xX Talking Body Xx

Xx Chapter 11: If I Die Young xX


The next day proved to be very, very awkward.

Lucy couldn't look Natsu the eye at all without feeling her cheeks flame. Every time he spoke, she could feel her body heat up, his seductive tone from the previous night ringing in her eyes and bouncing around her mind. All she could picture was him on the phone, possibly just as hot and bothered as she was.

Frankly, it was embarrassing as hell.

Here he was, talking all normally like he did everyday, and she was hyper-aware of every movement he made, oversensitive to his casual touch, practically having an eargasm when she heard the slight, but prominent timbre of his voice.

So when he dropped an arm over her shoulder, sliding his legs in her lap - like he was sliding into someone's private life - and pressing his lips to her ear so he could whisper something, Lucy freaked the hell out.

She wasted absolutely no time in pushing him off of her and onto the floor. The restaurant quieted down and watched as Natsu scrambled to get to his feet and plop himself in the chair across from her as Lucy hyperventilated and fanned her heated face.

One: Yes, they were those kinds of people who sat next to each other instead of across when they went out to eat.

Two: Natsu most likely had a bruised tailbone.

Three: Lucy was pretty sure that she was having a heart attack.

Natsu glared at the people who stared at them, nearly screaming if they wanted to fight. No one stepped forward, and he took that as his cue to back down, instead turning to pat Lucy on the head as she tried to calm herself down. He obviously didn't know how to comfort someone when they were quite possibly close to dying right then and there.

"What was that about?" he asked when Lucy finally gathered her bearings, numbly munching on a french fry. Idly, she thought that this may have been the first time she had went out in casual clothing with him. He always either pulled her away from work, or caught her in her pajamas.

And no, pajamas weren't casual clothing. They were nightclothes, as she had to beat that into Natsu's thick skull when he protested.

Lucy shifted to pull her thighs from the leather seat, her shorts riding scandalously high for a teacher. 'A sexy teacher' as Cana would eloquently put, and then add something along the lines of 'she could wear whatever the fuck she wanted because she was rich, bitch'.

Ah Cana. She wasn't even there, and Lucy could still hear her voice.

That, or she was schizophrenic, and the voice in her head sounded suspiciously like her roommate.

Which really...wasn't a good thing, now that she thought about it.

"Are you gonna come back any time soon? Kinda lonely here," she heard Natsu say, and Lucy jerked back into reality. Her eyes refocused on his grinning face, and the blonde blushed in embarrassment.

"Sorry, just thinking."

"Well think out loud. I want to hear what's going on in that big head of yours."

"Excuse you!"

"What? It's true!"

Lucy scowled in his direction, and the pinkette burst into explosive laughter, startling her and everyone around them.

"So, why are you weird today? Well, weirder than normal," he asked, shoving his burger in his mouth and taking a rather large bite. One would think Lucy would've been used to his habit of nearly eating his hand and everything around it, but she really wasn't. It still disgusted her, even to this day.

Mostly because she couldn't do it herself.

"I'm not weird," she grumbled.

"Says you. But seriously, what's wrong?"

She debated telling him about their little 'chat'. "It's nothing, really. Just wondering how the kids did on their test this week."

"You suck as a teacher. Kids hate tests."

"You're only saying that because you hate it too."

"And that's why I know kids hate tests."

"You realize you just called yourself a big kid."

"And...? Am I supposed to say I'm not? That's a fat load of shit and you know it."

"Language!"

They descended into a comfortable silence, Lucy poking around her strawberry milkshake, and Natsu watching her thoughtfully. To be honest, she felt a little unnerved under his surprising sharp gaze, but she wasn't at all uncomfortable with it.

It was weird, sure, but the stripper never looked twice at a girl. Not even when they were tripping over their own toes to fall into his arms (literally, unsurprisingly, for quite a few mouths ate the concrete when they tried). So when Natsu looked at her so intently, his eyes running over her face and storing the image into his memory card, she felt strangely...good-looking.

Don't get her wrong, Lucy was confident in her looks - being the daughter of a former model ensured that she would grow up pretty. But despite having men always ask for her number, she still felt insecure about her appearance. She wondered if her eyes were too large, if her eyelashes were too short, if anyone could see the little mole just under her chin, were her lips too thin, oh goodness she wasn't wearing enough foundation, would they notice? Little things like that always pressured her into looking her absolute best, even if she was in the comfort of her own home.

Natsu...the way he looked at her made her throw all of her insecurities to the wind with a big 'eff you' and a crude hand gesture. He made her feel good about herself without having to say anything. She didn't know what it was, but he didn't look like he was judging her for forgoing lip gloss that day. He looked at her like he knew what women went through to look beautiful, and he silently told her that he didn't care, that she was beautiful in her own way, and if anyone told her differently, he'd throw them in the trash and tell them to stay where they belonged.

He was too sweet. And Lucy felt unworthy of his friendship.

That was why she forcibly tampered her heart to a steady beat when she was around him.

He gave a light chuckle, and Lucy looked at him questioningly, still sipping her milkshake.

"I was just thinking that I got a call last night, and the client reminded me of you."

All of the beverage that was in her mouth, was now all over the table. Pink really clashed well with light brown, apparently.

Natsu leaned back in disgust as the blonde fumbled for napkins. Mavis, she was really making a mess of her reputation today.

"Ew! What was that for?!" the stripped asked, tossing a salt packet onto the liquid playfully, and Lucy glared at him as she wiped the table.

"F-For springing that on me so quickly! You didn't even give me time to prepare!" Prepare her mind and body. Great, just when she thought she was finally easing back into the works with him, he had to go and remind her how awkward she was.

"You don't need to prepare to listen to me talk about my night!"

"Considering who you are, one can never be too careful."

"Was that an insult?"

"I'll let you figure that out."

Natsu shrugged. "Anyway, before I was so rudely interrupted by your nasty ass spit-take - shit, now I got milkshake on my scarf - I was gonna say that the chick I was talking to hung up early."

Yep. That was definitely her.

"H-How do you know it was a girl?"

The pyromaniac looked at her, gestured to himself, and pointed to his phone. In Natsu speak, that meant that Pillow Talk only served women, and they had sites for men who enjoyed the company of other men.

How she was able to figure that out, the world may never know.

"Plus, she sounded like a girl. If it was a dude, well...his balls need to drop, like, ASAP," the stripper grumbled, and Lucy looked at him. "Anyway, it was funny because she ended the call before it could get dirty. It reminded me of the time you ran out of the club when I was taking my pants off."

"You really, really didn't need to remind me." He seemed to like shoving that down her throat. Natsu grinned.

"After that, I kept picturing you. The chick stuttered because she was nervous, and she thought she could play it off by asking questions and trying to make herself seem experienced. It didn't work."

Obviously.

"I-I have a confession," Lucy muttered, solidly hiding behind her purse. Natsu once told her that she could fit three babies and a sofa in it, to which she countered that she could only fit two babies, or one toddler.

She didn't explain.

"The chick you're talking about-"

"Lemme guess, you were in the room with her?"

"No. I was her."

He was silent.

"Well shit. I was wrong."

"You thought I was in the room with her - with me?" the blonde stumbled.

"Well, yeah? It was something you would do, so I thought that you had something to do with it." He grinned that stupid, stupid grin that made her breaths harsher. "Usually when a person calls, they don't hang up until the end. Never thought it would be you though." Lucy flamed and shoved her face into the rosy scent of her baby-bag of a purse. How embarrassing!

She looked up when Natsu tapped her head and leaned forward, way too close for her liking.

"I'm good at my job, so tell me, how was it?"

If the ground could open up and swallow her now, that would be great. Thanks.
...

"Salamander!"

"Who the hell let you in, Metalhead?!"

"We got fuckin' problems! Where do you get off tellin' Shrimp that we need to fuck?!"

"Well you need to! I'm tired of you guys dancing around your issues! Just fuck already!"

"Listen little bitch, I'm workin' on it!"

A crash.

"Don't call me a bitch!"

"So you don't mind the 'little' bit? Geehee, I should've known you wouldn't, since the shit's true and all."

"I'll fuck you up!"

"You can try!" More crashing.

"You broke my plant!"

"Fuckin' good! Potted plants are gay!"

"Says the guy who has a picture of his panther if it was buff blown up in the middle of his living room!"

"You leave Lily out of this!"

"I forgot his name was Lily. And you wanna get on me about my plants?"

"Fuck you!"

"Fuck you!"

"Fuck you more!"

"Fuck you more!"

"Listen you two, it seems like you need to hash out your differences in the bedroom. Want me to leave so you can started?"

"You can just go fuck yourself, Vanilla Ice!"

"Vanilla Ice, Screwdriver? I don't get it."

"You know, Ice Ice Baby? The song? It's made by Vanilla Ice."

"Then why not just say-"

"You can shut the fuck up!"
...

Gajeel had only been in 'Salamander's' house a handful of times. And each time he came over, they managed to break one of the plants, which forced an altercation, and then the walk of shame to the backyard where seven more potted plants sat on the porch.

'Fuckin' tree hugger' was what the man had called her friend as he took said walk of shame.

Every time the pierced construction worker showed up at the house, 'Pinky' always found his door off its hinges and digging into the floorboards at an uneven angle. This caused yet another fight between the rivals, which, more often than not, ended up having Gajeel fix it until it could at least sit right enough to close it. Then Natsu would have to call a professional ("Gajeel can't fix shit." "Fuck you, Hot Shit." "I'm gonna take that as a compliment.") and listen to the man talk about some stuff that made him question his purpose in the world.

And for some reason, every time he came over, sex was always brought up. Never between Gajeel and Levy, never between Natsu and a random girl.

No, it was always between the two of them.

Lucy didn't know how to feel about that.

So as she sat on the couch, nursing a light beer - it was the weekend, screw the consequences - watching the two men clash, trying to process all that she had learned already, as Gray-freaking-Fullbuster sat next to her, all she could say was:

"Gajeel has such beautiful hair..."

And that stopped everyone in their tracks. Lucy blushed.

"Like...It's so long and thick-"

"Like my d-"

"Don't go there," Gray interrupted Gajeel.

Lucy shifted.

Ten minutes into seeing Gajeel behave, and she already regretted asking to meet him.

After Natsu had teased her mercilessly about pretending to be a customer, they had parted for the day and Lucy had felt thoroughly disturbed at just how easy it was for him to joke about awkward things like that, even more so with how easily she let him. If it were anyone else, she might've kicked them.

Before they had went their separate ways, however, she had blurted, "Can I meet this Gajeel?" before she could stop herself. Natsu had looked at her weirdly before shrugging. "Sure," he had said, "but I won't be responsible for any injuries you get when he shows up."

Usually saying something like that would deter her, cause her to back out and say it wasn't worth it. But this wasn't for her, it was for Levy. As she had said before, Levy only deserved the best.

And from what she was seeing now, Gajeel was not the best at all.

Lucy wanted to sip some tea, but beer would have to do for the moment.

"So you're Lucy huh?" she heard Gray ask as he slid an arm over the back of the sofa. There was nothing flirtatious about the action, but still, the blonde found herself scooting forward and away from the man. He was Juvia's fantasy, and it felt sort of like betraying a friend. And Natsu had told her that he had a habit of taking off his clothes.

So far he was only missing his shirt, socks, hat, and had his pants unbuttoned. From what she had heard, the guy could end up naked, and wouldn't notice until someone pointed it out. More often than not, it was Natsu, who threw the cactus at his head when the man had entered and immediately stripped free of his shirt.

He'd make a great addition to Majikku, Lucy idly thought. He took off his clothes faster than Jackal.

"I am Lucy," she responded, turning to face the model. "You know about me?"

"Are you kidding? Flamiac won't shut up about you, and Loke has a shrine in the corner of his living room."

She had told the ginger dozens of times to destroy the thing. Obviously he hadn't listened.

She'd kick him.

"You know Loke? How?" she asked, taking a swig of her beer.

"Mutual friends."

"Apparently everyone knows everyone in these parts." She smiled dryly, turning the bottle in her hands. "Everyone except for me, that is."

Gray chuckled and watched as Natsu drop-kicked Gajeel. The construction worker was sent flying. "It's alright. I was just like you at one point. Everyone was friends with everyone, and then there was me, broke and looking for a job."

"So how did you become a model?"

"He fucked one of the photographers," she heard Gajeel say from the kitchen right before a plate went sailing through the air. Natsu ducked under it, and Gray shoved her head down before she could get hit. It crashed into the wall, and the pieces slid behind the couch.

"No he didn't!" Natsu said, moving the couch and grabbing the largest shard he could find before pushing them back in place and moving towards the kitchen. "He jacked one of them off, I think."

"I did neither of those things! The woman - not man - said I had a good face and body! She took a few pictures and said I was hired," Gray said, just as Gajeel cried out when he saw Natsu with the plate piece. The pink-haired man stabbed it in his general direction and Gajeel broke an empty beer bottle, holding it threateningly.

"Same difference. You just didn't fuck her yet. You did after."

"I didn't have sex with her! Period!"

Lucy sipped her beer, still wishing for some tea.

Gray's phone let out an obnoxious cry, which sounded strangely like a baby, and he reached in his pocket. Lifting the device to his ear with a wince, he breathed-

"I don't want any excuses Gray Fullbuster! You better tell me why you haven't called me in a week!" Lucy heard the person - who was most definitely a woman - scream.

"Your statements are contradicting. No excuses you say, and immediately demand an excuse-"

"Oh so now you're getting smart with me?!"

"I'm not! I-"

"Is that Natsu in the background?" Lucy wondered why the man felt the need to have his phone so loud. She could hear everything, even over the sound of wood splintering. One look in the kitchen, and she saw Gajeel throwing the table at the pinkette, and Natsu was hit square in the...everywhere.

Who even threw a table?

"Natsu and Gajeel. I'm on the couch."

"Yes, I can see that," a voice said from the hallway. Everyone stopped and looked, seeing a duffle bag drop to the floor next to heels that Lucy could only imagine wearing without breaking her ankles.

Brown clashed with blue, and Lucy felt something in her stutter at the radiant beauty standing before them.

"RiRi has arrived after several decades!" she said, brightly.

"It's only been a few months-" Gray started, but was interrupted by a pink and tan blur barreling straight into the visitor.

Lucy only had time to breathe around the lump in her throat before Natsu picked the woman up and spun her around, listening to her tinkling laughter. "Who is...?"

"Lisanna! You're back!" Natsu said,

"Who's Lisanna?" she asked, darting her eyes towards the spinning pair.

"Only Natsu's lover," Gajeel said, grinning, and Lucy felt something in her jerk one last time before falling very, very low.


1. I'M BACK BITCHES. Temporarily.

2. Dun dun dun? Cliffhanger? What the hell are you doing Bonnie?

3. Hello potty mouth. Nice to see you make an appearance in this chapter. Sorrynotsorry.

4. Hey Wolfie! There he is! How you like him? Quite a character isn't he? And Troll, you deserve to be credited for this madness too.

5. Chapter. Before you say 'ugh, not this bitch again', I happen to really like Lisanna. I will do her character justice and not make her a bitch because she isn't and leave my daughter alone! Also before you say 'why do they have to be in a relationship?', wait until the next chapter and let me explain. She's just as important as everyone else in this story people, don't click away because you see something you don't like. Or you can click away now, and come back during the steamy bits. You'd be missing fun stuff though.

6. I get so offended when I say 'Thank You', and no one responds with 'You're welcome'. Like uhm, I'm taking energy out of my soul to be grateful, bitch you better acknowledge it with a sound or something.

7. Seriously Clyde? Couldn't resist a jab at me over the internet? Sleep with one eye open, punk.

8. Yes, I added memes in there somewhere. I like them. They fit.

9. To all of the guests that reviewed and wished me a speedy recovery, freaking make an account so I thank you properly! So sweet, you all, I just want to shove you in my armoire and never let you out! No creepo of course.

10. Which brings me to everyone who supported me. Thank you so fucking (whoops) much. I was so worried you all would yell at me to get going and not make you wait. I was afraid you all would stop reading because I be MIA sometimes. But that wasn't the case and I'm so damn relieved.

11. So review and let me call you all cinnamon buns. And tell Clyde he should be worried about me shanking him in his sleep. I'll send you to the Fade, big brother.