Two days later, Carol was returning back from her morning visit to Maggie and the baby when she saw some commotion at the main gate. For a few moments, panic coursed through her body, only to be followed seconds later by the internal battle tactics that were ever present in the back of her mind. She looked around the compound mentally recalling all of the places she'd hidden various weapons. Her hands flew to the knife hooked on her belt, her fingers curling around the cool handle before she started to move forward, making her way towards the gate.
She stopped suddenly when she spotted Daryl, her eyes drifting over his broad shoulders as he spoke to one of the other residents. Whenever she saw him anywhere near the gate or heading out on a hunt, she still felt that twinge of irrational worry well up inside her. She'd tried so hard not to smother him with her need to keep him close...but since Hershel's birth, she couldn't seem to let go of the anxiousness that one day Daryl wouldn't return to her. It was misplaced fear, and she knew those feelings had no place in their new life, but she loved him so much that it scared her. It was terrifying just how so intertwined they had become. She was in so deep; too far gone to ever be without him, and that mere thought alone was enough to send her heart racing. She had never loved anyone, other than Sophia, this much.
As if he could sense her watching him, he turned to look behind him, his eyes finding hers. The happiness in his gaze melted all of her fears away when she saw him making his way towards her. She couldn't help but return his smile with a bright one of her own when he pulled her into his arms and pressed his lips to hers in a brief kiss before they pulled apart again.
"Jesus is back. He's got four people with him...we can't make out who yet...but..."
"Rick?" Carol asked him, her smile growing wider as she pulled out of his arms only to grab his hand. "Is it them?"
"I think so," Daryl gasped out excitedly when they started to move, making their way towards the gate. "C'mon."
Carol gripped his hand tighter when they practically ran towards the car when it drove into the compound, coming to a stop just inside so that the gate could be closed again. When the doors opened to reveal several members of their family, Carol released Daryl's hand with a gleeful chuckle when him and Rick practically launched themselves at each other. Shaking her head, Carol moved towards Michonne, both women laughing happily as they hugged each other tightly before pulling apart to witness the reunion between the two brothers.
"Hey, it's good to see you," Michonne grinned, her smile bright. "You look great..."
"Thanks," Carol laughed happily. "So do you…"
"So how's life with the redneck?" Michonne asked with a sly grin as she nudged Carol's shoulder. "You look happy."
"I am," Carol's eyes lingered over the two men and couldn't contain her delight. "I really am."
She met Michonne's knowing gaze. The two women had become friends not only because they were family, but because they were both competent warriors. A mutual love and respect had forged their relationship some time ago, and the men they loved had only solidified everything else. Standing by Michonne's side, Carol sighed contentedly as her grin grew even wider when Carl came around to them and threw his arms around her.
"Carl…" Carol cried his name, her voice caught somewhere between a laugh and a sob as she held on tight to the young man in her arms for a few more moments, before she withdrew, standing back a little so she could get a proper look at him. Carol regarded him for a long moment. He looked so different from how he was a few months ago before they left Alexandria. He had grown into a fine young man, even though when she looked at him, she still saw that little boy she'd met on the road. Reaching up, she ruffled his hair a little and shook her head in happiness as she grinned at him, unable to contain the joy coursing through her. "You've gotten taller."
"Or maybe you've gotten shorter," he chuckled brightly, and for a moment Carol could see so much of Lori in his eyes. "You look good, Carol."
"It's so good to see you, sweetheart," she told him softly. "I've missed you."
"Me too," he grinned. "We were gonna bring you some chocolate, but Tara used it all on some weird shit...she said they were supposed to be cookies...but..."
"Oh?" Carol laughed when she saw the look of disgust on his face. "That good, huh?"
"I miss your cooking…"
Shaking her head, Carol patted his face affectionately and then she saw Enid coming around from behind the car to stand beside Carl, smiling at her. Before Carol could offer any greeting of her own, she suddenly found herself engulfed in Rick's arms, being held so tightly that she had to fight to breathe.
"Carol…" he sobbed out her name, rocking her from side to side as he suddenly lifted her off the ground to swing her around, before placing her back onto her feet.
"I missed you too," she giggled when he finally let her go only to keep a hold of her hands. "It's so good to see you…"
"You look good," Rick grinned, his gaze lingering over her face. "You both look really good."
Carol blushed under his scrutiny and lowered her gaze briefly before she glanced back up at him and squeezed his hand. "How long are you here?"
"Couple of days at the most," he smiled. "Tara offered to look after Judith for us, so we thought it'd give us time to catch up with you two and see Maggie and the baby."
When Daryl came to stand beside Carol, his hand sliding over the small of her back, she smiled at Rick before she leaned back into Daryl's chest. "Do you want to stay with us?"
Daryl nodded, his face one big grin as he slipped his arm over her shoulders. "Yeah, we've got a spare room for you and Chonne, and two couches for the kids...c'mon man, it'd be like old times."
Rick met Michonne's approving eyes and nodded his head with a bright smile. "Okay then, thank you."
"Okay," Daryl nodded happily. "Bring your stuff to our place and we'll take you to see Maggie and Hershel."
"Hershel?" Rick asked, his breath hitching in his throat. "That's…he..."
"He's beautiful," Carol nodded, clutching his fingers tightly as she spoke. "And Maggie is doing really well too."
"C'mon," Daryl squeezed Carol's shoulder before he pulled his hand away and gestured for Rick to follow him as he walked towards the car. "Grab your stuff."
Rick released Carol's hand, his affectionate smile still lingering on his face. He could already see the subtle changes in the couple who had left a few months ago to begin their new lives...his brother was practically living the domestic life now, and that thought alone brought a measure of happiness to his heart. Nodding towards Michonne, he took her offered hand and followed her to the trunk of the car, grabbing the bags they'd brought with them.
000
As soon as they got to the house, Carol pushed the door open and indicated for Michonne to follow her. She turned to tell Daryl that he could take the new arrivals over to see Maggie and the baby, but stopped in her tracks when she saw that the two men were lagging a fair distance behind. When Michonne followed her gaze, she grinned widely when the other woman chuckled at the sight. Rick and Daryl were in a deep conversation, laughing and making hand gestures as they spoke… and behind them, the two teenagers followed, bumping shoulders while they walked.
"Daryl's missed him," Carol smiled as she shook her head incredulously. "It's times like these when I've miss texting! They could have kept in touch that way instead of waiting like this."
"Yeah," Michonne grinned. "It'd save me having to listen to Rick pining every day!"
"You too, huh?"
"Oh yeah," Michonne shook her head as she followed Carol into the house. "They'll catch up when they realise we've gone."
Carol was finding it hard to contain her happiness when she lead Michonne to the second bedroom, opening the door wide so they could step inside.
"There's space in the closet if you want to hang anything up," Carol told her as she walked across to open the drapes a little wider so that more light could spill into the room. Moving to open the small window, she propped it wide before she turned back to the woman who was looking around the room in approval.
"It's nice," Michonne smiled as she placed her bag onto the bed. "I like it."
"We do too," Carol nodded as she looked around the room as she broke into a smile. "Come on, I'll show you the rest of the house...there's not much of it, so it'll be quick!"
By the time Rick, Daryl and the two teenagers reached the house, Carol already had the kettle boiling. Her gaze fell onto Daryl when he walked into the kitchen, his eyes bright as he walked towards her.
"Rick's got ya some eggs," he grinned proudly when he came to stand beside her. "Told him ya'd like 'em."
"Really?" she gasped, delighted at the prospect of having some fresh eggs instead of the powdered variety they had been eating.
"Yeah…"
Carol's eyes drifted across to Rick who was standing in the kitchen doorway grinning like a mad man as he unzipped his bag to lift out a small bundle of material, handling it carefully. He stepped towards Carol and held the precious offering out to her, with a proud smile.
"Here, I got you six fresh ones. I was telling Daryl we found some chickens a few months back. We've got a few chicks now...we'll bring you some when they're big enough."
Carol took the bundle from his hands and laid it on the counter, unwrapping it carefully as she moved the fabric aside. She couldn't help the small gasp of delight when she placed the eggs, one by one into an empty bowl beside the sink.
"Thank you," she beamed, her wide smile lighting her features as she stood back to look at the oval shells. "I can't remember the last time we had a real egg."
Daryl watched her adoringly as she turned towards him. Her smile was contagious, and when she slipped her arm around his waist, he tugged her into his side and pressed his lips against her temple.
"Where are the kids?" Carol asked him as she melted into his side.
"I showed 'em where the boardgames and books are," he told her, his words disappearing into her hair. "Thought they'd prefer that than bein' in here with us."
"Hmm…" she sighed, blissfully aware that their guests were watching their every move with more than a little amusement. She could already feel the blush creeping over her cheeks but she was far too happy to care. She leaned into him, relishing the feel of his warmth against her body as she pressed a kiss against his throat, her lips grazing his skin before she pulled away from him to nudge his shoulder.
"Why don't you show Rick around while I make us some coffee," she told him softly. "Then we'll go over to see Maggie and Hershel."
"Okay," he nodded, his eyes lingering over hers for a few moments before he squeezed her hand one more time, then let go of her to guide Rick out of the door.
The two men ended up outside in the yard after Daryl had given Rick the tour. They were standing beside the mismatched fence, mugs in hand while Daryl pointed out the work he'd done on the house.
"It suits you," Rick told him as he lifted his mug to his lips, swallowing down a mouthful of warm liquid. "You two look happy."
"Yeah, we are," Daryl smiled, looking down into his mug. "It feels like I've been waiting my whole life for this, y'know…"
"Yeah I do, brother," Rick nodded, smiling wistfully as he watched his brother proudly. "You two were always headed for this life."
"Ya think so, huh?" Daryl grinned, a blush creeping over his face. "Since when?"
"Back at the farm. I think we all saw it...but I knew for sure when she busted us out of terminus," Rick sighed as he remembered how they all owed her their lives, and that he owed her so much more. "That woman is a force of nature."
"Yeah, she is," Daryl looked down into his mug thoughtfully, grateful for the chance to convey his worries to Rick. "She's had...a hard time with some stuff though."
"Is she okay?"
"Yeah," Daryl sighed. "But, since the baby...I don't know, she's been upset about us not being able to have a kid...I told her I ain't worried about that stuff...but…"
"Yeah, I hear ya brother. Chonne and me, we've been trying you know, but it might never happen for us either...but, that doesn't stop her wanting it."
"I wish I could just make her see we don't need a kid to make us, y'know," Daryl looked towards the house with a yearning smile. "She's enough for me."
"Maybe the two of you need to sit down and see what's really going on there, brother. You ever thought she's worried you'll leave her for a younger woman who can have children?"
"The fuck…"
Rick held his hand up to silence Daryl's protest. "Think of it from her point of view. She was married to an abuser who told her every day she was worthless. You hear that day in, day out, it begins to stick...you know that yourself from what you went through too…"
Daryl's eyes flared with understanding, Rick's words sinking in. What if there was some truth to it and Carol was just waiting for another woman to turn his head? He knew that wouldn't never happen, ever...but...
"I love that woman like family," Rick told him as he gestured towards the house. "But she went through a lot of shit before you two hooked up. Just give her some time, she'll be okay...you both will…"
"I ain't gonna leave her for no one," Daryl growled out adamantly. "I gotta make her understand that…"
"Well brother," Rick grinned, his hand landing on Daryl's shoulder. "Just keep looking at her the way you do and you'll be fine!"
"Fuck off!" Daryl guffawed, shaking his head as he looked back towards the house.
Rick grinned widely, teasing his brother came so easily. He'd missed him more than he ever thought he would. Squeezing Daryl's shoulder affectionately, he hoped he had helped in some way. He could remember how Lori became obsessed with having a baby before they had Carl. He knew how much it tore at both of them when month after month they got a negative result…
"You're both gonna be ok, brother," Rick reassured him as they made their way back towards the door. "You two, you're solid...and you know how I know that?"
Daryl looked at him, his mouth opening to speak but instead he just shook his head and waited for Rick to enlighten him.
"You've lived together for six months and you're still all over each other like a couple of newlyweds...and if you're still that close, after all this time, you're gonna make it."
Daryl watched on in surprise when Rick slapped his shoulder affectionately before he pushed the front door open again to step inside, leaving his brother to stand in silence as his advice slowly sank in. A slow smile burned on Daryl's lips as when he turned to follow Rick back into the house, and back to the woman he loved.
000
Maggie was sitting in a chair rocking the baby when she heard Carol's familiar knock on her doorframe. Lifting her eyes from Hershel's sleeping face she looked up to see the older woman standing in the doorway, her smile brighter than usual.
"Hey, sweetie, is it okay to come in?"
"Of course," Maggie beamed. "You don't have to ask."
"Well, you've got a few visitors waiting to see you," Carol told her, lowering her voice as she moved closer to Maggie's side, peering down at the sleeping child.
"Visitors?"
Before Carol could answer, Daryl appeared in the doorway, knocking on the doorframe only to move aside to reveal Rick and Michonne, followed closely by Carl and Enid.
"Rick…" Maggie gasped out, her eyes flitting between him and Michonne. Her lips suddenly quivered, overcome with so many emotions that she couldn't contain.
"Hey," he grinned, his own eyes wet with tears as he moved closer to kneel down onto the floor beside her to look down at the baby in her arms. "He's beautiful, Maggie."
"He looks like his daddy," Michonne gasped as she peered over Rick's shoulder, her look of awe matching the man beside her.
"Would you like to hold him?" Maggie asked, lifting her son out to Michonne who took him without hesitation. She grinned brightly, motioning for Carl and Enid to come and look at the infant, while she rocked him from side to side.
Carol caught Daryl's gaze and smiled when he took a step backwards. Nodding her head, Carol looked to Maggie and the other's as she moved to stand beside him, watching the family scene before her before she took his hand and followed him out of the room.
000
They walked slowly back towards their house, shoulders bumping together as they moved. Daryl slipped his arm over her shoulder and pulled her into his side as they walked, grinning down at the woman beside him when she glanced up at him.
"It's good to see them," she smiled. "I think Rick missed you."
"Been a while," he nodded, tugging her closer. "Good to see 'em though."
"Yeah," she sighed happily. "It really is...Rick and Michonne are happy."
"Mmm," he nodded, his mind going over his discussion he'd had with Rick earlier. He hadn't realised that there could be some other reason why Carol was so upset about them not having a kid together. He just loved her, it was that simple for him. He wished she could see just how much he craved her, even from afar, and that no other woman would ever come close to her...he just didn't know how to reassure her.
"I spoke to Doctor Carson when I saw Maggie this morning," she started as she reached up to thread her fingers through his on her shoulder. "He asked if I wanted to take on more hours at the infirmary now Maggie doesn't need me as much."
"That makes sense," he nodded. "Do you want to?"
Sighing heavily, she stopped walking, pulling him to a halt beside her and slipped her hand away from his. He looked down at her questioningly when he saw the turmoil in her eyes.
"I don't know...I mean, I'd like to learn some more, and I can still be here for Maggie...but if I take up his offer he wants me to go to the kingdom to get some experience with their doctor. He was a surgeon before the turn and Carson thinks I could help with the any minor surgeries here." When she finished speaking, she watched for his reaction as she gripped hold of his hand.
His eyes clouded over with the weight of her words. He could already feel his heart thumping wildly inside his chest…she was leaving? What if she decided she wanted to stay? What then?
"It'll only be for two or three weeks," she told him as she squeezed his fingers. "I know it isn't long but he thinks I could learn a lot from assisting with the doctor there." When he still hadn't answered, she pulled on his hand, her eyes capturing his. "So what do you think? Do you think there's enough people here that can take over from you while we're away?"
Daryl blinked rapidly as her words slowly sunk in. She was watching him with far too bright eyes, her worry ever present when she saw his pale face. His mouth opened as he tried to formulate a sentence but he couldn't seem to find his voice. So instead he settled for stepping closer towards her so that they were toe to toe.
"Daryl?" she whispered worriedly. "What…"
His mouth was on hers before she could finish, stealing her words from her lips. Her mouth opened beneath his, her soft gasp disappearing as their kiss deepened. Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew they shouldn't be doing this here, not kissing like this in full view of everyone, but he was intoxicating…
When the need to breathe finally forced them apart, they were panting heavily, breaths mingling as he rested his forehead against hers.
"I thought…" he started, but the words trailed away when he realised that his insecurities held no place here anymore. "Yeah, I'll make 'em do without me. I ain't gonna stay here without ya…"
Slow recognition filtered through to Carol's mind when she suddenly understood why he had kissed her so desperately.
"I love you," she whispered softly, her eyes holding his gaze as she spoke. "There's no way I would even consider going to the kingdom without you...I won't...ever…"
"I know," he grinned as he lifted his head to place his lips against her forehead in a brief kiss before he moved back to take her hand in his again. "C'mon…"
"Where are we going?" she giggled, her eyes alight with happiness.
"Where I shoulda taken ya before I went out huntin' this mornin'," he grinned as he tugged on her hand and lead her back towards their house.
000
That night, they had just finished eating the venison steaks and potatoes that Carol had cooked them for dinner, when Rick lifted his wine glass off the table, holding it up.
"To the cook for a truly great meal. You have been missed," he grinned as he caught Carol's eyes. "I mean it Carol...no one cooks like you."
Carol blushed and lowered her eyes to her own wine glass and picked it up. Her cheeks were flushed after downing two glasses of the Merlot wine that Rick had brought with him. She lifted her glass, grinning brightly. "To the bringer of the wine...we missed you too."
Daryl's eyes flittered to the woman he loved, his gaze scanning over the contours of her beautiful face. His mind drifted back to the conversation he'd had with Rick earlier, and as the day wore on, he couldn't seem to get them out of his mind. He loved her, he really and truly loved her...he knew there wouldn't ever be any other woman in his life, certainly not one who would turn his head or lead him away from Carol...he had been at a loss of what to do to convince her of his commitment to her, until she told him about the kingdom and that's when it hit him...he knew what he had to do...what he should have done months ago. He turned towards her as she chuckled at something Michonne had muttered to Rick, before he reached out a hand to wrap his fingers around hers.
When she turned to him, her eyes bright and full of love, he shifted forward and brought her fingers to his lips and pressed a kiss onto her knuckles.
"I wanna marry ya," he told her, his voice croaking out the words that had sounded so much more romantic in his head. "I mean...I…"
Carol swallowed heavily, her eyes searching his as he grasped her hand like she was going to slip away if he didn't. Turning in her seat, she shifted herself forward until their knees were touching, forgetting that there was anyone else in the room. Her hand moved to his face, her fingers tracing the fine lines around his cheeks as she blinked back the tears in her eyes.
"Yes…" she told him in a soft whisper as she laughed and cried at the same time. "Yes…"
"Oh my god, did you two just…" Rick placed his glass back onto the table and looked to the couple sitting opposite.
"I think they did," Michonne gasped, her mouth hanging open when her two friends surged towards one another, wrapping their arms tightly around each other, both of them lost between small sobs and laughter as they slowly pulled apart.
It was Rick who got to his feet first, unable to stop his eyes flooding with tears. He moved around the table, desperate to congratulate the couple. He gathered Carol up in his arms, holding onto her in a tight embrace as he rocked her from side to side, whispering her name over and over into her ear. Michonne pulled Daryl into a firm hug, her happiness spurring tears to fall down her cheeks as she held him tight.
"Congratulations," Rick gasped out when he pulled back to press a kiss to Carol's temple before he moved onto Daryl, enclosing his brother in a firm hug while Michonne grabbed hold of Carol's hand.
The two women held onto each other while they watched the two brother's pull apart, both of them laughing as the congratulations flowed.
"I'm so happy for both of you," Rick grinned. "It's a pity the kids decided to stay with Maggie. Carl's gonna be pissed he missed this!"
Daryl shook his head and looked towards the woman he loved, holding out his hand to her. Carol smiled happily when she moved away from Michonne to take Daryl's hand, melting into his side as he slipped an arm over her shoulders.
"I know we don't need a weddin' to be married and I ain't got ya a wedding ring or nothin' yet," he told her. "But…"
Rick cleared his throat as he slipped his arm from Michonne's waist and moved towards the door. "I think I can maybe help you with that...just...hang on..."
Three sets of eyes watched him questioningly as he turned on his heel and practically skipped out of the door. When he returned a minute later, he was holding onto a gold chain that dangled between his fingers with two wedding rings threaded through it, clinking together. He unclasped the chain link and slipped the rings into his palm, his eyes pouring over them for a few seconds before he shoved his hand towards Daryl.
"I've been holding onto these, and I wasn't really sure what to do with them...but now…"
"Rick…" Carol gasped out his name when she focused on the two gold rings that rested in his palm. Swallowing hard, she regarded him fondly, watching the emotion welling in his eyes.
"They were mine and Lori's," he told them, as his eyes lifted to Carol who was looking between the two gold rings and him. "I know she would want you to have her ring, Carol...you were more than just a friend to her… and after she...when I went back to find her...after…"
"Rick," Carol's eyes swam with tears as she eyed the rings he held in his hand. She knew that after Lori died, Rick went into the cell blocks a broken man, only to come back out again full of grief.
"She would have wanted you to have it, Carol...and I know I would be damn proud for you to have mine, brother."
Daryl eyed the gold wedding bands for a few moments before he reached out with cautious fingers to take them from Rick's palm. "Are ya sure?"
"I'm sure," Rick nodded as he glanced back at Michonne, offering her a watery smile before turning back to Daryl. "Nothing I'd like more."
Daryl held the rings in between his fingers and lifted his gaze to the woman he loved, his eyes filling with emotion. He held his hand out to her, palm side up and waited for her to respond. Swallowing heavily he watched as she reached out to take the larger ring from his hand and sniffed back the sob that tried to escape from her lips. Reaching for his left hand, she slipped the golden band onto his finger while she lifted her eyes to his.
"I love you Daryl Dixon, you know that right?"
His mouth opened when he looked at the ring on his finger, nodding his head frantically before he grasped for her hand, holding onto her for a few moments before he slipped the matching ring over her delicate finger. He'd never been able to formulate his feelings into words; he'd always managed to mess things up, but as he looked upon her with so much love in his eyes, he couldn't help the tremble in his voice.
"Never knew what love was 'til ya'll showed me," he told her, surprised that the words didn't stumble on his tongue. "But I do love ya, more than anythin' in this fucked up world...Carol Dixon."
"Not the most traditional vows I ever heard...but for god's sake man, kiss her!" Rick told him excitedly as he swiped at the tears falling over his face. He gasped out when Michonne clutched his hand, she too overcome by the simple act of love that she had just witnessed.
Daryl tugged his new wife towards him, clasping hold of her so tightly that there was no space left between them. They surged together, lips meeting to seal their love, knowing that they didn't need some fancy ceremony to be husband and wife. When they pulled apart, Daryl buried his face into her shoulder, kissing her skin as he pulled her close.
"So, are you two going to make it official?" Rick asked, his voice breaking a little as he spoke. "A proper wedding? Guest's, party and all that stuff?"
The couple slowly untangled themselves from each other's grasp but stayed together, hands linked. Daryl looked down at the woman by his side, watching her as she smiled up at him with tear filled eyes.
"Do ya want all that stuff?" he asked her softly. "We can...if ya wanna…"
Carol lifted her hand up to cradle his face and offered him a watery smile. "I don't need a wedding, or a party, or anything else that goes with it to know we're married...maybe when we visit Alexandria we can ask Gabriel to bless our marriage, but I don't need it...this, what we just did...in the presence of the two witnesses we would have chosen for our wedding anyway...that's more, us…and I don't want to take anything away from Maggie. She's just had a baby, and everyone should be focusing on her, not us..."
"Okay then, but you're going to be the one to tell her she missed the big event!" Michonne moved away from Rick's side to pour the remainder of the wine from dinner into the four glasses before she handed them to everyone in turn. Reaching to pick hers up, she held it in the air and looked at the newlyweds with a beaming smile. "I've been to a few weddings in my time before the turn, and I can't say that any of them can compare to what we just witnessed...so...to the happy couple…"
"The happy couple," Rick grinned, raising his glass in a toast before a thought suddenly struck him. Narrowing his eyes, he focused on Daryl who was watching him in confusion. "Did you do this so I couldn't throw you a bachelor party?"
"What?" Daryl scoffed, shaking his head as he grinned widely. "Nah…"
"Because you know, I can still do it…"
Carol chuckled as she wound her arm around Daryl's waist, tugging him in closer. She had been married before, albeit unhappily, but he hadn't...maybe a party was what he needed…
"Maybe when we come back from the kingdom," she pondered, her gaze shifting to the man beside her. "We'll invite our family and celebrate with them...just so they can be a part of this too...maybe we can ask Gabriel to do the blessing then...what do you think?"
"Alright," Daryl nodded, his lips turning upwards into a smile. "Whatever ya want…"
"It's a date," Rick grinned gleefully as he reached out for Michonne, pulling her into his arms. "Congratulations!"
000
Two weeks later, Carol was coming to the end of her first week at the kingdom. On their fifth day there, Daryl had volunteered to go out on a run with several kingdom residents, but when they returned, they had a group of survivors with them. Carol had been assisting the doctor with minor surgeries for most of her time there, but when the infirmary doors burst open to reveal her husband carrying a tiny little girl in his arms, everything from that moment changed. There were three new patients for them to deal with, two of them being an elderly couple who had minor injuries and were severely malnourished. The baby was no more than a few months old. She was filthy, her tiny body caked in mud and abrasions and so dehydrated that the doctor was sceptical for her chances of recovery...but now, after two days of Carol's constant care, the little girl had started to respond to her.
Carol smiled down at the little girl who rewarded her with a bright smile. Reaching into the cot, she smoothed her fingers through the little girl's hair and felt her heart clench inside her chest. She had the brightest blue eyes she'd ever seen and her now clean hair had curled into little auburn ringlets that dropped around her little face.
"Her name's Olivia."
Carol startled at the voice behind her and tore her eyes away from the child to regard the elderly man who had arrived with her, her eyes focussing on his face. He had been in and out out of consciousness for the last two days, never staying awake long enough to answer any questions...but as Carol looked upon him now, he seemed more lucid. She glanced back into the cot again and stroked a finger across the child's cheek before she pulled her hand away. Stepping towards him, she helped him to sit up in his bed, steadying him as he tried to reach for her.
"Easy...take it slow. You're safe now, and so is the woman who came in with you. Is she your wife?" She kept her voice soft as she spoke, watching him carefully as he settled against the pillows.
"Marion…" he started. "Is she...?"
"She's right there," Carol soothed, patting his hand gently as she indicated the prone woman in the bed a few feet away from his. "She was much the same as you when she came in. She's going to be okay, she's woken up a few times and asked for Ron...is that you?"
When he nodded, his eyes clouding over as he stared at his wife's unconscious form. Carol tried to distract him, clasping his hand as she spoke. "Is the little girl your grand daughter?"
For a moment he didn't answer, his gaze fixed on his wife. Shaking his head, he sighed sadly as he turned to look at her, his eyes swimming with tears. "Marion and me...we couldn't have kids of our own, but that little girls mother begged us to take her in when she got bit...that was a month back now…"
"What happened?" Carol asked him softly as she held a cup of water to his lips, watching intently as he took a few small sip before she placed the cup back onto the table beside the bed.
"There was a group of men, four of them...they had guns and the bastards took everything we had...I didn't like the way they looked at Mari or the baby, so when they all passed out drunk we took the baby and ran…" he shook his head as if he was trying to purge the memories from his mind. "When we met the group that brought us here. I thought they were just like the others...the guy in the leather jacket came towards us and I thought…"
"That's my husband, Daryl," Carol told him with a soft smile and she gently clasped his hand in hers. "He can look a little intimidating at first."
"Your husband?" he asked, shaking his head incredulously. "Well I'll be, I was beginning to think that good folks didn't exist anymore…"
"I think we've all felt that way since the turn," she told him with a smile. "But, Daryl...he's one of the good ones…"
"I'd really like you to thank him for me...without him…"
"You can tell him yourself when he comes by later," she laughed. "But it's nice to meet you. I'm Carol."
"Good to meet you, Carol...I'm Ronnie," he nodded as he looked towards the woman in the other bed. "That's my wife Mari…Is she..."
"She's going to be okay," Carol told him reassuringly. "When the doctor comes back, he can tell you everything okay? And maybe when you're strong enough you could sit in a chair by her bed and talk to her."
"Yes...yes I'd like that. Thank you Carol."
Carol squeezed his hand in reassurance before she released him and moved over to the little girl who had kept her in the infirmary long after her shift had come to an end. When she peered into the cot, she smiled down at the baby girl who was watching her with wide, curious eyes.
"Well hello Olivia," she beamed, keeping her voice soft as she spoke. "It's good to see you're looking better, sweetheart."
"How old is she?" Carol asked Ronnie as she glanced at him briefly before she smiled down at the little girl who was transfixed on the teddy bear that Daryl had put into the cot with her.
"Her momma said she was just four months when she left her with us, and we've had her probably just over a month…" he eyed Carol thoughtfully, noting how softly she spoke to the little girl. "You know, she needs a new momma… we did the best we could, but we're not getting any younger…"
Carol swallowed hard when his words washed over her. There were other women out there who were far more worthy...women who could keep her safe...shower her with love and stability. She knew what the older man was implying, but she shut down those thoughts before they could begin to simmer...this baby could do so much better than her.
The door to the infirmary suddenly swung open, the loud creak interrupting her thought. She tore her gaze away from the infant to see Daryl's eyes fixed on her. One of the other nurses followed, holding onto a bottle of formula in one hand and a bundle of clothes clutched against her chest with the other. Making his way towards his wife, Daryl nodded towards the old man who was grinning at him as he approached.
"Thank you...for saving us son," Ronnie nodded, his voice breaking a little when he held out a shaky hand to grasp hold of Daryl's fingers. "Thank you."
"Weren't nothin'," Daryl nodded, smiling despite his embarrassment. "Glad we saw ya when we did...ya'll look a lot better than when we found ya."
"I am, thanks to your lady there. I'm grateful to both of you, more for Olivia's sake than ours," Ronnie nodded. "You just about saved that little girl's life."
Daryl nodded and swallowed the lump in his throat as he moved towards Carol and smoothed a hand over her waist.
"Hey," he whispered as he pressed a kiss into her hair. "How's she doin'?"
Carol leaned into his side and smiled down at the baby who was batting at the teddy bear, babbling excitedly as she kicked her little legs. "She's not spitting up her milk anymore."
"Yeah?" Daryl grinned, suddenly feeling a warm sense of pride. "She reminds me of little Asskicker."
"You would think that," Carol chuckled softly. "To men, all babies look exactly the same!"
"Nah," Daryl smiled as he reached into the cot to gently rub her little toes between his fingers. "She's...different…"
"Yeah?" she asked in surprise when she turned her head to focus on his face. He was watching this little baby like a protective guardian and she suddenly felt her heart clench inside her. "Daryl?"
"Ya need to sleep…" he withdrew his hand and stepped back a little as if he was trying to distance himself from the baby and turned to her, his voice softer now. "Yer've been here for over twelve hours."
"I will," Carol told him softly when she leaned into his side. "Just as soon as she's settled."
Ronnie watched the couple closely as they stood together, both of them standing side by side as they stood watch over the child gurgling up at them, looking every bit the worried parents.
"Do you have children?" Ronnie's voice sounded behind them and Daryl could feel Carol's body stiffen beside him.
"Had three girls," Daryl croaked out, glancing at the older man as his arm tightened around Carol's waist. "But they're gone now."
"I'm sorry," Ronnie sighed sadly as he laid back against the pillows, wanting to say something more comforting, but no words seemed to be enough. So instead he watched the couple silently as Carol took the formula from the nurse and handed it to her husband before she reached down to pick Olivia up to cradle her in her arms.
"Do you want to help me feed her?" Carol asked him softly, her hopeful smile growing brighter when he gave her a quick nod of the head.
Daryl watched his wife as she rocked the little girl in her arms, her lips brushing against her hair. She smiled up at him when she took the bottle from his hands and watched in delight when Olivia made a grab for it and began to drink greedily as soon as the teat touched her mouth.
"Hey...Is that good...huh sweetheart?" Daryl cooed softly at the little girl who was nestled in Carol's arms. He leaned over, propping his head on his wife's shoulder as they both peered down into the girl's blue eyes. Olivia tried to grab for him, her tiny fist opening and closing when he grinned down at her.
"She's almost six months old," Carol told him in a whisper as she leaned against his chest. "Can you even remember Judith being this small?"
"Seems a long time ago," he sighed as he kissed her shoulder. "What happened to her family?"
"Her mother got bit...Ronnie and his wife have been taking care of her…but they're both unwell themselves..."
"So, you're lookin' for a new family are ya sweetheart?" Daryl asked softly as he peered down at Olivia, his voice more gentler than Carol had ever heard him. When the baby pushed the bottle out of her mouth and smiled up at him, he couldn't help his soft chuckle when she grinned up at him, before she sucked the teat back into her mouth and began drinking again.
Behind them, a soft mumbling broke into the tranquility of the room when the old woman in the other bed groaned in confusion, her eyes blinking open as she cried out... and before he could protest, Carol turned around and handed Olivia to him, before she rushed to Marion's side.
Daryl smiled down at the baby in his arms when she popped the teat out of her mouth once more and gurgled up at him with a milky smile. There was something about her that tugged at his heart, and when he moved across to a nearby chair to sit down with her, he placed the bottle on the floor and sat her up a little to pat her back. His eyes gazed over her when she tried to sit up on her own, pushing her little body back so she could look around the room. He rubbed her back, remembering how Carol had done the same for Judith when she was small, and then she suddenly gave the loudest belch he'd ever heard. Her eyes grew wide when she looked up at him, her giggling babbles hitting him straight in the heart.
Daryl bounced her gently on his knee before he lifted her against his shoulder and nuzzled her ear, already feeling so protective over her. She babbled happily when he pulled her back, holding her upright so her feet were resting his knees, grinning at her delighted squeals. "Ya gotta stop smilin' at me like that sweetheart, cuz ya know I ain't gonna wanna leave ya when we have to go home..."
Carol returned to his side a few minutes later and squeezed his shoulder as he blew raspberries against the baby's neck. The little girl was squirming against him, her squeals filling the room as she kicked her legs excitedly. Carol shook her head, smiling incredulously as she watched their interaction for a few more moments before Olivia looked up at her and flapped her arms in delight. Carol held out her hands for the giggling infant as Daryl passed her across, flying her like an airplane in a flurry of excited giggling. Carol's smile grew even wider when she lifted Olivia into her arms, her little body bouncing against her before she snuggled against her chest, her tiny fists rubbing at her eyes.
"Are you sleepy, honey? Did Daryl wear you out?" Carol cooed softly, kissing Olivia's hair as she rocked her from side to side. She began humming softly when the little girl's eyes began to close, and she ran a fingertip across her temple.
Daryl's ran his fingers over Olivia's hair and bent to kiss her forehead before Carol moved towards the cot, lowering her onto the soft mattress. She hovered over the side for a few more moments, keeping a watchful gaze until Olivia settled. Reaching in, she pulled the pink blanket up to cover the little girl, tucking it around her tiny body protectively before she laid her hand over Olivia's chest, and felt her resolve begin to snap. She pulled her hand away sharply, she couldn't allow herself to fall in love with this child...no, she had to keep those thoughts away...
"C'mon," Daryl whispered, his hand coming up to rest on the small of her back when he saw how much she was struggling. "Ya need to rest...we'll come and see her in the mornin'."
Carol nodded, reluctantly moving away from the sleeping child. She looked towards Ronnie who was smiling deliriously at his wife who was finally asleep again.
"Goodnight, Ronnie."
The older man turned towards them, smiling brightly at her and Daryl, bidding them a whispered goodnight before he continued his silent vigil on the woman who slept peacefully in the next bed. Daryl squeezed her shoulder, his soft tug maneuvering her towards the door so they could return to their room.
000
"What are you thinking?" Carol asked him softly when they laid together in the darkness of their room.
"Hmmm…" Daryl sighed as his fingertips traced soft circles over her naked back. "Thinkin' 'bout that baby…"
Carol sighed against his chest and nuzzled her lips against his bare skin. She knew what was going through his mind because she had felt it too...that little tug at her heart when the possibilities flashed through her, blooming into a beautiful dream…
"She's going to make a family very happy," she whispered softly, already feeling the deep sense of loss settling over her. "I can't imagine anyone not wanting her."
He was silent for a long moment before he spoke again, his arm tugging her a little tighter against him. "Was thinkin'..."
"Yeah?" her heart leapt a little in her chest and she held her breath as she waited for him to speak...knowing already what he was going to say...and she wasn't sure what she was more afraid of...the possibility of becoming a mother again or the fear of being unable to keep the child safe...
"Maybe, y'know, we could take her…" he started cautiously. "If ya wanna…"
His words caused her heart to ache and she knew he was waiting for her to agree without a seconds thought, but she had been thinking of nothing else since she'd laid eyes on that little girl. Lifting herself up on one elbow, she laid a hand over his cheek, turning his face towards her. She could see how much he wanted this, but she was so scared of failing another child, another little girl that she let down because she wasn't strong enough to save her. Moving her hand from his face, she sat upright in the bed and pulled her knees up and under her chin.
"What if I can't keep her safe?" she asked him, her voice desperate as she spoke into her knees. "Every little girl I've loved is gone...I failed Sophia...I failed Mika and Lizzie...I couldn't even save Sam...and I...what if she…"
"Hey," he whispered as he pulled his body up to sit beside her and smoothed his hand across her back. "You loved those girls...all three of 'em were better cuz a you...and Sophia wasn't on you neither. She was scared and she ran...that ain't on you sweetheart, it ain't...and Lizzie, she was sick, there weren't nothin' ya coulda done about her bein' that way. This world did that to her, not you...you didn't kill Mika and ya didn't fail Sam either...it was just this fucked up world that killed those kids...not you...you ain't bad, Carol...nothin' about ya is bad…"
"But I…" Carol tried to speak through the lump in her throat but she couldn't seem to get the words out. She swiped at the lone tear that escaped to roll over her cheek before she turned to face him, aching for him to heal her. "What if I lose her too? I can't lose another one Daryl...I just can't…"
"Hey, we ain't gonna lose that baby," he told her adamantly as he pulled her tighter against him when he lowered them both back down onto the bed. "You ain't alone no more…you an' me, we're a family whether we take her or not...but...all I'm askin' is that ya think about it...that's all..."
They laid together in silence for a long moment, neither of them speaking for fear of upsetting the other. Carol wanted desperately to believe that she could love Olivia, but what if the cost of that love was only going to destroy her in the end? Spreading her fingers wide, she smoothed her hand over his chest, coming to a stop over his heart.
"If we did take her...then we couldn't just…" she shook her head, this was coming out all wrong. Taking a breath, she traced a fingertip over his chest before she captured his gaze in the silvery darkness. "Babies can be messy and demanding...if we take her then we can't just have sex anywhere and anytime...not like we do now...we'll both be tired and she'll have to come first...there will be times when we'll both be so exhausted that we won't have time together, with just the two of us...are you ready for that?"
Daryl clasped at her fingers and brought her hand to his lips, placing a soft kiss into the centre of his palm. "Are you?"
"Honestly?" she sighed, swallowing the ball of emotion in her throat as she lowered her head back onto his chest. "I'm terrified...and I don't know...I love what we have now...but that baby...she's so…"
"I know…"
"But...if we could...take her I mean...would...you want to?" Carol's voice came out in a whisper as she waited for him to answer, unsure whether she wanted him to say yes...but when he turned in her arms and closed his mouth over hers, she knew she had his answer...
TBC in the final chapter