Gone chapter 12
"Spence, what am I goanna do?" I ask him at a sudden moment, I just felt the baby kick me and it triggered a thousand questions. Spence turns his head and looks at me with confusion. "What do you mean?" He asks me and I sigh deeply. "I am pregnant, I am having a child, his child. She won't have a father, what am I goanna do?" I repeat slowly. "Abby, this is not his child anymore. This is your child and yours only." Spence answers simply and I shake my head, how much I want to believe that. "It isn't, it's his child too. I don't know if I can do this, raising her on my own." I whisper, a tear rolling down my cheek sadly. Spencer wipes it away and kisses me on the cheek. "You will not have to do it alone honey, you'll have me. I will help you as much as I can. This is your child, he has no rights anymore. He killed eight women and is goanna be locked up for the rest of his life, he has no right." He assures me and I smile at him, I knew he would say that.
"You don't have to, you know that don't you?" I tell him and he nods, smiling back. "I know, but that doesn't mean I won't, I will do everything you need me to do." He responds and I shake my head, but can't hide my smile. "I love you." I tell him and he sighs, rolling his eyes playfully. "And I love you." He says and wipes away my tears.
Eventually we both fall asleep in the bed and do not wake up until the nurse walks in at six am to change his bandage. "Oh dear, I don't think this is allowed to happen." She tells me after she woke me up and I quickly apologise to her. "Oh honey, it doesn't matter with me." She assures me and orders me out of the room to get some food for myself while she changes Spence's bandage.
I do as I am told and walk downstairs to the cafeteria. When I arrive there, I see to my surprise Morgan and Emily, sitting at a table, eating breakfast. "What are you doing here so early?" I ask them while walking closer and they both look up. "Hey Abby, we thought that it couldn't hurt to come here to support you and visit Reid." Morgan answers me with a wink and Emily smiles at me. "How is he doing?" She asks me while I sit down beside them. "He's doing fine, well accept for the bruises and the wound." I tell them and feel tears coming up again, but I force them back. "Good, that's good." Emily mumbles to herself and I nod slowly. "Abby?" Morgan asks me and I hear concern in his voice. "Yes Morgan?" I reply with a smile. "Well, we still have Kyle under interrogation but because Hotch questioned him yesterday evening, we can't keep him that long anymore. To be precisely, only till four this afternoon." He tells me and I look up. "Okay, then I'm going to the police station in a minute, so you can visit Spencer." I tell him and suddenly feel very scared. I never thought I would once become scared of my husband when I married him, but it happened, and how. I don't want to go and see Kyle, but I know I have to. I need to know the exact reason, otherwise I won't be able to live with it.
I eat my breakfast and then I decide that it's now ore never and leave the hospital, sure that Spence is in safe hands with his two FBI friends. I call a taxi and let it bring me home first, not thinking about what I will see if I get there. There are still yellow lines spread around my house, with 'crime scene' on them, but it's my house so I walk past them. I open the front door, not expecting anything to happen. I walk into the living room and that's when I see it. A big red stain of blood still lies on my living room floor, Spence's blood. I gasp when I see it and quickly turn away from it, it hurts like hell to see it.
I try not to think about Kyle much when I walk upstairs to the bathroom, but everything reminds me of him, everything. In the shower I break down and start sobbing while sitting down in the bathtub. I need to progress this, but right at the moment it hurts so much my heart is goanna break again. A murderer, a monster lived in this house and I know that I can't stay in this house, it will haunt me down till my death.
I get out of the shower when I'm calmed down again and dress myself. It's quit warm outside, I didn't even notice that.
I walk back downstairs and realise that it's time. Time to face my demon, time to face the monster that ruined my life and ruined my baby's life. I still can't understand why he would do this to me, to his baby. Well, it isn't his baby anymore, he lost all his rights. I walk outside and get in to my car. It's time and I have to watch my emotions, I don't want to show him weakness. I don't know how, but when I realised Kyle was the murderer, my heart stopped loving him. It's weird actually, cause a couple weeks ago I thought I would spend the rest of my life with him, but now I don't even love him anymore. Maybe a little part of me does, but the bigger part of me hates him and feels disgust.
I drive down to the police station and park my car. I breathe in deeply and then walk towards the entrance. The closer I get to Kyle, the sadder I get and the harder it gets to hold back my emotions.