Secrets Untold
I stare off into space, the following morning at breakfast. For the second time this year, I sit at the Ravenclaw table, agreeing to eat breakfast with Jason. I tug at my lip with my fingers, my eyes trailing over to the Gryffindor table. How had I not seen it before? I frown, trying to remember hard the last few weeks- however, I don't remember much involving Alex and Fred. Have I really been that self involved?
I recall the train to Hogwarts at the beginning of the year, and how Fred had looked like he wanted to say something to me before James and Alex came in. Maybe he wanted to admit he's been snogging my brother? I feel stupid at the thought- I had a crush on Fred, and while I did, he probably had a major crush on my brother. Merlin, that's a weird situation to be in.
I wonder why Alex hasn't told me he's gay. Perhaps it's why he's been distant lately. Is he afraid I'll judge him? I know a lot of people don't accept gays, for some reason, but Alex is my brother. I love him, even if he does annoy me half the time. I would never turn my back on him because he's gay.
"You don't actually have to sit with us," Jason says, following my gaze to the Gryffindor table.
"What?" I look at him, surprised. I had been so involved in my thoughts that I forgot where I am. "Oh. No. Sorry, I was thinking about something." I smile at him. "I want to sit with you, anyway."
Jason looks pleased at this, his eyes twinkling. "So, up for some training tonight?" he asks me.
"Yeah, of course," I reply, eating my breakfast.
"It'll just be the two of us," he tells me, looking at me with a grin, and a suggestive look.
I feel my face grow warm, part of me wanting to flirt back with him, the other part feeling too embarrassed to even flirt with my own boyfriend. I shove his chest, and he laughs, probably at how red my face is.
"You get so flustered," he says. I scowl at him. "It's cute," he reassures me. My scowl disappears, but my face is still red. He gives me a quick kiss, which lightens my mood. He lifts up my hand, and looks at my watch. He pouts, which makes him look cute. "I have to go." He stands up, gathering his belongings. "You heading to class?"
I shake my head. "I have a free period," I tell him.
He kisses me again, leaving me alone at the Ravenclaw table. Again, I look towards the Gryffindor table. I notice how close Fred and Alex sit, wondering how I never noticed before. They act so casual, no one would notice unless they knew.
I watch as Alex stands up, and while he walks away, I gather my own things and Chase after him. I look at my watch- I have ten minutes to talk to him. I thought I could leave it until after classes ended, but if seems too important to leave.
"Alex!" I call, finally reaching him in the Entrance Hall. He seems to be heading out of the castle, probably for Care of Magical Creatures with Hagrid.
He swirls around, looking for the caller, until his eyes rest on me.
"Hey, Mia," he says. He's obviously not so mad with me anymore, but I still hesitate before I begin to talk with him. What if this causes him to be mad at me again?
I let out a deep breath, deciding it's now or never. "So, I was hanging out with James last night," I begin.
"You and James hung out?" he asks, looking amazed. "And you two didn't kill each other?"
"I know, right? We're sort of friends now, I guess- anyway, that's not the point," I say, shaking my head. "He mentioned that you and Fred don't seem to want him around anymore."
Alex makes a face. "That's bloody stupid," he says. "James is my best mate, of course we want him around."
"I suppose you and Fred must spend a lot of time together to make him feel this way," I suggest obviously.
Alex narrows his eyes at me, his face turning a little pale. "Mia, what's your point?"
I stare at him, and him back at me. Something in his eyes suggests to me that he just wants me to say it and get out of the way, but I also see a little fear in them too. I feel a little sad that he's afraid of my reaction.
"Alex..." I sigh. "I know about you and Fred."
Although he looked as though he was expecting this, his eyes grow in alarm. He glances around the hall, looking for anyone who might eavesdrop.
He grabs my wrist, pulling me away from everyone. "Mia, I- I didn't... I know I should have... I Should have told you, but-"
I place my hands on his shoulders, hearing the worry in his voice. "Alex," I say softly, in a voice I hope is calming. "It's okay. It's fine. I love you, no matter what, okay?"
Alex breathes a small sigh of relief. "Look, I've been trying to tell you since we got back to Hogwarts, but... It's really hard, Mia."
"I know," I answer. "There's nothing wrong with being gay, and I'm really happy for you and Fred. Honestly. Although, I can't deny I'm surprised. I mean, you and James are the two biggest flirts in the year."
"I'm not gay," he tells me, which causes me to look at him confused. "I'm bisexual. Like, I like both guys and girls." His face is pink, but I can see in his eyes how happy he is to finally tell me this. "Fred, however, is definitely gay." He grins. He looks to his own watch and then frowns. "I'm going to be late- screw it, I can skip class." He looks around again. "Can we... Talk about this in private?" he asks.
...
Alex and I head to the Viaduct, both of us deciding it's a nice place to talk, as hardly any students go through it. I wrap my scarf tightly around my neck, feeling partly relieved to be having this conversation with Alex. I wonder if he's annoyed about my bluntness- I'm terrible at talking about personal stuff with Alex lately.
If two years ago, Alex decided to tell me about his sexuality, it wouldn't have even bothered me. However, it's been awhile since we've really talked properly, just the two of us. I feel somewhat nostalgic, as if nothing has changed between us.
"I kind of figured out I like guys too, probably in third year," Alex tells me, leaning against one of the pillars. "I always thought I was... weird. But, things happened, and I eventually figured it out."
"How long have you and Fred been a thing?" I ask him curiously.
"Since the end of last year," he replies, smiling down at the ground. "We haven't told James yet. We want to, but we don't know how."
"James is pretty chill," I remind him. "He'll be happy for you guys."
Alex looks at me, his face tightened into a cold expression. "It's hard to know, you know? How people will react." He sighs. "I'm so tired of hiding this from people, Mia. I know people are more accepting these days, or so they say until they actually meet someone who's gay. Sometimes, people aren't as accepting as they claim to be."
I nod my head, knowing what he says is true. I give him a small, warm smile. "James loves you, Alex," I say gently. "Nothing will change that."
"I know," he answers, turning to stare out across the land below us. "Fred's family know. They're cool with it- and they know about us, too." I see him smile, and I join him, gazing out, watching crows soar in the distance. The wind howls, blowing my hair across my face. I tuck it behind my ears, enjoying this moment with Alex. It really has been too long.
"I notice you got two letters the other morning," I mention. "An invitation to the wedding?"
He nods his head, a smile playing on his lips. "Fred said he was going to take me, anyway. But it feels nice to be invited by Teddy and Victorie," he tells me. "All of them feel like family to me at this stage."
I feel my chest tighten in jealousy. Deciding not to mention that those words hurt my feelings, I continue on with the conversation normally. "James invited me as his plus one."
"You two getting along is probably the strangest thing ever," he laughs.
"I feel like things are changing, Alex," I say. "It's only October, and so much has already happened."
"How have you been?" he asks, turning his head to look at me. "You know, dad's anniversary is coming up soon."
"I know," I mumble. "I... I've been having the dreams again."
Alex looks immediately alarmed at this. A mixture of emotions play on his face, until finally, he just looks lost. "Why didn't you tell me?" he demands. "Or write to mum, because if I know you, you most likely haven't?" He looks a little angry. "You should have said something."
"I didn't want to bother anyone," I admit in a low voice.
He lets out a huff in response to this, looking at me in disbelief. "For a Ravenclaw, you can be quite stupid sometimes," he grumbles. "I told you before that no matter what, you can always talk to me about anything. We've only got each other and Mum, Mia."
"Yeah? Well, you have James, and Fred, and the whole Potter-Weasley family behind you," I snap, not meaning to sound so angry. "I've only got you, and Mum."
Alex narrows his eyes at me, our moods turned slightly sour by my sudden outburst. I feel instantly guilty for snapping at him, but being the stubborn idiot that I am, I refuse to apologize right away. Instead, we stare at each other, glaring.
"When are you going to give up this whole victim act?" he yells, then shakes his head, looking away from me. "You have great friends who love you. People who like you. You have a boyfriend. Why do you always have to act as though everyone's against you?"
I open my mouth to reply, but come up with nothing. I shut it again, feeling like the biggest moron in the world.
"I don't act that way on purpose," I say quietly, feeling ashamed of myself. "Part of me knows that these people like me, but part of me is paranoid they hate me really. And... And I've always been jealous of every Potter or Weasley," I admit. "Ever since dad died, it's just been you, me, and mum. When you became friends with James, and I saw how close their family is, I wanted that. I wanted to have the big family that they have- with dad gone, our house seems more empty and lonely." I notice Alex's face soften slightly, but he still doesn't say anything. "Next year, you'll probably be gone and it'll be just me and mum. I feel like you're pushing us away already."
Finally, he looks at me again. "I'm sorry I made you feel like that," he apologizes, looking a little troubled. "You know I'm gonna visit you two a lot if I do move out next year, right? I'd never abandon you or mum."
"I know you wouldn't," I reply, smiling. "I just have these nagging what-if thoughts circling in my mind all the time."
"I'd go insane," Alex jokes. "If you can handle that, and getting good grades, no wonder you were placed in Ravenclaw."
Alex and I continue to talk, skipping the next class as well. I feel a bit anxious about skipping class, but no one comes down this way, so we don't get into any trouble. By the time lunch comes around, it feels as though Alex and I are friends again. He tells me more about his and Fred's relationship, and I feel moved by the way his face lights up, talking so highly of Fred.
Despite clearly not liking Jason, he asks me about him. He makes sure I'm happy. We discuss all sorts of things, you'd swear we spent the entire year apart. It sort of feels like that. It's odd how you can be with a person almost all the time, and know so little about each other. I feel light, as though nothing could bring my mood down. Everything feels okay again.
When it's lunch time, the two of us head up to the Great Hall together, laughing and joking about stupid things. However, Alex and I only make it as far as the Entrance Hall where we're met with the strangest scene.
James has Carter pinned up against the wall, looking angrier than I've ever seen him. Fred and the girls, and a few others stand around him. Fred and Rose notice us first, both of them dashing over to us. Fred looks sickly pale, and Rose looks like she's going to kill someone.
"What the bloody hell is going on?" Alex demands.
"Alex, it's... he knows," Fred says. "He started telling people about it this morning- people know." Fred is so panicked, he begins to make less sense by the second. With dread, I realize what he's talking about, though.
Alex looks like he's going to be sick, and I feel my blood boil. People are whispering to one another, looking over at Alex as though he's made an appearance on the Daily Prophet, or Witch Weekly.
James still has Carter pinned against the wall, who's babbling nonsense about it not being his fault. He looks to me, eyes wide. "If it's anyone's fault, it's Mia's."
"And why is that?" James demands, his hands tightening on Carter's shirt.
"Well, really, if you're going to talk, at least do it in private. Really, the corner of the Entrance Hall isn't exactly idealistic, now is it?"
I feel my pulse quicken, and my skin pale. However, I'm overcome with so much anger, all I want to do is punch that stupid dweeb in the face."Say what you want about me, Carter," I warn him through gritted teeth, "but don't you dare bring my family into this." I scowl. "Let him go, James."
James, after one shove against the wall, lets go of Carter, taking a step back from him. "Oh, and one last thing, Carter," I continue on. He raises an eyebrow, looking smug now that he's out of James' grip. I swing my hand back, balling my hand into a fist, and swing directly at his nose.
A searing pain goes through my hand, but for a moment, I feel triumphant by the wail Carter lets out. I hold my wrist, trying not to let the pain show on my face- Merlin, I need to learn how to throw a punch, I think to myself. A throbbing pain travels through my arm, and tears prick my eyes. I turn away, now facing the most stunned faces.
I hear Carter sobbing behind me. I feel somewhat proud of myself, but also a little ashamed.
"Holy crap, Mia," James exclaims, looking at me amused. "That was the best thing I've ever seen." He sees me cradling my arm, and comes over to inspect. Slowly, the others begin to react, all letting out their remarks of disbelief.
"You're supposed to keep the thumb on the outside," James informs me, still looking amazed.
"I think your thumb is dislocated-" Rose begins, before the Great Hall door opens, and Professor Calverny, professor Longbottom, and Professor Flitwick come racing out of the hall. They inspect the scene around them, looking horrified. I glance over at Carter, who's hands are raised to an unmistakably bloody nose. Oh, Merlin, am I in trouble for this.
Ah, damn. Am I really that transparent? Aha, I'm so glad a few of you seemed to want Alex and Fred to be together. From the moment I thought about writing this story, Alex and Fred have always been a pairing. And now I get to write about them openly, seeing as Carter is a stupid idiot... Yay for Mia, am I right?
I really wanted to write some development between Alex and Mia, and i feel as though maybe it's a boring chapter for some of you, but to me it feels important. Both of them get things out of the way that's been causing them to drift apart in closeness. I know they hang out with the same people (Ross and Monica, amiright?), but they weren't that close in any scene. I wanted to change that, because at the end of the day, they are family.
ANyway, I'm rambling on ..
Replies:
Lifeismorethanaprettyface: You are CORRECT! Good guess :D Ah, I'm glad it did :D I like writing James and Mia!
Guest: AHhh, I'm so happy you're happy :D
Cara Lavender: Ofc, Jia are adorable :P Well, yeah, people know he's dead, but they don't know how he died. That much is kept a secret that the family don't like discussing. Aha, you're right, it's Fred :P
Yay for Jia: He's bisexual, which I state above :) Fred, however, is gay.
Alice Monita: heh, i'm not giving away any of my plot to you guys :P
Jessica: Both are cute (if i do say so myself!). They are totally together :D Hope you enjoyed the chapter- and, since you say you like Fred x Alex, there will be future cute chapters with them ofc. Now I'm considering making a side story for them!
Haley: Well, you found out what they were doing in this chapter :D Eh, you'll have to wait and see, friend :D
Please review for more!
All the best 3
