Chapter 11
APOV
I open my heavy lidded eyes in the quiet hospital room to Christian's head on the bed near my hip, his mess of copper hair sticking out in all sorts of directions. That's one thing that hasn't changed about him, that hair of his can never be tamed. My right hand is being held in his own. He must have been holding onto it for a while because my palm is sweaty.
I wasn't expecting to find him at my bedside but he's here.
I take my time to really observe him without fear of getting caught. I really look at his face which is a little older, he has a few more tiny wrinkles around the eyes, his hair is still the same but I notice a few small gray hairs around his temples, his chin and jaw are more angular than I remember them being, he's still a gorgeous specimen to look at and after all this time he still wants me. I'm having a hard time believing it myself but I'm willing to try again. If it doesn't work out for whatever reason I don't think I would survive it a second time however I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering what if.
You needed him and he's here.
Knowing him he probably dropped everything and jumped on a plane to get here. He has done so much to prove to me how much he has changed and wants this, wants us to be a family.
As I stare at him a lump forms in my throat. What would have happened if he hadn't come back into my life? Who would have Charlotte called, how long would I have been laying on the kitchen floor?
I heard him crying at my bedside and it tore me up inside. I wanted to comfort him and take away his pain but sleep dragged me back down.
"Christian." I call out with my hoarse voice and pull my hand out of his grasp, running it through his hair gently to wake him up.
I have to call his name twice more before he opens his eyes and lifts his head. It takes him a couple of seconds to become aware of his surroundings.
"You're awake, how are you feeling?" He moves his body to the edge of the bed and leans closer to kiss me first on my lips then on the forehead.
"My chest hurts but fine. How did you know?" I ask then begin coughing.
He helps me lift the bed up so I'm upright and hands me some water.
"Charlotte called me crying after finding you on the floor. I called an ambulance to come to the house then your boss so she wouldn't be on her own with complete strangers then I flew straight down here.
"Where is she now?" I ask worried.
He points over to the couch across the room where our little girl is fast asleep.
"Can you bring her over to me please." I need to have her in my arms.
I watch as he walks over then carefully lifts her up in his arms before gently laying our daughter right next to me. I wrap one arm around her small body as I move her hair back and off her little face, what must she have gone through for those few hours.
I'm so sorry baby girl.
"I hate myself for scaring her like that."
"She's not the only one you scared. Don't you ever scare me like that again. Why didn't you tell me how bad you were feeling? I should spank you for hiding how sick you were. God, Ana that was the longest flight of my life not knowing what the hell was happening to you and Charlotte."
"I'm sorry." I avoid looking at him and keep my eyes on Charlie. What else can I say?
"What happened this morning?"
I cough once more and have another sip of my water before answering.
"I got up in the morning and went into the kitchen to get a glass of water. I started having a really bad coughing fit, felt lightheaded and then passed out I assume, I can't really remember much after that until waking up briefly here. Thank you for calling James. He made sure the doctors and nurses knew to tell me he had Charlotte with him."
"I think we should thank Charlotte for being such a smart little girl and calling me. Anyway the doctor I spoke to earlier said you'll need to stay here for a couple of days."
I groan and throw my head back onto the pillows.
"Really?" I complain.
I hate nothing more than being in hospital. What am I going to do about Charlotte? I'm about to try arguing for Christian to get me home sooner but he shuts me down before I get the chance to say anything.
"Yes, Anastasia, you're staying here and following doctor's orders. Don't worry because I'm staying. I'll be at the house with Charlotte until you get home and then as long as you need me to until you're better."
"No, Christian I can't ask you to do that. What about work, you can't stay away for so long."
I start coughing again.
"See, this is exactly why. You need help and your mother is away. I'm not leaving the two of you on your own. I'm staying and that's that."
I smile at him in gratitude. Who would have thought Christian Grey playing nurse and babysitter.
Charlotte wakes up and becomes upset upon remembering where she is and why. I take her in my lap rubbing her back up and down to calm her, reassuring her that I'm fine and there's nothing to worry about.
"I heard you were such a brave girl. Daddy told me what you did. You're my special hero do you know that?"
"You sure are. Maybe we need to get you your own superhero cape." Christian jokes getting a giggle out of her.
The three of us spend some time together until Charlotte begins to tire.
"It's getting late so I'm going to take Charlotte home. Rest up. We'll be back in the morning. Come on, Charlie say goodnight to mummy."
She looks at me surprised, her eyes welling with tears again.
"Mummy aren't you coming home?" She stares at me with her big, gray sad eyes.
She wraps her arms around my neck not letting go when Christian tries to pick her up off the bed.
"Not tonight baby girl. I need to stay here so the medicine can work and make me better. Be a good girl for daddy okay and I'll see you tomorrow."
She eventually goes into her father's arms laying her head on his shoulder. I never thought I would ever see them together this way. They have both taken to each other so easily and it's all I could have hoped for her, to be able to have her father and trust him and be with him if I was ever not around for whatever reason.
"Do you need anything?" Christian asks.
"Some clothes and toiletries would help. Oh, and my book on the bedside table please."
"You got it." He winks.
I kiss Charlie one more time and Christian gives me a kiss goodbye on my cheek then they start heading out.
"Christian!" I call out before he leaves.
He turns around expectantly.
"We…I…" How do I start this…There's so much I want to say but now is not the right time or place.
"Never mind. Good night."
CPOV
I had a very restless night. I dreamt I was stuck back in London and had trouble getting back to sleep. I was also keeping an ear out in case Charlie woke up in the middle of the night plus trying to think through and plan what I'm going to do while Ana is ill and not here. I glance at my phone noting it's only 6:30 in the morning.
After spending time with Ana at the hospital I brought Charlotte home, ordered food from the nearby Italian restaurant, gave her dinner and a quick shower before snuggling up with her on the couch to watch a movie. She was fast asleep before it was half way through. I spent the night in Ana's bed, her scent on the pillow making old and enjoyable memories pop up and my dick stand to attention, but the last thing I felt comfortable doing was jacking off in her bed with Charlotte across the hall.
I catch up on my emails for the next half an hour. Afterwards I check on Charlie who is only beginning to stir so I leave her until she's ready to get up and make my way into the kitchen to attempt to prepare breakfast for us.
First things first, coffee.
I open every cabinet door until I find the coffee, bowls, cups and cutlery. I found a box of Rice Bubbles cereal and bread for toast so that will have to do I suppose.
I'm pulling the milk out of the fridge when Charlotte drags herself in wearing her yellow heart patterned pyjamas and carrying her favourite teddy bear which she calls Dave, a grumpy, sleeping look on her small face. Her hair is a mess sticking out everywhere.
"Morning baby girl. Did you sleep well?"
"Yeah," She shrugs. "Can I watch cartoons?"
Maybe she's not a morning person.
"Okay but only for a few minutes then you need to have breakfast."
She leaves the kitchen and I hear the television being turned on.
I make my coffee and sit at the dining table then call Ros to explain what's happening and that I won't be at the office for the rest of the week at least. She's as understanding as she can be considering I didn't even tell her I was leaving the office yesterday let alone the state. My next call is to my mother to let her know that I'm back in Georgia and why. I also ask her if there is anything I should be doing to help Ana recover quicker. She tells me besides Ana taking antibiotics all I can do is ensure she rests and stays hydrated and that it can take one to three weeks to fully recover. Lastly I call Ryan to go shopping for me for clothes since I brought nothing with me.
I pour Charlie's cereal and milk in her red plastic bowl, place it on the table and call her in to come eat.
She takes a seat at the table, looks at her breakfast, pouts and crosses her arms.
"What's wrong?" I enquire.
"I don't want this."
"Well I'm sorry but this is what you're having."
"I want French toast."
Really kid? French toast?
"I didn't make you French toast."
"Mummy makes me French toast. I want mummy."
"Mummy is not here. Eat up so we can go see her at the hospital."
"No!"
I take three deep breaths in and out and count to ten before answering.
"If you don't eat your breakfast you're going to stay hungry. I'm not going to argue with you Charlotte."
"Fine. You eat it then."
She pushes the bowl away from in front of her almost spilling it all over the table.
Where the hell did this attitude come from?
"Charlotte Grey you will not speak to me like that. If you're going to be rude you can go to your room and not come out until you're ready to eat your cereal."
"My name is Charlotte Steele." She actually talks back to me before running off to her room.
Okay then. Her mother and I are going to have to have a chat about her surname eventually.
I feel terrible for yelling at her. It's the first time I have done so. She's missing Ana, yesterday was a traumatic day for her. I need to cut her some slack. If she wants French toast then maybe we can go out for breakfast instead.
When I open her bedroom door to speak to her I'm met with a mess. There are clothes and toys all over the place. How the hell did she make such a mess in so short a time? She's sitting on the floor surrounded by large pink and white blocks she is playing with to build a tower.
"Charlotte why are there so many clothes on the floor?"
"It must have been the rats." She answers deadpanned.
Excuse me? The what now? Rats?
"What are you talking about, what rats?"
"The baby rats made the mess."
Okay I'll play along.
"Is that so? And where did they come from?"
I cross my arms over my chest and lean against the door jamb, this should be interesting.
"The electricity holes in my room." She tells me pointing to the power point under her window.
"Really?"
"Yep. They're really small and came in and pulled down all the clothes then went into the kitchen to steal some cheese. You didn't see them because they're very sneaky, sometimes invisible."
I blow out a breath and rub my hands over my face. I'm tired already and it's only been an hour. She's creative, I'll give her that.
I get down on the carpet to sit beside her then sit her on my lap to get her undivided attention.
"Listen sweetheart, I know you miss mummy and were very scared yesterday but I promise she's okay and will be home in a couple of days but that doesn't mean you can be naughty and not listen to me because I'm going to be right here looking after you. Until then can we work as a team because Daddy was scared too and the truth is I've never made French toast before."
"You haven't." She says with wonder.
"Nope. Can you show me how?"
XXXXX
By the time we get to the hospital it's eleven o'clock and I have never felt so flustered and out of my depth before. Facing a boardroom is a piece of cake compared to dressing and trying to feed a child.
I left the kitchen in a mess from my attempt to follow Charlotte's instructions on French toast. In the end I said fuck it and we went out for pancakes instead.
After giving up on breakfast it was time to dress her which in itself was another battle. She insisted on dressing herself so I left her to it going to check on her five minutes later. Charlie's socks didn't match, she was testing me, seeing how far she can push me so I let her wear the two different coloured socks, one red, the other orange with her pink runners, yellow shorts and purple t-shirt. She's a mini rainbow. Her hair is in uneven, lopsided pigtails which she had to have.
I walk into Ana's room with Charlotte in one arm and Ana's bag in my other hand.
Ana starts laughing as soon as she sees us.
"So I take it the morning went well?"
I drop Charlie on the bed allowing her to climb onto Ana's lap.
I let out a breath and fall back into the chair.
"Don't ask."
I have such an extreme appreciation for Ana dealing with this and doing so much on her own for so long. She's super woman.
"I don't know if I can survive tonight on my own, this morning was horrible." I groan.
"Welcome to parenthood." She chuckles.
APOV
I have never been so happy to be home. The boredom in that hospital room was killing me, there is only so much time I can spend reading and sleeping. I was allowed to leave this afternoon with the strict instructions of resting and taking it easy from the doctor.
I am so grateful for Christian being here, looking after Charlotte even though there have been a few bumps and learning curves for him. I spoke to my mother the other day, she was ready to cut her vacation short and come home but I assured that everything was fine, Christian was here and besides he needs this. He needs the practice and responsibility of looking after her on his own, up until now it's been visits and fun stuff and Charlotte needs to realise she can't wrap her father around her little finger and get away with everything. He may not like having to discipline her but it's necessary.
He gets me settled on the couch with pillows and blankets, fussing like a mother hen.
"I'm fine, Christian."
"Now that you're home I was thinking of staying at a hotel if you think you'll manage in the evenings."
"Why?"
"You don't exactly have the space or a spare room, Ana and I definitely won't fit on your couch."
I shake my head at him. I won't hear of it, it feels wrong kicking him out after all he's done. We can work around the sleeping arrangements. In fact I would feel better knowing he's here if I can't get up to see to Charlie.
He could sleep in Charlotte's room and Charlie with me but I don't want to risk making her sick too.
"How about you take my bed with Charlie and I'll sleep in her room." I suggest.
"I don't know, Ana." He hesitates.
"Please, Christian. I want you to stay."
He is looking a bit uncomfortable and rubs the back of his neck.
"I mean is that appropriate, for me to sleep with her in the same bed. I'm not sure if I should."
"It is perfectly fine, Christian." I think it's sweet he is worrying so much.
That night as I'm saying goodnight to Charlotte, she gets all teary eyed when I hug her clinging onto my arm when I move away.
"What's wrong?"
"I never want to lose you." She sniffles.
"Oh sweetheart, I'm not going anywhere. Are you?"
"No."
"See, neither one of us is leaving. We are going to be together for a long time. Forever and ever. Especially in here." I tell her as I point to her heart.
"But what about when I'm a grown up?"
"What about it?"
"You'll be old."
Thanks Charlotte.
"So?"
"Well old people die." She answers like it's common knowledge.
Why is she thinking about this stuff, perhaps the image and trauma of finding me on the kitchen floor has affected her more than she has let on. I pull her closer into my body.
"Sweetheart, that is not going to happen for a very, very long time. I promise you. I'll be around until I'm a hundred. Hey, I'm a grown up and I still have my mum. Do you think grandma is old?"
She thinks about it for a moment.
"No, but how old is she?"
"48."
"That's old," She whines.
I need to remember to pass on this little conversation to my mother.
"Okay, it's time to sleep, I want you to think and dream of happy things, like how much I love you and what you would like to do tomorrow with daddy."
XXXXX
A week has passed since Christian brought me home from the hospital.
I called to thank James for taking care of Charlotte and also about how long I'll be away from work. He was very understanding and told me that things have slowed down coming up to the holidays so he insisted I take from now until the new year off and to look after myself. I couldn't thank him enough and hated leaving him without anyone to help him but he maintained that he'll manage.
Charlotte has loved having her daddy here for so long and they have spent hours playing and after dinner it is movie time for the three of us. She has him sitting there watching every Disney princess movie there is, in fact he actually learned how to make Charlotte's favourite French toast perfectly after that first disaster. I wonder what he is thinking about this domestic family life, is he happy being here and not working, he hasn't complained once but what if this life is not what he ever dreamt it to be. Christian has always thrived in his world of mergers and acquisitions. I'm being stupid, I shouldn't stress over something that is probably nothing but doubts in my own head only.
As much as I have been enjoying Christian's company there are times where he has been driving me nuts, like an annoying nurse, ensuring I take my antibiotics on time, three times a day and if he happens to be out he calls to double check I've taken them. I roll my eyes knowing he can't see me at those times. I'm a grown woman for crying out loud.
I myself am feeling a lot better but not quite yet back to perfect health with my cough lingering. Christian has been finding excuses to touch me such as offering back rubs or when he brings me a cup of tea his fingers brushing against mine, not that I'm complaining. He is making it hard to resist him though and I'm sick but on the other hand we need to take our time, I can't jump back in the sack with him so quickly. He'll think everything is okay and back to normal when it is so far from the case. Each morning he wakes up looking all delicious and sleep rumpled walking around in nothing but pyjama bottoms only. He's doing it on purpose I know he is, doing all he can to weaken my resolve.
He never misses an opportunity to kiss me whether it be first thing every morning or last thing at night. Thinking back to our mini make out session on the couch a couple of nights ago makes my skin feel hot, he had me underneath him with his leg between mine. I could feel his erection digging into me, boy is he bigger than I remembered. We were getting hot and heavy, his hands were everywhere until my coughing fit stopped us. Having his body on top of mine again was heavenly, even through layers of clothes between us I could feel every hard muscle moving against me.
I can't deny I've liked having him here. We have spent so much time talking in the evenings that it started to feel like old times. One night we watched home videos of Charlotte I had recorded such as when she took her first steps or sitting in her high chair eating and making an adorable mess.
"I wish I was able to be here sooner." He sadly told me.
"I know. We can't change it. You're here now, you weren't too late to get to know your daughter. She loves you, you know she does." I truly believe that. Even though it took him a while, even if it took him another five years, it would never have been too late to get to know his daughter and be a part of her life. The two of us however would have been a different story.
I'm sitting on the couch reading while Christian tucks Charlie in and reads to her. When he finally comes out he picks up my feet, sits on the couch and places them in his lap rubbing them.
"What are you doing?"
"Looking after my girlfriend."
"Who is this girlfriend, have I met her?" I joke.
He blushes and then I see his face change, as if he is concentrating too hard on something but can't come up with an answer.
"Listen, I've loved spending all this time together and I know I said that I'm willing to give us another chance and go out on dates but I can't just jump straight back into how it was before Christian. You understand that don't you. I appreciate everything you have done for me this past week, please be patient with me."
He puts my feet down then turns his body to face me better.
"Of course, baby. No rush. Anyway we need to talk about something."
"Okay? Sounds serious." He has me curious.
"You know I'm happy to stay here as long as you need me to but the thing is Ros called me earlier, she needs to fly out to one of our shipping yards in Asia so I need to get back to Seattle. I want you and Charlotte to fly back with me."
"Why would I do that?"
"Because that's where I need to be. I'll be there and you'll be here on your own."
"Your point being?"
"Look at what happened here, Anastasia. You had pneumonia and not taking care of yourself. What if it was worse? What if you hurt yourself when you fell and were bleeding? What if she didn't call me and you were left laying there for hours on end. I can't deal with that Ana. I need to know you're both safe. You're still not fully recovered and your mother is not due back for another five days." He fires back.
"There would have been a bit of a mess to clean up then off the kitchen floor." I hiss.
"You think your health is a joking matter?"
"You're overreacting. We're fine. I've been doing this on my own for a while now."
He hangs and shakes his head. Okay, even I'll admit that was a low blow.
"Do you think I want to risk losing you again? I was on that plane not knowing what I was going to find when I landed. You can't begin to imagine the terror I felt. Being here with the two of you has been incredible. I'm usually alone in that apartment of mine and missing you. Okay so the situation is not exactly ideal. What's so wrong with me wanting you both to come home with me? I also don't want to miss anymore of her life than I have to."
"I apologise and you're right I don't know how you felt when Charlotte called you but for the time being our life is here, Christian and you're not going to miss anything. I'll make sure of it."
Compromise Ana. Do this for him.
"How about we come back with you for a week or two until I'm fully recovered. We'll stay at Escala with you considering it's almost Christmas. We can spend it together, give Charlotte a wonderful holiday then come home after new year."
I see his shoulders slump in defeat, it's all I'm willing to give right now so he either takes it or leaves it. I'm not uprooting our whole lives back to Seattle just because he's afraid. We still don't know if this second time around is going to go anywhere.
"Okay, fine. I'll make the arrangements." With that he stands and walks away.
A/N: That rat story was told to me by my 7 year old when his room was messy so I just had to use it.
Whether Ana heard him talking or not will be reveled next chapter.
Thank you for reading.
