Chapter 12
Sara was usually very careful about her menu choices, especially when they went 'Italian' where it was really difficult for her to resist pasta dishes. At 47, she no longer had the diminutive frame she'd had in her twenties but she still looked amazing and she worked hard to maintain a healthy body weight. She watched what she ate and she worked out at the employee gym at Sterling Bosch every chance she got. But after two babies and a couple of decades, it was definitely more of a struggle to maintain that healthy weight so she worked hard on a daily basis to make healthy meal choices.
She looked the menu up and down and mused: 'I think I might let myself be tempted by pasta tonight, I was particularly active today' she said as she sent a meaningful look Neal's way.
He just smiled back at her knowingly.
'What are you having Neal?' she asked.
'Well, I am starved and I am going with the ... Fettucini Avelinno' said Neal, with conviction
'I'm having the veal' said Hope as she put down her menu. Hope was not a picky eater – except for asparagus which she had disliked since she was a toddler. Anything else was fair game and she could make do with just about anything.
'What about you, honey' Sara asked as she touched Liam's arm 'You're not looking like your usual chipper self – this is your favorite restaurant'
'I guess, my usual, the lasagna' he said without much conviction
'Are you sure you're okay, honey?' asked Sara
Usually when they went to Graziella's Bistro which was Liam's favorite local Italian restaurant, he was excited and animated but he was much quieter than usual on this Friday night.
'What's wrong?' asked Neal, obviously out of the loop. Being out of town had its disadvantages when it came to being up on the kids' frame of mind or their activities. Their moods could change so quickly and from one day to the next, it was difficult to know what was going on with them.
Hope seemed to be out of that awkward stage where hormones were all over the map and behaviors erratic but Liam was right smack dab in the middle of raging hormones and his mood and behaviors were unpredictable and constantly changing. One day, he could be kind and accommodating and the next, he was moody and irritable.
'He's just not eating like he should' answered Sara as she lifted her hand to touch her son's forehead to check for any sign of fever
'Mom, please' moaned Liam as he pulled away from her touch
'Alright' Sara said, resigned. There was no sense insisting and ruining the atmosphere; it was Friday night, her favorite moment of the week – the time when they got to sit together as a family and talk about their week and share a meal.
Neal and Sara sat across from each other and continued to give each other secretive, suggestive looks as all four of them tucked into their meals. Their little escapade that afternoon had added some excitement to their sex life and after spending the last few nights alone in their bed, Sara was looking forward to sharing the space with Neal once again. She hoped he would be up for an encore performance when they finally made their way home. After all, they needed to make up for lost time...
'So, how's the investigation going?' she asked 'Have you finally caught this guy?'
'Not quite' said Neal, careful of his answer 'We were able to trace some of his movements but he was no longer in Tucson so...'
'Who is this guy anyway? A thief?' she asked, urging Neal to continue
'Yeah, he's wanted on a number of art thefts but he's quick – and smart. Peter mostly wanted to interview some people to gather some intel on him' he continued, milking the lie
Although he was taking no pleasure from lying to his wife, Neal was surprised to see just how easily he could still fabricate stories. He had always had the ability to think on the spot and give information without really answering questions directly. Of course, Sara knew all about this talent of Neal's but he had not indulged in story fabrication since they had been married – at least not on a regular basis – and Sara thought she knew him well enough to spot those carefully constructed lies. Her radar seemed to be malfunctioning though and the conversation fell to the kids, their school activities, their plans for the weekend and the highlights of Sara's week at work.
Neal and Sara continued to sip their wine while they gazed at each other like a couple of lovesick teenagers. Sara's foot, which she had slipped out of her shoe was making its way up and down Neal's shin and he smiled appreciatively, anxious to get home to Act 2 of that afternoon's performance.
'Ugh, Mom' said Hope suddenly 'Are you playing footsies with Dad? This is family restaurant!' she shrieked in mock horror at her parents' lascivious behavior.
'Busted!' said Sara
Neal just looked at his daughter and shrugged 'I don't know what you're talking about'
WCWCWC
Saturday morning arrived along with another Caffrey tradition: Neal's bacon and eggs with French toast. The funny thing was that, after everyone devoured the contents of the entire platter Neal had placed on the table, they all seemed to disappear leaving him with all of the cleaning up.
Neal finished putting the last of the dishes in the dishwasher and after wiping down the kitchen counter, he came up the stairs and started towards his bedroom. As he got closer, he could hear a commotion and he cocked his head around the door jamb to see what all the fuss was about.
'I can't find it anywhere!' Sara was grumbling, visibly upset. She was opening and closing dresser drawers, removing articles of clothing, moving stuff around and the more she looked and didn't find, the more flustered she was becoming.
'Hey, hey, what's going on?' asked Neal as he walked into the bedroom stepping over some clothes that had spilled over onto the floor
'My picture… of Emily, I can't find it anywhere' she said, slightly breathless as she continued to move around the room, not even bothering to look up at him.
Neal gave himself a mental head slap. He had 'borrowed' the picture for his trip out west and he had totally forgotten to put it back where Sara normally kept it, in her special keepsake box at the back of their bedroom closet. He knew exactly where the photograph was – it was in the side pocket of the suitcase he had used when he'd traveled to Tucson. He could put Sara out of her misery in two seconds flat but admitting to where the photograph was meant admitting to much more – like why he had it in his suitcase in the first place. He hated the thought of conning Sara but he couldn't come clean with a full confession; he had to find a way to calm her down without giving up his secret.
'I'm sure it's somewhere, honey. When was the last time you saw it? You had it at the cottage in August, remember?' he said, trying to appease her without giving up too much
'Oh, my God. What if I left it there!' she squealed, even more distressed 'Neal, it's the only picture I have of Emily'
'Sara, Sara, come here' said Neal, deciding to go with a distraction tactic. He had to find some way to soothe her - another couple of minutes and she would be totally hysterical.
Neal walked up to Sara and took her arm, nudging her to sit with him on the edge of the bed.
'You know what it's like when you're looking for something – the more agitated you get, the less likely you are to find it' he said in a calm, reasonable voice that belied his rapidly beating pulse
Sara looked up into her husband's eyes and he could see tears about to spill out. God, he felt like a jerk, causing her worry when he could make it all go away.
'Look at me' he said, calmly 'Go downstairs and make yourself a cup of tea and let me look for it, okay?'
'But - ' she began as Neal pressed a finger to her lips
'Go downstairs and make yourself a cup of tea' he repeated, slowly to accentuate his suggestion
Sara sighed deeply. 'Alright, alright' she finally said as she stood up and began to pick up some of the clothing that had fallen to the floor
'Leave it, Sara, I'll get it' said Neal, anxious to get her out so he could put her out of her misery as soon as he possibly could.
Sara walked away, shoulders slumped, sad and upset and the moment Neal heard her turning the corner, he ran to the closet where his suitcase had been stored and instantly he had the photograph of Sara and Emily in his hands.
Sara had left home on bad terms at the age of 21 and a few years later, her parents had both been killed in a car accident. She had never gone back home and she had no idea what had become of all their possessions. The one and only photograph she had of her sister was one they had taken while on their trip to England when she was twelve years old. Emily had left a few weeks after their return and the photograph embodied the closeness and intimacy that had grown between them during those wonderful weeks that summer. Sara kept it preciously and she took it out every August when the anniversary of Emily's disappearance came around. Why was she looking for it now?, Neal wondered.
He grabbed the picture, counted to ten and slowly made his way to the kitchen where Sara was putting water on to boil.
'Got it!' he announced, as he waved it in his hand
'Oh, thank God' exclaimed Sara as she took it from his hand and clutched it to her chest 'Where was it?'
'It had fallen between the headboard and the wall' lied Neal, smiling with relief at seeing his wife visibly relax
'How did that happen?' asked Sara rhetorically
Neal just shrugged – another silent lie.
'Thank you, Neal' she said, breathless as she gave him a quick kiss
'Why were you looking for it, anyway?' Neal asked, curious at the coincidence.
'I don't know… she's been on my mind constantly lately. I just felt the need to look at her face' said Sara, staring down at the photograph once more
Neal ran his hand gently over Sara's hair and she looked up at him once again
'Sorry I got so flustered' she said, looking into his eyes 'I guess I kind of lost it there for a minute'
Neal continued studying her face. What was he doing? Should he be coming clean with his wife about his search? Sure, she'd told him to leave it alone but did she really mean it? Was there a chance she might be happy to know what he was doing behind her back?
If it all ended happily with Sara and Emily reunited, he hoped that Sara would forgive him for his deception – well, eventually forgive him, anyway. If he couldn't find Emily, he had decided he would keep quiet and not tell Sara what he had been up to. The third scenario, which was finding out Emily had died, would be the hardest to deal with. He couldn't decide if he would share that news with his wife or if he would let her continue believing that Emily was safe somewhere. If that moment ever came to pass, he would have to decide if he should tell Sara or not.
He wasn't prepared to face that possibility just yet.
TBC