PART 2: HOME
"Love consists of this: two solitudes that meet, protect and greet each other."
Rainer Maria Rilke
oOo
For a moment she closed her eyes, apprehension bubbling in her heart as her body continued to be lifted in the air by some unseen force. Then she mustered up a courage to open them, and saw blindingly beautiful colours of light, streaming like a river upwards. Loki glanced at her, seeing all the radiant hues reflected off her eyes. She certainly looked like an innocent child at that moment, and all his anxiety for what would wait him in his kingdom perished for a second.
The scene flashed away as they regained their footing. Ase was greeted with a view of the shore, with a dark-skinned man, who was holding a sword. waiting before them. She immediately knew who he was, from his ethereal eyes which seemed as if they were peering into her soul.
"Heimdall," greeted Thor with a smile. A dizziness disturbed Ase, perhaps because of the overwhelming mode of travel. Heimdall pulled out his sword from the centre, assessing his visitors mindfully. He scrutinised Ase from head to toe, then to her staff. She stiffened upon his gaze and lowered her eyes.
"Thor," Heimdall acknowledged him. "The King has awaited you and your companions. You shall proceed to the palace immediately."
Thor nodded and gestured Ase to follow him. Hesitantly, she followed his steps, passing the Watcher of Worlds with cautious eyes. The Rainbow Bridge Elliot had told her was not in sight, much to her confusion. A gargantuan palace stood at the city's centre, reaching to the skies like a mountain. Her skin shivered, for she sensed an incredible energy lingering in the air. It was resonating with her, while alien at the same time.
"Welcome to Asgard," Thor presented to her. But Ase's amazement was merely momentary, for she remembered her purpose of being there. Loki stared at his home kingdom in melancholy, and she could only sympathise with his fate. Who knows what would await him before the throne, before his so-called adopted father.
"I will protect you from any unfriendly threats here, Ase," assured Thor. "Even if it means facing my father."
"You do not have to do that, Thor," she told him sharply. "Asgard has lost many, and it certainly does not need another lost prince."
Loki flinched at her words and she wished she could have taken it back. Several guards awaited them at the edge of the bridge, all of them cautiously glaring at Loki. Loki merely smiled back and remained nonchalant as the guards ushered them towards the palace. They walked through the streets of Asgard. People stared at them, or to be correct, at Ase. They should have cheered for Thor's return and booed for Loki's arrival, no doubt, but it seemed her presence there deterred them from saying anything silly.
The palace appeared more menacing up close, the grand structure towering them and shadowing them with holy darkness. Three men awaited them, all garbed in battle armour. A beautiful lady wearing a breastplate stood in front of them. A warrior, she seemed, with stern eyes and determined gaze. Ase deduced they were important people, for not random person could stare at the prince of Asgard so openly.
"Thor! Welcome back!" barked the largest man. He gave Thor a brotherly embrace and grinned. The other members of the welcoming party merely stared in awe.
"Alright, that's enough," Thor suggested, beaming awkwardly. The man let him down, then glowered at Ase.
"Who is this woman?" asked he. Ase raised a brow, for she sensed no hostility from him. Perhaps he had not been told of her circumstances in coming here. Thor pulled Ase to his side and exposed her to the welcoming troupe.
"Everyone, this is Ase. She was my comrade back in Earth," explained Thor, careful not to reveal anything more about her identity. Ase gave them an acknowledging bow. "Ase, these are the Warriors Three. Hogun, Fandral, and Volstagg," he continued, pointing at each of his friend. Hogun was a solemn man, she deduced, with a sharp gaze and an attentive face ready to respond any chaos. Volstagg radiated a brutish charm from his gigantic appearance. He was a typical barbarian, she presumed, though perhaps a principled barbarian at that. Lastly she looked at Fandarl, and the first thought coming to her mind was that he was a womaniser. End of story.
"Heimdall told us that you are bringing back a guest, but we certainly did not expect you to be so… beautiful," said Fandral slowly in a controlled voice. Her assumptions were immediately proven correct. Thor chuckled at his friend's futile advances.
"Unfortunately that does not work for my friend here, Fandral. She is just like Sif and the first thing she does when facing a foreigner is to glare at them," Thor said.
"I have met too many strangers," Ase replied bluntly. Fandral blinked in bemusement and then let out a small laughter.
"I guess you are different than most ladies, Lady Ase," Fandral said. The other lady cleared her throat just then, snatching their attentions.
"My name is Sif, for your information," she introduced herself stiffly. "I am the comrade of these silly men. It is a pleasure to meet you, Ase."
"It is also mine," said Ase. When she saw Sif, she saw the reflection of herself—a figure of absolute firmness and conviction. A woman who was not bent to the bids of men.
"Come. The King has been awaiting you all," Sif urged them.
Ase obediently followed as the three led them inside the palace. All the while, Loki's presence remained insignificant to the others. The palace was greater in the inside, embellished by statues and ornaments of gold and bronze. The ceilings were carved with the glorious battles of Asgardians in the past, and as she scanned them, her bronze eyes stopped at a particular panel. Frost giants battled Asgardian in a war which had brought both their destruction.
"Ase?" Thor asked when he saw her stopping. He joined her gaze and frowned. Loki too, paused, and observed the horrendous depiction.
"There is never a justified war. I realised that too late," Thor remarked darkly.
"I wonder what would you all do if you had known the future," Ase added.
The guards opened the doors to the throne room with a loud creak. Ase hid herself behind Thor from the numerous people lining the main walkway. They were those with armour and badges, capes and swords, all bearing the same authoritative look on their faces. High-ranking officers, Ase thought as she walked past them. Their eyes were focused on Loki, who tried his best to maintain his gleeful attitude for his impending judgement. Ase scanned the crowd briefly, trusting whatever her assessing skills could give her to find any sign of her mother. None of the crowd gave any sign.
At the centre of the room stood Odin, King of Asgard, and his wife Frigga. Ase knew from how Thor bowed to them in a familial manner. "Father, I have returned," said Thor calmly.
"Welcome back," Odin said, directing his greetings to Loki as well—although with a different motive. "You have done a great job back in Midgard, my son. I am proud of you."
The tension in the air was stifling, even for Thor. This was not a moment of joy. Odin then turned to Ase, who stood in there like a bull in a china shop. It was obvious now that she was both an Asgardian and not one. Her tall stature and blonde hair was a proof of this, but her pale skin and generally cold demeanour was not. "I welcome you as well, Lady Ase. We have much to discuss, and I come to you… after I settle an important matter." He gazed at all his audience and drew a deep breath. "I would like to discuss this in private. The rest of you please leave."
As his subjects were leaving, Odin's eyes darkened and his features slowly transformed into that of a merciless beast. Loki ignored him and instead turned to his mother.
"Loki," said Frigga.
"Hello… mother. Have I made you proud?" Loki asked with a smirk, though his usual cheerfulness was lost from his voice. Frigga shook her head and pursed her lips.
"Please, don't make this worse," she pleaded bitterly.
"Define worse," Loki shot back.
"Enough!" Odin warned. "I will speak to the prisoner alone."
Frigga sighed and left the throne room quietly. Thor tapped Ase's shoulder and gestured her to follow him outside. She wanted to refuse, for there was more to Loki's crimes than just his desire for the throne. Their short conversation in the detention room had changed her perceptions of him. He was no ordinary villain with blind ambitions. No, he was more than that. But she could do nothing to help him at this moment of time. Thus she relented and tailed Thor out of the room.
Loki glanced at Ase's disappearing figure as the door behind him closed. Ever since she joined the journey to Asgard, he could never stop thinking about her. What had been her purpose in coming here? From the battle in New York, he knew she was truly not human. She was a Jotun and that explained her vast knowledge of the race. But then, if she is connected with Asgard, then perhaps she is half- Asgardian herself. Last question remained: Why did she stay on Earth when she was part Asgardian?
"Have you realised the gravity of your crimes?" Odin's voice snapped him out of his train of thoughts. Loki had no interest in this. He knew the consequences—either death or lifetime imprisonment. But he mustered his smirk nevertheless. "Wherever you go there is war, ruin and death."
"I went down to Midgard to rule the people of Earth as a benevolent god. Just like you," Loki reasoned.
"We are not gods. We are born, we live, we die. Just as humans do."
"Give or take 5000 years," interjected Loki.
"All this because Loki desires a throne."
No. It is not, Loki told himself, but revealing his true feelings would mean his lost to this stupid egotistical fake father. "It is my birthright," he instead continued.
"Your birthright was to die as a child! Cast out onto a frozen rock. If I had not taken you in you would not be here now to hate me," shouted Odin.
"Then why did you take me in the first place? If you were intelligent enough then you must have known that your plan would not work," Loki shot back. "If I am for the axe, then for mercy's sake, just swing it. It's not that I don't love our little talks, it's just… I don't love them."
"Frigga is the only reason you are still alive and you will never see her again. You will spend the rest of your days in the dungeons."
There you go, Loki thought. He had expected nothing more. But who cares if Frigga would visit him or not? He was no longer her son, after all. A Frost Giant remains a Frost Giant, and a Frost Giant cannot be loved by an Asgardian. He no longer had anyone who loves him. Not a single one.
"And what of Thor? You'll make that witless oaf king while I rot in chains?" asked Loki.
"Thor must strife to undo the damage you have done. He will bring order to the nine realms and then, yes, he will be kin."
Loki spoke no further. If this was his fate then so be it. If death could not be given to him, then he would wait and watch the Asgardian burn themselves in their own faults. As he was taken away from Odin's sight, through the ominous doors of the hall, he found himself confronting Thor and Ase once more. Her eyes met his, and for that moment he realised she knew what had happened. She had always been sharper than the others.
"I am sorry," she said in his thoughts. He could not understand why she said that, for she owed him no wrongs. Only when he arrived in his cell and dwelled in his loneliness did he realise that it was not from an enemy to an enemy. Her words was from kin to kin.
oOo
A moment after Loki's departure, Ase was called upon by Odin. Thor was not asked to come, thus he could only gave her an encouraging nod. She took a deep breath before she entered, facing one on one with the mighty king. Mighty, she pondered as she stood before him and bowed deeply. There was no one inside the room, and Ase doubted now whether she would obtain the answers she needed right that instance.
"I assume you know of my true identity?" she asked him without further thought.
"Yes. Heimdall has told me everything he saw," Odin started. "It was such a wonder how you have managed to veil your presence all these years. Heimdall's eyes are foolproof. He can see all the things in the nine realms."
"Then you must have known that I am a daughter of a sorceress, yes?" Ase asked him again. "It turns out I am not entirely a Frost Giant after all." She took one step forward and reaffirmed her gaze. Let the people call her disrespectful. She would not hesitate in obtaining answers.
"Where is my mother?"
Odin took a deep breath as he stepped down from his throne. He nodded to the guards and they subsequently left them alone in their conversations. "She is here, alive and well. She has been expecting you ever since you have broken the spell. But before you meet her, you should understand—"
"That all she ever does is for my own good? Please," Ase interrupted sharply. "I have had enough lies. I can judge that on my own."
"Then you should know that part of her decision was my fault," Odin continued. "I was still foolish back then, unable to accept the fact that our people can live in peace. Look what it brought to us."
"You lied to Loki, I've heard," Ase added on his accord. "You hid his true heritage for hundreds of years and that resulted in a chaos in Asgard."
"And Jotunheim," Odin included grimly. "And Jotunheim. Loki unleashed the full power of the Bifrost in order to prove himself worthy as a king. He nearly destroyed Jotunheim as a result."
Ase could not believe what he had said, for many reasons. Firstly, she now understood how heartbroken Loki had been when he knew of his heritage. He must have hated his own kin. Secondly, the half-destruction meant only one thing: the chances of her finding her father had become slim. She had had the intention to search for her father, the being Elliot had always spoken highly of. The only Jotun worth of saving. That desire had multiplied tenfold when she was offered to come to Asgard. But it appears that hope had been lost a long time ago.
Yet, no matter how hard Ase tried to despise Loki for nearly destroying Jotunheim, she could not bring herself to. For he was not a villain without a reason. He had gone through so much and she had known many people who would do terrible things after losing what they cherished. She had seen him revealing his true nature, his vulnerability—all of which showed he was far from a mad psychopath.
There is a thin gap between heroes and villains in this world.
"I come here for my mother, not for Loki," she demanded tersely. "Now if you are being honest with me, I should be able to see her now—"
One of the doors was opened with a deafening bang. Ase whirled around to see their new visitor. In an instant, she saw the reflection of herself. A woman, dressed in a cloak, stood before her. Her braided golden hair was a shade brighter than her own, and her cheekbones were strong like hers. She was beautiful beyond imagination, and her bronze eyes were peering deep into her own.
Ase greeted her own mother with a cold gaze. "Lady Rhea," Odin said. "We have been waiting for you."
Rhea cared not for Odin and instead glued her attention to Ase. She could see disbelief carved on her eyes. Ase assessed herself, then her mother, then back to herself. They were the embodiment of each other, yet as different as the day and night.
"Ase," Rhea whispered. Ase shuddered. That voice was exactly as she had dreamt repeatedly for fifty years, the voice which would have welcomed her back home. Yet those fifty years had been grim and her heart had hardened. She was waiting for this inevitable yet despicable moment for a millennia.
Odin, sensing the ominous atmosphere growing, decided wisely to take a step back and leave the space for the reunion. "Ase, is that you?" asked Rhea. Ase clenched her fists and gritted her teeth.
"Yes, it is me, mother. Your long lost daughter," Ase spat.
"After all these years—"
"Where have you been?" Ase snapped. Her voice echoed in the hall, leaving ghostly sounds which sent shivers down Rhea's spine.
"I am very sorry, my child," Rhea slowly explained. "Leaving you on Midgard…It was the only choice I had left."
"What? Leaving me in that darkness for one thousand years?" Ase cried. "Leaving an infant who knew nothing of the world she was in, only to be awoken by a stranger? Where were you when I woke up?" The ground slightly trembled as her anger blasted the air. Rhea's face sank and beads of grief began forming at the edge of her eyes.
"Ase. I did that to protect you. Elliot should have told you how despicable Asgard could be towards their enemies back then!"
"Oh, so now I was the enemy?" Ase shot back. She took a hitched breath and chuckled. "An infant who could do nothing was the enemy? Now I understood why Loki hated this kingdom so much!"
"Ase!" Rhea reminded. "That is not your place to say—"
"No, it is entirely my place to say!" Ase retorted acutely. "You see, mother, I am quite disappointed as your daughter. A daughter of the 'most powerful sorceress'. The sorceress who could not even hide her presence to visit her lonely daughter in Midgard and give her hugs and kisses. Do you know what I felt when I discovered not my mother when I opened my eyes?" Ase could feel a cold air brewing under her feet.
Rhea could find no words to utter when she saw the floor beneath Ase cracking and tearing apart into frozen glaciers. Not only the floor, but the ceiling as well. Her eyes were drenched in blood, the scarlet of a Jotun's eyes. Terror brimmed in Rhea, not because of her daughter's immense power, but because what she was doing to herself. She had not learnt how to draw magic from her surroundings or the alternate universes, which had caused her exhaustion back in the Battle of New York. At this rate of over-consuming her own life energy, she could ultimately destroy her vessel and kill herself. "Ase, at this rate you are going to hurt yourself," she told her calmly, trying to conjure any spells which could stop her daughter. But Ase, like herself, was a powerful sorceress, and Rhea found—much to her horrors—all her spells being rebounded.
Ase could not dam her emotions back anymore and, in the final waves of her anger, she spoke, "I have been eternally injured since you left me, mother."
It was just then that Ase realised what she had done. She glanced up, towards the iced ceiling, and widened her eyes. Rhea watched as the ice magically dissipated to nothing, along with a gentle breeze rushing towards Ase's figure. But the pain she was experiencing did not disappear. The guilt of leaving her daughter on Midgard had been piercing her heart for hundreds of years, but only now did she realise how agonising it was. What have I done?
"Ase," Rhea pleaded. "Please. Give me time to right my wrongs."
Deep inside, Ase wished to say yes. To forgive her mother and finally feel the warmth of her mother, a figure she had never had in her life. But there was a burden in her soul which had not been removed, an aching hatred that dragged her down. It was still dragging her down.
"I am sorry," Ase whispered, turning away. "I should not have come here."
"Ase, no—"
But Ase could no longer hear a thing. Her senses were numb, so numb she could not feel the bleeding palm from her clenched fingers.
A/N: Hello guys! I am back! Exams are finally over and I can slightly breath (heuuhh) a breath of freedom. Anyways, this chapter is the beginning of the new arc, which takes place in Thor: the Dark World and will explore more deeply about Loki's and Ase's relationship, as well as Ase's and Rhea's mother-and-daughter connection. There will be a side story in this arc which moves away from the movie, but I am still kind of developing it.
Regarding Ase and Rhea's confrontation, I feel like it is most fitting for her to disapprove her mom at first. To accept her mother the way she is was just not true to Ase's cold and stony-hearted character. She may feel antagonistic in a sense, but it is what I like about her. You will find that she is not exactly the most obedient character.
Anyways, thank you for reading the chapter again. I hope you like it and I will see you next time.
