Don't say anything! I KNOW it's been almost two months since I've updated on this, but I really want to work on my other fic, "The Growing Up Of Tigerstar".
I have more than 230 reviews on it, so that makes it my most popular one, and that makes me update it more.
So that means updates on this fic, and my other, "I Am A Prisoner Of Tigerstar" will be slower.
BUT I WILL STILL UPDATE!
For those people who waited so long, here's a Spark plushie and some candy corn.
I don't own Thriller or Michael Jackson. OR Warriors.
*
"ORDER IN THE COURT!"
The Angry She-Cat Club was jolted awake by Sandstorm's yell.
"What—the—bleeping—StarClan?" Spark yawned and hit Icepaw on the head for no reason whatsoever.
Stealthclaw was still asleep, and as every cat stared at her, she muttered, "Mice are nice and made of ice and dipped in sugar and spice…I love you, Firestar…"
Poppyfrost and Frostclaw exchanged evil grins and threw Stealthclaw in a river.
"ORDER IN THE ANGRY SHE-CAT CLUB!" Sandstorm screeched again.
This time everyone was awake.
"SHADDAP!" Sedgepaw yelled.
Silverdew looked around wildly. "Who said that?!"
"Me," Sedgepaw meowed.
"AHH!" Silverdew screamed. "IT THE VOICES!"
"Anyway," Sandstorm cleared her throat, "it is time to discuss the attack."
Amberthorn raised her paw. "Weren't we going to attack the toms and the she-cats defending the toms?"
Ashfoot and Heathertail nodded agreement.
"Yes," Sandstorm continued, "but we need an exact plan. And NO SHORT-SHEETING THE TOMS' NESTS!" she snapped in Willowshine and Minnowpaw's direction.
"Could we pelt them with stiff rabbits?" Mousefur asked.
"I LIKE PIE!" Stealthclaw yowled from the river.
Leopardstar whacked Stealthclaw on the head with a stiff rabbit.
Squirrelflight sighed and glared at Brightheart. Brightheart jumped and glared back.
"WE HAS ANNOUNCEMENT!"
The Angry She-Cat Club members turned around and saw Rowanclaw holding paws with Frostfeather.
"We is mates now," they meowed. "And we is so happy."
"NOOOOOOO!" Tawnypelt cried.
Tornsight giggled.
"YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY?" Tawnypelt screamed at her.
"Duh."
"DIE!" Tawnypelt launched herself at Tornsight and they began to tear each other into bits.
"Right…" Sandstorm shook her head disbelievingly.
Mistyfoot muttered, "Idiots."
"ON WITH THE ATTACK!" Sandstorm screamed.
"YEAH!"
The she-cats picked up each and every kind of weapon they could find, and marched through the forest, all the way to a gathering of toms and defender she-cats.
Wow, what a coincidence.
Firestar jumped up and screamed like a little girl.
Sandstorm grinned. "ATTACK!"
All the Angry She-Cats yelled and charged into battle. Sandstorm picked up a bag of bricks and threw them at Firestar, laughing maniacally when it broke apart and the bricks hit Firestar, Onestar, and Blackstar together.
Sedgepaw gathered the Junior Members and together they grabbed Onestar and tied him to the top of the Sky Oak.
A huge stage magically appeared with an enormous stereo on it. Heathertail and Frostfeather jumped on it and pressed PLAY. "Thriller" began to boom all around the lake.
It's close to midnight and something evil's lurking in the dark
Under the moonlight you see something that almost stops your heart
Squirrelflight laughed maniacally as she and Spark chased Brambleclaw and Dustpelt through the forest. Spark shot down Dustpelt.
You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes
"HELLLP!" Brambleclaw screamed before Squirrelflight and Spark shot him with a tranquilizer.
You're paralyzed
'Cause this is thriller, thriller night
"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" Crowfeather cried.
"Don't worry, sweetie!" Leafpool assured him. "I'll protect you!"
"No, I'LL protect you!" Nightcloud countered.
Leafpool hissed. "You wanna tussle?"
"YEAH!" Leafpool and Nightcloud became a whirling whirlwind of fur and claws, and Crowfeather was left unprotected. He gulped.
And no one's gonna save you from the beast about to strike
You know it's a thriller, thriller night
Crowfeather screamed as a monster truck driven by Silverfeather and Frostclaw ran him over.
You're fighting for your life inside a thriller, killer night
Tornsight snuck through the trees dressed in cameo, a hunting rifle slung over her shoulder. She was hunting Blackstar—who miraculously survived the bricks.
You hear the door slam and realize there's nowhere left to run
You feel the cold hand and wonder if you'll ever see the sun
"FOR LOVE!" Tornsight shot the unsuspecting Blackstar five times.
"HA, YOU FOOL!" She danced on his body. "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DUMP TORNSIGHT!"
You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination, girl!
But all the while you hear the creature creeping up behind
You're out of time
Stealthclaw and Jayfeather gave each other a nod and sprang out of the bushes at Lionblaze. "REVENGE IS MINE!" Jayfeather screeched.
"Ow—ow—ow—ow—ow—ow," Lionblaze yelled as Jayfeather and Stealthclaw repeatedly hit him on the head with Mr. Sticky.
Back on the stage, members of The Angry She-Cat Club were dancing on stage, and Dapplesong was off to the side helping Squirrelflight beat Brambleclaw up.
"GO MICHEAL JACKSON!" Icepaw and Sorreltail screeched. They started break dancing, and Leopardstar—after, of course, killing Onestar—began crowd-surfing.
'Cause this is thriller, thriller night
There ain't no second chance against the thing with forty eyes, girl
"I never meant to insult you, dear!" Firestar cried as Sandstorm tied him to a tree and painted a target on him.
Sandstorm ignored him and called out to the line of waiting she-cats: "Five mice to throw a knife at the famous Firestar!"
"Ooh, let me!" Dapplesong handed twenty mice to Sandstorm and Sandstorm gave her four knives.
Thriller, thriller night
You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight
Firestar said his last prayer to StarClan as Dapplesong aimed at the big red dot painted on Firestar's chest.
"One…two…THREE!" Dapplesong threw the first knife, which hit the tree trunk.
Firestar breathed a sigh of relief.
"I STILL HAVE THREE MORE!" Dapplesong screamed.
"DappleSONG! DappleSONG!" Featherpaw and Mistyfoot chanted.
Night creatures calling, the dead start to walk in their masquerade
There's no escaping the jaws of the alien this time
Dapplesong threw two more knives and missed.
"I will get you, Firestar!" she screeched as she prepared to throw the last knife.
They're open wide
The fourth knife flew through the air and hit Firestar squarely in the heart.
This is the end of your life
"YES!" Dapplesong yelled. "I have killed the great Firestar! Bow down to me!" She grabbed Brackenfur—who had just joined The Angry She-Cats Club for no apparent reason—and disappeared.
They're out to get you, there's demons closing in on every side
They will possess you, until you change that number on your dial
Breezepelt gulped as Frostclaw, Silverdew, Moonlight, and Russetfur surrounded him.
"DIE!" Silverdew screeched. The four she-cats attacked poor Breezepelt until he lay bleeding in the dirt.
Now is the time for you and I to cuddle close together, yeah
All through the night I'll save you from the terror on the screen
I'll make you see
Ashfoot and Mousefur crept up on Webfoot and Longtail.
"One the count of three," Mousefur whispered. "One…two..three!" They jumped out—armed with spears—and attacked the poor elder toms.
That this is thriller, thriller night
'Cause I can thrill you more than any ghost would ever dare try
Heathertail and Willowshine turned the volume up and brought out giant speakers.
THRILLER, THRILLER NIGHT
SO LET ME HOLD YOU TIGHT AND SHARE A
KILLER, DILLER, CHILLER, THRILLER HERE TONIGHT
Foxpaw tiptoed through the trees, with Flamepaw, Tigerpaw, and Pebblepaw following close behind. "I think I found a place to hide," he whispered, leading them into an abandoned fox den.
"SURPRISE!" Minnowpaw screamed, as she, Sedgepaw, and Dawnpaw sprang out and mauled the tom apprentices.
'CAUSE THIS IS THRILLER, THRILLER NIGHT
GIRL, I CAN THRILL YOU MORE THAN ANY GHOST WOULD EVER DARE TRY
Sandstorm gathered five mice from Amberthorn, who was given a knife to throw into Firestar's body.
Amberthorn screamed, "TAKE THAT, KITTYPET!" as the knife hit—and stuck in—his eye. Sandstorm and other waiting she-cats applauded as Firestar's eye squirted eye juice.
Ew.
THRILLER, THRILLER NIGHT
SO, LET ME HOLD YOU TIGHT AND SHARE A KILLER, THRILLER NIGHT
Leopardstar gathered up a group of the Angry She-Cats.
"We are nearing victory!" she announced.
"Victory, yah, yah," Rowanclaw—when did it show up?—meowed. It and Frostfeather began making out.
Tawnypelt growled and shot it with Tornsight's hunting rifle.
DARKNESS FALLS ACROSS THE LAND
THE MIDNIGHT HOUR IS CLOSE AT HAND
"Soon," Leopardstar hissed, punching the air, "she-cats will rule the Clans!"
"Go she-cats, go, go, go she-cats," Rowanclaw meowed.
CREATURES CRAWL IN SEACRH OF BLOOD
TO TERRORIZE Y'ALLS NEIGHBORHOOD
Stealthclaw and Silverdew chased Voletooth through RiverClan territory. Voletooth cried with exhaustion, then collapsed.
"Take THAT, cowardly vermin!" Stealthclaw hissed as she and Silverdew tore his head off.
THE FOULEST STENCH IS IN THE AIR
THE FUNK OF FOURTY THOUSAND YEARS
Heathertail and Willowshine kept dancing.
AND GRIZZLY GHOULS FROM EVERY TOMB
ARE CLOSING IN TO SEAL YOUR DOOM
Bleeding, and on his last life, Onestar—who Leopardstar gaped at seeing alive—dragged himself over to Sandstorm, Spark, Leopardstar, and all the other Angry She-Cats.
"The toms and defender she-cats surrender!" he gasped out. "We have lost more than half of our cats!"
Spark—who had caused the deaths of many of those more than half cats, evilly grinned and patted her giant machine gun.
"We did it, Dolores," she said fondly.
Back on the stage, Heathertail and Willowshine had collapsed from dancing exhaustion.
The last tunes of "Thriller" were playing.
AND THOUGH YOU FIGHT TO STAY ALIVE
YOUR BODY STARTS TO SHIVER
FOR NO MERE MORTAL CAN RESIST
THE EVIL OF THE THRILLER............
Spark led the way to a nearby bar to buy the victorious she-cats drinks—nothing alcoholic for the Junior Members, of course.
Hours later, most of the club members were drunk and snoring in their chairs. Spark, meanwhile, had gone back to the lake and revived all the dead toms and she-cats.
There was one thing she couldn't resist though. As Firestar was revived from the RBT, Spark tied him to a tree, painted a target on his chest, and gathered up some knives.
"Take that! And that!"
"OW!"
"THIS IS SO FUN!"
"OH MY STARCLAN, DON'T THROW IT THERE!"
And thus the Clans were restored to normal, until the next episode of The Random Factor.
*
So, was it okay? Special thanks goes to brackenfurlover for helping me with the song decision.
And I WILL update faster next time! Thanks for waiting.
Ciao—
LenzieKat