Gundam Seed : Chapter Eleven
Fatal Attraction
Cagalli Yula Athha looked around the large room that the council was currently occupying, taking in the red plush carpeting and the soundproofed walls, the armed guards that stood discreetly at the entrance and the long rectangular table that could seat more than what was there before laying her eyes on the twelve council members who were all whispering amongst themselves, talking, making up their minds about what she had just proposed. Cagalli could not help tapping her slim fingers on the table that she was presiding over impatiently, she hated the wait, waiting was something she had never gotten used to as her eyes looked sharply at everyone who was there. Hinata Yui who was sitting beside her made a small gesture with her fingers, and Cagalli nearly snorted as she looked at Hinata with her eyebrows raised.
Patience? I hate being patient.
Cagalli averted her eyes from Hinata's reproachful ones before settling to staring straight ahead, counting backwards from one hundred. It was the most she could bear and Hinata was right, this was a trivial thing, she is the Representative and therefore able to focus on the matter beforehand with utmost calm instead of being riled up so easily. Cagalli curled her fist tightly for a few seconds before releasing the tension, willing herself to stay calm and hiding the impatience behind an impassive mask that she had three years to perfect. To get worked up over such a trivial thing at the moment was pointless and a waste of energy.
Cagalli would have loved to use her power as the Representative to overrule everybody and be done with it but, she had to be just, this was after all a democratic country and she could not act like it was the total opposite. Her mind wandered back to what had happened earlier, the events that occurred was what was occupying her mind right now and after her call she wanted no more to follow up on that particular job she had asked as a favour from a certain friend she had made during her days on the streets.
During that war when her father had died.
Blocking that depressing thought from her mind, she cleared her throat slightly, loud enough to gain everybody's attention and to stop the discussions. Evidently, they had made their mind up earlier and were merely using the extra time to gossip and speculate and Cagalli's latest move irking her very much. However, she could not blame them as she had got down to business and disallowed anybody to ask anything till the whole presentation was over, they had been docile, surprisingly, as to the reason why, that was something Cagalli had no time to think about.
" What is the council's decision?" Cagalli asked, her voice strong as she set her amber eyes into a simple stare that included everyone around her, taking in their expressions and observing, trying to come up with a plan if they declined.
" Why the sudden move?" A lazy voice drawled from the back, attracting everybody's attention, a cue for payback.
" Thank you for that question Montage, as I had put it earlier, it is as a way to improve Orb."
" Are you sure?" This time it was General Peter Jones who spoke up.
Cagalli felt unease as she looked at the twelve people surrounding her, they were all staring back at her with something akin to glee in their eyes and even Taylor Madison whom Cagalli had trusted looked away when Cagalli looked at her. The atmosphere in the boardroom was tense as suspense hung in the air, everybody waiting with bated breath for the ax to drop, all knowing something and keeping mum about it.
" What do you mean?" Cagalli asked, feigning innocence as she tried to work out what was wrong, something did not feel right, it was as if the council members knew about what had happened and that they were just stringing her along with their docility.
What a fool you are Cagalli.
" What he meant was that you are hiding something from us and this seems to be an event that all of us need to be concerned about." Razeef, a Muslim and Orb's PR said from where he sat on Cagalli's left. A soft spoken man with a pleasant smile perpetually plastered on his face, he was a man that most people relaxed around and opened up to, which in that case was an advantage for Orb's intrapersonal relationships but now, it was merely sarcastic and patronizing from Cagalli's point of view. His words made Cagalli pale and she knew for sure that the cat was out of the bag.
" There is nothing to be explained." Hinata immediately objected strongly from the sidelines, sensing danger and wanting to protect the Representative. Her dark eyes flashing dangerously as she stared down at those other council members and was about to say more when with a wave of Cagalli's hand, fell silent. Hinata turned to look at her friend, frowning, wondering why Cagalli had stopped her but realized with a start that Cagalli, pale but with determination written in her eyes was about to tell the council what Lacus Clyne had wanted to do to Orb.
" No.." She protested but stopped in mid sentence when Cagalli shook her head and smiled slightly.
There is no turning back. The secret is out.
" Are you about to say something Representative? Because we are all ears." Montage Dirge said looking disgusted at Hinata before disregarding her presence and focusing on the Representative, arms wide open encompassing the whole council whom with interested expressions continued to look on at the drama that was enfolding.
Like hyenas waiting for the victim to die before having a feast.
Cagalli closed her eyes for a moment, feeling the shock reside back to the back of her mind and steeling herself as she regained her composure, she steepled her fingers together before leaning forward as she raked her eyes once again around the whole boardroom. Taking in a deep breath and hoping that her voice would not come out strained, Cagalli started to tell what the council wanted to hear from her own mouth.
Time seemed to slow down as she spoke and not willing to show that she was afraid, Cagalli continued to keep eye contact with the people who were there and as more time passed by, Cagalli noticed the council's eyes widening in response and their eyes turning one by one to stare accusatory at her to what she was currently saying, Cagalli wanted to laugh, throw back her head and laugh loudly for the whole world to hear.
Loudly and bitterly.
This was what she got after working so hard for her country.
" Oh please." Montage stopped her in mid sentence, rolling his eyes, being the insolent brute that he was. "You are just trying to save yourself, come on the way I see it, the best conclusion to this whole event is that you should just let go of your seat of power and let somebody else handle the whole situation."
Cagalli tried to repress her uprising anger as she stared hard at Montage's smirking face and the heads that were nodding to his suggestion, "Are you challenging my judgment, Montage? Do you think that I do not want to save this country? Or are you trying to imply that maybe that other somebody is you?"
" Oh do please forgive me, Representative, did I say something wrong? I'm acting like a buffoon once again. But..." At this, Montage's eyes gleamed as he continued, " but I'm after all merely saying what I think is true. Lacus Clyne wants Orb, so let her have it. Your father's ideals have expired long long time ago and since you are his daughter, we, the council have decided once and for all that we would like something new."
Cagalli's eyes narrowed dangerously at Montage's speech and could not believe her ears at what she had just heard, " Are you trying to overthrow me, Montage? Are all of you in this as well?"
A heavy silence that threatened to suffocate Cagalli befell the room as all the past fatigue and worries tried to overwhelm her, she could feel her heart racing as everything blanked out from her mind. She felt so tired and helpless, everything was going downhill as time ran out for her and Orb.
This is not happening. Not when everything she had worked for so long and so hard was about to prosper and grow. Not when the peace that everybody was having now was fruits of her father's ideals, and especially not now when she needed to have the power to protect what she was scared would come true.
" Answer me. Are all of you in this as well? A leader can only be overthrown if and only if three quarters of the council supports that decision and there is evidence on why she is supposed to be fired. Do you all have it and if so, please do not waste anymore time and just get on with it." Cagalli demanded, surprisingly calm.
" Yes. The council voted unanimously." Taylor Madison spoke up out of the blue, the one person Cagalli thought she could trust and would have supported her, " I was the one who collected the votes."
" I see. So you were the one who told the others."
" I was merely doing my job."
" I thought you wanted what was best for Orb? Who else here can lead Orb better?" Cagalli asked, glaring at Taylor who glared back defensively but in the end was no match for the lion cub's determined golden ones.
" Tell me Taylor, is this not what you have wanted for Orb? Peace and it's prospering? Look around you Taylor and tell me that the people in Orb are suffering because of me, tell me if the people are dissatisfied with how I rule."
"….."
" The council has voted, that's the final decision." Montage said hurriedly, noticing Taylor wavering, he could not afford to loose her. She had been the hardest to convince, he had started with Zadie and General Jones, they had used money, lots of it to buy Taylor, bribed her more likely and at the same time threatened her if she did not cooperate they would destroy the lair that she had created for her friends, her so called family.
Those cyber geeks.
Taylor Madison. He had found out her weak spot easy enough and he remembered her flustered expression, the panic when she realized that Montage had been serious, enjoying the terror that came with the panic as she watched the video that he had made personally for her. Those screams, the terrified tears that came and the begging had been so melodious, the fire that threatened to burn the person alive crackling and moving as if it had a life of its own, slowly and surely starting to lick at the victim, tasting him.
The pyre had been made so easily and catching one of them was even easier. They had no defense and he had lured, dangled technology like a carrot in front of them and they had followed him without second thought. The video was a live feed and it was blatantly clear what Montage wanted Taylor to do.
Agree and they live. Oppose and they die.
Taylor had succumbed immediately, screaming and striking at Montage as he played with her, toying with her emotions, taking his sweet time in calling the whole torture off. But, it was so unfortunate that by the time he gave his orders, the person was already burning merrily like a bonfire and they could do nothing to put it off.
But it was not as if they tried hard anyways.
The live feed was the last straw and Taylor had done nothing else but agree, wanting to save her family, not caring about Orb anymore. It was this motherly instinct that Montage loved and he smirked. It was endless, borderless, what women would do for love.
But, he could not succeed without proper backing and the rubbish that everybody thought they were, were the best source of power when push came to shove. It was thanks to Zadie, General Peter Jones and of course their immense wealth that had led to this day.
Realization dawned in Cagalli's eyes, " I see Montage. You bribed the council beforehand haven't you? When did you work on Taylor?"
" What…what…what.. are you talking about?" Montage spluttered pretentiously, his eyes taunting, " Don't throw accusations where you can't prove true, Representative, or should I say ex- Representative?"
" I see that this meeting is over, I shall excuse myself then." Cagalli said calmly, hiding her true emotions where only she could feel the hurt, the betrayal, and the disappointment. She would not cry, not now, not here.
" Be my guest and oh by the way, you are fired. Do have a nice day, ne?"
Cagalli swallowed her barbed retort and before anybody else could say anything else, stood up as regally as possible and walked out of the boardroom with as much dignity she could muster. There was nothing else left except her pride and she was damned if that betrayed her too.
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Cagalli Yula Athha, now ex Representative of Orb, slammed the documents that she was holding onto the desk before pacing her office like a trapped golden leopard. Hinata Yui who was following behind looked at her worriedly while the two security guards that were there to escort Cagalli out of the building as the last insult by Montage stood by the door, looking on.
" Miss Athha, I'm afraid that you have fifteen minutes to get what you want and leave." One of the guards spoke up, his brown eyes looking pitifully at the girl in front of him. He was one of the late Uzumi's staunch supporters and was glad that his daughter had lived up to his expectations, keeping the country peaceful and prospering under her rule but now, she was leaving. He had no idea what had conspired behind those close doors and all he knew were Montage's orders. But, by the looks of it, Cagalli was leaving against her own will.
" Damn that bastard." Cagalli spat through clenched teeth, fire raging in her veins, ignoring the people around her, focusing on nothing but her anger. " Kuso!" She cursed as she slammed her fist onto the table, the pain that came with it not registering in her mind. " Kuso!"
It wasn't supposed to happen like this, how could they, those respected people be bribed into thinking what a man like Montage wanted? How could those people believe the lies that Montage spewed out of his foul mouth? Did they not want peace? Did they not understand by giving in to Lacus, she would win and Orb would no longer be the neutral country it once was?
Hinata and the guards looked at one another, watching as Cagalli walk furiously towards the window, embarrassed at the display of emotion. The two guards shifted uncomfortably from one foot to another, wanting no more to be elsewhere but Montage orders were absolute. They had families to take care of and by not doing what he wanted guaranteed their walking orders.
" Miss Athha…" The same guard from before opened his mouth but closed it immediately when Hinata shook her head, she herded the both of them out of Cagalli's office, promising them in hushed whispers that she would handle the situation and that they would not get into trouble. Glad that they had an excuse to go, both of them fled but the guard with brown eyes gave one more last lingering look at the teenager whom had been so brave and kind and went.
" Representative…." Hinata ventured.
Cagalli snorted but kept her silence as she continued to look out of the window admiring the view that she knew would no longer be there if Montage got his way. She wanted badly to fight back but there was nothing she could do when the council had voted, it was the rule, nobody wanted a leader who could not control her own council.
But, did they not realize the consequences? Do they not remember the war? The loss? The pain? The tears? The heartbreak? Have all of them forgotten so fast what it was to lose someone?
" Representative…" Hinata walked up towards the golden haired girl before laying a comforting hand on the girl's shoulder. " Please do not give up now, there is still so much to do and there are people who are willing to follow your lead if you just ask."
Cagalli gave a harsh, bitter laugh that was bordering on a sob before replying," First off, I'm no longer the Representative and there is nothing to give up anymore. There is so little time and now when Montage is planning to give Orb over to Plants, there is nothing I can do. With no power and no resources, what is there for me to fight back with?"
Hearing Cagalli admit defeat and looking so beaten, Hinata felt her chest constrict and yet there was nothing she could do or say to comfort the disappointed girl as she was helpless herself. Cagalli meant well, she only wanted the best for Orb but dreams would always stay dreams when people like Montage worked for his own benefit, the unfairness of everything angered her but in reality, people with money could make the world turn.
" I've failed you, father. I'm sorry." Closing her eyes, Cagalli whispered brokenly to the room as the rage fizzled out and reality seeped in, she could feel the tears springing up, blurring her vision, as she looked with empty eyes at the room that she had occupied and her father before her. Biting hard on her lip and drawing blood, Cagalli tried to keep the pain inside but a choked sob pulled free and everything came crumbling down as she fell to her knees, hands clutching at her both arms trying to find the support that was not there. Tears fell freely onto the carpet as Cagalli sobbed and Hinata who could not bear it anymore pulled the other girl into a tight hug. Feeling Cagalli's body shake with the emotion that she had been trying so hard to contain inside her, Hinata too could feel the tears come to her eyes and prayed for the first time in her entire life.
Kami sama, please save this country.
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Kira Yamato grimaced as he lowered himself in the bathtub filled with warm water, his muscles protesting painfully at his actions. He hated the after effects of the "symptoms", hated it with a vengeance, but there was nothing he could do except to accept. His body was changing that much he knew but into what he had no idea. He had illusions of himself becoming somebody with an extra pair of hands, extra limbs that dangled and scared everyone out of their wits, slobber dripping uncontrolled from a limp mouth, but what terrified him the most was him losing his mind, his wits.
It was bad enough when his friends in university found out that he was a Coordinator, earning him at times hushed whispers behind his back and instant silence when he appeared. He was one of the younger students in his class and quite a few had questioned his identity but Kira had merely smiled and allowed them to make their own conclusions, imagine the hoorah that would be created if he turned up a monster.
However, he would be kidding himself if he still thought that he was still cocooned in the peace that was previously there, it had left him when he had entered the science competition under his friends' persuasion, his classmates had come up to him to cheer him on, the attention had been pleasing, but what was unexpected was them winning. Kira knew their project was good, but he had not expected it to be the best as they had been competing internationally, with many other experienced veterans there. Lady Luck had really been on their side the whole time through and now when it was all over, Lady Luck had left him dry.
The hype surrounding the whole event had destroyed his thoughts of having a peaceful existence in university, his name was plastered in the newspapers, people he had no idea existed wanted to take pictures with him, wanted his autograph. It had been amusing in the first place, but later it had became irritating and now it was definitely condemning. He had no idea whatsoever that winning could promote him from Mr nobody to stardom.
But, Kira knew for a fact the main reason why he was being put on the pedestal as a semi god. It was the fact that he was a Coordinator and the other two in his group were Naturals. Many out there have this notion that it was him that had personally made the whole project the success that it was, most of them think that being a Coordinator, he was, no is, more superior than his group mates and that made them useless. Before all this happened, he had no qualms of admitting that he was a Coordinator, not here in Orb, but memories of the war made him wary, he did not want people to look at him with jealousy and fingers pointed whenever he ended up on top of his class and so he had voluntarily kept his being a Coordinator a secret.
Not that it had been any help now.
Flay Allaster and Sai Argyle, the two other friends he had made during his class in science were ignoring him just because the media were highlighting his achievements more than they were on them which was of course complete nonsense. He had tried to explain that it was not his fault that they were interested in him being a Coordinator, that his genes were better than the rest of them, he had not voluntarily chose the way for him to be born, but they refused to listen, wanting no more to listen to their own pettiness. He hated that feeling and lately, the loneliness was becoming too much to bear, especially when they, the two most popular students on campus were trying to make his life difficult. Kira now knew what it was to be on the receiving end of hostility, he had learnt the hard way to never underestimate the power of popularity, the consequences was not what a normal human being could endure. He had not told Nicol about his recent fate in university not wanting him to worry more than he had to and if Kira thought that was bad, what Nicol told him later was even worst. He would have preferred being a social outcast any time of the day, but now being forced to assume a role as the next superhero and a social outcast was something he had not signed up for. For that matter, he had no idea how to cope and not a clue what in the world his powers were. They were not manifesting themselves anytime soon and the only things as proof that they existed was the pain he had to endure every once in a while.
Frowning, Kira's body tensed again when he remembered the earlier assault, the pain was getting more and more intense and he was afraid that one day, even the medication would no longer work. The effects of the small vial was taking a longer time now to play its role and sighing, Kira sank deeper into the water until it covered all of him. He closed his eyes as he tried to relax, holding his breath under water for as long as he could, not knowing the reason as to this self torture before he resurfaced, gasping loudly for breath. Brushing away the brown locks of fringe that stuck to his face as the water dripped freely onto his body and back into the tub, Kira leant back onto the curved back, allowing himself to enjoy the water, letting time to pass by, emptying his mind of everything, just relaxing, something that he had not been able to do since the beginning of something akin to a nightmare.
Emerald eyes watching him fall.
Kira's closed eyes popped open as his heart skipped a beat and he could feel a blush creep up onto his cheeks, the thought of him thinking about another was a bit embarrassing and he was a boy no less. Kira was definitely not somebody who fell for beauty, there were many beautiful people around in his university, each and every one of them vying for his attention after that dreaded competition but it was that something that Kira saw behind the beauty, something haunting, ethereal, and not to mention the sadness that surrounded the other boy's presence. Kira had no idea why he thought the other sad, but Kira could sense underneath the cool exterior was something that nobody else saw and that mysterious quality made him want to find out more. Blue haired, tall, slim, with that aristocratic elegance, Athrun was no doubt lusted and adored from both near and afar, and that thought somehow made Kira's heart constrict within his chest.
Is this what you call jealousy?
A sudden knocking on the bathroom door woke him up from his musings as Nicol's familiar voice called from the other side of the door, " Kira, are you all right in there?"
" Yes. I'll be out soon. Sorry." Kira shouted sheepishly back, he had no idea he had been in the bathroom that long, but it was evident from the cold water that he had. Blocking and pushing all thoughts of the other teenager he had met earlier, he quickly rinsed off and stepped out of the bathtub. He had no time thinking about things other than school and his imminent fate. Dragging somebody like Athrun was unethical and he had no desire to bring innocent bystanders into a war that he did not even know what it was all about.
Sighing, Kira dried himself as fast as his aching muscles allowed him to before stepping out of the bathroom and into the air conditioned room, feeling the chill instantly. He noticed Nicol sitting on the bed and he smiled apologetically at his companion's slight frown, but said nothing. Nicol worried too much at times but Kira had no heart to say anything anytime soon, the selfishness of wanting to keep everything to himself a trait he had never tried to change. He grabbed his clothes from the chair that Nicol had laid it out on and went back into the bathroom to change, a heavy silence filling the whole room. It was slightly uncomfortable but there was nothing Kira had in mind to say and he was fine with the quietness.
Emerald green eyes.
Kira's lips quirked up into a slightly ironic smile as he pulled on his shirt, trying not to think about something that intrigued him was akin to being hungry and not eating what was in front of him. Athrun was staying here, he knew that when Elizabeth had mentioned in passing when they had booked their rooms. Maybe it was fate that allowed them to meet, although how much that four lettered word played a part in anything was something Kira did not care much about as he was much more a believer of cold hard facts than something as unrealistic, vague and distant a notion of what would and should happen.
As if knowing what the younger boy was thinking, Nicol's hand touched lightly on Kira shoulder as he appeared behind him in the bathroom, he was not one to not say what was on his mind," Don't even think about it Kira."
Pretending that he did not understand what Nicol was talking about, Kira turned around to face his friend with wide eyed innocence before asking, " What are you talking about? Don't think about what?"
" You know what I'm talking about, Kira. He's not somebody you can actually be with." Nicol said, his voice hard, eyes slightly accusing. He had known Kira practically his whole life, it was not hard to know what the brown haired boy was thinking and Kira was not a good liar, in fact, he was not at all someone who could lie at all.
But, more importantly, Nicol had been handed a responsibility to protect Kira by Meng sensei and he was not about to go against Meng's wishes. However, that would be unfair to Kira if he put it that way since it was not responsibility that kept Nicol there, it was because he loved Kira, he was the younger brother that he did not have and that was why he had to make sure that Kira was safe and sound. And so, it was up to him, it was in fact his duty to stop everything before anything could happen.
" I really don't understand what you are talking about, you have to be more specific." Kira challenged back, violet eyes staring unblinking at Nicol. Kira understood that Nicol was his guardian and there was no denying the fact that he was the one who looked out for him every time, but this time, he had no idea why Nicol was so adamant about him and Athrun. What's more, it was not as if Kira even knew that guy, he had barely even talked to him, and the only one thing he knew about that teen was his name.
Nicol frowned at Kira, his face grim, " Athrun. You have to stay away from him, you understand that much right?"
" Why are you so against that person? According to you, he saved me, why is it that I can't befriend somebody who saved my life?"
" Are you sure that the only thing that you want is friendship?"
Shocked, Kira stared at Nicol, " What is that supposed to mean?"
" You tell me Kira. But stay away from him, that's all I want to say, it's up to you to listen but this is my warning to you. You've seen Yvette's reaction and his, he doesn't even recognize his own mother and I don't doubt that he's armed, his reaction to everything is too controlled, too calculating. He's been trained, Kira, and I don't know why he is here but Yvette knew Patrick and his presence here seems too coincidental."
Silence filled the air once again as Kira, finding nothing to say, merely looked mutely at Nicol before nodding reluctantly. What he said made sense and although Kira hated to admit it, there was too much of truth in Nicol's statement but he did not want to give up so easily. There was so much hidden, buried deeply where no one else could see unless they dug deep, and Kira's heart, no matter what Nicol had just said, whispered to him to search under that exterior, to give that teenager a chance. He did not know why he was so interested or why he wanted to know more either, it was an instinct, a craving to know and not to mention an attraction that he could not deny.
Nicol sighed inwardly at Kira's expression, the steely, determined look in his violet eyes that gave away what Kira was thinking. Nicol hated to know that Kira was about to go against his advice, but knowing Kira, he had to let him burn for him to learn. At times, it was the only way, but, Nicol had a very bad feeling, his sixth sense telling him that he had to stop them no matter what. Nicol did not understand why he was so wary with this teenager as usually it was Kira who was the one who worried, who was the wary, quiet, observant one, but now in this case, it was the total opposite.
Nicol could see the attraction between the both of them, he would be a certified blind if he could not. He had noticed Kira's violet orbs when they were still in the same room, they could not help looking at the other raven haired teenager even if Kira had tried to hide it and looked when he thought no one was looking, while the other was more daring, more blatant in his interest. Athrun had been eyeing Kira with a want that made Nicol nervous. The kiss was more proof of what Athrun intended, it was unneeded, there were other more conventional ways but instead Athrun had chosen that specific way and Nicol was damned if he got Athrun's intention wrong.
Nicol left Kira alone in the bathroom to brood over what he had just said and Kira, relieved that Nicol was no longer behind him allowed himself to relax. He hated it when Nicol was right but this time he was not about to blindly follow orders, Kira was feeling extremely rebellious since this was the only thing that he could choose. He could not choose to be born a Natural, he could not choose to be an ordinary person, but maybe, maybe he could choose to be attracted to this stranger. To hell with the consequences, he just needed a little respite from everything, and this would be a short fling, one of the shortest he know, since he would be leaving within a few days, after Nicol gets his information from Yvette.
Making up his mind, Kira felt a burden lifted from his shoulders, not thinking and just heading for it straight on was dangerous but it was easier on the brain, he did not want to think about the matter any longer, he had been thinking too much for too long. Smiling as he looked at himself in the mirror, he wondered if he would bump into Athrun later and allowed himself to fantasize like an idiot about what he could say. Deciding to take a walk later in the night and wanting to check on Yvette, Kira not knowingly sealed his own fate by taking this one reckless step.
The one reckless step towards a fatal attraction.
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It was two hours after dinner, when Kira still feeling extremely bloated from the scrumptious dinner that Elizabeth had prepared had excused himself from the room both Nicol and he were staying in. Sleepily, Nicol had volunteered to come with him but Kira had insisted that he was all right alone and politely declined. He wanted some time alone and Nicol was tired from the looks of the number of yawns during dinner merely nodded, putting up no fuss as Kira had expected that he would.
Shrugging on his jacket that he had hung over the chair earlier, Kira walked down the hallway, pausing to look at the pictures that adorned the wall. He paused when he saw the picture that contained the lone sakura tree and for some strange reason felt sad. The picture seemed so lonely although it was peaceful, it seemed perfect for a place to rest finally, but the leaves that fell seemed like tears that cried for the lost life, the lost time, floating desolately down blown by the gentle wind, slowly, slowly before settling at the bottom of the tree, caressing the ground and was fated to rot as time passed by.
Touching the picture, he wondered what the photographer had been thinking, what had prompted him or her to capture this picture and where had this sakura tree been, why had it been alone, wondering if it was anywhere nearby, feeling a desire to visit it. Kira gave it one last look, making up his mind to ask Elizabeth about it later and continued on his journey out.
Stepping out into the cool night and shivering as the warmth of the building left him, Kira pulled the jacket closer to his body before starting to walk. The night was clear as the moonlight shone down, dappling the surfaces and providing the light Kira needed to find his way. It was quiet with only the sound of the crickets nearby, and the crisp night air was refreshing, his body had adapted to the cold and following the path towards Yvette's cottage, Kira was enjoying the night walk. Mid way though, he caught sight of a familiar figure walking briskly, hands in pockets, in the precise same direction and he stopped in surprise.
Athrun?
Realizing that it was the teenager that he had been fantasizing about before, Kira felt the heat rise to his face and his heart started to beat faster as nervousness overcame him. He had wanted to meet Athrun but thinking it and it happening was so much different; in his illusions he was cool, calm, collected and could hold any conversation with any stranger without any qualms, but in reality it was a totally different thing. He would be thankful if he did not have him fainting at Athrun's feet once again.
However, on second thought, Kira's forehead creased to form a slight frown as he puzzled onto the reason why Athrun was here in the first place at this time of night. Yvette had specifically wanted them to leave so why is he here again? It was after all because of him that Yvette became so emotional, if Kira had not heard wrongly, Yvette had seemed to know Athrun during that short conversation when all three of them were in the same room and Nicol did say that Athrun was Yvette's son. To Kira, everything was progressing at an abnormal speed, rushing towards an end that seemed hell bent on destruction.
But, you are here, maybe he's here with the same motive, to see if she's all right.
Kira shook his head to clear the train of thoughts and decided to find out for himself personally, it was a waste of time if he just merely speculated and made conclusions that had no basis. Walking as quietly as he could as to not attract attention, he waited till Athrun was in front of the cottage and was about to go in but before he could continue, Athrun turned around suddenly as if sensing somebody's else presence which prompted Kira to duck instantly behind one of the trees that thankfully were there, praying hard that he would not be detected. Somehow, his instincts told him that there were things that were about to enfold and if he was there, they would be thwarted.
A few minutes passed as one searched and the other hid before Athrun satisfied that it was just the wind went on with his business. His hand snaked behind his back out of habit, checking, before he knocked, twice that resounded in the silent night. Kira, whom was nearby heard the sounds clearly and waited with bated breath, counting slowly from one to ten, giving Athrun and Yvette time for both of them to react to Athrun's presence before he himself came out from hiding.
Creeping slowly towards the cottage, Kira did not know that it was about to be a night where hidden secrets were about to be revealed.
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Yvette Carpenter stood silently by the open window, her solitary shadow, the only accompaniment she had growing long behind her as the light filtered out of the skies. Soon, it would be dark and she knew that he would come soon. Dinner at Elizabeth's bed and breakfast was at seven, she would be expecting his company around nine or so. The moon was beautiful, hanging in the sky pale and alone like her, the normally bright stars that blinked and winked at her when she stared outside nowhere to be seen.
Yvette allowed the images of him to flood through her brain, numbing herself towards the coldness of his eyes whenever she remembered his face. He had grown into such a handsome boy, he had always had the beauty surrounding him but now it was honed to a deadly combination. His innocence, long ago plastered so carefree on his face was gone, hidden, shielded by the stone walls that she could see that he had erected around himself. For protection? In order to stay alive? Yvette wondered and knew for sure that it was indeed for those exact reasons those walls were there. Her heart ached with the pain of a mother who had never been there for her son, the tears she had hidden from everyone glimmering unshed in her eyes.
How had his life been those few years? Had he cried for her? Had he missed her?
Yvette wiped the moisture from her eyes with the back of her hand, she had no right to cry when she had been the one who had betrayed her son. She had no right to question his memories of her, who would want to remember a person who had left them to fend for themselves? Her emerald eyes were shadowed by an internal anguish and the forever regret of her past actions as she stared hollowly, emptily out into the scenery that had soothed her before not too long ago, remembering a long ago past that she had forsaken because of her cowardice and selfishness, her conscience coming back with a vengeance drumming into her what haunted her every night and day without fail.
"Mommy? Are we going somewhere?" A three year old asked sleepily from where he had fallen asleep on the bed, awakened by the noise Yvette generated from her fear.
" No, baby, mommy's going away for awhile." Yvette whispered, her face a mask of terror as she looked back upon her shoulder frequently to check if Patrick was anywhere near her. He had finally made up his mind to kill her as he had personally, gleefully told her when he had paused her before she went upstairs, that her usage was up and that Athrun would no longer need her. He had laughed, no cackled like a madman as he walked out the door, leaving her trembling at the stairways. Never in her life had she been so afraid, so scared. She had never wanted to die, even if she was trapped here, she did not want death, she was not willing to go down just like that.
Athrun sensing something was wrong, pushed himself into an upright position, sleep immediately gone from his eyes as he stared at her with those brilliant jewels, widening as time passed by as he watched on in confusion while Yvette hurriedly stuffed everything that she had into the duffel that she had along with her. Her hand paused at the picture frame that contained the lone photo that she had with her son, trembling as she tried to make up her mind on whether to take it or not. However, the sound of footsteps made her skip the object and grabbed at things that were more important than mere sentiment.
" Mommy? Where are you going? Has Athrun been bad? You are not bringing Athrun along as well?" He asked tearfully, his three year old mentality allowing himself only to be able to ask, not understanding why his mother was acting so distant, so cold.
Athrun's question made her stop, his innocent confusion tearing her heart apart. She turned around to look at her child, her baby, eyes softening as she pulled him into a warm embrace, the last one she knew she was able to give him. She loved him but at the same time she loved life more, she knew she had time to escape tonight, she had taken the necessary steps to do so. Poisoning Patrick had been out of the question, he was too cautious a person but she knew the weakness of the device he used to test his food before consuming it. He trusted no one and she knew that she had to be careful.
" Mommy don't go, please? Don't leave me alone. I promise that I would be better, so don't go ne? I don't want to be alone with him…he scares me." Athrun's small voice spoke up from her bosom, his eyes staring forlornly at hers, pleading with her, begging her not to go and if she did decide to go to bring him along. Yvette's eyes glimmered with tears as she tried hard to blink them back, Athrun's small hand lifted up from where he was to brush away those runaways, softly, gently, knowing that he could hurt his mother if he put more strength. His actions made Yvette's resolve waver, but the hate that she had before overpowered everything.
It was because of this child that her lover was dead. It was because of this child that she was trapped here. It was also because of this child that so many others were dead.
Yvette's nodded mutely with averted eyes, comforting the young child but not daring to look, eyes hardening perceptibly. She could not afford to take him, he was a hindrance, he would be the one pulling her down, people would notice him. Who wouldn't? With his angelic looks, he was bound to attract unwanted attention. She would have to leave him behind, she hated the thought that Patrick would have the son she had brought up, loved and hated with all her heart. However, survival instincts overcame her motherly instincts and she hardened her heart towards his innocence eyes staring so heartbroken and trusting at her.
Forgive me Athrun, but this time. Let me be free of everything.
And so, she had left her baby alone to fend for himself at the mouth of the monster.
Yvette regretted her decision almost immediately when she had turned back that night to see his pale face staring out of the window as she ran away, hand on the windowpane, stretching out to her, hoping that her would once again take his hand and save him. She had been his last hope.
And yet, she had deserted him.
Yvette had known that he had not cried, but she knew that he had been in his heart, that betrayal killing everything. She forced herself to push away the image but that face had never stopped haunting her from then on. She, as a mother had allowed her selfishness and hatred to overcome what her heart told her to do. Her logic finally telling her what she had refused to admit when she was there.
Athrun was the only thing that kept her alive those few years.
Not only had she blamed her fate on an innocent young child, she had allowed that monster to eat her baby alive, swallowing everything and spitting out merely a shadow of the boy that had been so inquisitive, so alive. The present Athrun she saw was no longer that young boy from her memories, he was a living, breathing human that looked like him but there was nothing humanly on him. He was akin to a dead man walking, a boy living on time that was no longer his to live. His life, Yvette knew, was Patrick's, the choices, the path paved for him, everything was done by that devil and Athrun, had no choice but to follow in order to stay alive.
Yvette understood very well how Patrick hated rubbish. He was willing to sacrifice everything in order for him to create this one perfect specimen, and Patrick would force anybody around him to live at that furious, relentless pace till nothing was left of the other. Her baby was the living proof of his evilness but Yvette knew that she had no right to put the blame on him alone, she was the one who had left him there and for that she would accept whatever price, whatever punishment that Athrun had come to put on her. She had no doubt that Patrick had finally found her, even after all those years and Athrun was the judge and punisher.
"Are you trying to die?" Elizabeth had asked her once, long ago when she had not been able to crawl out of the hole that she had created for herself. She still remembered her answer as clearly as it was yesterday.
"No," She had said, eyes vacant and empty as she stared in front of her, " I'm not worthy of dying and I'm not trying to look for death, instead, I'm waiting for death to come."
And what she had said then was true, she had worn most of her life away, worn herself away, searching and searching for the one thing that she thought could make her forget everything in the past. But, nothing could change the past, nothing could change the facts that had happened. At a certain point, she knew she should have stopped living, stopped breathing, stopped hoping for the day that her son would come and forgive her, but she could not give up on life, not yet, that hope that Athrun could come and get her was too precious to give up on.
To see him smile that beautiful smile once again.
A slight movement outside caught her attention, Yvette squinted her eyes to try to see better and a shadow slowly emerged from the pathway that connected her small cottage to the main building. Yvette looked at the clock, noting the time and her face softened into a small smile, sad but it also contained the relief of someone who had been carrying a heavy burden for so many years and was finally able to face up to what they have done wrong. Her waiting had finally come to an end and the death that she had been waiting for for so long was finally here, right at her front doorstep.
Opening the front door, two pairs of emerald eyes looked at each other and Yvette said softly to the teenager standing in front of her, " Welcome, my son."
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Author's note: What's about to be revealed between Yvette and Athrun? Would Athrun remember his own mother and accept her? What would Kira find out and would there be any consequences? As the saying goes, curiousity kills the cat.
