Yippee! Another installment in this sordid tale of lust, love, and utter insanity. Where will it end? When will it end? I'm proud to say I've finally decided on an ending that will most likely be to your liking. If not…well, you're not the one who's already put eight months of devotion into this fic, so too bad. Ha, just kidding.

Also, I posted a sneak preview to this chapter on my livejournal not long ago. IF you checked it, then you already have some idea of what's going to happen, if not, you're already behind the game. Hence the importance of said livejournal. Be sure to check it regularly and leave comments, or it'll defeat the whole purpose. For a link, go to the previous chapter or the homepage listed on my bio.

I've been doing a lot of one-shot work lately, and that's taken away from the time I can spend on this fic, but I think these last few chapters have been some of my best work yet. Wish me luck, loyal readers, and enjoy chapter 12: Tremors.

Disclaimer: .:points to shadowy figure:. The scary man says I own nothing, and I'm inclined to believe him. I only hope this next chess match goes better than the last…

Anyone who looked out one of the windows in Sesshoumaru's castle would have claimed it was one of the most beautiful nights in history. The stars were sparkling drops of dew, falling endlessly into a pool of seductive darkness. The moon had shrunken away into the barest wisp of a crescent, no more than the shining bow of some ancient, mystical warrior. The many racing comets were sleek white arrows cutting through the night.

The trees sang with the wind—a perfect, soothing lullaby. Fireflies danced through the air, flashing their entrancing lights to call their lovers into their embrace. Even those tiny insects knew of the sweet comfort brought from the arms of your beloved.

However, not every lover had managed to find content that night.

Miroku woke from his vivid nightmares with a gasp of unimaginable pain. His body was soaked in sticky sweat and trembling violently. He wished he could blame his sweating and tremors on the man that'd just finished making love to him, but his mind would not accept such a blatant lie. The monk glanced over at the demon next to him, eyes darting guiltily over the silky silver hair and smooth skin that'd had him moaning not hours ago…

He shook his head stubbornly, trying to force his breathing back to normal. His heart went from hammering in his chest to skipping entire beats. It only added to the mad whirlwind of thoughts blowing through his exhausted mind. Sesshoumaru stirred slightly in his sleep, and Miroku held his panicked breath as he waited to see if the demon would wake up.

Some small part of his mind was praying his lover would awaken and wrap him tightly in his arms, but a larger, more forceful part was willing the youkai back to sleep. Sesshoumaru let out a soft sigh of contentment and shifted into a more comfortable position, drifting back into his deep repose.

Miroku let out a tight breath and shut his eyes forcefully. He was so confused he felt like crying, though he knew that would accomplish nothing. The white sheets on the bed clung to his body like a second skin, making the cool night feel like an unbearable chill. Miroku peeled the sheets off and climbed shakily to his feet, desperately seeking some distance from his lover.

He stumbled, naked and bleary-eyed, to a set of doors on the opposite side of the room. He opened them slowly, shivering as a sudden whoosh of cool air sent goose bumps creeping across his skin. The doors led to a private balcony, and Miroku closed them quickly behind him, hoping Sesshoumaru would stay asleep.

Cool moonlight splashed down all around him, making his skin glow like polished ivory. The monk gazed up at the perfect night sky, yet he could find no beauty in it whatsoever. The angst buried so deeply in his eyes was blinding him to his surroundings.

All he could see was a barrage of faded images from the nightmare he'd had moments before, the nightmare that had forced him to start awake in a fit of cold sweat. The dreams weren't like anything Miroku had ever had before. He remembered seeing disturbing images in his sleep when he'd first fallen in love with Sesshoumaru—images of his friends and loved ones as they abandoned him—but that wasn't what this was.

In the vivid nightmares, Miroku's friends had been replaced by people he'd never seen before in his life. He supposed he couldn't really describe them as 'people' since they were all obviously demons.

The powerful youkai filled his dreams in the most disturbing way. He could see himself, standing by Sesshoumaru's side as his lover introduced him to the demon world. Miroku could see the horror on the faces of the other demons, could see their fury and hatred. He could see walls bathed in blood and piles of mangled bodies, all of which were the people that Sesshoumaru would have to kill in order to protect his lover.

Miroku didn't know what cruel god was granting him these sickening visions of gore and conflict, but the icy feeling in his stomach told him they spoke the truth. If Sesshoumaru and he continued to pursue a relationship, only death would come from it. At first, it would only be the death of others… but eventually…

Miroku swallowed thickly as he suddenly remembered all too well the last few scenes of his nightmare. No matter how many of their kinsmen were killed, the demons kept attacking and attacking. They refused to let the noble line of a fellow demon be 'soiled' with the blood of a human. Their territorial nature wouldn't let them.

And finally, it had been too much.

Miroku could see plainly how his love for Sesshoumaru would fail, how it would lead to the death of one of them or both. Sesshoumaru would die defending him; or he would be too late and Miroku would die alone; or it would prove too much for both of them and they would perish together.

Whatever the scenario, the outcome was always the same. Miroku would ultimately lead Sesshoumaru to eternal torment. There was no escape from it. Not as long as their love continued.

How did I get myself into this mess? Miroku thought as he leaned against the castle wall, feeling the harsh stone rub against his skin. All I did was save one inu youkai from death. That's all. I happened upon him in the woods and cared for him. Why is it that so much more came from that one simple action?

What have I done to deserve such heartache? Is this the balance I'm supposed to walk as a Buddhist monk? The so-called 'Middle Path'? On one side, the love and tenderness of the one man whom I'd do anything for—on the other, death for my beloved and myself. How can I possibly promise him my heart if that same promise could mean endless suffering?

Miroku bit his lip in frustration. When did I start loving him so much I couldn't stand it? A sudden memory flashed before Miroku's eyes:

"Miroku," Sesshoumaru whispered against the monk's skin as he feathered kisses on his neck, "I…" but his words were silenced by Miroku's kiss.

It was a scene from just a few hours ago, when he'd first left the safety of his camp with his friends and been reunited with the youkai lord.

"Sesshoumaru," Miroku whispered aloud, "were you going to say…were you really…?" Miroku trailed off as his thoughts consumed him. It had honestly sounded as if Sesshoumaru were about to tell him he loved him. Miroku's heart fluttered slightly at this thought, but it wasn't the usual flutter.

Before, only joy had come from the thought of hearing those words slip out from between Sesshoumaru's sculpted lips; now, they brought sheer terror with them. What will happen to us when Sesshoumaru finally acknowledges his feelings? I already know my life will change forever, but will his confession make my visions come true? If I can stop him from ever giving me his heart, will that keep my love safe?

Miroku's heart ached at the thought. He wanted nothing more than to know for sure of Sesshoumaru's love for him, yet those words could mean the downfall of everything he cherished.

The monk started slightly as he heard a soft noise behind him. Alive with paranoia after his unsettling dreams, Miroku prepared himself for some sort of disaster. A moment later, warm arms wrapped around his naked waist from behind, and he realized there was no need.

Sesshoumaru had woken up to find Miroku missing and had come looking for him. No doubt the beautiful demon had simply lifted his nose to the air and searched for his lover's familiar scent, leading him to the balcony.

"What are you doing out here?" the demon whispered into Miroku's ear, "and naked nonetheless? You're already shivering." Sesshoumaru held his lover closer, pressing the human's back into his muscled abdomen. Sesshoumaru didn't realize the cold wasn't the source of Miroku's tremors. The tickle of Sesshoumaru's warm breath on his ear had ignited Miroku's passion as easily as a bonfire ignites a single autumn leaf.

He leaned his head back onto Sesshoumaru's strong shoulder and relaxed in the demon's arms. It felt so good to be held like this, in a warm and caring embrace. But at the same time, it frightened Miroku beyond all reason. All it had taken was a few whispered words and he'd forgotten all the danger in their path.

Miroku immediately straightened up and pulled away from his lover, eyes downcast. He couldn't let this go on. How could they ever survive if they couldn't concentrate on the danger they were in?

"What's wrong?" Sesshoumaru asked as he turned Miroku around to face him, wanting the human to look him in the eye. Miroku steadfastly refused to meet this silent request, choosing instead to examine a place in the balcony railing where the stone had chipped just the tiniest amount.

Sesshoumaru couldn't understand why his mate was acting so strangely, but he supposed it was just built up nerves from the abrupt way in which he'd been brought to this new setting. The beautiful demon leaned forward and kissed Miroku's neck. A small gasp escaped from the human, low and breathy.

Sesshoumaru grinned slightly and let his tongue slide over Miroku's tender flesh, reveling in both his sweet taste and his sudden, surprised moan of pleasure. This human was such a funny thing. A few months ago, the inu would have killed him if he'd simply proved more bothersome to keep alive.

Now, he would never let Miroku's death come if he could prevent it. What was it that had changed in these past few months? Was it his illness? He'd come so perilously close to dying so many times, but Miroku had stayed with him—cared for him—through it all. Or was it something more than that?

Could it be he was drawn to this human with the help of destiny, or some other supernatural force? Where they meant to be together, regardless of Sesshoumaru's former opinions on mixed-breed relationships? The demon couldn't really say for sure. Something about Miroku called to him, a little twinge in his heart that made his skin tingle pleasantly.

He would never be able to ignore that call, no matter how many obstacles lay in their way or how many times they were torn apart. Sesshoumaru would search from the ends of the earth to the depths of hell in order to find Miroku and claim him once more.

"Miroku," Sesshoumaru whispered against the monk's sweet flesh, alternating between licking hot lines down his throat and nipping him gently, "there's something I want to tell you."

Miroku was so caught up in the delicious attention he was receiving, he almost didn't hear the demon. When the words finally registered in his lust-blurred mind, his mahogany eyes bolted open to twice their normal size.

"I just wanted to tell you… I…" Before Sesshoumaru could finish his sentence, Miroku suddenly let out a high-pitched yelp. Sesshoumaru's head jerked up with surprise. He watched as Miroku suddenly ducked under his arms and pulled away completely. The human couldn't have looked more shocked if he'd just stepped on an electric-charged porcupine.

Sesshoumaru growled slightly. Why was he always getting interrupted the moment before he finally said what he'd had on his mind all along?

"What's wrong now?" An edge of irritation crept into his normally stoic voice.

Miroku opened and closed his mouth several times, guilt shining in his beautiful eyes. "I… I just… I need some time to think, Sesshoumaru." With that, he whirled around and strode straight for the balcony doors, leaving behind a very confused demon lord.

The inu stared after him with a look of complete and utter bewilderment. "What in all the rings of hell…" He trailed off without completing his vulgar oath. He'd never been much for them anyway. "I thought this was what he wanted…"

To be continued…