A/N: Okay, so my friend asked me why I said 'characters from famous love stories' but The Great Gatsby is not a love story. If you haven't read it, check it out. Love is actually a pretty big theme in it. A translation-milaya means 'dear' in Russian. So when Anya first saw Anna Karenina, Anna said, "Anya, dear, don't worry so!" Anyways, Valjean's Soliloquy (changed to Anya's), Come What May and On My Own do not belong to me. Enjoy.
Anya stands here, but now everything is different. The wind whips her hair all around her face as she straightens her black dressing gown. She realizes that she is on a ship-at the bow-that moves faster with every moment-first breaking sound, then light, finally she is moving so fast she cannot feel anything at all. Anya doesn't know where she is, but from what she can tell, it is just after the sun has set and right before the moon appears. She is alone, but the ship is still moving. Anya looks behind her nervously, but everything is a blur behind, to the left, to the right. So Anya looks ahead. Just out of reach, her orb bounces in front of her, taunting her. Far off in the distance, but approaching in rapid clarity, a dark shore-the night. A train whistles far off in the distance, and she strains to attempt to see it. However, until Anya reaches that shore, she will beat on, faster, stretching her arms farther...always and forever.
THE NEXT DAY, 3RD PERSON POV
"Have you got a name for him?" Anya questioned as she caught her breath. Raoul shook his head. "No, we haven't. Any ideas?" Anya pursed her lips and thought. She looked around to see if her vanishing friends were there to perhaps give her an idea. Then it came to her, and Satine nodded at her in approval from behind Raoul.
"Chocolat?"
Raoul cocked his head. "Why Chocolat? It's a lovely name, but why?" Looking at the brown horse before her and Raoul, Anya remembered why Le Chocolat was one of her favorite Moulin Rouge characters, despite only having about 3 lines or so. Le Chocolat was essentially Satine's older brother. He caught her when she fell out of the swing, he saved her from the Duke, and he tried to help her run away with Christian afterwards. Anya could not explain it, but somehow she saw the character embodied inside the horse-in the background, but always there to lend a hand if needed.
"Well, he's brown, first of all. Second, remember the play I told you about?" Both Anya and Raoul looked around to make sure Christine wasn't there before Raoul responded, "The one at the Rouge?" "Yes, that one. There was a character in it-one who was always in the background. But he was like Satine's protector for when Christian wasn't allowed to see her. When she fell out of the swing, he was there to catch her. His name-or at least, his stage name-was Le Chocolat." "After an honorable man, I suppose?" "Yes." They walked silently out of the barn where the horses were and were soon back at the house.
Christine handed Anya a small mewing Siamese kitten as soon as they entered. "Why, who's this?" Anya asked with a smile, stroking the kitten's ears. "One of Eponine and Marius's kittens," Raoul replied. (A/N: WHAT? Check my profile. I hardcore ship Marius and Eponine.) "Oh, how many are there?" "7." "Awwww...have you named her?" "No, do you have any ideas?" Anya thought again. "How about Ayesha?" Christine smiled. "That's lovely." "Anya, you have a talent for naming things. You can have her," Raoul said with a smile. Anya smiled brightly. "Really?" "Of course." "Oh, thank you! But..." Anya stroked Ayesha's fur. "I have a friend who would take care of her much more than I ever could." Raoul was then called by one of the servants-a horse was looking sick-so he left Anya and Christine alone.
Christine sighed girlishly. "Madly in love, I see," Anya clicked her tongue. "Being in love is a wonderful thing...Anya, have you ever been in love?" Anya smirked playfully. She couldn't tell of Erik. "It depends on which love you're talking about." "So that is a yes?" "Maybe." "It's a yes." "Don't question it."
NEXT DAY, ANYA POV
Christmas Eve at last! Everybody is in a good mood, the wine flows freely, and, unfortunately, there is mistletoe EVERYWHERE. It's pretty hard walking around with your head in the air. After dodging some attempts for a kiss, I hide myself behind a column, giggling.
"What do you see in her?" I hear Claude's voice ask, the words then being chorused by other men. I instantly grow silent and strain my ears. GOSSIP. "I suppose I shall start from the very beginning," Piangi replies. I hear the sound of someone drinking, and then a bottle being put down.
"It all began a very long time ago. As you know, Carlotta's mother is also an opera singer and her father is an influential politician." Carlotta's dad's a politician? Huh. Explains a lot. "They wanted a perfect little daughter, if not a son. At a young age, she was taught that tears were weakness. And that weakness is always met with pain." I stiffen and can barely hear the men listening to Piangi say or do anything. "Carlotta was taught to be superior, to look down on everyone else, for it was what her parents did as well. If she acted that way, she was rewarded-not with love or affection, but with lifeless toys." I bite my lip and hang my head. It was never her fault. And now I've frightened her even more, I suppose. Abruptly and silently, I walk off and go to my dressing room to get my blue-and white cape to match my blue and white dress. I must take a day trip. I think back on all I've done. The shame I felt about getting completely wasted and making out with Erik is nothing compared to this.
As I walk quickly and surely to Carlotta's, I sing-
What have I done?
Sweet Jesus, what have I done?
Become a demon in the night
Become a fox on the run
And I have fallen so far
And is the hour so late?
That nothing remains but the cry of my hate!
The cries in the dark that nobody hears
Here's where I stand at the turning of the years?
If there's another way to go
There isn't, I'm stuck here, over a hundred years ago!
My life is a war that can never be won
They put me in a new world and murdered Anya
When they put me in the catacombs and left me for dead
But I adapted and made someone else feel dread!
I feel so horrid! She's been tortured her whole life, the only things that give her respite are Piangi, her poodle, singing, and bossing people around. And I've come along and become the real monster. She is does not deserve this, and yet almost everyone thinks she does! I catch my breath. 3 blocks away now. I must calm down. I take a deep breath and continue walking-
What spirit came to move my life?
Is there another way to go?
I am reaching, but I fall
And the night is coming in
And I stare into the void
To the whirlpool of my sin
I'll escape now from this world
From the world of the tormenter Anya Oyen
The tormentor Anya Oyen is nothing now
Another story must begin!
I round a corner and then take 3 steps back. Carlotta. We stand here on the street, looking at each other. Obvious fear is in her eyes. I have half a mind to slap her in the face, but then I remember why I have come and hang my head, crossing my hands behind my back. This is going to be hard. Why do apologies look so easy when you see other people doing it or when people apologize to you? No, wait. I know why the 2nd one happens. It seems so easy and simple because they succumb to your view. You think it is easy because they go with how you see an issue. However, it is a very vulnerable time.
"I am sorry," I mutter.
I hear her breath catch. "What?" she whispers. Why do I hang my head? I must face the pain in the eye. No pun intended. I straighten up and have gray eyes meet brown. "I am sorry," I say strongly. When she just continues to stare at me in shock, I keep going. "I am sorry for making a fool out of you in front of everybody. I am sorry for every single little thing I have done to ever hurt you. You do not have to forgive me." My God, I suck at this. She opens her mouth slightly to say something as a new look enters her eyes, but then looks up at the sky. I follow her lead.
Snow.
It falls upon us in big fat flakes. Somehow, it takes the tension that I have been feeling, leading up to this moment of vulnerability-away. It is gone. I exhale, once, twice. Carlotta does the same, and then I follow her gaze.
2 small street rat boys, several pigeons, and bread in a baker's window. These objects seem extraterrestrial. Everything slows-the snowfall included; the two boys run after the pigeons and the black-haired one smiles up at me; the pigeons take to the air among the snowfall; and to tickle our noses comes the scent of the fresh bread. It all seems so beautiful, so other-wordly, this small, insignificant moment in time. It takes my breath away, and I hear Carlotta say quietly-
"I-a forgive you."
I turn to her and smile-a real smile, not one of my Bond smirks. Everything speeds up again as she looks at me oddly and then smiles back-a real smile as well. She has a odd little smile, but it makes her look much less like a harpy. Then her face changes. "Look-a out!" She pushes me to the side and screams in the face of a masked man, who, I suppose, was trying to mug me. The man grabs his ears and stumbles away. "Thanks," I breathe once he is gone. "Don't-a bother." Then Carlotta looks at me with concern. "You-a be careful. People with-a masks cannot-a be-a trusted."(PRINCESS BRIDE!) A cold feeling runs through my veins and then Carlotta goes out of focus-everything around her and her herself shines with a bright white light, and then everything goes back to normal. "Thank you again," I say as she and I start to walk away. "So, how is your poodle?"
NEXT DAY, ABOUT 6 IN THE MORNING, ANYA POV
"Shh, Ayesha," I mutter as I quietly tiptoe into Erik's lair. He won't be awake yet. It's way too early in the morning. I just want to leave Ayesha here and go without awkwardness. The siamese kitten has a red ribbon around her neck and I put her in a small black basket with a red cloth.
Silently, I place the basket right near the music box, so it'll be the first thing Erik sees when he wakes up. I turn to him to make sure he hasn't gotten up. He sleeps without his mask on. He looks...kinda...oh alright, I'll say it. HE LOOKS ADORABLE. His face isn't all tensed up, and he actually looks relaxed. His face looks like bacon, I remember Sebastian saying with a laugh when we were going all Rifftrax on the movie. It sort of does, Satine says as she and I walk out of his room quietly. "But bacon is delicious," I reply before my eyes widen and I slap a hand over my mouth in red-hot shame. Satine giggles. You would know. "Shut your face," I grumble, adjusting the headband Meg gave me (in return for perfume).
Something catches my eye as I step into my corridor. Oh. There's my own private green lighthouse, blinking away over Erik's organ. Seeing it so much, I've learned that where it blinks, I ought to go, so I step cautiously over and reach out to touch it. As usual, it bounces away, so I pout and prepare to walk back out. I then hear a loud yawn, a loud purr, and then Erik say sleepily, "What's this?" Damn, it's too late. In resolution of my fate, I plop myself down at the organ and stare into the flame of a candle. Hopefully this will be brief.
WHY ARE YOU COMPLAINING? I turn around and see Gatsby. More time with him, old sport. "But...it's...AWKWARD!" I hiss. Just be glad for him. It's Christmastime, old sport, lighten up! I snarl in annoyance, but then let Gatsby's words sink in. It'll be nice. I hope.
ERIK POV
The kitten is so small. She fits easily into the palms of my hands. I smile in the direction of my curtains. Is Anya still outside? I have something for her.
I step out and look around before my eyes land on the back of her head. She sits upright, back to me, at my organ. She wears a white-and-silver dress and a headband with a lotus flower on it. "Anya?" I call. She turns immediately, a bright smile on her face. "I see you've found Ayesha," she says as I walk towards her. "That's a lovely name," I reply, reaching her and putting the hand that's not holding Ayesha on her shoulder. "Ah!" Anya flinches. "Is something wrong?" "Oh-uh, your hand is cold." "I'm sorry." I say stupidly as I sit down on the bench next to Anya. No, no-ugh! Ayesha crawls out of my hand and jumps onto the keys. We watch her, smiling for a few moments. I then remember what I have for Anya and take the small black box out of my pocket.
"Anya?" "Hmm?" She turns to me with an eyebrow raised. When her eyes land on the box, they widen visibly and her face goes paler-or is it simply my imagination? No, no, she's not interpreting it like that! I open the box, and her face relaxes. "Erik, it's beautiful! Thank you so much!" Anya takes the necklace out of the box. It's a thin, delicate gold chain with a single diamond hanging from the center. She gives me another hug and murmurs, "Merry Christmas, Erik." "Merry Christmas, Anya," I reply, hugging her back. "Erik, I want you to know two things." "What?" She smiles. "Even if the whole, entire world is made up of complete and utter jerks, and that there is no soul in the world to care for people like you, know that I'll always be here. Always and forever..."
She puts on the necklace while humming a small, beautiful tune under her breath. "What's that you're humming?" I ask, picking Ayesha up and off the keys. "Oh-um, the other song I can play on the organ." "Play it for me?" I ask. Like the last time, she tenses. Unlike the last time, her head swivels to the left, away from me, and I see her mouth in annoyance, Oh, alright! Fine! She closes her eyes, bows her head, and begins to play.
"Never knew...I could feel like this...Like I've never seen...the sky...be-fore...want to vanish...inside your kiss...everyday, I love you more, and more." As she sings, her head lifts up until her face is to the ceiling of my cavern, a small smile on her face. "Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing? Telling me, to give you...EVERYTHING!" Her eyes open, and the smile widens. "Seasons may change, winter to spring...but..." Her eyes land on me-but do I dream again? "I love you, until the end...of...time!" If her eyes had been on me, now they're back on the keys. "Come what may, come what may! I will love you, until my dying day!" I snap out of my trance. She is not singing to you!
"Suddenly the world, seems like such a perfect grace...suddenly, it moves...with such a per-fect grace..." "Suddenly, my life doesn't seem such a waste!" we sing together. Anya's head snaps to me and her eyes are huge. Oh God, I'm doing everything all wrong! She looks at me once more before going back to singing. "It all revolves around you...And there's no mountain too high, no river too wide! Sing out this song, and I'll be there by your side! Storm clouds may gather, and stars may collide...but I love you, until the end of time!" NOT SINGING TO YOU. NOT SINGING TO YOU-Her head turns to me as she plays and she smiles brightly-nervous, but bright.
"Come what may, come what may! I will love you! Until my dy-ing day, oh, come what may, come what may...I will love you-" "I will love you," I sing softly, unsure. Anya's smile grows brighter and her eyes sparkle like the diamond on her necklace encouragingly. I smile in return, the nervousness gone. "Suddenly," I sing, "the world seems like such a perfect place..." We both turn our heads to the keys and sing together-
Come what may!
Come what may!
I will love you
Until my dying day!
Anya and I let out one loud breath together, and then she looks at me-is that hope in her eye? Or is it simple teasing? No. It isn't teasing. I...I do not know what to say or do. "W-what did you think?" She asks, breathless. Relief courses through my veins. She just wants to know about the song. Not the fact that I...I clear my throat.
"It's a lovely song, Anya."
Immediately, her eyes lose the sparkle but the smile stays on, weary. "An-anything else?" Ayesha gets back on the keys and I watch her, avoiding Anya's gaze. "Ought there be?" I blurt. Nothing but silence in response, and then a loud BANG! I jump. Anya has banged her head on the organ. "Anya...?" I ask, confused. Abruptly, she stands up and simply stares into my eyes, hers cold and mine confused. Suddenly, her eyes soften and she begins to walk away. "I'll see you at the Masquerade, I suppose?" "Yes..." "That's," she looks over her shoulder at me with ice in her eyes "simply lovely, Erik." "Anya, wa-wait!" I exclaim as she almost reaches her passage. She looks over her shoulder again, eyes now questioning. "Thank you." She gives me a watery smile and vanishes into her passageway.
ANYA POV, THAT NIGHT
I wander the streets in Erik's brown coat over my white and silver dress, going nowhere in particular. I'm still in a daze about Erik's obliviousness. Even my four friends reacted like I did when he simply said it was a lovely song-Levin began to bang his head on the wall in frustration; Satine started hissing and gesturing wildly; Anna fell flat on her face; and Gatsby's jaw hit the floor.
I thought he was a genius of some sort! Gatsby rants. I'm really questioning his intelligence, Satine grumbles. You would've thought, after trying to woo a girl using a very close technique, he would've known when someone loves him! Anna cries. I am starting to seriously doubt him, Levin adds. I sigh and turn from them. "Well, do any of you know what I ought to do now?" No response. I turn wildly. They've gone again, and my light isn't here either. Tears start to well in my eyes.
And now I'm all alone again, nowhere to turn no one to go to!
Without a heart, without a friend, without a face to say hello to
And now the night is near...and I can make believe he's here...
Sometimes I walk alone at night when everybody else is sleeping
I think of him, and then I'm happy with the company I'm keeping
This city goes to bed, and I can live inside my head
On my own, pretending he's beside me
All alone, I walk with him 'till morning
Without him, I feel his arms around me
And when I lose my way I open my eyes, and he's found me
And I know, it's only in my mind
That I'm talking to myself and not to him
And though I now know that he's blind
Still I say, there's a way for us
I love him, but every day I'm learning
All this time, I've only been pretending
Without him, my world will stop turning
A world that's full of happiness that he's never known!
"I love him," I breathe. "I love him...I love him...but only on my own." It is as if my fate is sealed. It is official. Romantic love from Erik is not to be had. I wrap my coat around myself for a moment, reminding myself of everything that I have done and the hope I felt for love, before I tear off the coat and leave it in a heap on the street. There are as many loves as there are hearts, but one cannot always get the one they work the hardest for.
A/N: The full impact has not hit yet...Ayesha does not belong to me, she belongs to Susan Kay. I own nothing but the plot and Anya. Since I pre-wrote most of the next chapter, I'll probably have it up sooner than this one. Also, remember how in the summary I said 'reasons that will be explained later'? That reason will be updated as I put up Chapter 13. Thank you for reading, and please tell me what you think!
