Given recent events, I'd just like to take a moment to remind everyone that Assassins is a Broadway show that exists and that everyone should be familiar with. It's a Sondheim show about the captivatingly horrible people who have attempted, with varying degrees of success, to kill the President. It's a fantastic show and seems noticeably relevant right now. Also the 2004 revival has Neil Patrick Harris in it, but the orchestration isn't anywhere near as good as the original, so if you go for the soundtrack go for the original off-Broadway production.
The Harry Potter fans will realise the true evilness that is there satanic book, You've never actually met a Harry Potter fan, have you? and will convert to the way of Christ! You are all fools for saying such disgusting thigs! Oooo, ooo, I want to know what set him off. I hope you all bum ink hell! "Get out of Ink Hell man, you're bumming all the books out"
And so Percy of Christ taught Rachael's household a holey lesson. Prayer Warrior "lessons" tend to have a lot of holes in them. And occasionally in their recipients afterward. And behold he said, "Dare not mock God, for his is holus. God is a vegetable? I was like a evil beast, having sex with a whore, Beasts seldom have the money to pay hookers but I have changed, and I a have become like St Paul, Not egotistical at all a true massager of Christ. Jesus just has back problems ok?
"I will also talk to Rachael's father, for he has sinned against the ways of God. By doing…? Although he has been baptized in the ways of Christ, he can never enter his holy Church, for her father has removed his testacies, Why would you do that… and that is a sin. Since when? And why? AND WHY WOULD ANYONE DO THAT? Or are we talking about a vasectomy and this is more anti-birth-control stuff? God commands that anyone with a testacies should pray at home, So does that mean he shouldn't pray at home because he no longer has them? everyone else must go to his holy church at least once a week on Sunday and pray for their soles! It being common knowledge that God really only cares about your feet. This also means that they must pray whenever they can. Shouldn't he have died from not eating or sleeping a long while ago then? Kinda hard to pray and eat or sleep at the same time. This can be at home, at school, at work, and out and about. But if you were to pray literally whenever possible you would never go to work again because you'd be too busy praying. They must pray! Just in case you weren't sure that the god Jerry worshipped was a narcissistic megalomaniac yet. If at home someone refuse to let you pray, make then leave your house! Well yeah, the hell kind of guest does that? Then again, who prays when they have guests over? If someone at school refuses you to pray, make them leave, On what authority? You can't just kick people out of places you don't run because you feel like it. may it be student or the teacher, Especially if they have authority over you. Believe me, that does NOT end well. they should not refuse someones right to pray. If someone refuses to let you pray at work, either quit your job, Given that you can't exactly pray and work at the same time, that's a pretty reasonable reason for them to fire you actually. I mean, like a few seconds here and there is one thing, but this is a prayer warrior (or at least Percy pretending to be a prayer warrior for espionage reasons). That is not what he's talking about. or if you are the boss, fire the person that complains to you about praying. If someone is praying loudly or often enough for someone to complain to their boss something is wrong. Even if they refuses to pray, they must be fired, for it is a sin against Christ! And that is how unemployment skyrocketed to 98% And if a police refuses to let you pray, Is that a…thing that happens? I don't think it is. continues to pray. Even if you are sent to prison, God will be proud at your bravery and courage, for that is what God rewards people with. God rewards you with prison sentences? Man, your version of god is sounding more and more like a Bond villain every second. Obey Gods law, not mans law, for mans law is corrupt and evil, created be Satan! Or, you know, man.
"And now I must go my friend Tyson, for he must be converted also." YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED And so I went to him and explains the ways of Christ, "So, if you don't do exactly what Jerry tells you to do you're evil and we kill you." "Why worship a false god which will not give you eternal live, Yeah, there are a bunch of false gods and cults that DO offer eternal life. Go join one of those. when you can worship a true God, who has a eternal son who died on the cross to save us all? …Because he doesn't believe in that god. And, as a human being, he is repulsed by the things you lunatics do in his name. My God can save you. "Or kill you. Your choice." Please convert, or you will suffer in the eternal flames of hell!" Yay extortion!
And Tyson said, "I will not convert for I love to sin too much." Props to you dude. Wish you'd taken a moral or ethical stand against them, but that's a valid reason too, considering all the things Jerry thinks are sins. I was so annoyed that I took a stone and stoned him to death, I too often stone people to death when annoyed. for he would not submit to the way of our lord Jesus Christ, one true God. Such a valid reason to kill someone. /sarcasm.
And I said, "The fool is dead. LONG LIVE THE FOOL! God will not allow a nonbelieber to live. I will die before I submit to Bieber! A fool will die a fools death! Well…yes…by definition. All men must die. Therefore, if a man is a fool, then that man's death is a fool's death, therefore he has died a fool's death. I will then move onto the camp and warm everyone "I brought electric blankets!" else of the evilness of Satan, or they will suffer!"
I will not delete this story. No one asked you to. We're laughing our asses off at this thing. Besides, you're making yourself look terrible, so this is helping your enemies if anything. You should or convert to the ways of Christ, or you will suffer the eternal flams of hell! I'm already working on my plan to become King of Hell. I just need the backing of either Johnny Gat or one of the Winchester brothers.
