(Warning? Here comes one of the most difficult things I ever wrote. I hope I succeeded in keeping both the seriousness (because it is a life or death situation, right!) and the fluff (because I live for the fluff) alive despite the silliness of it all (because let's be honest the whole Pon Farr thing is quite silly). I hope too that the fragmented effects will not make it hard to follow - it felt fitting to me because of all the flashes waves Jim gets in his mind, but I want what I write to stay readable, huh… So feel free to laugh (I know I do) because it is ridicule here and there, but let me know what works and what doesn't?)

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XII. THE WEIRDEST PART IN AN ALREADY PRETTY WEIRD STORY (JIM'S POV)

"You were not about to hypo yourself when I got here."

"I was."

Jim gave Spock his best 'bullshit' gaze and Spock relented.

"But in order to ensure the hypo's chemicals would work at their maximum and lengthen as much as possible my period of sleep, I first needed to temper an expected yet new side effect of my current condition."

It took Jim two seconds to decode it all, and another two at least to react, because he wasn't sure how to react… He didn't want to embarrass them both for nothing if he was wrong, but remembering how sort of 'gone' Spock had first appeared only made the whole thing more plausible, and Jim really had to know if he was right… Oh Gosh, this was weird…

Not weird because Jim had to reconsider stuff he had taken for granted, mind you. Spock had said 'new'; and it would be in fact quite logical if Vulcans were 'late bloomers' compared to humans – they lived more than twice longer after all, right… So even though Jim (without actually giving it a thought, of course) had always just believed that Spock was indeed sexually active already (there was no way nothing ever happened in the bedroom between his First and Uhura; not with the way she glowed on some early shifts), it wasn't a difficult task to re-adapt his views according to that new parameter.

(What WAS actually shocking though was that it would mean that Uhura had allowed not only *someone* but a bloody Vulcan with a bloody eidetic memory and in full possession of his bloody mental capacities while actually unaffected by the whole bloody thing, to witness her O'condition, multiple times; and the amount of trust this implied was to Jim simply dumbfounding – and he couldn't decide if he was more kind of envious or totally petrified by the idea. Uhura's bravery had always been a given, but it still kept reaching new heights...) (*AN 1)

No. The whole thing was simply weird because it really wasn't the kind of conversation you ever expected to ever have with your co-worker, especially if Vulcan, huh…

But Jim HAD to know.

Because if Spock meant what Jim believed he meant… And if a Vulcan's first instinct when getting hard was to meditate (no wonder by the way then that they had to get actually out of their minds in order to reproduce!)… Then this whole worrying situation should finally turn out hopeful!

Jim eyed Spock's form for a hint that he had understood it all right but – damn those Vulcans robes – wasn't getting any, and finally decided he just had to risk his thoughts aloud.

"Spock, we already agreed that this conversation never happened to start with anyway, so I apologize if I'm crossing a line but I really need to know… Do you mean you were (cough) hard (cough) *there* ?"

Spock must have been expecting the question because he answered without hesitation: "Affirmative".

"OOOOkayyyyyy… And that's why you were kind of meditating?"

"Affirmative."

"And has the situation disappeared by now?"

Spock turned this time somewhat greener: "Negative".

Damn. They had been talking life or death stuff and personal stuff and probably embarrassing stuff for like ages by now, and it hadn't killed Spock's mood ? (*AN 2)

But Jim felt like giving himself a high five - he was definitely on the right track with his new idea !

"All right. Spock, please just hear me out before objecting. I think this current situation of yours could be in fact helpful. If your body has already started producing reproductive cells in order to have more than enough of them by the time your Plak Tow hits, then it means that you can start right now to control their pressure when it hits. And I think the lesser the pressure, the bigger the chance that you stay in control of yourself longer, or that your fever doesn't get too extremely high, right?"

"It doesn't sound illogical."

"Indeed." So Jim soldiered on and simply dropped his bomb. "Which is why I think you should deal with your 'problem' the human way, you know…"

Spock only seemed puzzled… so Jim tried to sound nothing but practical as he had to explain: "You should touch yourself?"

Spock actually blanched; and Jim tried to put himself in a post-Nero Vulcan's shoes while pushing his point.

"I know, it probably sounds like a waste of limited and useful cells, or just like a silly, gross thing to do, or both, but in your situation it is your best shot at limiting the consequences of your Plak Tow, and both as your Captain and as your friend I simply want you to take that opportunity - like it or not. We're talking about your life, Spock - at least about your brain, you said so - so please just take a minute to think it through before saying no. You're good at prioritizing after all, right?"

Spock didn't like the idea, it was obvious. But he had come to the only conclusion possible too apparently, because he only asked, kind of guilty : "But what if I can't?"

"You can Spock. (Anyway, he HAD to, right.) Trust me, in such a condition for so long, anyone can. Besides, you're half human. If only one Vulcan should be able to, it would be you. Just give it a go and- Look, it works differently for everybody, so I'm not gonna tell you how you should do it, but just start and see how it goes, all right? See it as a new experience you have to analyze, or think of anything but what you are doing, it doesn't matter, as long as you do it, ok? I have to call the guys anyway and have them send lots of stuff and all, so I won't be around for quite some time and it should be plenty time enough for what you have to do. Just… Do it Spock, please. Or consider it an order and blame me for it for the rest of your life, I don't care - as long as you do it."

There was a long silence. And then : "I shall try."

"And it will work." Jim felt like clapping a hand on Spock's shoulder in reassurance, but stopped himself midway, realizing now wasn't a time for physical contact. Spock must have had sensed it too and had taken an (unnecessary in the end) step backwards, which had actually pained Jim somehow nonetheless, because Spock was by now quite accustomed to his tactility (he must have noticed that Jim WAS tactile, with everyone, and that he actually really tried to refrain his instincts when communicating with him, and that Jim at least NEVER actually touched his skin (a good thing Vulcan body temperature implied long sleeves about all the time by the way).

"It will work Spock." Jim repeated instead, with all the fervor he could. And then he turned to leave.

Two steps later he turned one more time though, adding : "And if you feel like thinking of Nyota, it's all right. Believe me, she wouldn't mind. She would even be honored to help saving your life."

Then, having said all he thought he could say to help Spock about this, he quickly left. He had tons of preparations to make, right, and needed to focus on them.

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AN 1: This is to me the biggest difference between TOS Jim and AOS Jim. TOS Jim definitely knows how to use his charms and uses them time and time again - always to save the day, mind you - but he is in fact quite shy (remember the whole 'bookish weirdo who needed help from a friend to get his first girlfriend whom he actually expected to marry by the way' theme, and the fact that it took those two idiots (Jim and Spock) like 200 years to actually figure out that they did fit together…) and he always actually CARES for the few he actually falls for - be it his first girlfriend or an admirable woman from the past or a robot, for Christ's sake (or a silly Vulcan of course, but, as I just said, that comes like 200 years later). Whereas AOS Jim is like the king of the one-night stands. (Not that he uses the ones he beds - I see it more like a 'win-win' situation for both parties who simply genuinely agree to 'have fun' or whatever). Yet the two still are the same somehow, because AOS Jim IMO never lets himself fall in fact (in order not to get abandoned/hurt later on obviously because of everything from his past - and now I need a tissue because BABY!) – in his eyes it's ok to share your O'face with someone who is too far gone too to really notice it or who is sort of bound to secrecy because you know her/his O'face too anyway; but it's another to willingly let yourself be that vulnerable and to actually trust someone with such an intimate knowledge of yourself, and the idea alone terrifies him…

AN 2: Of course it hasn't, Jim, when you are RIGHT HERE and that Spock sees you and hears you and smells you and – why do you think Spock is turning THAT green, huh? Well, newsflash, it's more from guilt than from embarrassment, ok ?