Jim was smiling, he was feeling good about things as he started making preparations for their date, and then he got a text.

Pam: Hey, excited for this, but I have an uncomfortable question

Jim: No, you cannot bring Michael, that's a deal breaker

Pam: Ha ha, but seriously, are you and Karen together?

Jim: Beesly, of course not, I broke up with her, I realized I was still in love with someone else

Pam: Did you love her?

Jim: Wow, these are some heavy texts, can you call me?

Jim's phone sounded, "Beesly, I know things are tough, but sort of like you and a former warehouse worker, I realized I wasn't with the right person, I tried, I tried to love her, I feel bad, but at the end of the day, I would never feel for her what I feel for you.

"Wow, that's a lot of pressure, but I get it. I just never wanted anyone to get hurt."

Jim sighed, "I know, but you and I both went on unhappy with other people, so we end up hurting ourselves and them, I just decided it was time to give us a try. Are you okay with that?"

He thought he could hear Pam cry, "yes, it's what I've wanted, but like I said, a lot of pressure."

"Pam, I know you, I know you better than I know anyone else, you are my best friend, you are my favorite person, I've seen your temper, I've seen your dorky dance moves, and I've watched you with someone that was wrong for you, so I know, that if I don't give it a chance, I will regret it for the rest of my life."

"Yeah, me too, but what if it doesn't work out."

"Whoa, Beesly, I'm focused on tonight, one day at a time. Let's see how tonight goes, and then we can scare ourselves with thoughts of the future."

"Okay, you're right. I really am happy Jim, it just sucks that the path to one date has hurt other people."

"I know, but if we're unhappy with other people, we're not being fair to them either, divorce is even uglier."

"Okay, you said you're picking me up at five?"

"Yes, is that okay?"

"Absolutely it is."

Jim laughed, "see you at five Beesly."

"You better be on time, first impressions go a long way with me."

"You got it."

Jim pulled into his driveway and ran in the house, as he scrambled around picking up a few things, he called Mark.

"Jim, what's up, I haven't talked to you in a while, with your new lady friend."

"She and I broke up today."

"Sorry to hear, you need to get a beer?"

Jim chuckled, "um, no, I'm seeing Pam tonight, I finally realized I couldn't hold a grudge, I'm still in love with her, so I asked her out, after I broke up with Karen. We're going out tonight. Does Nikki's sister still work at Posh? Because I need a big favor."

Mark laughed, "she does, what time do you want? She actually owes me a favor, I got her boyfriend a job working at my office."

"Sweet, seven thirty, I'm taking her to a few places first."

"I can't believe you two are finally going out, it seemed like a no brainer when I met her at your party. God, that seems like years ago now."

Jim sighed, "I know, but it was necessary, I needed, she needed it."

"How'd the break up go?"

"It sucked, I hated to hurt her, but I will never feel for her what I do for Pam. I should have done it earlier, but I was trying to convince myself I wasn't in love with her still."

"I'm happy for you, can I tell Alan, he's been telling me for months you need to bite the bullet and ask out Pam."

Jim laughed, "yeah, and also tell him to be good to my sister or Tom, Pete, and I are going to hurt him."

"Will do, seven thirty, be there, I'll let you know if it can't happen, but like I said, she owes me big."

"Thanks Mark, bye."

Jim changed into his lucky khaki pants and a sport coat Karen convinced him to buy because he looked hot in it, he felt a pang of guilt but smiled when he thought of Pam. He grabbed his wallet and keys and ran to his car. He drove to the florist down the street and ran inside, the florist smiled as Jim ordered three dozen flowers and a huge teddy bear.

Jim pulled into the Dunder Mifflin Parking lot, and took the elevator to the third floor, but didn't go into the office, instead he went into Vance Refrigeration and paid Gino and Leo twenty bucks a piece to set up the flowers, teddy bear, and some chairs on the roof. Jim glanced at his watch, four forty-five, he ran down the stairs to his car to avoid Stanly on the elevator leaving early. He grabbed the last items and then made his way back to the roof.

At five on the dot, he called the office phone, "Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam."

"Pam, this is Jim, I need you to come up to the roof for phase one of our date."

"The roof? Jim are you cheaping out and making another sandwich?"

"No, I am not, but I still need you here."

Three minutes later, a confused Pam appeared on the roof, "Jim?"

Jim was seated in a chair next to three vases, one of yellow roses, on of yellow lilies, and one of red roses, with the teddy bear behind them. Jim motioned for her to come sit next to him. As she sat, he took her hand in his, she didn't shrink or get nervous, it felt natural to both of them, he took a second to take in her look of surprise and affection.

Jim took a deep breath before speaking, "Pam, before we start being us, we have to admit that errors or mistakes were made, by both of us, but I don't see the need to address those anymore, but this is my way of making up for not telling you how I truly felt earlier. These are gifts for each of the four Valentines days I could have possibly spent with you had I been truthful. I don't need apologies, I don't need to talk about it, I just need you to know that you are all I have ever wanted, your intelligence, your talents, your humor, your kindness, I knew from the first day I met you, and even though I tried to convince myself otherwise, I have always known it.

Their first kiss had taken place beneath them and changed everything, Jim left and dated Karen while Pam called off her wedding and started anew, but their second kiss would change everything as it was the beginning of them. Pam cupped his cheeks in her hands, she whispered thank you and then kissed him, they started softly at first, but then as each of them had the events of their time together as friends, the intensity picked up as Pam was the first to explore Jim's mouth with her tongue, at first gently, and then harder as her emotions and feelings for him poured out, Jim pulled her closer, one hand behind her head in her hair.

Jim pulled back smiling, he took her hand in his again, Pam smiled back, a single tear streaking down her cheek as she looked at him. "So, these items, we can pick up at the end of our date, I got the security code to get in. Leo at Vance sneaks in here all the time, so he gave it to me for twenty bucks. We have reservations at Posh at seven thirty, my old roommate Mark has connections there, but in the meantime, I want to take to you to a few place where I should have told you how I felt. The roof is the first." Pam hugged him again, tears in her eyes as the frustrations the two had felt for each other were now seemingly evolving into whatever lay ahead of them.

"How did you do this? You just ended things with Karen today?"

Jim smiled at her, "Beesly, I know you, we have a history, it's why I knew today, that I had to act, that nothing else would make me happy. I thought of some of it while I drove, and then when we texted and talked, the rest came to me, this is our way of starting together while acknowledging the past without dwelling in it, if that makes sense?"

Pam kissed him tenderly, "it makes perfect sense."

The two of them descended the ladder and took the stairs down, making sure no one saw them, trying to avoid awkward comments, or as Jim pointed out, worse than normal awkward comments since between Michael and Kevin, they had like three lifetimes worth of sexual harassment complaints stored up.

They made small talk and joked around as they drove to the first location, Pam looked around as she got out of the car and saw the dry cleaners and the creepy diner no one seemed to eat at, and then she saw it, the dojo where Michael and Dwight had battled, and where Jim made Pam uncomfortable.

"Beesly, the dojo, where I tickled and picked you up and you felt uncomfortable, this is yet another place where I should I have told you how I felt, why I wanted to pick you up, why I felt so comfortable with you. I'm not like that with most people, but we connected so quickly, hour senses of humor, we just seemed to understand one another."

This time Pam took his hand in hers, she looked up at him shyly, "this is when I first knew I had some feelings for you, more than just great friends, I got so upset and overreacted because I liked it, too much, and I didn't like myself for that. God, I was so attached to my plans, marrying Roy despite everything."

Jim embraced her, and then surprised her by picking her up again, like he had that day nearly two years earlier. "Pam, I like you, a lot." He set her down, she was smiling at him, shaking her head, he smiled back, "there, another past failure remedied."

As they drove to the next location, Jim held her hand as he drove, and Pam leaned over and rest her head on his shoulder, amazed at how perfect she thought it felt, that it never felt this way with Roy, and he wasn't so skinny like Jim, but this, it felt right. As they continued to drive, Pam was confused about their next destination.

"Where are you taking me now Halpert? Burying the body after all the pain I caused?" She joked, but a hint of sadness lingered in her gaze.

Jim glanced at her, he shook his head, "Pam, I was angry, but I was also stupid, we both needed to find our way to each other, it took time. You are still you, but you are the you I always knew you could be, independent, standing up for yourself and using your awesome artistic talent. I needed to be with Karen to know that even though she was great, that no one else could claim what was yours?"

Pam squinted her eyes at him in confusion, "what was mine?"

Jim chuckled very softly, "my heart, it was yours since the day I met you. I tried, fuck Pam, I tried, but it was yours and it kept calling me back."

Pam undid her seatbelt and knelt towards Jim as she kissed his neck and the side of his face. Jim finally put out his arm, "Beesly, buckle up and you'll kill us both, that was very distracting, very appreciated, but these roads are curvy."

Pam sat back down and buckled up again, "Jim, I just today came to peace with us, as friends, but I think what I really did was come to peace with how we hurt each other, you're right, it had to happen. I needed to know I was the one for you, but I also needed to find out who I was again. It hurt to see you with Karen, a lot, but right when I would get angry, I remembered what you went through seeing me with Roy. And I realized, that was harder, at least with Karen, she was good, she was fun, Roy, he was so wrong for me, but he was all I knew, and I was scared to leave it."

Jim place his hand on her leg, "all in the past, we have one last place to visit, and then we can start new, as us, leaving all this crap behind us, but the thing is, my mom used to have a cheesy line she'd feed her kids when we got down or thought life was unfair. She'd say that the crap, was necessary, like the fertilizer on the fields, it wasn't pleasant, but it made the results better, the crops, flowers or whatever. I remember one time, I told her that didn't make sense, she got really mad and finally shouted that we had to go through the shit to get to the good parts, and that's true."

Pam gasped when she saw the sign for the lake, the very lake where the Booze Cruise had been, and Jim had wanted to tell her something, she knew what it was, but she was scared, and then Roy got so drunk he finally agreed to set a date for the wedding. "Jim, no, we don't have to go here, I was so stupid, so scared."

Jim nodded, "and so was I, I brought Katy because I thought she could take my mind off of you, but that failed miserably, all I saw was a reminder of how she paled in comparison to everything I loved about you."

Pam looked at him, again the shy look returned, a hint of fear and uncertainty, "love?"

Jim sighed and nodded again, "yeah, Beesly, love. I knew, but I was so scared and uncertain. We both were, I used to place so much blame on you, but we both were, we saw what we wanted and let it dangle in front of us. I need the lake to tell you what I should have then."

As they approached the parking lot for the lake, Jim parked the car, and held both of Pam's hands in hers. He looked at her, with a look that almost scared Pam as much as it delighted her, she knew that look, she had seen it in him before and just like before, it made her uncertain if she was good enough for that look, but then she thought of what they had both been through, and the many changes she had made.

"Beesly, I know you're with Roy, again, this is back then Jim's words, but I'm in love with you. I have been in love with you. I know you have some similar feelings, and I know it's scary, but I would do anything to be with you, to see your smile and hear your laughter outside of work, to have my hand be the one you hold, to have my shoulder be the one you cry on. I can't just be your friend Jim anymore, it's too much to take when I feel the way I do."

Pam's tears were running freely now, she took his face in her hands and brought it down, so she could kiss him, trying to release in the kiss the many feelings she had hidden for so long but now longed to release and hold on to in a different way. "God, you're a dork and adorable all at once, but I love that about you. Jim, I'm scared, I know I'm in love with you as well, but it's a lot of pressure."

Jim sighed but grinned, "I kind of know what you mean, what if we date on the down low, we tell no one else, we either go to eat away from the others or just hang at our places, assuming that you, Pamela Beesly, would like to date me."

Pam kissed him again, her hands almost hurting him as the grabbed onto his hair to give her the intensity she desired. Jim pulled back a minute later, "wow, that was, wow, but I will need verbal confirmation on the dating thing."

Pam shook her head while her hands were up and clasped behind his neck, "yes, James Halpert, I will date you, on the down low. So romantic."

Jim laughed, "I know, it sounds unromantic, but it's way more romantic than Michael asking us about our sex lives or Kevin awkwardly mentioning that he likes your boobs too, all things I've heard before by the way."

Pam blushed, "yeah, and that's the milder stuff, but did you also mention our sex lives?"

It was now Jim's turn to blush, he gulped as his throat felt dry, "it was just a comment, not anything else, oh shit."

Pam laughed as she gently caressed his face with one hand, "I'm just giving you a hard time, look, normally I'm all for taking things slow, part of me wants that still, but the other part of me wants to make up for lost time, I want everything I've been missing, so let's just see where things end up tonight, no rules, no judgements, we've been way too patient waiting for this."

Jim pressed his forehead down against hers, "Beesly, you're a genius, I agree." Jim glanced at his watch, "we'd better get moving, our reservation is in an hour and a half, I picked you up straight from work, you look great, but if you want, not a comment on how you look, I always like that, but if you want, you can change or whatever, god, I sound pathetic."

Pam gave him a quick kiss, "no, you're fine, I would like to change, luckily, I have on dress that I look great in ready to go, we're going to a nice place, and you look really good, I don't want to be out done, not that I could compete."

"Beesly just know that I think you are beautiful, the most beautiful to me in fact, but our relationship is so much more than just looks, it's everything about you."

Pam laughed, "This is so weird and yet so right at the same time, I will not be bringing up our exes much, but the thing that made me the angriest at myself is that I had more romantic, truly romantic, not sexual, interactions with you as a friend than I ever did with Roy, nine years with Roy, I feel like I'm finally giving myself permission to be happy."