and loving, but no less fervent or forceful. Skimming underneath the surface of bloodlust and obstinacy was desire and happiness. Pieri could tell, because those were the same feelings that she had started developing herself. She could not tell if they were true emotions, or simply fragmented versions of what her heart used to be.

Because her heart and mind were fractured and split into thousands of pieces the moment her mother was killed. And she wallowed and wallowed until the only thing she could do was pick up those pieces, and use them to carve out eyes and stab through chests.

Flannel had told her that the shards of what she used to be was pretty, and he never once showed her the same resentment or misunderstanding that other people tend to show. A simple bond between them was all it took for her to see herself in a new light.

The thought of being happy and the feeling of desire could easily coincide, along with ferocity and violence. Yes, within Flannel, Pieri noticed a new balance between monster he was, and the human he was becoming. She wondered if it was possible for her to find that same balance, if she could combine her broken pieces to create something new. Something that would bring her trauma and her sense together into one messed up, beautiful entity. Because like Flannel, Pieri wanted to find the line between happiness and despair, yet she wondered if she was even capable of such a thing.

When she looked at him, however, she already knew her answer. But those affirmations were buried deep within, and she stayed silent throughout the duration of the shift. The only sounds that were audible were the wringing of rags, and the dripping of water that Pieri could not help but equate to the sweet sound of spilled blood.

...

Orochi sighed in frustration. Today was the quite possibly one of the most miserable days of her life. All day, her fortunes were not only averted, but completely wrong as the opposite effect had happened. Hinata was supposed to conquer his greatest foe, but was instead nearly killed in battle when unexpected reinforcements arrived. Setsuna was supposed to be trap-free, but fell into a new record of traps in a single day. She insisted that it was meant to be, but Orochi knew better. Not to mention that Belka was destined to find great fortune, but ended up losing all of her pocket money in a scrap.

The worst of it was Asama. Orochi had finally foreseen great disaster in his future, but instead the monk had the misfortune of hitting the lottery, and succeeding in obtaining Elfie's heart as well. The diviner predicted his tears and agony, not his sudden milk money or new wife.

When he appeared before her, she could not help but groan defeatedly. His smile said it all, and Orochi had the nerve to punch him, if she were not so downcast. Instead, she settled for a dismissive wave of hand, hoping to shoo him away. "Not now, Asama. Go be cynical elsewhere."

"Oho? No jokes? No spells to curse the daylights out of me? Strange, Orochi. Have the Gods somehow replaced the you I know with some lackluster copy?"

"No," she deadpanned, rolling her eyes. "What, can't a retainer have a bad day? Especially the retainer who has seen the future and what it holds."

"Retainers are discouraged from anything that could detract from their duty in protecting their master." Asama said. "But in your case, I suppose it's alright."

She winced at his words. They were not as straightforward as usual, but she knew their intent. Of course, the heretic had been referring to Lady Mikoto, and her death had left Orochi without a true purpose in the world of retainers. For her to be called out on that misfortune, however, was harsh. More harsh than she should have been able to tolerate.

But what was the point of pretending? Especially when the monk could see through her so easily.

"I have no idea what Elfie sees in you," she insisted. "You're inhumanely cruel, Asama."

"Elfie and I have a shared philosophy. We both want to protect each other and the ones that we deem important. The fact that we love each other is an asides," he explained. "But, I don't mean to speak of the queen's name in vain. You're terrible and shrew, Orochi, but no one loved Queen Mikoto like you did. I'm sure that she would disapprove of your sighing and eye rolling, however."

"Ha. You, loving someone? If that's the case, then why is it so hard for me?" she chided, narrowing her eyes. "Of course, Lady Mikoto would probably scold me. She would say that I knew better or something. But the truth is that I haven't learned anything about love since then."

"Probably because you're so stubborn and you like to play with people's feelings," Asama answered, voice too cheery for Orochi's liking. "But it must be serious! What poor soul has the misfortune of being your object of affection?"

"Shut up," Orochi sneered. "Like I would tell you of all people."

"Why wouldn't you? Unless it's me you've fallen in love with, and in that case I can't help but laugh! Poor you, falling in love with a married man. Scandalous!"

"You pig-head! Of course it's not you. Married or not, you're the last man I want to fall in love with."

"Ouch. I'm hurting, really, I am. But if you don't want to get that monkey off your back, it's no harm done to me. You can wallow in your self pity all you want!" Asama smiled. "But if you keep lazing around you'll probably never get Nishiki to love you back."

She covered her mouth, eyes widening. "W-What? How did you know it was Nishiki?!"

"I didn't!" Asama cheered. "Honestly, I just came up with the first name I could think of. But, seriously? You're in love with Nishiki?"

Orochi stomped her foot, face reddening in embarrassment. "You dirty little sneak! You tricked me! But now you know, so it doesn't even matter. Yes, Asama, I'm in love with Nishiki. There. Just run off and tell him, why don't you?"

"Ha! How funny! But I'm not going to tell him. I think if you love him, that's something you have to tell him yourself! Are you so selfish, Orochi, that you would dump that responsibility on someone else?"

Her lavender eyes were narrowed. "I'm not selfish. And I wasn't going to leave that to anyone, I just figured you would have told him because you just love teasing me."

"I do love teasing you," he admitted, "but it's obviously so much more agonizing for you to tell him yourself! So I'll keep my mouth shut for now!"

"Just go away," she sighed out. "You're making things worse."

"Possibly. But if there's one thing I know about Nishiki, it's that he's clueless. He wouldn't really know how someone felt about him unless they showed him. So if you don't show him or tell him, he'll never know. Then, the war will end and he'll go back to his village and you'll never see him again!"

"...Asama..."

"But, that's enough for today. I would love to stay and watch you get torn up inside, but I am married and I should spend my time with the one person that means something to me. Good day, Orochi."

The monk gave a lasting smile, before turning his back on the diviner. She watched his silly outline walk farther away from him, burning her stare into his back like she wanted it to set on fire. But he remained flame-free as he disappeared, and that left Orochi to herself. She slumped down against the wall, burying her face in her hands.

As terrible as Asama was, she knew he was right. She had to tell Nishiki how she felt about him, before it was too late. Even if he did not feel the same way about her, or even if he secretly detested her, Orochi had to make it clear where she stood emotionally.

And that, she though, is the most unpredictable misfortune I've ever had to bear.

...

Flannel had to tell Nishiki he loved him. He had never said those words to anyone before, not even his family, because he hated being truthful and bearing more of his emotions than what was necessary. But if it was for Nishiki, then a few simple words of affection and truth were necessary.

Because Nishiki was so honest and compassionate, Flannel knew he deserved more than just a confession. And he loved it when they kissed or touched, it drove him wild when he felt Nishiki's burning skin and warm lips,when he felt the cold scrape of his fangs. He loved it, but he never said it, and he wanted even more.

He wanted more.

How would he go about telling him, then? Would he say 'Hi I love you let's go fuck now' or 'Gods you make me feel like the morning is worth waking up to' or 'you're better than anything in my collection and twice as pretty' or 'hey can I take your shirt off but like in a way where we're still cool' or 'I've never felt this way about anyone before' or 'I don't want to know what life will be like without you' or 'My head is so loud and when you kiss me it's quiet and I can hear the universe around us and your heartbeat is like a drum and I love every minute of it'?

There was no way of knowing which approach would work, if any, but Flannel could not hesitate any longer. There was nothing that kept their bond permanent and private, and there was no telling if someone or another wanted Nishiki's heart the same way Flannel did. If he did not make a move, he would lose his chance forever.

And the garou would never forgive himself if he let the light of his life slip through his fingers like the fading sunshine he was.

...

Orochi had to tell Nishiki she loved him. She knew it, Asama knew it, and if she told her best friend Kagerou, she would probably know it, too. Orochi threw her words around so casually that most people could not really tell if she was being serious or not. But Gods, she loved the fox boy and his kind smile and warm skin. She loved his fur, his eyes, and his hands, especially when they brushed against hers.

She loved his honesty and good attitude, even if she was dishonest and petty herself. She loved it when he greeted her 'hello', or talked to her, or even walked next to her. Orochi could not handle it when he would lean in, speak closely in her ears, or ruffle the strands of her violet hair. It drove her wild and it made her heart thrum uncontrollably.

She wanted more.

How would she tell him, then? Would she say 'I'm sorry for everything I've done but I love you so much' or 'Gods I can't believe I'm saying this but I think I love you' or 'The nights get lonely and I feel better when I think about you' or 'Let me repay you for your unending kindness' or 'I'll do anything to be a part of your life forever' or 'I don't know what love is can you teach me' or 'My head is empty and bare but when you're near me it's so loud and the universe is quiet and my heartbeat is still and it's like I want to die and live at the same time'?

Nothing that she thought of seemed appropriate, but an indecent answer was still better than none at all. She knew that there had to be someone else out there that loved the youko the way she did, and if she held back she would never have a chance to tell him in full.

And the diviner would never forgive herself if she let Nishiki slip through her fingers, which were as cold and icy as the moon.

...

The day passed on. The snow had not stopped, and the fields were drowned in mountains of white. Nishiki sat under a tree, watching the ice drift down to the surface. He caught a few snowflakes inside his tongue, and laughed when they melted.

It was so fun and so beautiful. He felt as if he could stay in that white wonderland forever, and forget about anything else in his life. Or, at the very least, he could lose himself in the splendor momentarily, and in that small fraction of time he would not be Nishiki of the youko hamlet anymore. No, he would be Nishiki of the snow, the sunshine boy in the nighttime ice.

Everything that ever worried him would disappear, if only for a moment.

He thought about sleeping in the snow, until a soft voice called out to him.

"Nishiki...?"

He opened one eye, and saw a hesitant figure standing over him. There was fear in a set of bright eyes, and anxiety in the movement of slender hands. More noticeable, however, was the rise and fall of the chest, which was erratic and shaky.

"Orochi," he greeted, smiling softly. "Wanna take a nap with me?"

She shook her head, pointing to the heavy winter coat she had on. "It's snowing, remember?"

"Oh, right. I forget sometimes." The fox stood up and stretched, yawning lazily as he did so. "Is something wrong? It's pretty cold for the humans right now, so you should probably get inside."

The diviner sighed and averted her eyes to the ground. "Well, it is cold, but that's not the problem here."

Nishiki smiled. "You can tell me anything, y'know! What's on your mind?"

"That's exactly it, Nishiki. Nothing is on my mind as of lately."

"Uh," he tilted his head, obviously confused. "Isn't that impossible? You can't just not think about anything!"

"No!" She suddenly yelled, burying her face into her hands. "No, no! Gods, you're all but dense sometimes. Nishiki, what I mean is..." Orochi took another deep breath, swallowing the fear that was stuck inside her throat. She peeked between the spaces in her fingers, and looked up at the youko.

He could not have made things any more worse than he did. His eyes were worried and kind, and out of concern he brought the diviner closer to him, ignoring her sudden yelps as she found herself pressed against him, her face buried in his sweet-smelling shirt. Nishiki rubbed the top of her head, pressing his face into it so he could kiss her hair.

"It's okay, you don't need to be so afraid. It's just me, y'know! Like I said," he took her hands, holding them in his own with such naivety and good will, "you can tell me anything!"

Her face was burning with embarrassment, and her hands were tingling with the intimacy of being held in his own. She stared up, and found nothing but comfort and familiarity in his sunny eyes.

She felt safe. A small smile appeared on her face. "Nishiki...what I meant is...!"

It's now or never, she thought, Oh Gods, steer me right.

Before the fox could speak again, the diviner had already leaned forward, rising on her toes to give herself more height. In a swift, soft movement, she pressed her lips onto his. He yelped in surprise, backing away but finding himself pushed against the tree he was just resting under. Nishiki was trapped between the amorous diviner and the cherry tree, and figured that it was just as well.

She was so naive. Her eyes were shut closed, as if she did not want to see his face, and her lips were soft and warm but hesitant, as if they had never traversed onto another set of lips before. Her breath was hot and smelled like jasmine and mochi, and her scent was so familiar, but felt new and strange in Nishiki's nose. She was like paper and ink and silk, rolled up into one sweet smell.

It was endearing, it was cute, but it was wrong. And a moment or so passed when Orochi realized that he was not kissing her back.

She pulled away, and there were tears in her eyes. Nishiki was wordless for once, and could only stare sympathetically, worriedly. No, she thought, no no no no. Oh Gods, what did I just do?

She backed away, and covered her mouth with both of her hands, tears spilling over. "Oh Gods," she muttered, "Nishiki, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have just...! I didn't mean to...I...!"

"Orochi..."

"Oh, I'm unbelievable," she cried out, sobbing into her hands. "I'm such an fool! I feel like so juvenile, w-what was I thinking?" Her words were lost in a heap of tears, voice cracking down underneath its own weight.

Nishiki felt an unbearable tear in his chest, like his heart was rendering itself. He felt awkward and ashamed, like this was somehow his fault, and it probably was. All this time, he realized that his words and movements were so promising, such that he unintentionally lead her on.

He stepped forward, and brought a feather-light kiss to Orochi's cheek. She choked on her sobs, and looked up at him.

"Orochi, I'm the fool. I shouldn't have been leading you on like that. Or, or whatever I was doing, I didn't want you to think that I...that I loved you. I like you, Orochi, I think you're really nice and you've been good to me, but I don't...think of you in that way."

"Y-Yeah, I could tell when you didn't kiss me back," she joked dryly. "But I see it now. Y-You love someone else, don't you?"

His lips twitched, but eventually curled up in a grin, and he nodded fervently. "I do. I love someone else."

"I see. I'm so sorry, Nishiki. All the trouble I've caused you, and all the tricks I played on you, only to confess that I-I love you..." She laughed in spite of herself. "I'm really...no good, am I?"

"That's not true," he insisted. "Yeah, you're a handful, but you're plenty good. You're better."

She wanted to cry again, but simply nodded along. "Thank you, Nishiki. C-Can I ask you something...?"

"Yes?"

"C-Can I just...kiss you, one last time? Then I can leave this all behind."

"Orochi..."

"Please? Just a small kiss, it doesn't even have to be on the lips."

"...Oh, fine." He gave in, and leaned a bit forward so as to accommodate her height. She giggled in spite of herself, and reached forward to plant a kiss on his cheek. Her touch was feather-light as her lips brushed the surface of his face. Nishiki could not help but smile.

Orochi pulled back, but stared up at him still. One more, she thought, because I'll never be able to do this again.

Against her own word, the diviner shot forward, and pushed her lips onto his again. He yelped, pressing his arms to her shoulders to try and ease her off, but she persisted. Her lips were awkward and hot as she tried to match their shape into his, but he fiercely tried to keep his own mouth closed and his lips pursed, but Orochi's sudden strength bubbled up, and he found himself against the cherry tree again. It was quick, it was forceful, and it was over before Nishiki could even yell at her or shove her off.

He never got a chance to, however. He heard something drop, and make a plop sound in the snow. Horrified, he turned his gaze in tandem with Orochi, and the two of them gawked.

It was Flannel, and his eyes were red and wide and full of unbridled emotions. Anger, sadness, confusion, frustration, hurt. It was all over his face, in his brows, lips, nose, and cheeks. It was in his mouth which stood agape, and his hands which started trembling badly. They shook and shook, until they stilled in the form of a clutched fist, until his mouth closed into a nasty sneer, until his eyes narrowed and there was only one emotion left in them.

Anger.

"Sorry," the wolf hissed through his teeth. "Sorry that I ever thought I meant something to you!"

"Flannel, wait!"

Nishiki's voice was lost in the flurry of the snow. Flannel did not care, however, as he ran as far away from the two of them as he possibly could. His tears were hot and angry, and slid down his face and fell into the snow, dampening the flakes. His face was contorted into a sneer, an expression of unbearable pain and betrayal. It was all because of Flannel's possessiveness, seeing as that anything he treasured was automatically thought to be his. Nishiki was his friend, his love, and only he was allowed the sweet surrender that were his kisses. It was impossible for Flannel to think that Nishiki to ever belonged to anyone else.

But the impossible had become reality, as it seemed that Nishiki was apparently preoccupied with a dangerous little sneak, a devious snake with amethyst eyes and tantalizing curves.

And her name was Orochi.

...

The snow had stopped falling, and the sun was shining through the clouds. But it felt pale and cold on Orochi's skin, and she was as still as a statue. The world around her was stagnant, and not the sound of clinking swords nor loud chatter could deter her.

Not even the sound of her best friend, Kagerou, whose stealthy mannerisms allowed her to be beside the diviner unnoticed. She was silent for a moment, and only spoke out when Orochi finally acknowledged her presence.

"Asama told me that you were going to see about talking to Nishiki. I had no idea you liked him, but as your friend, I support your endeavors wholeheartedly. I'm guessing you saw him already?"

"..."

"Orochi?"

"Kagerou, I saw him already." She murmured out, voice bland and emotionless. "I saw him."

"And?"

She looked up, lilac eyes brimming with tears and sadness. Yet her lips were curled into a smile.

"He loves someone else."

"Oh, I'm sorry. At least you got to tell him." The ninja sat down next to Orochi and brought her closer to her with an easy stroke of hand. "No matter how it turned out, I promise you that it's not the worse thing that could have happened."

"No," Orochi denied, and buried her face into Kagerou's shoulder. "No, you don't understand. The way it turned out was the worst possible thing that could have happened. I kissed him, I shouldn't have, and I forced myself on him again. I said I wouldn't but I just...! I lied and I went in for another kiss."

"Orochi..."

"And I shouldn't have, you know why?" She laughed bitterly, voice tremulous and hoarse. "Because when I kissed him again, the person that he liked was there. And I saw it in his eyes, the way he was so hurt, because he was in love with Nishiki too, although he had no idea that I would have complicated things. He probably thought we were in love or something, because he had no idea that Nishiki had just rejected me."

"..."

"And he ran off, and then Nishiki chased after him, because he loves him. He really loves him, because he would never chase after me that way. And I haven't felt this bad since Lady Mikoto left me, too. Gods, Kagerou, is everyone I love going to leave me? Or am I just going to push them away?" She sobbed. "I just push them all away and it's my fault."

Kagerou shook her head, and pulled Orochi into a full embrace. She tightened her arms around her, and dug her face into her shoulder. The normally taciturn ninja felt sorrow now more than ever, and whispered out words of sincerity.

"That's silly, Orochi. You don't push out everyone you love."

"What do you mean?"

"You don't push out everyone you love," she repeated, squeezing her hands around her tighter, "because I'm still here."

And Orochi broke out into tears, because for the first time in a long time, she felt genuinely happy that the future was still unpredictable, because it would mean that there was a possibility for forgiveness.

The sun was shining again, and Orochi felt warm.

Please, Gods, she prayed, staring up into the sky whilst hugging Kagerou, Please listen to my wish.

Please don't let Nishiki and Flannel suffer for my selfishness.

Please.