A/N: TRIGGER WARNING: This story contains mentions of eating disorders and suicide, both in quite a lot of detail.
HEY GUYS! We're so sorry about how long this has taken to arrive! Between Rosie's A Level exams and me moving home from uni we've been struggling to get anything done.
Until next time!
(Totally edited this because I forgot the scene breaks! It should read better now...)
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The two girls desperately clung to each other as they continued to watch Mr Beale advance on their position.
Knowing she may only have mere seconds left with Beca, Chloe shifted her wide eyes from her father back to the girl in front of her.
"Beca, I don't think I can do this without you."
The brunette turned her attention to Chloe as she heard the words and, without hesitation, pulled her closer. Touching their foreheads together and feeling Chloe's hand rise to frame her face, Beca knew that she would never be as free or as comfortable as she was when Chloe was with or around her.
"You don't have to Chloe. I'll always be right here." Casting a fleeting glance sideways, Beca felt all her previous panic returning as she saw Mr Beale less than 40 feet from them.
"Chloe you need to be strong…" Beca began, looking deep into the redhead's eyes. Raising her own hands to cover Chloe's on her face, Beca could already feel her voice shutting down on her again as the sound of Mr Beale's footsteps growing closer hit her ears. "Don't let him do this to you Chloe."
With terror suddenly exploding in her chest, Beca watched Chloe's tearful expression split into a scream as Mr Beale finally reached them and latched his arms around his daughter's waist.
Watching, frozen in place and unable to make a sound, Beca suddenly felt Chloe's hands leave her face as Mr Beale forcefully carried his daughter away, back towards the Centre.
With Chloe's screams continuously ringing in her ears, Beca dropped to her knees, immediately feeling the burden of her fears and anxiety unceremoniously crash back into her reality with the overwhelming absence of Chloe.
Opening her eyes and rolling over, Chloe stared at the wall opposite her. Within seconds of awakening, the memory of her father tearing her away from Beca clouded her vision.
Chloe sighed as she turned on her back, trying to block out her own screams ringing in her ears. An entire two weeks after she was torn away from the small brunette, Chloe was yet to find a way back to Beca.
"Daddy no! Let me go!"
Squeezing her eyes shut, Chloe tried hard to force the memories from her mind.
"Daddy please! NO! Let me go!"
"Chloe stop! Look at the scene you're causing! For once in your life, think about your mother and I! We will not allow this behaviour! I forbid it!"
"Put me down! You have no idea what you're doing!"
"For once in your life Chloe, stop being a disappointment!"
The tears were present long before Chloe noticed them. She had spent days deliberating that phrase, turning it over in her mind. Disappointment.
Hearing footsteps near her room, Chloe sat up and swung her legs out of bed and sat up.
'Disappointment. All I've ever done is disappoint.'
Feeling the bitter taste of the word left in her mouth, Chloe continued to let the shame wash over her and she felt all resemblance of control slip from her life.
Hearing the door to her bedroom gently swing open, Chloe looked up to find her new ward nurse standing in the doorway.
"It's time for your breakfast Chloe," The older woman announced softly before leaving the redhead to get ready.
'Well…' Chloe thought to herself as she rose from her position and looked at her gaunt face in the mirror on her wall. 'At least there's one thing I know I can control.'
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Brusquely dumping his daughter onto her bed, Mr Beale turned to leave when Chloe's cries reached a new level of anguish. Whirling around, he stared hard at the young woman before him.
"It is a sin Chloe. I will not have a daughter willingly committing these sinful acts!"
Watching as Chloe's tears only fell faster, Mr Beale continued out of the room before pausing in the doorway. Glancing back at his daughter, he felt the slightest tug of guilt and he watched Chloe claw at her chest amidst the cries. Shaking it off he continued out the room, closing the door firmly behind him.
With his head bowed low, he looked up as he saw a pair of feet come into his line of vision. Finding the brilliant blue eyes of his wife staring coldly back at him, he felt his anger flare.
"You know very well that this cannot be allowed to happen! So don't look at me like I'm the bad guy here. She might not see it now but I'm doing this for her."
Mrs Beale stood quietly for some time, studying her the man before her. Eventually she sighed and turned on her heel before walking away, pausing only to throw a statement back at her husband.
"We may not like it Jack, but we have to acknowledge that this is her life we're meddling in. You do whatever it is that you think you have to, but think carefully about whether your actions are for her sake or your own."
xxxxxxxxxxx
Beca tore her eyes open as the memory of Chloe's shrieks bounced around her mind.
In the two weeks that had passed, Beca had not only reverted back into herself to where she was before the redheaded beauty had entered her life, but could also feel herself slipping deeper to a place she had never encountered before.
Staring blankly at the ceiling above her, Beca knew that, for all her internal efforts, struggling against her inner demons was pointless.
Turning her head to the side and letting her eyes flutter closed once again, Beca could almost feel Chloe kissing her. The memory of the softness of the redhead's lips pressed against her own causing Beca's heart to lift. Tugs made at her hair by Chloe's hands that spread an unfamiliar warmth throughout her body.
Then suddenly nothing.
"CHLOE!"
"Daddy NO!"
Suddenly jolting, Beca's eyes flew open only to land upon Chloe's empty bed. The warmth that had arisen in Beca at her last sweet memories with Chloe suddenly dropped altogether, seemingly bringing a cloud of darkness over her head.
Every morning was the same, like clockwork. Wake up. Think of those final moments with Chloe. Feel the slightest bit of hope before crash landing back into reality. Be dragged even further into the darkness. Somehow manage to get out of bed. Stumble through the day, not once looking up from the floor.
Today was different though.
Trying with all her might to sit up and get out of bed, Beca couldn't move. It was as though there was someone sitting upon her chest, weighing her down. Trying in vain for several minutes, the darkness within her began to rise.
'What's the point?'
With that thought, Beca turned her head away from Chloe's empty side of the room and allowed herself to be overcome by the black mass swirling around inside of her.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Nurse Kay had seen the whole thing. Standing upon the communal decking watching the two women reunite in the distance, she respectfully turned away once she saw them both leaning in.
Looking to the doorway as she heard the commotion, Nurse Kay's eyes widened as she heard the voice inching closer with every step.
"I wish to see my daughter Roach, I demand it."
Panic setting in, Nurse Kay's eyes flew back to the two women, lip-locked by the lake.
"Mr Beale, I must insist that you return tomorrow. Visiting hours ended over an hour ago." Dr Roach tried to plea.
"I will not! I pay an extraordinary amount of money to you, I will visit my daughter when I see fit!"
Hearing the footsteps upon the decking behind her, Nurse Kay stood still as the two men approached her position from behind. The sudden stop of one pair of feet told her that the two girls had been spotted.
"CHLOE! GET INSIDE THE CENTRE THIS INSTANT!"
Flinching as Mr Beale's voice suddenly boomed from behind her, Nurse Kay watched as he sped towards the girls. The look of pure terror on their faces caused the older woman's heart to break even further for them.
Watching as the girls were ripped apart for the second time, Nurse Kay could see Beca left alone.
Stepping down from the decking, Nurse Kay made her way to Beca. With Chloe's screams ringing clear across the Centre grounds, Nurse Kay hurried her pace as she watched the small brunette drop to her knees, her shoulders shaking with every gasp of air she craved.
"Oh Beca." Nurse Kay whispered softly as she lowered herself next to the young woman. "I'm so sorry."
Seeing the brunette's breathing become even more erratic, Nurse Kay softly touched Beca's shoulder, recoiling instantly as the younger women practically threw herself away from her.
"I'm sorry Beca but I need you to calm down. You need to focus on your breathing!" Nurse Kay knew that if she weren't able to calm Beca down, she'd be forced to sedate her.
That was if Beca didn't pass out before she had to decide.
Watching the small brunette's eyes become unfocused, Nurse Kay glanced down as Beca's arms holding her up began to give way.
Automatically reaching for the small radio clipped to her belt, Nurse Kay quickly requested a gurney to her position before dropping it to lunge forward as the brunette finally lost consciousness and pitched forward, headfirst. Catching Beca's head before it hit the ground, Nurse Kay put her in the recovery position as a precaution and made the necessary checks before sitting back and waiting for help.
Glancing down at the young woman, Nurse Kay brushed a lock of hair from Beca's face as she sighed, feeling tears gathering in her eyes.
There had to be something she could do.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Mr Beale signed irritably as he watched Chloe make her way to the bathroom.
Having sat with her for lunch, he was upset and angry when she didn't spare him a single glance.
Seeing Dr Nicks pass the doors, Mr Beale quickly stood and proceeded to exit the cafeteria.
"Dr Nicks!" He called.
Seeing the man turn around, Mr Beale proceeded to catch up to him before unleashing his anger on the man.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?! I pay you to help my daughter! I sit there with her now and she hardly says a word. She doesn't look at me and it takes her half an hour to eat half a damn sandwich!" Unable to curb his frustrations, Mr Beale continued to verbally assault Dr Nicks.
"Just what kind of doctor are you? From what I see you are completely useless at your job and believe me when I say I will be talking to your superiors regarding your competence!"
After finishing his tirade, Mr Beale took a deep breath as he watched Dr Nicks' stunned face give way to one of annoyance and exasperation.
"With all due respect sir…" Dr Nicks began. "You are the one who tore your daughter away from her support system. Beca was a huge part of Chloe's progress here and ripping her away from that has completely compromised her entire recovery! Now, I am doing the best I can with the damage you have dealt your daughter, not only is she battling her original problems, she now has a broken heart and we are doing everything we can just to keep her head above the water!"
Watching as Dr Nicks turned on his heel and prepare to walk away, Mr Beale definitely felt the guilt coursing through him and Dr Nicks threw back one last statement.
"Now if you'll excuse me, I have to attend to another patient of mine who is suffering from your actions."
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Finally reaching the bathroom, Chloe threw herself into a stall where she proceeded to empty her entire stomach contents into the toilet.
Retching over and over again, Chloe finally pulled back and rested her head against the door behind her.
"Don't let him do this to you Chloe."
If she couldn't control her father's actions regarding her own life, then she would control her body.
Every piece of food would be carefully scrutinized before ingested. Resentment towards food and eating begins to take its place again. Times between eating and then purging would differ as not to arouse suspicion.
Lightly banging her head again the stall door, Chloe thought back to her father's eyes carefully watching her as she ate. She thought about how she completely avoided his stare and pretended as though he wasn't there.
It killed her to ignore her father as she loved him dearly but short of being a disappointment, she had never felt worthy to him. Too many times had she sat on the stairs and listened to her father complain about an element of her life that he was not satisfied with.
Pulling her knees up, Chloe rested her head against her legs as one thought became clearer, weighing down on her mind.
'I don't think I can do this much longer.'
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
A/N: We're sorry this couldn't be a more upbeat chapter but things have to get worse before they can get better right? Anyway we hope you enjoyed it! The next one will be along considerably sooner we promise!
Thanks so much to those of you who have stuck with our story, please tell us what you think!