A/N: I'm glad that whatever possessed FFnet and made it stop sending out alerts is finally dead and gone at least for now. Grrr…another long chapter! Woohoo! To New Fan: sign in! Leaving long reviews always makes me want to write back and thank you, but alas, I can't when you are anonymous. You can ask anyone, (except my boyfriend) I don't bite. I promised to one that this would be the chapter that Sess finally gets his…I am sorry to announce it was too long, I had to cut it in half. So next chapter instead…
Disclaimer: Noooooope. Too bad I don't, there'd be a lot less money troubles.
Last Chapter: A long interlude of Inuyasha, Kagome, Koinu, Akisame, Miroku, Sango, Kohimu, Tisoki, Kasai, Masuyo, and of course Shippo. Phew! Shippo, having grown, discussed stories he heard while wandering through Japan, the war in the Isei. He also revealed the rumor of Sesshomaru having a wife to Inuyasha and Kagome. Meanwhile Sesshomaru returned to Rin at his palace Jouka in the Western Lands. Rin can tell he's troubled but he refuses to speak of it.
Two Daughters
Winter plodded onward. Rin spent most of it sleeping or talking to Jijo. Sesshomaru remained distant, though he was with her in the confines of the palace, never leaving. They ate their meals together, but Sesshomaru never mentioned her pregnancy, and never revealed his inner thoughts to her. Rin knew little about the war over the Isei, she didn't know that Sesshomaru was arranging the government there, securing himself as its new leader. Even if she had known it wouldn't have occupied much of her thoughts. Rin's mind could focus on only one thing, despite her efforts to distract herself from it.
Every day that passed mercifully without the sudden, aching pains of the miscarriage was a blessing and a small nudge in the direction of hope and joy. Rin's body adjusted as time went on. Her appetite returned with vigor. Soon when she ate beside Sesshomaru it was hurried, as if she had gone back in time and become a starving little girl again.
The winter storms blew on outside. Sunny days came, snow accumulated. On days when Sesshomaru was occupied with meeting his advisors and court retainers, Rin sat with Jijo on the porches and balconies of Jouka. Occasionally, if she felt strong and adventurous, she made the worried old woman walk with her through the gardens. Snow covered the gardens became a whole other world. An ice and snow maze that Rin could get lost in. While she was hidden away in them, feeling he chilly wind on her face, in her hair, and then the warmth of the weak winter sunlight at her back, she could forget, for a time, the precarious life that hung on inside her.
Yet as spring came closer, it became harder and harder for her to forget. Her appetite remained well but she felt weaker. The trips outside became fewer, although the sun was rising earlier and earlier over the landscape, melting the snow away bit by bit. Soon the horses would be set free from the stables to graze along the river. The cherry blossoms would start to peek out as tiny little buds on the branches of the trees in the gardens.
Sesshomaru withdrew from her in this time, allowing her to sleep. He ate without calling her to join him, and had meals sent to her in bed. Occasionally he brought them himself, but Rin hardly had the courage to look him in the eye. She couldn't bring herself to ask him to stay; often the solitude was helpful to her. Sesshomaru had large swathes of land to rule over. His presence was needed elsewhere, but he would stay unquestioningly with her while she struggled with his unborn child. Even so, it hurt Rin to see him withdrawing emotionally. She understood his reasoning—he had no expectation of success and didn't want to be present for the inevitable grief. Disaster was near…
But weeks passed and there came no blood, no sudden, sharp pains. The weakness remained, but Rin found more and more that she could ignore it. Hope began to spread its wings. Rin found herself focusing more and more on the child within her. As March neared, she estimated that the baby was one of her longest lasting, but it had another month to go before it would reach territory that Rin had never gotten to before.
Sesshomaru continued to remain distant, though his visits to her room became more frequent. He didn't call her to eat with him, but rather he brought the meals himself and watched over her as she ate them.
On one such day, as the temperature soared for the first time enough to begin melting the snow away in earnest, Sesshomaru brought her both her meals and her tea, acting as if he were a servant and not the proud, stubborn inuyoukai lord that he was. Shyly, Rin ate the food, trying to restrain herself from gobbling it down, and when that was finished she began with the tea. Every so often she paused to thank him, bowing clumsily from her bed.
Sesshomaru gave his customary response, "It is nothing." The meal was completely normal until, as she sipped at the first of her tea, he lifted his voice, sounding almost cautious, as if afraid. "The child is female."
Rin nearly choked on the tea. She set it aside, coughing fiercely. She didn't see it through her fit but Sesshomaru stiffened, concern softened his face. He waited patiently for her to recover, and then he asked, "You are surprised?"
He had never revealed this sort of thing to her before. It was logical for Rin to assume that he knew the genders of every child she'd lost—she understood how powerful his sense of smell was—but he had never openly shared this information with her. It changed her view of him as she reevaluated her own pain alongside his. She carried the babies, but Sesshomaru scented them, knew their genders, perhaps other things that she couldn't even imagine.
"How…" she stammered, feeling her face heat up, no doubt coloring itself red, "How long have you known?"
The inuyoukai was stoic, though she thought she caught tenderness in the curve of his mouth. "Several weeks."
Rin searched his face, carefully. For some reason this made Sesshomaru look away, gazing into nothing, as if her scrutiny frightened him. Momentary alarm flashed through Rin, but she pushed it away, deciding that what she was seeing was in fact embarrassment. Sesshomaru rarely spoke candidly with her about their child. His language referring to it was always cold and distant since her miscarriages had begun. It was the largest clue she had to his pain, to his mourning of their lost children.
"What else do you know about her?" she asked, feeling a rising warmth inside her, a thrill to be able to put a gender on her child. It was like an unspoken promise of life, of success.
"I believe Kuenai was correct in his guess." Sesshomaru murmured, quietly. "You were sabotaged." He stared at her directly then, through the dimness of the room. Rin saw a twitch in his facial muscles, a quick, angry narrowing of the eyes. "It is my responsibility to find this saboteur and punish him."
Rin could see the ruthlessness in his face, the driving need he had for retribution. It stilled the warmth inside her, freezing it over. "Lord Sesshomaru." She whispered, leaning forward and reaching out to him.
Her palm cupped his cheek. His skin was burningly hot, and when his golden eyes flicked her way again, Rin felt the growing passion from him like the heat thrown from a flame.
It was a mutual, although unspoken agreement between the couple—since her second miscarriage—that sex was not possible between them during her pregnancies. For a time Rin had believed her first two miscarriages were the result of intimacy with Sesshomaru. He was not a harsh lover, but he was demanding. An inuyoukai lover possessed needs above and beyond the average human male. Sesshomaru was very capable of remaining celibate for decades if he had to, but once ignited he was a needy lover. It might take an entire night to satisfy him properly. Rin wasn't dead as far as desire was concerned, but she feared for her baby—her daughter—if she were to encourage her mate much further.
She let her hand fall away, but Sesshomaru snatched it, moving so fast that Rin hadn't even seen the movement. He held it in his hand, gripping it tightly. "You may travel to the village to worship at the shrine, if you wish." He told her, gently, "But travel protected, Rin. I will not lose you."
"You won't lose me." Rin smiled, staring into his face. She longed to kiss him, but feared where it would lead. As if reminding her what was at stake, Rin felt movement in her abdomen, like bubbles passing through water. She gasped and pulled away from Sesshomaru, feeling herself concernedly.
"Rin?" Sesshomaru asked her, roughly now, concerned.
Her pregnancy was about four months in, and Rin knew that she still appeared thin, that the servants that didn't know her personally wouldn't have guessed that she was pregnant on sight. Her robes his any tiny signs, but Rin herself was aware of the change in her body shape. Her abdomen had grown hard, pushed out slightly with inner pressure. The flutter of movement in her now made her grin unrestrainedly.
"I felt her…" she breathed, looking up at her mate again with wide, overjoyed eyes.
"She is strong." Sesshomaru inclined his head insubstantially, giving only the slightest of nods. "Rin." He called, trying to recapture her attention.
"Yes?" she was shining, ecstatic…
Sesshomaru's eyes lost their focus. It was impossible to face her happiness without thinking of the looming disaster ahead. "I must leave you. I must avenge your loss."
Her face fell, but she recovered almost instantaneously. "I understand, my lord." There were multiple levels for her to be saddened about. Sesshomaru's language, "your loss" told her that he was still removing himself from her pregnancies, unwilling to expose the pain she knew he felt. Then of course there was the fact that he would be leaving her for a time. It was for revenge essentially, to right a wrong, but Rin couldn't see how he'd find the saboteur. And, at any rate, it was likely there were multiple culprits. One to pay the poisoner, one to poison Rin, and a messenger to carry the money, the message, and the poison itself.
She couldn't fight his decision, however. Bowing, Rin answered, "May this lowly one ask that Lord Sesshomaru return to her swiftly?"
"Within the week." He answered, without hesitation. Then, after a small pause, he leaned forward and touched her, laying his hand over her long, black hair. He touched her ear, stroking it reverently with his clawed fingertips, then he touched her jaw, her cheek…
Rin shook under his touch, closing her eyes. She longed to look up at him, to welcome him into her bed, but the memory of the baby moving inside her was so fresh…
Sesshomaru made the move, not giving her the choice. He moved forward, without warning, and, with her chin in between his powerful fingers, raised her chin enough to kiss her. In spite of his unexpected movement, his kiss was gentle and tender, expressing without words, the love he felt for her. He withheld his passion, understanding her fear. The kiss ended and he rose to his feet, moving away through the darkness of her room like a wraith.
Rin shuddered with her own suppressed desire and sighed. Her tea had grown cold, but so had her thirst for it. Wrapping her arms around herself, Rin focused her thoughts on her—their—daughter, and tried to imagine what the child would look like…
When Sesshomaru had told Rin that he needed to leave and avenge her miscarriages, he'd been telling the truth, but only partially. There was another reason why he had to leave her, as much as he despised being taken away.
Daken had been sent from the Isei, from the secret palace where Ginrei and Tsukiyume were hidden away. He came with several bits of news. The first was that, as the snows began melting with the warming weather; strange youkai had been spotted lingering around the palace. Daken had sent for more guards to protect the women, but before they'd come, Tsukiyume was abducted in the night.
That was startling enough to draw Sesshomaru away from Jouka in itself. He had to corroborate Daken's story and find the girl. If she was killed of injured, her brother would surely blame Sesshomaru and it would lead to a whole new war. Sesshomaru didn't fear the young inuyoukai lord, but it wouldn't just be Shimofuri that he'd be forced to battle. The whole of the Middle Lands, and all of the inuyoukai clan, could be turned against him. Even then Sesshomaru felt he stood a chance at victory, but it would damage his people, their land, their confidence in him…
None of that was very palatable to Sesshomaru.
News of a different kind stunned him as well. Daken told him that Ginrei was with child. He'd doubted the news and insisted that Daken explain how he knew this. Apparently Ginrei had not sent for Sesshomaru, she had no desire to see him. Jaken and Tsukiyume had called for Daken when they noticed her scent changing. When Daken had asked Ginrei directly she asked him not to speak to Sesshomaru. She didn't want her husband to return to her, and she was perfectly content to carry his potential heir without him hovering over her—as any inuyoukai father would.
Daken, in spite of his doubts, had honored Ginrei's request. When he gave Sesshomaru news from Naishougoto, he left out Ginrei's pregnancy. It was only when Tsukiyume was abducted that he'd decided it was wise to tell Sesshomaru the full truth.
Sesshomaru had sat in the meeting room with Daken, silent and stunned. He stared ahead, unseeingly while Daken told him all of this, finishing at last with, "Unless my nose has lost its touch over the centuries, I believe Lord Sesshomaru, that you and your wife will be welcoming a daughter come late summer." He smirked nervously, showing his fanged canines.
A daughter. Sesshomaru allowed the realization to sink in, and then asked himself whether or not he believed it. Ginrei's behavior was erratic. Now that she was pregnant she didn't want him there, perhaps she wanted to keep the child secret. Perhaps she was ashamed and couldn't face him.
In many ways Sesshomaru understood that emotion: shame. The last thing he wanted to do was see Ginrei in Naishougoto.
With a last bit of hope, Sesshomaru entertained the thought that Daken was wrong, or mistaken, or playing a very, very cruel joke on him. He asked—and was irritated by the breathlessness and weakness his voice revealed—Daken whether or not he had scented Ginrei himself, or if all of this had been reported to him second hand.
Daken snorted, shifting uncomfortably, but there was a small sliver of pain in his eyes that he didn't bother to hide. "You insult me, Lord Sesshomaru! Of course I scented her myself. There is no doubt about it. You are now the proud father of Lady Ginrei's child."
Panic tried to insert itself. Sesshomaru felt his joints weaken, as if he'd been drugged. His voice shook slightly when he spoke, though his tone was mercifully still cold and uncaring. "Perhaps she found another male…"
Daken visibly bristled, his brow furrowing. He interrupted Sesshomaru fiercely. "Lady Ginrei is not a common whore. I smelled you very clearly in that pup." Daken's continually smirking face twisted, becoming a snarl, "Take responsibility for your actions, Sesshomaru."
He'd scolded Daken for the outburst, but was, nonetheless, ashamed. In a matter of months he'd gone from being childless, heirless, to having two females pregnant with his daughters. Daughters weren't what he truly needed, but they intimidated him because they were part of him, they shared his genes undoubtedly. The instincts rolling around inside him were confusing, complex—and entirely unwanted.
But he couldn't push them aside as much as he wanted to. Tsukiyume had been abducted. That matter came first. He had no choice but to leave and investigate. He tried to keep his mind open, to avoid revealing his near-panic. There were many reasons why someone would abduct Tsukiyume, none of which Sesshomaru liked. It could've been unrest in the Isei and Tsukiyume was taken because she was the blood-sister of Shimofuri, the current ruler. It could've been done to threaten Sesshomaru himself, or even to start a war between Shimofuri and Sesshomaru.
It might have no political motive behind it as well. Hanyou were despised by humans as well as demon-kind. Scenting her, an angry youkai might've rushed in and taken her just to kill her or enslave her as a personal show of power.
The least threatening, and yet most disturbing thought on Tsukiyume's disappearance, was that it might've been orchestrated by her brother, Shimofuri. If that were the case it meant that Tsukiyume would be safe, which was good, but it also showed Sesshomaru that the young ruler was capable of leading an uprising. Without Tsukiyume to control Shimofuri, Sesshomaru's power was under threat. Shimofuri could retake the Isei. He could expose Sesshomaru, even take Ginrei from him, stealing Sesshomaru's heirs…
It was all of this combined that forced Sesshomaru to leave Rin. He left for Naishougoto first, eager to deal with the trouble there and put it behind him as best as he could. He left with Daken, hurrying through the mountain passes across the Western Lands. The snow remained thick and deep in most areas, impossible for humans to pass through, and difficult even for some youkai. It slowed their journeying time, increasing Sesshomaru's agitation all the while.
(A week or so earlier at Naishougoto)
Tsukiyume hadn't been able to look at Ginrei directly for weeks. She wanted to befriend the inuyoukai woman, but when she smelled Ginrei's pregnancy, when she saw Ginrei eating or drinking and living life as if nothing had changed, as if nothing was wrong, she was sickened inside. Every word spoken to Ginrei was a betrayal to Rin.
Tsukiyume could remember the smell of Rin's grief, the leftover stink of blood from her lost babies. Rin's tears too haunted her.
Ginrei had no fear of losing her child, she probably, Tsukiyume mused, thought nothing of the baby. Perhaps, though Tsukiyume thought this was highly unlikely, Ginrei was not even aware of the child within her. She showed no interest in the idea of summoning Sesshomaru, she wished to continue her lessons, even those that involved physical training, and her pregnancy was virtually without symptoms. There was no hardship for Ginrei; in fact it seemed to be the opposite. She was cheerier than Tsukiyume had ever seen her, although she was no more talkative than usual.
Jaken had nothing but good things to say about her, and he was pleased that she was pregnant. His nose, not as sharp as even an inuhanyou's, was still able to detect the difference. And he'd scented the change in Rin enough to recognize it in a fellow youkai. Tsukiyume wanted to speak out to the toad, to ask him how he could be happy about it when it was nothing but despicable, a huge, unthinkable betrayal of poor Rin…but she didn't have the courage.
On the night of her abduction the chefs served an elaborate meal and some tea to Tsukiyume, Jaken, and Ginrei. Jaken, as always, was the biggest talker.
"That Daken fellow that Lord Sesshomaru uses as a messenger…" he was saying, while gulping down mouthfuls of pickles, "…has told me that there are some strange demons roaming around."
Ginrei and Tsukiyume didn't respond. Tsukiyume focused on her tea, though she didn't drink it. Ginrei stared at the toad, hands folded in her lap, her face blank but her eyes alert. This was all the encouragement that Jaken needed. He'd talked so much during the evening, mostly about trivial things that meant nothing, that the women had finished their meals long ago and were already on tea. Jaken was only just moving to drink his own and his food wasn't even gone yet.
"I can't believe Lord Sesshomaru would leave us here so unprotected! No strange youkai should be able to get within miles of this place!" he was fuming, grumblingly. "That Daken is going to bring in more protection, as I understand it, but…" he stammered, losing his point, "Still!"
During his little speech, Ginrei had reached for her tea and, when it was lifted halfway to her lips, she faltered, nearly spilling it. She set the cup down as fast as she could, grimacing. Her sudden movements drew Jaken and Tsukiyume's eyes together.
Jaken was at once concerned. Since he'd learned that she was pregnant, Jaken had grown especially gentle with her. The idea of his beloved Lord Sesshomaru at last producing an heir was such wonderful news to him that he could see nothing else. He understood that Rin was in the dark, that Sesshomaru was playing a dangerous game, and on some level it was likely that he disapproved, but his love for Sesshomaru outweighed that thought and blinded him. "Are you all right, Lady Ginrei?"
She nodded, but she'd placed one hand over her abdomen, the other was still setting the teacup on the table, pushing it away from her. "I'm fine." She responded, quietly. Her gaze slid over the table and lifted to meet with Tsukiyume's. The inuyoukai woman smiled gently, though her silver eyes showed uncertainty. She was aware of Tsukiyume's unusual quiet for a long time now, and also aware that the hanyou was uncomfortable around her. She'd tried, on many occasions, to do what she'd done just now, and then search Tsukiyume's face when the hanyou girl was caught staring at her, unabashedly. Now she caught Tsukiyume's orange-brown eyes narrowed at her with some unreadable, negative emotion—resentment, dislike.
Timidly, Ginrei looked away at once, feeling her face heat up.
Tsukiyume did the same, focusing on the table as if it had started lecturing her on something she was about to be tested on.
Jaken made a tiny noise of contentment and reached forward, snatching up his tea in his tiny, three-fingered hands. He slurped down the drink clumsily, making yummy noises loud and clearly.
"I'm going to bed." Tsukiyume announced. She scooted back from the table and rose to her feet.
"You never touched your tea, girl!" Jaken called out, horrified that she could turn down something as perfect as tea.
"You can have it, Jaken." Tsukiyume tossed the words over her shoulder and slid the door open, disappearing into the darkened hallway outside.
The toad shook his head. "Ungrateful hanyou." He clumsily reached across the table, trying to grab Tsukiyume's tea for himself.
While he was busy with that, Ginrei swallowed nervously, coming to an abrupt decision. "Jaken, I believe I also will retire." Ginrei bowed slightly, smiling faintly at the toad. She'd become fond of him over the weeks. He was a silly, fussy creature. He was an inappropriate teacher for her, seeing as that Ginrei was more educated than he was in many areas. She endured lessons that were nothing more than review for her day after day without complaint. Jaken had showed her unwavering, blind kindness, mostly because she was pregnant with his beloved Lord Sesshomaru's heir, but even so, Ginrei couldn't turn away the well-meaning toad.
"Oh! Yes, you must be tired, Lady Ginrei." Jaken stopped reaching for Tsukiyume's tea and watched her exiting with a warm, even tender gaze. "Sleep well Lady Ginrei!"
Ginrei slipped out into the hallway, pausing for a moment as she slid the door shut behind her. It was unlit outside, and chilled. Ginrei huddled her robes around her more closely. She took a deep breath and started down the narrow hall—not toward her own room, but toward Tsukiyume's.
She reached the door and stood still, listening and smelling with her acute senses. Tsukiyume, on the other side of the door, was doing the same thing and frowning deeply.
"What do you want, Lady Ginrei?" she asked, trying to sound neutral, bland. Just like Sesshomaru…
"Have I done something to offend you, Lady Tsukiyume?" Ginrei asked. She knew that using formal terms with Tsukiyume would annoy the hanyou, but she couldn't restrain herself. Traditional, respectful titles had been pounded into her from birth as a courtly woman. In seeking information or an apology, courtesy was key. She couldn't leave out a nice title to Tsukiyume now…
"You haven't done anything." Tsukiyume sighed, but she could still feel her face set in a hard scowl, in spite of her own reassurances to Ginrei. "Go to sleep, my lady."
Ginrei held her breath for a moment, considering her options. At last she slid Tsukiyume's door open and stepped into the room. It was lit with braziers and warmer than the hallway. She shivered as she stepped into the little room's warmth.
From her futon in the center of the room, Tsukiyume twisted her dog ears around, listening to Ginrei's entrance. She felt a growing bubble of annoyance inside her, ready to pop and spew its noxious contents everywhere. She rolled her shoulders in their sockets, repeated an internal mantra to try and disperse her frustration. Ginrei is not deserving of my dislike…she is a victim. Ginrei is a victim…
But the memory of Rin's blood, her grief, her suffering…Rin is just as much a victim…
"Lady Ginrei?" she asked, hesitantly.
"You harbor some negativity toward me." Ginrei murmured, confidently. "What have I done to offend you?"
Tsukiyume sighed, closing her eyes frustratedly. "Nothing." She repeated, ears drooping.
"Then why do you treat me as you do? For weeks now you've ignored me, you refuse to teach me as you once did. What have I done to displease you?" the words were well-practiced, careful, and formal. Ginrei had given them thought and she'd been well-trained. A good little lady of the court.
The thought made Tsukiyume's blood start to boil. She flicked her clawed fingers, took a deep breath. Anger was new to her, though the politics of the court were not. Her mother and brother had versed her in them. In some ways she and Ginrei were alike, though Ginrei had been taught much more extensively than Tsukiyume had. In the past Tsukiyume had been taught to speak eloquently, to argue her opinions as an assignment from her brother or her mother. Now things were personal. In days passed she'd felt nothing toward the topics her mother or her brother gave her to practice with. Now Ginrei was made an enemy emotionally, though rationally Tsukiyume knew she had no reason not to befriend her, and no reason not to tell her the truth…
Tsukiyume's ears fell backward as she considered it. Sesshomaru was unlikely to have told Ginrei. The two women, his mate and his wife, knew nothing of one another. They knew nothing of their shared troubles, of their ironic likeness to one another: Rin and Ginrei were both without family, unless Sesshomaru was counted. They were both trying to have the said inuyoukai lord's offspring. They were both interested in education, in power…
They might've bonded if Sesshomaru had introduced Ginrei gently into his household. Instead he flirted with disaster.
He might've bought Tsukiyume's loyalty, but instead he used her to distract or comfort one woman or the other. He told her she could go home, and then coerced her to stay somewhere else.
Tsukiyume's hands curled into fists, her mind was made up.
"Has Lord Sesshomaru ever mentioned to Lady Ginrei where he goes when he isn't with her?" Tsukiyume asked, abruptly. Her ears were still pinned warningly against her thick black hair.
There was a pause; Ginrei was startled into silence for some time. At last she said, "No…"
"Then Lord Sesshomaru has never told you of his mate." Tsukiyume felt her heart picking up speed, a sickening twist in her stomach—excitement. She wondered, was this what her brother or her mother felt when they had control over another sentient creature? Was this what Sesshomaru felt when he kept Tsukiyume away from Shimofuri, and through her, controlled him? I have complete power over you…
But her power was not over Ginrei in this moment, if was over Sesshomaru and he had no idea. Wherever he was at that moment, he was living in a false security that Tsukiyume was about to shatter.
The twisting in her stomach increased, making her want to scream to relieve it.
"His mate?" Ginrei asked, clueless.
"Her name is Lady Rin. Before he brought me here I was her companion." Tsukiyume fought her own facial muscles, fought the smug smile that was trying to take shape there.
Ginrei shifted slightly, perhaps trying to step forward. She would want to see Tsukiyume's face of course. The hanyou girl made no move to face her and Ginrei stopped moving, settling for saying, "I have heard her name before." She was cautious but curious, "Who is she?"
"She is a human woman." Tsukiyume strained her ears, listening for the intake of air, the gasp, the outrage that was sure to follow…
None came. Only a question, "Human?"
"Yes. Sesshomaru loves her a great deal. He rescued her when she was a girl, resurrected her with the sword his father passed onto him—the Tenseiga." Tsukiyume fought the urge to turn and stare openly at her victim's face as she spoke.
Ginrei spoke quickly now, commenting on Tsukiyume's lack of respect for Sesshomaru. "You did not give my husband the correct title, Lady Tsukiyume."
Tsukiyume could resist no longer. She turned around, facing the door to her room and the inuyoukai woman who'd invaded it. Her white ears flattened down on her skull. "That's right, I didn't." she felt her jaw tightening, her claws biting into the flesh of her palms, "If you want the truth, Lady Ginrei, my loyalty belongs with shish-sama and with Lady Rin." She stared at the floor, afraid of the anger her eyes would expose if she looked directly at Ginrei. "I cannot approve of what he's doing here."
Ginrei was stiff. "You mean with me?"
Tsukiyume felt her anger spike for a second, then drift away into a softer bitterness. "You don't understand—Lady Rin has been at his side for years. In all of those years she has been unable to have his child." Tsukiyume felt her face heating up. It was a betrayal to speak of Rin's misfortune. It would be like calling down the lost souls of her unborn babies to take revenge and silence Tsukiyume for exposing their would-be mother's shame.
"She is barren?" Ginrei asked, hardly whispering. Tsukiyume picked out sympathy in her voice and bristled at once.
"No." she glared up at Ginrei and then looked away, bitter.
Ginrei lowered herself down gradually into a sitting position on Tsukiyume's floor. She was thinking carefully, reading into Tsukiyume's words as much truth as she could. One hand found her still flat abdomen and stayed there; mirroring the path her thoughts were taking. "You feel it isn't fair that I am…"
Tsukiyume stopped her from saying more, "Forget what I've said. Sesshomaru is a monster. He's told Lady Rin nothing about you, and you nothing about Lady Rin."
Ginrei was gazing at her keenly. "It would be a great burden for you. Knowing us both, but unable to defy Lord Sesshomaru."
Tsukiyume felt her anger rising again, this time with no outlet. How could Ginrei be so astute suddenly? Had pregnancy steadied her emotions, calmed her? How cruel that Ginrei—who probably could've cared less whether she birthed the child or not—would be so blessed by the onset of pregnancy while Rin both loved and dreaded each day, always fearing and yet expecting the loss. It angered Tsukiyume as she'd never been before. The politics, which she'd always been taught to discuss dryly, mimicking great leaders like Sesshomaru, were cruel and heartless underneath; right to the people they affected the most.
"Just please…" Tsukiyume broke the silence and to her shame, felt her voice cracking as the pressure in her chest built beyond her capacity to control it. "Leave me."
Ginrei nodded and rose to her feet, vanishing silently.
Tsukiyume sat frozen after the inuyoukai woman had left. She drew deep breaths, burying her anger, her frustration at her helplessness…
And then the world erupted around her. Through her shuttered window, a little clay pot smashed through and crashed onto the floor. It burst open and a thick, greasy smoke filled the room. Tsukiyume gasped, stumbling away from it in shock. She lifted her arm over her face, covering her nose and mouth. When the smoke hit the brazier burning in one corner, it doused the flame, pitching the room into the blackness.
Tsukiyume coughed and tried to crawl for the door. "Jaken!" she shouted, thinking in the back of her mind how stupid she was to call to a toad for help. What would he do to help her? She opened her mouth and cried out, "Ginrei!"
Footsteps were approaching over the floorboards outside. She heard Ginrei's feminine voice faintly and Jaken's high pitch, panicked whimpering.
A shadow smashed through the wall where the window had admitted the smoking clay pot. Its scent was thick and musky even through the stink of the smoke. Tsukiyume cried out with fresh panic. "Help me!"
The thing—a demon—rushed at her. It was clothed in black, like a ninja. Tsukiyume shouted at it, drawing up her previous rage, and slashed at it. The creature ducked her attack and lunged for her. She fought, kicking, screaming. The door to her room slid open; she heard cries of alarm from Ginrei and Jaken. Other female voices were accumulating as well, the maids.
The thing grabbed up her wrists and flung her over his shoulder. Tsukiyume screamed. The world spun as the ninja beast barreled out of her room. The chilly night air reached Tsukiyume's skin.
Desperate, Tsukiyume brought her knee around and, with all of the strength she could manage in her awkward position; she kneed him in the gut. The creature groaned and stumbled, falling into the lumpy, left over patches of snow. Tsukiyume was thrown from his shoulders. She rolled over the ground, clawing at the snow, at the weeds and rocks around her. In a moment she was on her feet and dropped into the battle ready position. Her eyes adjusted to the darkness and roved around until they found the black-clad youkai a few feet away, hauling himself cautiously to his feet.
"Get out of my way!" she snarled, trying—and succeeding she thought—to sound dangerous.
The creature faced her, and now she saw that past his black mask he had light colored eyes, blue or green. "Lady Tsukiyume." He called, hissing to stay quiet, "I've been sent by Lord Sasugainu to bring you back to your brother."
Tsukiyume blinked, her tense, self-defense posture wavered a little. "Who are you?"
"My name is Kofum. I'm a mongrel." His voice was wry, self-mocking, "Part inuyoukai, part wolf youkai. My father was from Nishiyori's clan."
Tsukiyume stared at him, searchingly. Behind him, nearly dragging the snow, she could see a furry tail, dark gray in color. She tried to scent him, and—barely—passed the stink of the smoke; she found his story was true.
"Why would my uncle send you and not someone I'd recognize?" she wasn't about to let herself be kidnapped if it wasn't really her uncle and her brother in charge.
"They cannot let this incident be connected directly to them." he took a breath and held it a moment. "I'm sorry my lady, I cannot tell you more. We must leave, they will come after you swiftly." He leapt past her, making Tsukiyume gasp and stumble out of the way. The mongrel youkai stopped several bounds ahead and turned back to regard her. "Are you coming?"
Tsukiyume glanced briefly back at Naishougoto. The palace was in an uproar. Already she could see lanterns and torches being lit, she could hear the frantic shouting…
She smirked and turned to face Kofum. "I'm coming."
A/N: I had to split this chapter into 2 chapters, so as a result you get a sneak peek at the exciting, climactic next chapter! (Which happens, I think, to be lucky number 13…):
She stared at him, still hearing the ringing in her ears, the press of something heavy and thick against her chest, making it hard for her to breathe. Every breath was a miracle because she took it without throwing up all over the floor. "I cannot believe you." her voice was a pathetic whimper, weakness…so like a human…
