I am sooo sorry this took so long to update. We got a new puppy and its like having a baby in the house. She takes my constant attention when I am at home. I hope you guys enjoy this. I know it has been a long time coming.

Beep...beep...beep...

Where am I?

Beep...beep...

What is that beeping? ...beep...

It's so bright, so so bright.

Beep...beep...beep...

My eyes...they feel so heavy.

I attempt to open my eyes. Nothing.

Beep...beep...beep...

I tried again, with a little more success. They fluttered. Bright white light escaped and hit my pupils. Ohh, I moaned without meaning to.

"Bella?" A frantic voice beside me appeared. Mom?

"Charlie, she's waking up! Get a nurse!" Definitely mom. She always worries and frets too much.

She said nurse...

Lights and beeping....?

....hospital?

Why am I in a hospital?

I tried to open my eyes again. They fluttered open and immediately I squinted to the brightness. The white walls opposite of me were blinding, along with the fluorescent light over my bed. Mom came into view.

Her eyes were red as if she had been crying. She looked so old, as if she aged dramatically since the last time I saw her. What happened to her?

"Oh, baby...," she mummered putting her head on my chest and rubbing my arms. She started to cry.

I wanted to comfort her, but it was all I could muster to open my eyes. I just laid there and let her cry.

There was a commotion at the doorway and I saw a woman in scrubs and a man in a white coat walk briskly in with my dad following behind them. My dad looked awful as well. His face was full of worry lines.

The man in the white coat came over to my left side. He began checking the monitors and looking back at me. Mom had gotten up and moved to the chair to my right. My dad stood in the back with a look I couldn't quite read. The nurse stood back as if waiting to hear orders.

"Well, Miss Bella," the man in the white coat, said turning to me and smiling down at me. "You gave us quite a scare, but your going to be okay."

I heard my mom sigh with relief and I looked over and saw my mom and dad hugging.

My mind felt so groggy and exhausted. I felt as if I had been drugged for days. What day was it?

I wanted to ask what happened and why I was here, but it came out with a groan.

"Ooo...." My mom jumped forward rushing towards me.

The doctor leaned in looking intently at me. "Miss. Swan, your body has been through a lot this last month, I need you to try to relax and rest."

Month? How long exactly had I been unconscious?

"Is she okay?" I heard my dad ask from the far corner. Like me, hospitals were un-nerving to him.

"She is fine," the doctor said turning toward them, "Like I said, she just needs rest. She will probably be more coherent after more rest". He turned back to me and smiled. My eyes began to get droopy once again. No! I wanted information! What has happened?!

"Sleep, my little Bella." I heard my mom croon to me softly, rubbing her hand through my hair.

I lost my internal battle of fighting sleep. I drifted off to blackness once again.

***********

I woke up sometime a few days later. I had lost all sense of time.

It was night. My mom was sleeping on a cot in front of my tiny window. My dad was close by in a uncomfortable looking chair, head bent, asleep.

I didn't want to wake them, but the position I was in was uncomfortable. I quietly shifted. My mom's eyes sprang open. She looked at me, eyes widening.

"Bella!" she exclaimed, jumping to her feet. My dad shot up in the same second my mom's feet hit the floor. I was surrounded by them.

"Oh, Bella, honey, " my mom fretted over me.

"Bells...,"my dad started swallowing hard, looking extremely emotional and on the verge of tears. I have never seen my dad cry before.

"Wh-what am I doing here?" I asked still confused. At least my head was clearing.

My mom looked at my dad, hesitating.

"You don't remember, honey?" she asked with sad eyes.

Feeling tired, I just shook my head.

"We're in El Paso, Texas," my eyes widened with this news. El Paso?

My dad broke through, "You were kidnapped".

Kidnapped?

No I wasn't.

I thought hard. I remember the dance. That was the last thing I remember.

"Date?" I croaked, trying to figure out how much time had passed since the dance.

My mom again looked at my dad who answered for her. "April 21".

APRIL?!?! The dance was March 13. I had been unconscious for over a month.

"You really don't remember anything...?" my mom asked, looking slightly disappointed.

I shook my head again.

Suddenly a feeling swept over me. Pain. I was in pain. Not now. But not long ago.

I shuddered at the memory.

My mom and dad were instantly smothering me. "Are you okay?"

"Do we need to get the doc?"

I shook my head again. "S'okay". I forced a smile on my tired face. The muscles twitched from being unused. I'm sure it was a pathetic smile.

"The police are going to want to talk to you when you're up to it," my dad said looking down on me seriously, "about Duncan".

Duncan. The name sent a rush of memories through me. Duncan and the car, speeding through the streets, away from my home and family. Duncan and the cemetery. Cold, murky, and dark room. Red eyes, Duncan and his red eyes, leaning into my neck.

I let out a blood curdling scream, sending both my parents jumping back in shock. I sat up and screamed louder.

"Bella!" I heard my frantic mom cry.

"Bella!" My dad said at the same time.

"Miss. Swan...?" Startled nurses and doctors were spilling in. I felt hands on my arms, forcing me back down to the bed. I fought them. No! No! NO! I will not be in pain again!!

I fought hard, sending some poor lady back a few steps. I heard my mom sobbing in the background.

I began kicking and contorting my body, trying to shake the many hands off me.

Pain, pain, pain. No. I will not be his food again. Duncan. Red eyes. Pain.

I gave a fierce kick and nailed someone near the foot of the bed. "Oof". I heard the person respond.

"Get me a sedative!" I heard the doctor yell at someone. I continued screaming and kicking. I will never be his food again!

A soothing feeling filled my veins. Against my will, I felt my body relax. My eye lids began drooping. I felt at peace

And then...

blackness.

************

Two weeks later I was home in Forks. The doctors at the hospital in El Paso decided that my physical injuries were healed. Now it was time for my mental injuries.

I couldn't sleep at night without sleeping pills. I spent every night doping myself up with meds and falling into a chemically induced sleep. I would wake up hours later and find Charlie sitting across my room in the rocking chair, shotgun nearby. Duncan had still not been found.

Forks which had once been a safe place to me, a safeness that I had taken for granted, was now a part of my nightmares.

My friends tried to see me, but I wasn't ready. My dad continued to turn them away, daily as they did not go a single day without trying. One morning I woke up and noticed my dad was not in his usual spot in the rocking chair. I heard voices downstairs.

Curiosity over took me and I went and sat at the top stair, eavesdropping.

It was Jessica and Angela.

"....returning to school?" Jessica was apparently asking.

"Not sure, kiddo," my dad told her honestly, "She's been through a lot."

There was silence on the other end. Jess was probably nodding or something.

"Well, tell her," Angela was speaking now, "We miss her and understand. When she is ready, she can call us day or night."

I have such great friends.

"Of course," my dad agreed. I heard shuffling as they walked toward the front door. I quietly made my way back to my room.

I looked out the window and saw Jessica and Angela walking down the pathway to Jessica's car. I sighed and sat on my bed.

I heard my dad walking up the stairs.

"Hey Bells," he said walking in and noticing I was awake, "Your friends just came by."

I gave him a forced smile.

He sighed. I knew he was worried about me. Not about my physical health, but about my mental state. He had not returned to work either. I was silently relieved of that, not even able to fathom being alone in this house for even a few minutes. It would only take a few minutes for Duncan to...

I shook my head trying to get rid of the image of the vampire.

"Well, remember tomorrow is your first appointment with Dr. Brittany at the hospital."

I looked at my dad. Ugh, how did I forget. I had to see a psychologist, to my utter horror. My mom and dad insisted and I resisted. However, he went behind my back and made an appointment anyway.

"Dad," I started, "I don't see how that is even nec--."

He cut me off by putting his hand in the air. "You know what your mom and I think."

"Yeah, you think I am crazy."

Hurt filled his face. "You know that is not true. We both love you and want you to feel safe again. You can't hide in this house forever."

I just crossed my arms and humphed.

My dad took that as his cue to leave my room and I was suddenly alone with my thoughts again.

I did not want to go to that hospital. I did not want to talk to a stranger, a psychologist. I did not want to leave the safety of my house.

What if I ran into Dr. Cullen or some other vampire?

Panic began to fill my chest. I breathed in and out slowly, trying to calm down. I have been home for several days now and not a single glimpse of Edward or his family. The idea of seeing any of them scared me to death. They never had tried to hurt me, not even once. On the contrary they tried to protect me from Duncan.

I shook my head. They were still vampires, bloodsucking demons...

*********

Without anymore argument I found myself entering the front doors of the hospital. Several people glanced at me sympathetically, but luckily no one tried to talk to me. The crowds of people were overwhelming.

My dad led me down a narrow hallway to a set of elevators. Names of doctors on a sign beside the elevator told us that my doctor was on the fourth floor. We were silent in the elevator. Dad, knowing I was unhappy to be here, was giving me my space.

The elevator dinged to signal we were on our floor. The double doors opened and we walked out. A flash of blonde hair caught my eye and I turned my head to the left and saw Dr. Cullen talking with another doctor.

My heart leaped in my chest and I grabbed for my dad, holding tightly to his arm. He looked down at me confused to my sudden clinginess but I faked a smile on my face. I looked again back at the blonde haired vampire and he was glancing at me. When we made eye contact he smiled, a genuine and sincere looking smile. My nerves began to settle. He looked harmless enough. To my advantage, there were at least ten other people standing around this elevator and he would have to take them all down in order to get to me. Highly unlikely. I completely relaxed as dad led me in the door that read Dr. Brittany's office. I snuck one last glance at Dr. Cullen but he had disappeared. I sighed with relief as my dad checked me in. I had seen a vampire without making a scene. I felt elated and like I was on the path to recovery.

*********

I had been seeing Dr. Brittany every other day for a week now. She and I hit it off and I ended up being grateful to her knowledge and gentle voice. She soothed me in a way my mom never could. She eventually told me that my next step to recovery was to return to school. My stomach turned to this idea but she reassured me that I would be okay. Especially since there was only a month left. I could handle a month.

So Monday morning two weeks after I had returned home, I returned to school.

Jessica volunteered to pick me up, so I wouldn't be alone even in the time it took me to drive to school. I was immensely grateful for that, as was my dad, who was returning to work as well. He had made his schedule so that he would be home by the time the school day was over.

Jessica gave me a big hug when she saw me. This was the first time I had been in her presence since the dance. We spent a lot of time talking on the phone the past week. I felt that so much time had passed, I had to get to know her and Ang all over again. Apparently they had been pretty miserable with worry over me.

I was nervous on the drive to school. Not sure what my fellow classmates would think of me. Would they avoid me? Are they scared of me?

When we parked, Jessica gave me a reassured squeeze on my hand and jumped out. Mike and Angela were already approaching. I sat in the car a few seconds longer, breathing in and out. I glanced around nervously, taking in everyone's reactions to my return. Some glanced over but tried not to stare too long. Some completely ignored me, which I liked. I noticed Rosalie's BMW parked a few feet from us. So, they were here. I did not see Edward's car. Maybe he was late?

I got out.

"Oh, Bella!" Angela cried pulling me into a hug. She squeezed me like she was afraid I may fall apart right then and there.

I patted her back as she loosened her hold on me. "I'm okay. It's so good to see all of you again." I smiled encouragingly.

Mike grabbed me and hugged me tightly next. I hugged him back.

When we had separated I tried to laugh off the tension. "So what is new here? What is the latest gossip?" I turned to Jessica who had a smile forming on her lips. "Tell me everything."

We laughed as the three of us began our trek to the front doors.

******

Missing over a month of school was a nightmare on my workload. The teachers were all trying to be understanding, but it was going to take me a month to make up what I missed plus try to keep up with the current work.

I looked forward to lunch, seeing my friends and sitting around people who loved and cared for me. I made my way quickly to the cafeteria, ignoring the stares from other classmates.

I stopped dead in my tracks when I got close to the double doors, making the person in front of me run into me. "Hey," they cried angrily, stepping around me. I completely ignored it, my mind on something much more important. How did I forget? I eat lunch at the same time as the Cullen's...as Edward. Vampires.

My heart started to escalate. I managed to not freak out with Dr. Cullen at the hospital, but that was one vampire. This will be five. Five. OK, room full of students and witnesses. No way would they try anything...

I took a deep breath and stepped forward. I can do this, I told myself. I can do this.

I reached the doors and swung them open. I dared not look at the Cullen table. I can do this, I can do this, I chanted in my head. Don't look, don't look. I can do this. I somehow managed to maneuver my way to my friends table without looking up. I sat down quickly.

"Bells, are you hungry?" Angela asked concern written all over her face. I know my face had to be paler than a....a vampire. My blood had drained all the way to my feet.

I shook my head at her. She looked at me and began to ask me something but I did what I had been telling myself I would not do, I looked.

They were sitting there. Alice, Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper. They were talking quietly amongst themselves, not even paying attention to my arrival like the rest of the cafeteria. Edward was missing. I looked around. Where was he? I remembered not seeing his car this morning. But where could he be?

Alice glanced at me and I looked away quickly.

Breathe...

I tried to pay attention to the rest of my friends conversations. They were trying so hard to make things feel normal for me. I loved them for it.

Biology would be next. My class with Edward, but if he wasn't here...

Why am I disappointed?

Tears suddenly sprang to my eyes. I turned away from my friends so they wouldn't see. What is going on with me? I looked over at the Cullen table again, tears beaming my eyes. Alice and Jasper were watching this time. I shook my head and jumped up.

"Bell--," I heard Mike call out, but I was out of there too fast to even respond. I found myself alone in the long and creepy hallway. I walked briskly toward the office. I want to go home, I thought. I made it most of the day, I did good, but this is too much.

I stopped for a second in the bathroom, clamoring into a stall, tears pooling over. Why am I crying?! I felt pathetic.

I sat down on the toilet, putting my face in my hands.

"Bella?" I heard a familiar voice call out. A harmonious voice.

I immediately quietened and sat still.

I saw two feet approach my stall, and then a soft knock. "Bella?"

I opened the stall and found Alice standing there. Surprisingly I wasn't scared. I jumped up and flew into her arms and she held me for a long time. Her cold and hard body was comforting. This must be what Edward feels like...

After a few minutes I pulled away and blew my nose. I was embarrassed.

"I'm sorry," I apologized trying to recover.

"No," she said softly, "there is no need to apologize." She smiled reassuringly at me.

"I think- I think, "I stammered, "I think I need to leave here".

She nodded.

"Where is Edward?" I asked her, boldly and curiously.

"Thats what I wanted to talk to you about," she told me as I walked to the sink, "but if you aren't up to it--."

"Is something wrong?" I asked, a little too urgently, but fearful of what had happened to him.

"No...but we can't talk about it here."

"Then lets go talk somewhere," I suggested.

"I'll meet you at the cafe in half an hour," she told me.

Next chapter will explain where Edward is now and what he did after he found out Bella was alive.

Please Review! :)