A/N: I'm trying to get chapters up quicker now, so here's chapter
12! This one is dedicated to: Snowbear, Risifruttiii, s3xy-Lady,
Missa07, LunaML, and invisible cappucino conspiracy.
Oh god, were Hermione's first thoughts when she woke up. I really am a lesbian now, she thought to herself, as if admitting it to someone made it more real than it had been before. In a way though it was, by admitting it to Ginny, she had admitted it to herself.
A sudden rush of worry and nausea washed over her and Hermione closed her eyes, why oh why oh why did she have to be different? She was an outsider now, one of those people that other people give strange looks to while passing them in the street; people that other people talk about behind their backs. Hermione didn't ask to be gay, she didn't want to be gay, but here she was, gay as ever and stuck that way.
I'm different from everyone in this school, she thought and opened her eyes again suddenly feeling horribly alone. Moving into a sitting position she glanced out the window. It was early in the morning and most of the other girls in her year were still sleeping; other normal girls, who never had to worry about their sexuality. It made Hermione aware of the fact that there's only one person inside your head, you. And just you, all alone, never to know what's truly going on beyond the boundaries of your body.
But, she wasn't completely alone, she had Ginny. She wasn't the only person in this whole school was a lesbian. Hermione felt relief wash over her, she was not alone. And besides, no one had to know that she was a lesbian. She could wait until she graduated Hogwarts and was out in the real world, and even then she didn't have to tell anyone. She was still a normal person. She was a normal person. The fact that she liked the same gender was only a small difference, she wasn't an outcast.
Having reassured herself Hermione now felt ready to face the day and climbed out of bed grabbing some robes and towel from her trunk as she headed towards the bathroom to shower. When her shower was over, Hermione dressed quickly and went down into the common room where Crookshanks promptly got up from his spot by the fireplace and trotted over to her with a happy meow.
"Morning to you too," Hermione said leaning down to pick him up. He purred happily and she walked back over and sat down on the sofa in front of the fireplace.
Ginny, out of all the people Hermione would have suspected in this school to be gay, Ginny was one of the last ones. Amazing, how you can know someone for so long and not know something like that. Then again, no one knew or suspected that Hermione was gay; strange how life changes as you get older. Remembering how close they'd been that other day she blushed, remembered that intensity there'd been when their eyes had locked. Jesus, what if they'd kissed? What if, when Harry had walked down the hallway, he'd seen them kissing? Did she want to kiss Ginny?
This thought surprised Hermione, but then she'd also almost expected it. Her initial reaction was to shove away these kind of thoughts, fearing them and thus keeping them out of her mind, but Hermione was sick of being afraid of her thoughts. Hermione had never thought of Ginny as anything less than a friend, never thought of her as Ron's little sister. She'd always seen her as strong and smart, fun to be around. Beautiful? Hermione paused before deciding, yes, beautiful, beautiful in her own tomboyish sort of way. Tomboys were actually sort of hot, Hermione let herself admit. She smiled, deciding it was fun sort of to think about girls, fun to let herself think about whatever she wanted. If God wanted to send her to hell for the way he made her, so be it, but she was not going to live her life in denial and fear.
"Morning Hermione," she heard Ginny say suddenly and was jerked out of her thoughts. The object of her thoughts sat down on the sofa next to her and reached over to rub Crookshanks behind the ears.
"He likes that," Hermione told her with a smile.
"Hey 'mione," Ron said sitting down next to Hermione in the Great Hall where Hermione had spread out several books and was taking notes.
"Hey Ron," she said without looking up.
Feeling Ron scoot closer to her she glanced over at him with a questioning look. He glanced at what she was working on.
"What professor gave you this much homework over the weekend?" he inquired.
"It's not homework," Hermione admitted.
"Then what is it?" Ron asked incredulously.
"A paper," Hermione said, "On the mistreatment of sentient magical creatures. Professor McGonagall said she'd edit it for me."
"Why?" Ron asked glancing around, "It's the weekend, wouldn't you rather be doing something else?"
"No, I like writing," Hermione told him, "I'm planning on sending this to the Ministry. Did you come here to pester me on my work habits or what?"
"Oh, no," Ron admitted, "I wanted to see if you wanted to go swimming."
"Swimming?" Hermione questioned raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, with Harry and everyone," Ron added, "It's going to start getting cold any day now and we thought we should take advantage of the heat while it lasts."
"Okay, maybe," Hermione said, "I'll meet you out there in an hour."
"An hour?" Ron protested. Hermione gave him a stern look and he relented, standing up and leaving the Great Hall.
An hour later Hermione pulled out her bathing suit with a look of distaste. Her cousin had gotten her a yellow bikini with red flowers and having no other bathing suit Hermione had packed it, not expecting to actually use it. Sighing she grabbed a towel and went into the bathroom to change.
