12. Insanity

A/N: I am REALLY sorry for not updating! Get ready for my long list of excuses: One, I'm training for a 5-K in June so I've been running after school every day. Two: I have two Piano recitals in May and I haven't memorized any of my songs and a viola concert in May. Three: I am currently reading 12 books, 6 of them over 300 pages and the other 6 pretty close. Four: I am currently writing ANOTHER story, for PerseusSlayerOfMedusa's challenge. Anyway, I hope this is better :)

Oh yeah, and please check out my 1st chapter. I have a new and better version up. Thanks!

This is dedicated to ireadeverythang64 because they gave me the idea. I thank every one of my amazing reviewers!

Disclaimer: I didn't own PJO the last time I uploaded, why would you think I own it now?

Leo's POV:

Screams and the sound of fear pierced the air and into my little eight year old world. The fire was growing threateningly as smoke curled itself around my body and invaded my nostrils. I was not afraid, but I still shook. I tried to scream, but I felt like I was in one of those dreams where you have no voice. So I watched instead as the sight of my mother dying left an ugly black stain on my heart.

And then I did something I rarely did, even as an eight year old— I sat down and cried. I cried a thousand tears for every moment we'd never get to have together. With every beat of my heart, another wave of guilt and sadness was pumped through my veins. Before I could stop it, the flames started to increase. And within seconds my whole life had gone up in flames.

I knew I couldn't stay there. The air was still heavy with the memory of my mother. So I wiped my dirt-streaked face clean of tears and started to run. I didn't know where I was going or how I'd get there. All I could register was the one-two sound of my feet slapping the road and the scent of smoke that lingered on my clothes.

A few hours passed before I reached the nearest house. My mother and I had lived pretty far away from everyone else in town, so no one even knew about the fire yet. No one knew my life was over.

I can still remember the feeling of guilt I had to carry—I still carry it today. It felt similar to a 2T brick resting on my chest. My fragile body nearly collapsed from the pressure of it all. It was my fault, and I knew it.

My blackened feet carried up three steps and I fell down against the door. It opened to reveal a beautiful woman, maybe 25. I couldn't really tell much about her since my vision was fading, but I still remember one thing.

The woman had said, "It's gonna be okay, baby." I wanted to believe her so badly.

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I later learned the woman's name was Lilly. It suited her, she was a beauty. She took me in for a while and tried to call my relatives, but none would take me in. I couldn't help but wonder why. Did they know what I did? Did they know I killed mom?

Every day I had to her was a symphony—strong and unlike any other. But after only six months, Lilly said I had to leave. She told me I didn't do anything wrong, it was just that I needed a more permanent home. I was sad to leave, Angie had been a great mom… but she was never as good as my mama.

On the day I left I cried a lot. I did that more often now, like ever since my mom died a piece of me went up in flames with her. It just didn't seem fair. That day the sun was shining too bright and the taste of flowers in the wind was too sweet. It was sickly perfect. But I had to leave, so I did. Angie kissed my forehead and told me to call if I ever needed anything. I had no intention of calling.

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The next 6 years were more or less the same. I'd go to a new foster home, receive the same useless sympathy, cause problems, and run away. Again and again and again; I had the routine down like brushing my teeth in the morning. Trouble seemed to follow me like a faithful dog—never leaving and always too close.

But eventually I was sent to this Wilderness school, and I met a very pretty girl. Her name was Piper; Piper McLean. Piper sort of took me under her wing, making sure I didn't run away again. I was grateful for that. I hadn't had someone who actually cared about me since Angie, and that was over 6 years ago.

Then Jason came, and we learned we were demigods. That was….. A bit unexpected. I mean, how would you handle it if a depressed blond teen told you were the son of some supposedly fake Greek god? Yeah… that's what I thought, totally insane. I still felt bad for Annabeth, and at first I thought she hated me, but Chiron told me it was because I reminded her of Percy. It wasn't fair Percy had to disappear. I could tell how much she needed him, even if she wouldn't admit it. Annabeth was probably the only one whose life was worse than mine.

Then we went on that quest, and some old memories started to float back to the surface. Gaea….. She was the one who provoked me to start that fire. She was the one who ruined my life, not me. And that's why I had to defeat her.

Okay, I'll admit I was a little jealous of Jason and Piper at first. Their lives seemed so….. Perfect. Piper, so beautiful was with Jason, the born hero. Together they were unstoppable. They didn't really need me, Leo, the annoying 3rd wheel. I had these weird fire-powers. I was useless. I was going to hurt them if I stayed…

But Jason and Piper didn't seem to want to let me go. They insisted they cared, that I was more than a third wheel. I wanted to believe it so bad, and eventually, I found I did. So we continued on our quest and eventually saved Hera, becoming the hero's and returning to camp like one. I was starting to understand that maybe my power over fire was more than a curse. Maybe, just maybe, it was a kind of ugly gift; bittersweet, like lemonade.

When we got back, I found Bunker 9 and I was proud of myself. Finally, I was starting to be something useful. Jason was slowly regaining his memories and Annabeth was slowly breaking down. People tried to stay away from the two altogether; they were just so moody and unpredictable. We couldn't blame them, though. Jason was going through something none of us had experience in. Annabeth's boyfriend probably didn't even remember her, if he was even alive or not being tortured by the Romans. Jason always said they wouldn't do that, but I could see a small flicker of doubt in his eyes.

The Argo II was slowly but surely coming along. There were a few mishaps, but eventually we got it together. Sailing it was the hard part. Jason and I took turns and Annabeth promised Percy would be able to help on the sea.

The day we landed everyone was a nervous wreck. I tried to stay calm by cracking jokes, but they only seemed to irritate everyone more. Annabeth didn't talk to anyone but Thalia, and that was only when it was crucial information. We were worried what would happen if Percy didn't remember. I had a feeling I'd like this Percy guy. He seemed fun and easy-going, like me.

When we did land, they guy I assumed was Percy ran up first. He started at Annabeth for a while before he sprinted to her and hugged her like there was no tomorrow. When they pulled apart she kissed him like nobody was watching, and to them I bet there wasn't.

Jason, on the other hand, was having some girl problems of his own. He just couldn't seem to decide between Reyna and Jason. I told him to go with Piper because I sort of like this Reyna girl myself. She was tall, beautiful, mature, and totally out of my league—my kind of girl. Reyna didn't seem to be too fond of me, though. Once she tried to burn me. That turned out so well.

There is this one other girl, Hazel. She looks at me like I'm her long lost brother. I don't know why, but her name sound familiar, like I heard it in another life. Frank, her boyfriend, didn't quite like all the attention she was giving me, either. (It's not like I minded, though.)

Everything was starting to become too much. When the stars and the suns were asleep, my past came back to haunt me through the shadows. Then I had the whole Gaea problem. People expected me to be some hero, but I wasn't. On top of that, Hazel was really starting to creep me out now. She started stalking me, almost and it looked like everyone knew why but no one would spill.

Let's just say my life was totally insane. I just don't know if was good or bad yet.