My endless apologies for the massive delay. Life is still butts and I'm a lazy turd. But that's nothing new.
"No way, I don't believe it! I refuse to believe it! I don't care if you ARE the mayor's granddaughter! Besides, you were with the Koopa Brothers, you WOULD spew such lies!"
"Oh, man... Please tell me I wasn't this bad..." Kobaltia muttered in utter embarrassment, as she and the others stood outside the other jail cell, where the rest of the townsfolk resided. While nearly all of them were jumping for joy at the sight of Luigi's party, and had been more than willing to believe Kobaltia's cautionary tale, there was still one person amongst them who stubbornly continued to refute their tale of the Axems and Koopa Brothers both being false idols. That one person, of course, being the fanatical Koopa who had the key.
"Oh well, you don't HAVE to believe us." Yassie stated, rolling her eyes impatiently, far beyond the point of caring enough to prove her case to anyone else in such a hot, miserable environment. "All that matters is that you guys are free, so it's time for you to uphold your end of the bargain and give us that key, if you'd be so kind."
"Pah! As if!" the Koopa spat, sticking the key firmly behind his back and standing resolute. Hearing the groans and seeing the looks of annoyance on the faces of pretty much everyone else in the room, he shut his eyes and put on a smug grin before continuing. "Why would I give the key to a bunch of Axem hating freaks like you? For all I know, you'll use it to get over to their side of the volcano and try to stop them in their search for the sacred treasure! Ha, and if you guys really are the goody two-shoes that you claim to be, you ain't gonna do nothin' to get it from me either, since I'm nothing more than a poor, defenseless, innocent townsperson! So there, what do you have to say to THAT?"
"Well, for one, if you're trying to keep something from someone, you shouldn't keep your eyes closed for so long if they're in the same room as you, particularly if one of them is an, ahem, ninja." Kobaltia said, holding up the key the Koopa thought was still behind his back and grinning cheekily back at him as all the color drained from his face.
"W-W-W-WHUH?!" the Koopa squawked, whipping his hands around to discover that his key had been silently and unknowingly replaced with a sticky, slightly off-smelling strawberry volcano churro. Dropping it in shock (and disgust), he looked between the three heroes and sputtered, unable to actually form a coherent word but absolutely fuming nonetheless. Luigi and the others, however, were nonplussed.
"So, you guys are good to make it back to Nimbihurst on your own, right?" Luigi asked, turning his attention to the rest of the townsfolk.
"Yup, sure are!" chirped the Toad from before. "And don't worry Kobaltia, we'll let the mayor know you're a-okay!"
"Oh, right..." Kobaltia mumbled, seemingly embarrassed. "About that... Could you uh, possibly, maybe, kinda, sorta... Um, t-tell him I'm... Sorry...? I kind of... Didn't leave him under the best of circumstances, so I don't think he's going to be too happy with me when I get back..."
"You know, that's probably something you should do yourself, Kobaltia." Yassie said.
"Hngh, I know..." Kobaltia admitted quietly. "...Fine, nevermind... Just... Let him know I'm not out of my mind anymore, okay? Please?"
"Alrighty, will do!" the Toad replied, nodding happily.
"W-Wait, stop!" cried the stubborn Koopa, finally regaining his voice. "Stop ignoring me! I'm not gonna just stand here and let you guys continue your dastardly plans to disrupt the Axems! You may've fooled everyone else, but you can't put one over on THIS Koopa!"
"Oh, for the love of..." Yassie muttered, putting her hand to her face in annoyance as the Koopa assumed a "fighting" stance. "Are you REALLY gonna do this?"
The Koopa looked from Luigi, to Yassie, to Kobaltia, and slowly, that steadfast bravado of his melted away. "...H-Hmph. fine. just don't say I didn't warn you when the Axems use you as living pincushions!"
"Right, right." Yassie said, rolling her eyes heavily as she waited for the Koopa to shut up. "You better not cause any trouble on the way back to Nimbihurst. Because believe me, we'll know."
Letting out a slight yelp, the Koopa quickly skulked away after the other townsfolk, who were already on their way out of the volcano, none of them wanting to spend another single solitary second in the furnace.
As Luigi watched after them, he frowned. "Say, Spooky, do you think you could follow after them, just to be on the safe side? Somehow, I don't trust that Toad not to get them all hopelessly lost, even if it is in a straight line from here. And well, I just don't trust that Koopa in general. Just don't get distracted, okay?"
Spooky barked in confirmation, giving Luigi a parting lick goodbye as he took off after the townsfolk, walking with an overly dutiful gait that made Luigi and the others chuckle.
"Well, now that that's out of the way, what say we go and show those Koopa Brothers what REAL heroes are made out of?" Kobaltia exclaimed, handing over the iron key to Luigi and looking ready to take on a nation.
"Well, I suppose we have no choice if we want to figure out where the Dream Caster is." Luigi replied, not sounding particularly pleased at having to take on four tough enemies at once, even with another member in his own party to even out the odds a bit.
"Dream Caster?" Kobaltia repeated, puzzled. "Wait, you mean like, that thing my great-times-infinity grandfather used to defeat an entire army or whatever? THAT'S what you guys are here for?"
"That's right." Luigi confirmed.
"But... Then that means..." It took a moment for the gears to click in Kobaltia's mind, but when they did, her eyes bulged. "Holy cow, THAT'S what the Koopa Brothers and the Axem Rangers have been looking for all this time?!"
"Probably." Yassie stated.
"But... Grampa always told me those stories were just myths, tales that had gotten warped and exaggerated as they were passed down through the ages... You're saying that thing actually EXISTS?"
"Well, we're not a hundred percent sure, but if what we've been told is the truth, then yes, it's real, and it's not the only one there is." Luigi explained. "That's why we're in such a hurry to keep the Koopas and Axems from finding it, if it really is here, because there's a good chance that they're affiliated in some way with... Well, it's a long story, but basically, there's some group of wackos that are trying to gather together all the Dream Casters to use them to destroy the universe, or something to that effect. Unfortunately, we don't actually know where any of them are, but Nimbihurst is the only place that we know of so far where one might be, so, well, here we are. And judging by the fact that those other guys are already looking for something here at the same time as us, it's safe to say that it's not entirely out of the realm of possibility that it actually IS here. Er, well, like I said, it's a lot more complicated than that, but we can explain it to you better once we're somewhere less... Horrible."
"Oh my goodness..." Kobaltia said, bringing her hand to her mouth in shock. "That's a LOT worse than I was imagining!"
"Yeah, it's... Pretty rough." Luigi replied with a small, humorless chuckle. "You know, there's still time for you to go home if you want to, Kobaltia. Like we said, it's not gonna get any easier from here."
"What? Are you kiddin'?" Kobaltia responded immediately, shaking her head vehemently. "This is my chance to be a real, bonafide hero! What could be more exciting than THAT? Why in the world would I want to stay in boring old Nimbihurst when I have a chance to save the ENTIRE UNIVERSE?"
"Less chance of dying horribly, for one." Yassie said dryly. "Oh, I'm sorry, 'Game Overing', rather."
Kobaltia scoffed in indignation. "Please, I know what 'Game Overing' means, I'm not a little kid, you know! And besides, there's no way that'd happen to us! We're heroes, after all! We can't Game Over when there's evil villainry afoot! It's just not allowed!"
Yassie let out a sigh and shook her head. "You may not be a little kid, but you sure are naive as one... Regardless, I know there's no way to talk you out of this, so let's just go. But really, Kobaltia, don't walk around thinking you have some kind of magical armor just because you're a 'hero', that's... Really, REALLY not how it works."
"Yes, yes, whatever you say, 'mother'." Kobaltia replied, rolling her eyes before quickly pointing ahead of the group with great bravado. "But enough talk, let us proceed forward with great haste, my fellow champions of justice! From the sound of it, there is much work to be done, and yes indeed, much justice to be wrought!"
"Only if you promise to stop talking so loudly..." Luigi winced, not at all a fan of Kobaltia's "dramatic" voice.
A short and eventless trip later, the trio were standing at the iron door in the volcano's "main lobby".
"Well, are you ready, Luigi?" Yassie asked, as the plumber dug around in his pockets for the already lost key.
"As I'll ever be." Luigi said with a sigh, as he found the key and reached to put it in the door. As he brought it up to the hole, however, he suddenly gasped and recoiled, whipping around and grinning rather maniacally at Kobaltia. "Wait, wait! I almost forgot, come here, you two!"
"Wait, Luigi, what are you-" Yassie began, her words falling on deaf ears as he took off towards one of the cavern's other exits. Glancing at Kobaltia, who appeared to be just as confused, she shrugged and followed after the plumber, Kobaltia quickly following suit. Soon enough, she realized why Luigi had lead them that way for, and she groaned. "Oh jeez, this couldn't wait until AFTER we dealt with the Koopa Brothers?"
"Nope!" Luigi responded, as he stared out over the pool of lava that sat between himself and the mysterious entrance at the other side of it, his gaze becoming more maniacal by the second before he suddenly whipped his head around to Kobaltia, slightly startling her. "So hey, Kobaltia, what do you say you use that little 'Foot of the Starman' trick of yours to cross this gap and see what treasure is no doubt waiting for us on the other side. eh?"
"U-Um..." Kobaltia looked out at the lava chasm and into the dark tunnel on the other side with far less enthusiasm than Luigi. "Well, okay... B-But if there's anything less savory waiting along with it, I'm hightailing it out of there!"
"Of course." Luigi said in agreement.
"Oh boy..." Kobaltia muttered, taking one last look at the pitch black cavern, before taking a deep breath and going through her little routine. Soon enough, she had entered another trance-like state and taken a step onto the lava, quickly crossing it as if it were solid and not face-meltingly hot. Once she was on the other side, she took another glance at the much closer entry way, realizing it was horribly dark since there were no lanterns on the walls to light it up. Whimpering slightly, she looked back at Luigi and Yassie. "Guys, it's pitch black in there!"
"Gah..." Luigi muttered, before quickly lighting back up as he furiously began to dig around in his pockets, pulling out his trusty flashlight soon after. "Aha! I know better than to ever leave home without this baby anymore. Here, catch, Kobaltia!"
With all the grace of a fifth-string Quarterback, Luigi chucked the flashlight over the chasm to Kobaltia, who fumbled to catch it and nearly fell into the lava in the process, but somehow someway managed to come up with it without turning herself into Koopa soup. Flicking it on, she braced herself, then took a few tentative steps into the still dark passageway, soon disappearing from sight of the others. After about a minute of silence, Luigi and Yassie were beginning to get worried, but Kobaltia soon enough emerged from the darkness, crossing back over the lava and handing Luigi back his flashlight along with the spoils of her excursion.
"Another key?" Yassie stated in incredulence.
"Yeah, but look at how fancy and spangly this one is!" Kobaltia said defensively. Indeed, the key looked far more ornate and important than the beat up ones that the Koopa Brothers had put to use, having a shimmering, almost mysterious star motif to it. "Also, you don't even WANT to know how hard it was to open the chest it was in, that thing was rusted shut! Heck, I wouldn't be surprised if that thing's been there as long as the Dream Caster has!"
"Aw, yeah, now THAT'S what I'm talkin' about!" Luigi said with a grin, thanking Kobaltia and taking the key from her. "See, Yassie? This thing is probably going to be 'key' to finding the Dream Caster!"
Yassie let out a massive, cringing groan. "Ugh, that... That was beyond horrible, Luigi."
"S-Sorry..." Luigi stuttered. "But seriously, this is exactly why you ALWAYS take the side paths first, otherwise you end up having to backtrack later on when you inevitably need whatever it was that was down that side path to progress further on. ALWAYS."
"That... Still doesn't sound quite right..." Yassie muttered, mostly to herself, before quickly shaking her head, eager to change the subject before any more time was wasted. "Well, either way, now that there are no further distractions, shall we go and kick some ninja butt?"
"If we must..." Luigi responded, his shoulders slumping.
Standing once again before the iron door that almost assuredly held a tense, white-knuckle battle on the other side, Luigi steadied himself before putting the key in the lock, slowly turning it until he heard a thick, heavy clunking noise, the lock soon falling to the ground with a thicker, heavier clunking noise. Turning to his compatriots, both of whom nodded in readiness, Luigi put a hesitant hand on the door handle and pushed it open, causing a great, metallic creak to echo loudly throughout the room. Realizing there was no going back, and that if the Koopa Brothers didn't already know they were coming, they surely did after that loud of an entrance, the group burst into the room, weapons at the ready and prepared for anything.
...Well, prepared for anything in theory, at least.
What they actually stumbled into... Well, suffice to say, they were caught off guard.
"Hey, keep it down back there, will ya?! We're tryin' to play a game here, for Bowser's sake!"
Luigi narrowly avoided the greasy piece of pizza that had been flung in his general direction, the perfectly edible and almost assuredly delicious dish becoming ruined forever as it splattered heartlessly against the back of the door. Turning his attention to the source of the flying delicacy, the sight that was layed before Luigi was... Less than intimidating.
The room they were in was remarkably cooler than the rest of the insufferable volcano, likely as a result of the multiple, massive air conditioning units that lined the far wall, and indeed, the rest of the room seemed more like a college dorm room than a volcanic chamber. A massive, big screen TV took up one corner of the plush carpeted room, displaying some ancient looking N64 game featuring a cowboy in a fierce battle with a group of nefarious pigs. Sprawled out leisurely in front of it, sunk into color-coded, suffocatingly large bean-bag chairs, were the Koopa Brothers, none of whom seemed to care enough to tear their attention away from their game long enough to greet their 'visitors' in any manner other than the complimentary mobile lunch. Which, speaking of, they seemed to have plenty to spare, actually, as pizza boxes and soda bottles, some full, some empty, some in-between littered the room and every piece of furniture within it, from the seemingly ready to collapse coffee table to the stuffed to bursting mini-fridge. For a neat freak like Luigi, a room like this was a waking nightmare.
"Uh..."
"Do you not know how to listen?! I said pipe down, you're messin' up our concentration!"
This time it was Yassie's turn to avoid the Noid's favorite thing, an entire box being launched at her and tragically ruined as it sailed out of the room.
"...Is this for real?" Yassie said incredulously, glancing at Kobaltia as if she and Luigi were having a prank pulled on them.
"Of course, this is how my sen-er, I-I mean, the Koopa Brothers always do their training." Kobaltia replied, not a hint of sarcasm in her voice. "They never let me train with them though, so unfortunately I don't know what dastardly ninja tricks they've picked up from these intense sessions. I do know pretty much every other trick in their book, though! I spent a... Well, let's just say, 'unhealthy' amount of time observing them from the shadows, doing my best to learn their most fearsome of moves and maneuvers so that one day, I too may be even a tenth of the warrior that any one of them are."
"...You do remember they were tricking you all along, right, Kobaltia?" Yassie asked with heavy skepticism as Kobaltia seemed to be slipping back into starry-eyed fangirl mode.
"Um... Y-Yeah, I know..." Kobaltia muttered, looking down dejectedly for a moment before perking back up, a look of fierce determination on her face. "I won't stand for being taken advantage of in such a dastardly way and made to look like such a foolishly foolish fool! Not just me, but all of Nimbihurst!"
"Oh, for the love of..."
The image on the TV suddenly froze, as the Koopa Brothers all turned towards the doorway in agitation, half-devoured ammo at the ready.
"How many times do I have to..." Red stopped mid-sentence once he caught sight of he and his brothers' unwelcome visitors, his words seemingly getting caught in his throat once he realized he wasn't talking to an X-Naut. In fact, not only was it not an X-Naut, but it was the two intruders that Sliver had instructed them to keep away from the volcano at all costs! And not only that, but they also had recruited that traitorous blue good-for-nothing to their cause as well! Suddenly, their concentration being wrecked was the least of their worries. "...Oh, snap."
Without another word from any of them, the Koopa Brothers shot out of their seats and through the doorway on the other side of the room with a purpose, abandoning their game and meal, not to mention Luigi's party.
"Well, that was pretty silly of them." Kobaltia remarked with a small giggle. "There isn't any way out that way, they're trapped like Ratooies now!"
Though Kobaltia looked pretty pleased with the development, Yassie didn't look quite as assured. "Hmm, still, I don't think we should give them any time to prepare, who knows what they might have in store for us. Let's hurry up and get after them and overpower them while their guard is down!"
Nodding, Luigi led the others through the lone door that the Koopa Brothers had escaped through, the small hallway on the other end looking and feeling just as comfortized as the room they were just in. A single, metallic door stood around the short bend, and luckily for Luigi, it wasn't locked as he barreled his way through it without a second thought.
And the room they emerged in somehow managed to feel even more out of place than the last one, by a large margin.
"-idiots can't do ANYTHING right!"
The Koopa Brothers cowered in fear under the icy, angry glare of their Ratooie sensei, the image of which towered menacingly above the Koopas from the massive computer screen they stood in front of.
"B-B-B-But Master Sliver, i-it's not our faults!" groveled Red, seemingly just as fearful of the Ratooie's wrath as if he had been in the same room with them. "Th-That stupid loser Blue is with them, she must have been working with them all along!"
"I thought you said you took care of her!" hissed Sliver, looking angry enough to fry an egg on his fuming, spacious forehead.
"W-We did, but she must have found some way to contact her friends to spring her out! I-It's not our fault, sir!"
",,,Uh, you guys know we're standing right here, right?" Kobaltia asked in annoyance, causing the Koopa Brothers to recoil in shock and horror as they finally noticed the group that had been standing behind them for a good minute as they whined to their sensei.
"Ah, y-you dare to show your traitorous mask around here again, Blue?!" Red stuttered, doing his best to sound intimidating instead of intimidated as he still felt Sliver's gaze boring through his skull. "I guess we didn't beat enough sense into you last time, did we?"
"No... I guess you didn't." Kobaltia responded, chuckling and folding her arms nonchalantly, draining most of the false bravado from the Koopa Brothers' faces in the process. "Don't think the outcome will be the same this time around, though. As you can see, I've already loaned out my services to another group of heroes. REAL heroes, that is. True, real life heroes of justice, on a journey to save the world from suffering a perilous fate, not a bunch of losers in admittedly cool and perfectly color-coded masks whose only power is their sickeningly sweet honeyed words meant solely to deceive and use a bunch of innocent, defenseless townspeople for their own nefarious and not at all just plot! Well, I'll have you know that your vile machinations are about to be put to rest here and now, in this very room! We won't allow you disgusting, cruel VILLAINS to enforce your sinister, manipulative will any longer! I, Kobaltia Koover, great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great granddaughter of the legendary hero, Kardarius Koover, along with my courageous justicers-in-arms, will smite you down verily for your horrific mangling of sweet, beautiful herodom!"
Kobaltia struck a dramatic pose as she pointed an accusatory finger smack-dab at the Koopa Brothers, the likes of which were looking amongst themselves with a mixture of worry and confusion as they attempted to digest exactly what Kobaltia had tried to say just then in her epic ramble.
"In other words, we're gonna kick your butts." Yassie added helpfully, providing a translation that even the Koopa Brothers could understand.
"That's right!" Kobaltia exclaimed, drawing exasperated sighs from Luigi and Yassie as they realized she was likely about to go on another minute long diatribe peppered liberally with the words 'heroic' and 'justice' in more forms that should be used in a lifetime, let alone a single run-on sentence. "And after we kick your butts, we're gonna go across the other side of this blasted volcano and kick those smelly old Axems' butts, too! We will liberate the fair citizens of Nimbihurst from the clutches of you so-called 'heroes' and claim the legendary Dream Caster for ourselves! Never in a million years would we let a bunch of hideous justice-monglers like either of you groups of sauerkraut belching funk-fakers lay claim to such a precious and powerful artifact!"
"Gah, d-don't mention the Dream Caster, Kobaltia..." Luigi muttered under his breath, far too late, of course.
"Gah, are you flippin' KIDDING me?!" Sliver suddenly bellowed, his anger somehow spiking even further at the mention of the Dream Caster. "Not ONLY is that idiot plumber and his requisite smart-mouthed companion messing up my plans AGAIN, but they ALSO know about the Dream Caster on top of that?! That person said that he wouldn't even be an obstacle this time around, and that there would be no way anyone would be able to find out that we were collecting the Dream Casters until it was too late! Gah, I knew Sir Grodus shouldn't have trusted that fool!"
"G-Grodus?" Luigi repeated quietly as Sliver continued to rant and rave to himself, the odd name sounding strangely familiar to him, though he couldn't figure out how.
"...S-S-S-Sir...?" Red finally managed to tentatively squeak out, as Sliver finally took a moment to catch his breath. "W-What should we d-d-d-do now?"
"You moron!" Sliver snapped, finally being brought out of his angry trance, his breath heavy and his face sagging to an incredibly disturbing degree. "What kind of question is that?! Hold that fat, red sack of spaghetti and his partners off until I can get there! I need to report this disturbing development to Sir Grodus immediately, then I'll gather every single X-Naut in this volcano to help me deal with with these nuisances myself, which shouldn't take any longer than ten minutes! You don't even need to defeat them, because I already know that that's FAR above your paygrades. All you have to do is keep them busy for ten measly minutes! I'll even put a timer up on the screen for you here! Surely, SURELY even YOU dingoloids can manage to do that! And if you can't, then ohoho, you ain't gonna be brothers anymore so much as one collective brother once I get through with you!"
With that, the feed cut off abruptly, leaving nothing on the screen but the aforementioned ten minute timer, which slowly began to tick down second by second. Both groups looked over at each other with a sudden urgency, and an all out panic filled the room as everyone struggled to figure out what to do.
"Sh-Sh-Sh-Shoot, you guys heard the boss!" Red hissed, as he stood in place and waited for his brothers to get into formation behind him. "All we gotta do is keep these shmucks busy for ten minutes! W-We can do this! We're the Koopa Brothers, for crying out loud!"
As the other Koopa Brothers scrambled into position to strike, Luigi's party muttered hesitantly amongst themselves as they too hastily stumbled into fighting poses.
"Shoot, there's no way we can take all those smelly X-Naut creeps on at once, Luigi!" Yassie urged as she readied an egg. "We gotta knock these fools out and jet!"
"Y-You don't need to tell me!" Luigi replied fretfully as he studied his opponents, waiting for their first move.
...It was about twenty seconds later when he realized they weren't in any hurry to make the first move, both sides standing awkwardly in their battle poses in an extended period for far too long.
"G-Gah, what are we doing?! Let's go!" Luigi cried, rushing forward and leading the charge against the brothers. Heading straight for Red, he readied a jump and let fly, landing firmly on the Koopa's shell... Which he had quickly withdrew himself into, taking no damage whatsoever from Luigi's attack. Yassie's egg shot and Kobaltia's Koopa Leaves landed similarly on their targets, the brothers ducking their heads and limbs into their shells the moment before the attacks landed, negating any and all damage. As they launched this fruitless assault, the first minute quickly slipped away...
"W-What the-?!" Luigi exclaimed in frustration, not at all used to any Koopas using such a tactic.
"You'll have to do better than that, 'heroes'!" Green sneered, he and his brothers retreating further back into the room, taking another ten seconds with them.
"Bah, they're not even gonna try to fight us, they're just stalling!" Yassie exclaimed angrily as she shot another egg harmlessly into one of the brothers' shells.
"Cowards! Cads! Curs!" shouted Kobaltia, shaking her fist in righteous fury at the brothers.
"Kobaltia, less fist shaking, more shell breaking!" Luigi urged, as he rushed towards the brothers to launch another assault, it ending in vain even with the assistance of his Power Smash and Charge badges' effects.
"Ahaha, as if any of you losers have an attack that could break through our shells' flawless defenses!" Black chortled, as he shrugged off another one of Luigi's attacks with ease.
"Oh!" Kobaltia exclaimed suddenly, ceasing her rain of Koopa Leaves at Red's words. Putting on another righteously smug smirk, she wasted more time by shaking her finger in a tsking motion at the brothers before speaking back up. "Are you sure about that claim, oh former sensei of mine?"
"What are you on about now, you nutbar?" Yellow responded.
"Shh, let her ramble, any time she loses is a gain for us!" Red whispered.
As Red predicted, Kobaltia began to go on another lengthy spiel, more precious seconds ticking away with every word that slowly spilled from her mouth. "Yes, it may be true that a Koopa's shell is a veritable tank of armor, immune to all but the very strongest of attacks, but to call their defense flawless?" She folded her arms and threw back her head in a fit of heavy laughter, which went on far too long, before continuing. "I don't know what is more suffocating between your arrogance and your naivety! No defense is truly impenetrable, and while it's true you all may have considered me unworthy to learn your secret ninja skills and techniques, that is not to say that I spent that time just lollygagging around! No, far from it! In that time when you lot left me on my own, I was busy learning and perfecting my own special ninja skills, ones that I'm sure none of you have ever heard of before, seeing as how they were all super special secret techniques passed down and known only to those select few sacred subscribers of the great 'Xx-JiNx_FaNbOi_9035768-xX' on ShroomTube! Perhaps you would like me to demonstrate for you a particularly devastating technique that I was taught by him, known as the Slide Kick!"
The brothers all laughed at the wholly unintimidating name of Kobaltia's 'devastating' technique.
"Oh no, not that!" Red exclaimed, gasping overdramatically in a mocking fashion. "You'd better explain to us in detail just what's so pants-wetting about it, so that we may know just how terrified of it we should be!"
Kobaltia began to open her mouth to do just that, but seeing the looks of mania on her partners' faces, she quickly thought better of it. "Er, I think it's better I just show it to you, for the explanation of its destructive power is as simple as its name." Taking a few steps backwards, Kobaltia quickly broke out into a short
sprint to build up speed before falling back onto her shell, which shot forward towards the brothers like a bowling ball towards a set of pins.
"So basically, what I do is I slide in..."
Instinctively, the brothers all retreated into their own shells as Kobaltia drew near them.
"...Slip under my foe's defenses..."
Right as she reached Red, she brought herself back out of her shell, and jammed a piercing foot right into the hole at the front of his shell, bonking him right on the noggin and sending him careening into his brothers, causing them to scatter all over the room like pool balls.
"...And then I strike their weak point, for... Well, maybe not quite massive damage, but more damage than you would have gotten otherwise!"
Kobaltia hopped back onto her feet and stood triumphantly as she watched the brothers slink back out of their shells and regroup in a panic, Red rubbing his head sorely the whole way.
"See you guys? I'm invaluable to your journey, you wouldn't have been able to so much as scratch these guys without my help!" Kobaltia stated proudly as she too regrouped with her party.
"Yeah, that's great you were able to hit them and all, Kobaltia, but we also only have about six and a half minutes left now, thanks to all that talking you did." Yassie stated, not sounding nearly as pleased as Kobaltia had assumed she would. "And that only hit one brother, and he doesn't look all that shaken up. You'd probably have to do that about twenty more times to knock them all out, and now that they're expecting it, don't think they'll make it easy to get to them."
"O-Oh..." Kobaltia stuttered, her face faltering.
"Don't get down on yourself, though." Yassie continued, seeing the glum look she had unintentionally put on her face. "That was smart thinking, and would have been fine if we didn't have such a tight time limit looming over us. As it stands, though, we really need to think up another tactic, and fast."
"Well, what should we do, then?" Kobaltia asked. "You guys can't touch them, and it'd take me too long to knock them all out with my Slide Kick. If only we had some way to get them to actually fight us and not just hide like a bunch of little babies... It's as if they have no pride at all!"
Staring at the clock as it neared the halfway point, Luigi thought deeply as he listened to his comrades. Suddenly, he turned to them. "Wait, that may just be it!"
"W-What may just be it...?" Kobaltia asked, as she and Yassie looked unassuredly at one another and shrugged before turning back to Luigi.
"If we can't bruise them the conventional way, then we're just gonna have to bruise something else of theirs first." Luigi exclaimed, drawing even more baffled expressions from his companions, before he quickly turned back to the Koopa Brothers and folded his arms, talking loudly and affectedly so that they could clearly hear him. "Gee, and here I thought the Koopa Brothers were a bunch of real bad dudes, but I guess my brother was right after all. They're nothing but a group of big talking wimps! I mean, I'm LUIGI, for Star Road's sake! If they're afraid to fight me, then they're hopeless! Come on, girls, let's get going, I'll bet these guys don't even have any info on the Dream Caster, there's no way that Sliver fella would trust them with something so important if he doesn't even have faith in them to defeat a lowly plumber and his associates within ten measly minutes."
Throwing his hands up and shrugging, he turned around and began to make his way back out of the room, beckoning for his partners to follow suit.
"Wait wait wait wait WAIT!" came the sound Luigi had been hoping for, Red's indignified snort. Turning back around, he saw the leader staring at him with a much more scrutinizing look than before. "...Gah, no way! You're not him at all! You're just some kind of creepily obsessed fanboy that dresses just like him only in a more envious hue! No wonder that loser Blue is hanging out with you, you're like two copyright infringing peas in a pod!"
"...Yeah, let's just go with that." Luigi muttered back, shaking his head and knowing better than to try and correct him. "Did you really think the REAL Mario would have time to deal with you dorks a second time, though? Don't flatter yourselves! He's got way better things to be doing, like relaxing, and partying with famous celebrities, and probably princess rescuing, if things are going the way they usually do. And on that note, we have better things to be doing too."
"Hold it right there, you second-rate sham!" Red scowled, he and his brothers suddenly looking a lot more smug now that they realized who their opponent was. Or rather, wasn't. "You think you can get away with besmirching the Koopa Brothers' good names like that? You just dug your own graves, prepare to face the TRUE onslaught of the Koopa Brothers! Come on guys, let's beat these phonies and show Master Sliver that he has nothing to worry about!"
The Koopa Brothers immediately closed in and took up a more offensive fighting stance, the clock behind them showing five minutes left. It was time for a REAL match.
"Wow, Luigi..." Yassie said in slight awe at how quickly the plumber had changed the battlefield. "That was some quick thinking you did there."
Luigi simply shrugged as he stepped into place beside his partners, hammer drawn. "Eh, if there's one thing I've picked up from dealing with mooks like these guys with my brother, is that their real weak spot is their pride. Hit 'em there, and it gets real easy to hit them everywhere else."
"Oh, is that so?" Yassie exclaimed, a devious smirk spreading across her face as she whipped out her camera and pointed it at the brothers. "In that case, I think I have all the info I need on these guys. So, the great and mighty Koopa Brothers. So great and mighty, that I don't believe I need to do this more than once for any of them, they're such carbon clones of each other. Individual HP is 10, Attack is 2, and Defense is 1. Why, it's almost as if they're just regular old Koopas wearing silly masks with a smidgen more endurance and oomph in their punch. Certainly not enough to cause any of us a real problem, of course. Their defense is, of course, nothing to Kobaltia and her Slide Kick, and surprise surprise, just like regular old Koopas, if we can flip them over, their defense drops to a big ol' fat Yoshi egg. That's zero, by the way. I don't think they've even bothered to learn any new tricks since your brother fought them, the only thing we should really have to worry about is that one team up attack of theirs' that Kobaltia was telling us about, if that hits us, it'll probably hurt a bit, but I don't think we'll have to worry about that."
"Oh, you won't, will you?" Red remarked, before turning to his brothers and nodding. All at once, they began to stack atop one another, forming a supposedly formidable looking tower. "Let's see you deal with this, you smart mouthed twerp! KOOPA BROTHERS SUPER ULTRA DEADLY TEAM UP TECHNIQUE!" Sticking their limbs into their sheels, they began to spin rapidly in place, a sight that surely would've caused violent motion sickness had any of their opponents been paying much attention to them. As it were, however, as soon as they finished charging up, they shot themselves at the heroes like greased lightning, theough none of them seemed too concerned about trying to move out of the way.
"Jump, Kobaltia!" Luigi stated suddenly as the brotherly tower of destruction drew dangerously near, before he pulled a POW Block from his pocket and threw it to the ground, causing a great, sudden tremor all around them. Kobaltia barely managed to follow Luigi's instruction, but the brothers weren't so lucky, as they came tumbling down harmlessly onto their backs, their attack being stopped mere inches before it could collide with any of them. Without wasting a moment of time, the group pounced upon the hapless brothers, pummeling them with a veritable dust cloud attack of hammer blows, jumps, eggs, leaves, and kicks before they even knew what had hit them.
"G-G-G-Guh, n-n-no f-fair...!" Red sputtered, as he and his brothers lay thoroughly defeated before our heroes.
"True, that hardly seemed sporting." Yassie admitted, before grinning and shrugging her shoulders. "But boy, was it fun!"
"Also, you guys have no place to stand crying 'no fair' after ganging up four on one against me like that just earlier." Kobaltia added flatly, folding her arms. "No one ever said justice had to be fair, after all."
"I... Don't think that's quite correct..." Luigi muttered, scratching his head, before catching a glimpse of the clock. "Shoot, though, we've only got a little under three minutes to get out of here before we're in trouble, girls."
"I think you were right in what you said though, I doubt these guys know anything about where the Dream Caster might be." Yassie said with a frown.
"Maybe not, but that's not to say they're completely devoid of things that are of value to us." Kobaltia said with a small grin, as she motioned for the others to follow her back into the last room.
"W-Wait, d-d-don't just l-leave us here like this...!" Red cried out.
"Have fun becoming one, fellas!" Yassie said with a wink, ignoring Red's request as she and Luigi followed Kobaltia out of the room, the brothers all moaning in agony at what was surely to come for them.
"So, remember how I said those guys used one of their secret passages to get me to the jail cell you guys found me in?" Kobaltia began to explain as she led the others back into the dorm room, stopping at the massive television set.
"Yeah..." Luigi responded, raising his eyebrow. "I don't see what that has to do with claiming anything of value from this uh, so-called 'battle', though."
Grinning, Kobaltia reached down to pick up the TV's remote from where the brothers had dropped it in their mad rush
to escape from them, then pressed a sequence of buttons on it, causing the entire TV set to slide into a trap door in the ground, revealing a secret doorway behind it.
"Well, they need somewhere to store all their goodies, right? Well, what better place than in a secret passage way?"
Stepping through the secret entrance, Luigi's eyes lit up at the small treasure hoard that lay in the small, torch lit room beyond it; two coin blocks, two item blocks, a badge block, and three small treasure chests beckoned.
"I dunno what's actually in any of these things, but I know this is where they told me to store anything I happened to stumble across in or around the volcano, so there's gotta be something useful in here!"
"Well..." Luigi began, rubbing his hands together and leering at the treasure in an altogether too creepy manner. "There's only one way to find out."
A minute later, and Luigi and his crew were substantially richer, to the tune of twenty coins, two suspect looking Super Mushrooms, an Ice Power badge, and curiously, a portable blue switch along with two messy stacks of paper that Luigi couldn't even attempt to read in the room's dim lighting. With hardly any time remaining before Sliver and his X-Naut goons would arrive in force, the group booked it down the narrow passageway that lead off from the hidden room, Kobaltia making sure to close the entrance behind them and take the remote with her to cover their tracks. A short trek later, Luigi's party reached the end of the passageway, and after pushing aside a small pile of rocks, emerged within a small alcove in the wall of the cell Kobaltia had been stuck in earlier.
"Alright, so that switch should be our ticket to the other side of this awful oven." Kobaltia stated, once they had made it back to the room with the no-longer-existent bridge to the Axem's side of the volcano and made sure it was clear of X-Nauts.
"Don't see how that could work, but if you say so." Luigi said, plopping the switch down in front of the chasm and hopping atop it. Instantaneously, the boards that were blocking off the entrance on the other side were pulled off by some mysterious force, and magically laid themselves out across the gap, until the no-longer-existent bridge became existent once more. "Oh. That's how."
"...That was weird." Yassie said, blinking.
"Eh. I've seen weirder." Luigi replied, shrugging. "Regardless, we'd better hurry up and deal with the Axems as quickly as possible, before that Sliver guy and his X-Nauts can find us. I... Don't think he'll be very happy to see us."
"Yeeeeah. I almost feel sorry for those Koopa Brothers." Yassie said. "...But not really."
"Yeah, Sliver is... Creepy." Kobaltia exclaimed, letting out a small shudder. "He's super scary when he's mad, which is... Usually all the time. But I don't think I've ever seen him as angry as he was earlier..."
"All the more reason to get the lead out, then." Luigi said with a gulp, giving the makeshift bridge a skeptical look. Taking a tentative step onto it, he realized it probably wasn't going to collapse on them, but not wanting to take any chances, rushed across as quickly as he could, then motioned for his partners to follow suit. Almost as soon as the group had safely made it across, however, the bridge completely collapsed, falling into the lava below and disintigrating.
"M-Mama mia..." Luigi whimpered. "That doesn't bode well..."
"Well... At least now Sliver can't get to us... Right?" Yassie said, trying to think positively. "And surely the Axems must have their own way in and out. We'll be fine, Luigi. Just relax."
"In this place?" Luigi whined, taking a moment to wipe his brow both from the heat and the stress.
"She's right, Luigi." Kobaltia said, nodding confidently. "We have nothing to worry about, we're heroes of justice, after all! The karmic pull of the universe is on our side! Nothing bad could po-"
"DON'T YOU EVEN THINK OF FINISHING THAT SENTENCE, KOBALTIA." Luigi hissed through clenched teeth, his eyes growing wide as saucers and his expression deathly serious. Kobaltia nodded silently back. Though he wished he could, Luigi knew there was no point in putting things off any further, and so, taking a deep, unpleasantly warm breath, he unconfidently marched through the dark, almost completely unlit hallway that led into the Axems' side, whipping out his flashlight to make sure he or his partners didn't step right into a bottomless pit. Soon reaching a stout, metal door, he placed his hand on the curiously cool handle and turned it. Luckily, it wasn't locked, and as they stepped through to the other side, another altogether unexpected sight befell the party.
"What in the..."
Luigi took his cap off, and stared in awe at the massive, automated mining factory that sprawled out before him, both of his companions doing much the same.
"Something tells me these guys are gonna be tougher than the Koopa Brothers... Mama mia..."
So I've had this half written for months now, haven't had the time nor the motivation to finish it until now. Sorry if it's lackluster or anything, and again sorry for the nearly year long delay. I promise I won't let this die, at least. It may take me 70 years to finish, and the Cubs may actually legit win the World Series first, but I won't let it die, dag nabbit.