Jerome stared at the ceiling for a long time that night. Alfie had told him what Mara said. He knew the way that she felt. Or at least he thought that he did. He knew what he felt.
He missed everything. He missed normal conversation and flirting loudly and obnoxiously, just because he could. He missed joking with Patricia and knowing that it was a joke, instead of assuming, hoping that her hurtful words were in jest.
He should be grateful, that's what they had always told him. You're a rich, white boy in one of the best boarding schools in England, be grateful.
But he couldn't help feeling like it had all gone to shit.
The adventure had been fun, Mara had trusted him and worked with him. He had thought that she was happy. But then it was danger and anger and Patricia and screaming. And now it was different, and he couldn't ever get it back. Everything that he loved left him eventually, and he could never get it back.
God, it's all gone to shit.
