Chapter 12 – Unimaginable Suffering
Gabrielle and Xena have been crucified and their friends each must confront their feelings of doubt and despair. Joxer and Amarice privately deal with the death of the warrior and the bard and the reality of losing their place to belong….
Amarice: How can this be?
Why didn't I stay and fight? I should never have let Gabrielle push me out that door. I can't believe this is happening. No one can beat Xena. How can this be?... If I had stayed….I never told them. I never said thank you…. I am sorry, Gabrielle. I didn't mean you were weak. I wish you were here….
I try to close my eyes or look away so I can see them sitting at the fire. I hear them laughing but when I look up there they are, on a cross. Dirty Romans. Xena hated them. I hate them. How can this be? Take away my family. I forgot what it was like to have a family. I belonged. … I'm sorry….I will not let this die. I promise. I may not be the warrior that you were. I know you wanted me to understand peace.. but someone has to fight… without you.. Someone has to be the warrior. Maybe I will end up on that cross too. I don't care. Dirty Romans. I hate you. I hate you. I HATE you… How can this be?
Joxer: Please
I have to take them to Greece. Take them where they wanted to be. Where they belong. They look like they are sleeping…. Just sleeping.. just shake them and they will wake up. GABBY! Get up… please. Just get up, please. Hit me, punch me, pinch me… XENA… tell me to shut up, please. Please tell me I am dreaming. What do I do now? Where do I go? I never had a place to belong.
She's sleeping, just sleeping.. maybe if I just touch her… tell me it's not time to wake up.. Oh Gods… they are gone. Why wasn't I here? I should have been here…. We need to go home.. how do I tell Cyrene? Lila? Autolycus? Please, wake up. Please… Gabby… I love you, Gabrielle. Please…..