The Uncanny Avengers

Chapter 12: The Wrath of Kang- Part 1

By

The Uncanny R-Man

Disclaimer- All familiar characters belong to Marvel.

Author's Note- I am afraid that the upcoming parody of 'the Winter Soldier' arc will be postponed, as this little plot bunny wouldn't leave me alone. Serves me right for watching the second Star Trek movie...

R-Man's Random Fact- In 'Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan' Kirk and Khan never actually met face-to-face, all of their interaction was via the viewscreen of the Enterprise.

Avengers Meteorite Monitoring Station-

Amongst the belt of meteorites in-between the planets Mars and Jupiter was a monitoring station that the Avengers used as an early-warning system for any cosmic threats. You know the kind, Thanos questing for his latest addition to his jewellery collection, Skrull invasions, the usual. Unfortunately, nothing as fun as that was going on. For the three Avengers stationed in the monitoring station, it had been a very boring few days.

'I still do not understand your preoccupation with this childish game.' Moondragon, the bald-headed telepathic woman, stated evenly. 'We should keep our eyes upon the sensor readings. We cannot be caught unawares by an alien invasion, or Galactus looking for his next meal.'

'Oh, take that stick out of your butt and sit down.' Starfox, the handsome man from Titan with the ability to charm any woman he wished, grinned as he patted the seat beside him. 'Playing poker with just two people is no fun.'

'Gee, thanks a bunch, Eros.' The comically-powered hero known as Quasar rolled his eyes.

'You know what I mean, Wendell.' Starfox shook his head. 'I still don't see why Sam didn't join us.'

'At least somebody takes their job seriously.' Moondragon muttered as she leviateted herself up towards the elevated seat in front of a bank of monitor screens.

No sooner had the bald-headed telepath taken her seat, then alarms began to blare all through the monitoring station.

Starfox and Quasar both jumped out of their seats to see what all the fuss is about.

'What it Titan's name is that thing?' Starfox gasped as he pointed to a giant warship that had just appeared on the monitor screen.

'We'd better patch in a call to Avengers Mansion.' Quasar stated as he punched commands into the nearby communications console. 'This is Quasar onboard the Asteroid Monitoring Station. This is a Priority One emergency! We have sighted an unknown alien warship. Possibly hostile. Cap! Iron Man! Wanda! Is anybody there? We need help. Quick!'

Quasar cursed under his breath as the communication console burst into static.

'Dammit! We're on our own.'

'The unidentified warship is powering up weapons.' Moondragon announced.

'We do have shields on this rock, don't we?' Starfox asked. 'Don't we?'

As if in answer to the alien charmer's queries, the giant warship opened fire on the Monitoring Station, knocking all of the Avengers to the floor. One of the monitors exploded, catching Moondragon right in the face.

'Damage status!' Quasar groaned as he got to his feet. 'Moondragon! How bad did that thing hit us?'

'Great Titan...' Starfox put his hand to his mouth. 'Moondragon... she's hurt pretty bad.'

Quasar looked at another monitor.

'The warship's powering up its weapon systems again. Brace yourself, Eros!'

Avengers Mansion-

The peaceful nighttime of the headquarters of the World's Mightiest Heroes was cut short as alarms began to blare all through the mansion.

As usual, Cap was the first one up. Wanda was close behind him. The Star-Spangled Sentinel almost collided with Jarvis on his way downstairs.

'Jarvis! What's the matter? Why have the alarms been set off?'

'It's the Meteorite Monitoring Station, sir.' The Avengers' loyal butler explained. 'I was going about my duties when the alarms alerted me to a distress signal. the message was a little distorted, but I gather that Quasar and the others are under attack!'

'Go and rouse the others, Jarvis.' Cap nodded in understanding. 'Tell them to meet me in the Quinjet Hangar. We don't have much time to lose!'

'You don't think that it's another alien invasion, do you, Steve?' Wanda asked as she hurriedly fixed her headdress as she followed him down the stairs.

'I'd rather not say just yet, Wanda.' Cap shook his head as he ran towards the elevator that would send them several floors downwards to the hangar where the Quinjets were kept. 'I'd rather keep my judgment to when we get up there and find out just what attacked the others.'

Wanda simply nodded and followed Cap into the elevator.

The Quinjet, later-

All of the other Avengers had been roused from their slumber and were gathered onboard the Quinjet.

'So, what's the what, Cap?' Black Cat asked as she concealed a yawn with a hand over her mouth. 'What's so urgent that you needed to wake me up from a dream about Orlando Bloom and some chocolate sauce?' Wonder Man and the Scarlet Witch looked at the former cat burglar with raised eyebrows while She-Hulk stifled a giggle.

'The Meteorite Monitoring Station that we use as an early-warning system for cosmic threats has been attacked by an unknown warship.' Cap explained. 'We don't know whether Quasar or the others are alive or not, so we have to go up there and investigate.

'You-you mean... go into... into space?' Squirrel Girl stammered, her voice heavy with concern. 'I-I've never even been into space.'

'Neither have I for that matter.' Black Cat added. 'Oh, man. I'm suddenly starting to get a really bad feeling about this.'

'Hey, space travel isn't all that bad, Cat.' Spider-Man reassured his friend, remembering his own jaunts into space. 'Sure, it takes a little while for your stomach to settle down after the initial launch, but apart from that, it's all smooth sailing.'

'Somehow, I'm not filled full of enthusiasm.' Black Cat grimaced.

'Squee-chk-chk.' Tippy-Toe, Squirrel Girl's squirrel companion squeaked.

'Neither is Tippy-Toe.' Squirrel Girl translated. 'Isn't there some way that we could back out of this?'

'Afraid not, Squirrel Girl.' Iron Man announced from his position in the pilot's seat. 'I've already begun the launching procedure.'

'Hey, don't worry so much, kiddo.' She-Hulk patted Squirrel Girl on the shoulder. 'Just think of it as a normal plane flight. Except, y'know, we're going into space.'

'It's a pity that Thor couldn't be here.' The heroine formerly known as Warbird added. she was now going by her old superhero name of ms Marvel. 'We could have benefited from his strength.'

'It's not as if we're running low on powerhouses, Carol.' Wonder Man countered. 'Just look at who we've got. There's me and you, Shell-Head and Shulkie.'

'I'd still feel a little better if we had a Thunder God or two on our side.' Ms Marvel shook her head.

'What's the matter, Carol?' Wanda asked concernedly. 'Are you okay?'

'Oh, I'm fine, Wanda.' Ms Marvel answered. 'It's just that my trips into space have never ended all that well.'

'Everybody hold on tight.' Iron Man announced from the front of the Quinjet. 'Because we're about to take off...'

The meteor belt between Mars and Jupiter-

'Wait. That can't be right...' Iron Man frowned underneath his armoured faceplate. 'My coordinates say that the Monitoring Station should be right here.'

'All I see is more meteorites.' Wanda confirmed with a nod. 'Wait... You don't think that whatever attacked the Monitoring Station could have destroyed it, could you?'

'It certainly looks that way, Wanda.' Cap nodded. 'Tony, are your sensors detected any life signs? Are Quasar and the others still alive out there?'

'I pretty much doubt it, Cap.' Iron Man shook his head. 'If they weren't killed when the Monitoring Station was destroyed, then they would have died from asphyxiation when they were blasted into space.'

'Dammit!' Cap punched the control panel in anger. 'I don't need any more Avengers dying! Keep on scanning. I want to know for sure that Quasar and the others are out there.'

'Um... hey...' Spider-Man piped up. 'I don't mean to ask a stupid question, but since when was there another moon?'

She-Hulk narrowed her eyes as she looked out of the window.

'That isn't any moon! That's some kind of warship! That must be the same thing that destroyed the Monitoring Station!'

'Tony, get ready for an attack.' Cap ordered. 'Full power to the shields!'

'I don't think that'll be necessary, Cap.' Iron Man shook his head. 'We're caught in a tractor beam.'

'Full power to the reverse thrusters then!' Cap countered.

'That might work. If I wanted us to blow us all to kingdom come.' Iron Man stated. 'We just don't have that kind of power, Cap. The Quinjet couldn't stand that kind of pressure!'

'Is it me, or does anybody else feel like we're stuck in an episode of Star Trek?' Spider-Man quipped.

'Such a suggestion is highly illogical.' Wonder Man quipped in return.

'Guys!' Black Cat hissed. 'How can you joke at a time like this? We're about to be captured by God knows what kind of alien beings and you're making the funny?'

'Gallows humour is all, 'Licia.' Wonder Man smiled innocently.

'Yeah.' Spider-Man added. 'We'd go nuts if we didn't make the funny. Well, at least I would.'

'Everybody keep it down, back there.' Cap announced. 'Something's coming in on the comm-line.'

'Well, well, well. It is such a pleasure to meet you again, Captain.'

Cap noticed the blue-armoured face straight away.

'Kang!'

'Oh, I'm glad that you remember me.' The world-conquering time-traveller known as Kang the Conqueror smiled. 'As you will have undoubtably found out by now, your primitive little craft cannot escape from my battleship's tractor beam. Now, please do be cooperative while you are pulled into the landing bay. I don't want you messing up my beautiful new battleship.'

'Kang, what has happened to Quasar and the others?' Cap demanded to know.

'Oh, I couldn't tell you that.' Kang chuckled evilly. 'It would spoil the surprise.'

And with that, Kang cut off communication.

'Dammit, no!' Cap punched the control panel in anger, this time making cracks appear in the monitor screen. 'KAAAAAANG!'

TBC...

Next: The Wrath of Kang- Part 2

What is Kang up to this time? What has happened to the Avengers onboard the Monitoring Station? And what of Cap and the others? How will they be able to escape? Tune in next time to find out...