CHAPTER 12 – ADDICTED

Spencer Porter waited in the weight room at McKinley High for his old coach to meet him for their planned workout. He wanted to be pumped up and look sexy for him so he'd already taken his shirt off and done 100 push-ups and crunches so his body would shine with a fine layer of sweat when Sam arrived.

It was different for him now. Before Sam was unattainable but now he knew his old coach could possibly find him attractive and be with him. In his head, he believed he could be better for Sam than Blaine because nothing would stand in their way of being together. Blaine had too much baggage. He imagined what it would be like for the two of them to be together and nothing seemed better to him. As he sat on the weight bench waiting for Sam, he let his mind drift off into the daydream of what life between them could be like.

(Addicted To You by Avicii – Cover by Corey Gray)

(Performed by Spencer Porter)

SPENCER: I don't know just how it happened, I let down my guard. Swore I'd never fall in love again, oh, but I fell hard.

He imagined Sam showing up in the gym and seeing him and falling for him hard. The two young men would hold each other and Sam would kiss him like he'd always wanted to be kissed.

SPENCER: I guess I should have seen it coming, caught me by surprise. I wasn't looking where I was going, I fell into your eyes.

He could see them walking down the streets of Lima together holding hands and running into their friends, laughing and loving a life together.

SPENCER: I'm addicted to you, hooked on your love, like a powerful drug I can't get enough of. Lost in your eyes, drowning in blue, out of control what can I do? I'm addicted to you!

His thoughts ventured to more carnal enjoyment as he imagined kissing his way down Sam's muscular body while staring into his gorgeous eyes. The idea of being with Sam turned him on so much and he couldn't help but reach down and touch himself.

SPENCER: Midnight blows in through the window, Dances round the room. Got me hypnotized, I'm getting high on the perfume. I couldn't live without you now, Oh I know I'd go insane, I wouldn't last one night alone baby, I couldn't stand the pain!

He loved the idea of watching Sam direct New Directions while he potentially got a job as a local high school coach so they could be together. The idea of settling in with Sam didn't faze him not even if it meant giving up on professional sports.

SPENCER: I'm addicted to you! Hooked on your love, like a powerful drug I can't get enough of, lost in your eyes, I'm drowning in blue out of control what can I do? I'm addicted to you!

He wanted to be with him, wanted to kiss him, hold him, and make love to him over and over again. That was his true desire.

SPENCER: I'm addicted to you! Hooked on your love, like a powerful drug I can't get enough of, lost in your eyes, drowning in blue out of control, what can I do? I'm addicted to you!

Spencer sat with eyes closed lost in his imagination. He didn't even hear Sam walk in the room.

"So are we working out or just meditating the morning away?" Sam questioned.

Spencer's eyes popped open to see Sam standing there is black track pants and a grey tank top. He looked amazing. His eyes traced up the muscular figure of his former teacher until they rested on his face.

Something was wrong. Sam smiled but without the same intensity that always exuded from him, and his eyes were empty. He knew his mentor was trying to put on a show for him because he promised him this workout.

"Actually, you're pretty late and I'm almost done. How about breakfast instead?" Spencer guessed that he needed to talk more than work out.

A bit more light came from his eyes. "That sounds perfect actually. It's been a rough morning."

They put on their jackets and walked towards Sam's car as he offered to drive. Spencer didn't even have to ask. He knew they were going to The Lima Bean.

"So can I ask why it was such a hard morning?" Spencer hoped Sam would open up to him.

"Blaine left to go back to New York. It wasn't exactly the send-off we wanted . . . or at least I wanted," Sam admitted.

"Something you want to talk about or would you rather me distract you?" Spencer offered.

"You think you can distract me?" Sam raised an eyebrow.

"I am pretty damn sexy," Spencer smirked before breaking out in laughter which Sam eventually joined in on. "I'm just saying you could definitely have worse company."

"That is true," Sam agreed. "Unfortunately for both of us, good looking people are the last thing on my mind."

"How about a friend? Will that help?" Spencer genuinely asked.

"That's exactly what I need. Thanks Spencer."

And with that, Spencer felt one step closer to his goal.

-GLEE-

The train to New York was an hour away from Ohio. Blaine, Tina, and Artie were in a private booth in the train. Artie was already asleep. He could sleep through anything. Blaine sat with his eyes closed but the prying eyes of Tina Cohen-Chang knew he wasn't asleep. He was avoiding.

"For someone who just scored the lead role for a Broadway play that will probably be the #1 show this time next year you suck at acting like you're asleep," she pried. "Plus you know me well enough to know that I'm not going to let this go until you tell me what happened."

Blaine finally opened his eyes and looked across at his best friend. She was right. She would never stop and he knew it. "You know what happened. You know Sam as well as I do and you know what his response was."

"He let you go," Tina assumed. "He told you to go back to New York and live your dream."

"That about sums it up," Blaine closed his eyes again.

-GLEE-

"So if you didn't want him to go, why didn't you ask him to stay?" Spencer asked with a half-full mouth of egg sandwich and washed it down with his coffee.

"Because he would've stayed and we would have been happy for a while, but eventually he would have looked at me as the person that took his moment from him, and I wouldn't be able to live seeing that look from him. It would have killed me," Sam revealed.

Spencer saw something he never actually expected. "You really love him don't you? It's not just that he's your best friend or really important to you. You're in love, aren't you?"

"Yes, I'm in love and it doesn't matter because nothing in my life is going to change except the fact that I know it now and have to live with the fact that he's there and I'm here and it doesn't matter.

-GLEE-

"It's a big opportunity for you, Blaine. It's the big break you've been waiting on your entire life and there is no way he would ever let you give that up for him," Tina explained to him.

"And what exactly am I going back too?" he asked. "I get that there is the show, and I do want it. I want this show so bad and I want to be able to enjoy it, but despite that, what am I going back too? Am I just going to stay with Kurt and live in our apartment where we don't talk or spend time with each other? Where we both know we've both cheated on the other? I don't want that life anymore."

"So don't take it. Go through with the divorce. End things with Kurt. Do the show and make sure Sam knows that he is the only guy in this world that you want," she exclaimed like it was that simple.

"Except I'm in New York and he is in Lima. It's not that simple, Tina."

"It is if you want him bad enough. Do you?"

"I don't want to talk about this anymore," Blaine declared defiantly before putting in his headphones and closing his eyes again.

-GLEE-

As the bell to end 2nd block rang out, Sebastian gave last minute instructions to his junior history class. "Don't forget you have until Friday to turn in your proposal for your history paper subject. Don't give me one by then and I get to pick for you. Trust me, you don't want that. See you guys tomorrow," he ended the conversation before turning to one particular student instead. "Stevie, can I speak to you for a moment."

Stevie stopped at the door telling Raven and Octavia that he would meet them at lunch. "What's up Mr. Smythe? I've already turned in my proposal. I'm doing my paper on Elvis and his decisions surrounding the Vietnam War."

"A topic I'm sure you will do great with, but I didn't hold you back to talk about history. Have you talked to your brother today?" Sebastian inquired.

"Not yet, why?" Stevie saw concern in his teacher's face.

"Blaine left this morning after being offered the lead in a Broadway show. Sam insisted he leave to take it, but you and I both know that's not what he wanted," Sebastian informed him.

"No, he wants Blaine, but he'd never stand in his way of headlining Broadway. Which means he is going to dive into work and try to forget how he's hurting," Stevie realized.

"Which we don't need to let him do, and I don't think Blaine wants that either. Which is why I have a plan," Sebastian declared.

"Which is?" Stevie leaned against the front student desk and crossed his arms in front of him.

"Your girlfriend, Raven, asked me for an extension on her paper because she has an audition for the NYADA summer program during Spring Break. She also mentioned that you got the same audition. Why haven't you mentioned it to Sam?" he asked.

"How do you know I didn't?" Stevie refuted.

Sebastian laughed. "That's easy. Because your brother hasn't bragged to me for days about it. That's a really big deal, Stevie. You should really take advantage of it," the teacher's expression changed. "Plus, if you told Sam about it I could convince him that the three of us should go to New York for Spring Break so you can have your audition."

"And he could see Blaine and tell him how he really feels," Stevie realized Sebastian's real plan. "I'm sold. Let's do it."

"After New Directions practice today we'll tell him and get him to agree to our plan," Sebastian concluded.

"I have always wanted to see what New York is all about," Stevie grinned. "I'm going to go tell Raven. She'll be really excited."

Sebastian watched him leave and couldn't help but smile. He was finally doing something good for someone else . . . except for Kurt. He'd never liked him and he planned to take the bitch down.

-GLEE-

"Hey, you got a minute?"

Jake turned around in his office to see Ryder standing at his door.

"I've got about five before Glee rehearsal. Come in, shut the door behind you," he smiled. He wasn't sure what Ryder wanted but they hadn't really talked about the special night that wasn't so he hoped things wouldn't be too awkward.

Ryder shut the door behind him and sat down as Jake did the same. "I figured we should talk about what happened."

"I think that's pretty obvious. You ran away from our bedroom with your impressive tail between your legs. We're friends, Ryder, you could have just told us you weren't ready."

He appreciated that his best friend understood his feelings. "I didn't want to hurt either one of you, and truthfully when we started, I wanted it too but then I wasn't. It's hard to explain."

"Try," Jake requested.

Ryder knew he owed Jake that much so he decided to be honest. "I'm still in love with Marley. I know she's over me and I have no chance in hell, but my heart isn't there yet."

"So it wasn't that you didn't want to be with me and Kitty. You felt like you were betraying Marley," Jake realized.

"I know it's stupid . . ." Ryder began.

"No, it's not," Jake understood. "Ryder, even through everything that's happened, we managed to find our friendship again. I don't want to lose that. You just have to talk to me. And if a time comes that you ever want to try what we have to offer then all you have to do is say so."

"Thanks, that means a lot. I owe you one," Ryder determined.

"Yeah, you do," Jake laughed as he punched him in the arm.

-GLEE-

"I asked Sam to move to New York with me," Blaine finally blurted out.

"What?!" both Tina and Artie reacted at the same time.

"After he told me I had to do the show and he'd never expect me to give it up for him, I asked him to move with me to New York," Blaine confessed.

"Bro, you asked him to give up his job to follow you? Did you think that was the best idea?" Artie questioned him.

"Not my best moment, but it felt right at the time. I didn't want to leave him," he explained.

"Did you tell him that?" Tina inquired.

"Yes, and it was depressing," Blaine looked out the window. "I love him and now I know he loves me, but our lives aren't happening in the same place. I didn't think about it being me asking him to give up New Directions. I just didn't want to leave him."

"What did he say?" Tina hoped it would be positive

"He said he couldn't, but that he loved me and that we'd figure it out, but . . ." he stopped speaking and composed himself. "I feel like I'm giving up."

"Dude, what's your heart tell you," Artie specified. "You need to stop being so angsty and just do what feels right."

Blaine stared out the window not knowing what to do.

-GLEE-

Sam sat in his living room. He was on his second beer when there was a knock at the door. Opening the door, it surprised him to see Sebastian and Stevie there.

"How are you out of school? It's 8pm?" Sam immediately worried about his brother.

"I checked him out. We need to talk about taking him to New York for his NYADA audition," Sebastian let himself into the apartment followed by Stevie.

"Stevie, we've already talked about it. I don't have the money to take you to New York," Sam reminded him. "I'm really sorry. I wish I did."

"That was before you had a best friend that could fly you there and you could stay in our family's apartment there. We're going and you can't tell me that you don't want to go," Sebastian teased.

"What is the point, Sebastian?" Sam knew where Sebastian was going with the thought. "It will just make it harder for me to move on."

"Why do you need to move on?" Stevie spoke up. "You love Blaine. He loves you. That's all that fucking matters. Go after him."

"Stevie . . . " Sam started.

"Don't Stevie me. I want you to be happy and that's all that matters to me. You owe it to yourself to give this relationship a chance. My brother, the one I always look up too, would not give up so easily," Stevie declared.

As Stevie and Sam continued to argue, someone else knocked at the door. Sebastian walked over and opened the door. He couldn't help but smile. "Hey, Sam."

"What?" Sam sounded annoyed.

"I think our conversation needs to change," he opened the door and Blaine walked in.

"What are you doing here? You have to be at the show tomorrow," Sam walked over to him forgetting Sebastian and Stevie were even there.

"I don't care. I quit. You're more important to me. I want to move back to Lima and be with you," Blaine declared.

"Are you serious?" Sam couldn't stop the smile that crossed his face.

Blaine walked out the door and came back in with his bags. "I got off at the next train stop and got on another to get back here. I love you Sam. I'm not going anywhere."

Sam wrapped his arms around Blaine and the two started kissing.

"I think we should probably leave these two alone," Sebastian whispered and he and Stevie left Sam's locking the door behind them.