Chapter 12: One Step Forward

[2 months later]

Emma hesitated as she stood in the doorway of Dr. Mitchell's office. She was back in the clothes that she had arrived in eleven months ago. Emma knocked softly and Dr. Mitchell looked up from some paperwork where she sat at her desk.

"Emma," Dr. Mitchell said in surprise.

Emma walked in and Dr. Mitchell walked over meeting her halfway.

"I just wanted to say thanks for…" Emma looked down not being able to bring herself to say the words.

Dr. Mitchell nodded, "You're welcome. So you're being released today."

Emma looked up, "Yeah. It's gonna be weird, back in the real world or whatever."

"You'll get through it."

This time Emma nodded, "I know. I've survived on my own for most of my life."

"So do you know where you're going to go?"

Emma shifted and looked away slightly uncomfortable, "Yeah," was the only one word answer she stated.

"Your ex," Dr. Mitchell said.

Emma's eyes shifted up sharply.

"You haven't talked much about him aside from a few things."

Emma shook her head, "I know it's stupid but I have to find out. Maybe if I could just talk to him-. I don't know. Like I said it's stupid."

"No it's not stupid but do you think you're ready for that conversation?"

"It doesn't really matter. I just think if I can get it then I can move on."

"And if you can't get that closure?"

"I don't know."

"Emma, don't hold onto something that may not be there anymore. You get a fresh start now. Don't let your past hold you back."

Emma gave a sad smile, "The past is all I have. I don't even know half of it. I've been looking for my parents for as long as I could remember but now I have to look for him too."

Dr. Mitchell nodded knowing Emma's mind was made up. "Just be careful and good luck out there Emma. You'll be okay."

"Thanks," Emma said making her way to the door.

Making her way to the lobby Emma stopped at the counter where Loretta was waiting. There wasn't much to Emma's effects. Loretta slid the car key and keychain to Emma. She hesitated for a moment before taking it.

"Any idea where I can find the car," Emma asked.

"There's an impound lot a quarter mile down the road. Usually inmate vehicles are placed there. I can get a car to drive you."

"Why, because I just had a baby two months ago," Emma said sarcastically. In the past two months Emma had become indifferent to what she had experienced. It was easier that way than allowing herself to think about the child she had given up.

"No," said Emma, "I can walk."

"Alright suit yourself. Good luck Miss Swan."

"Yeah," Emma replied as she made her way to the exit.

Outside she stood for a moment as she let the blazing sun touch her. She had been out during her sentence but this time was different. It actually felt good because for the first time in eleven months she was free.

The walk ended up doing Emma some good. It was nice to stretch her legs elsewhere other than just at the compound.

When she arrived Emma knocked on the window of the only vertical cubical that stood in front of a long fenced gate.

"Can I help you," a round stubby man asked in his gruff voice.

"Yeah I'm looking for my car," said Emma.

"You got the key?"

Emma pulled the key from her pocket and handed it to him.

"Name?"

"Swan. Emma Swan."

The man looked over his list and then reached for the button which opened the gate.

"Come on back," he said.

Emma followed the man through the lot until they came upon a green tarp. The man took it off and for the first time Emma froze completely. She had not seen the car since shortly before her arrest. It had been one thing to know that the car had become hers, that she had laid eyes on the key but to see her car for the first time brought back a flood of memories, memories which she was between wanting and not.

Emma forced herself to push the thoughts back. If they kept flooding her mind in this way she may never be able to get in the car much less use it. She supposed she could sell it later on but right now she really needed the wheels.

"How much is this gonna cost me," she asked.

The man looked again at his list, "Says here it's all ready been paid for."

"By who?"

"Anonymous donor," he answered. "Just be grateful."

"Right," Emma said.

The man handed the list to Emma. "Sign here."

He then handed over the key, "Car's all yours."

"I really can't talk you out of this?" Aaron asked as Neal packed one more bag in his car.

Theresa was off to the side holding Henry.

"You've known about this for months," Neal said to him.

"Yeah and I kept thinking you'd come to your senses and would just let go."

"I can't."

"Why not, answer me that question Neal, why!"

"Because I still love her that's why," Neal answered. "I can't be part of her life physically because I can't stand in the way of her destiny but I can't abandon her either even if I'm just on the sidelines."

"And what you're just going to drag Henry along wherever Emma goes, wherever you go? What kind of life is that for him?"

"I'm doing the best I can."

"You could always do better."

Neal placed his hands in his pockets. "Look Aaron, I'm grateful for what you've done, helping me out and everything but it's best if we just go our separate ways now. You don't need a loser brother like me in your life especially one who can't ever be honest with you. You don't know who Emma is who she really is and even if you did you wouldn't believe it. You don't even know who Henry is, his ancestry."

"Yet somehow you do. You believe in whatever story you've concocted to keep yourself away."

"I have to go," Neal said not wanting to continue their conversation. Neal looked over at his sister-in-law. "Theresa, the baby."

Theresa came over with tears in her eyes. "I'm really going to miss this little guy," she said as she handed Henry to Neal.

"Are you even sure she's going to be there," Aaron asked, "at this mystery place of yours."

"She'll be there."

"But how can you be sure?"

Neal smiled, "Because I know Emma."

Neal walked around to the car where the car seat was and placed Henry in it. Neal smiled at the little one.

"Ready to go on your first road trip buddy," he said tickling Henry's stomach. "Yeah you're ready."

Neal got in the driver's side and lowered the window. "I'll see you around," he said to Aaron and Theresa.

"No you won't," Aaron replied.

Neal just nodded and began the ignition, driving away.