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Take What You Want

Chapter 12

Word Prompt: Crooked

Audio-Visual Challenge—Imagined Image: Picture of an orange traffic cone on a frozen lake.

Playlist: Trouble by Never Say Never

My Life Would Suck Without You by Kelly Clarkson

Edward calls me every hour on the hour to apologize for chipping my tooth. What he doesn't realize is I'd give anything for him to apologize for being a jerk and saying those awful things he didn't mean.

I certainly believed him when he said them but seeing the picture of the two of us on his phone – as his freaking wallpaper – confirmed the fact that he's a lying liar that lies. I should've known this already, though.

Alas, I am stupid.

And still mad. As much as I'd love to just let things go back to normal, they can't. Not really. Not until we address his behavior. I apologized – rightly so – I had no business letting him touch me and kiss me when I was Mike's girlfriend. The whole thing is just so messed up, but I still want a connection with him. Any connection with him. I know it's pathetic, but I'll take what I can get. I just hope that my apology will influence him to say sorry as well. If he doesn't, I'm not sure we can get past this.

My phone chirps with another text from him. I stopped answering it at midnight because I wanted to sleep, and it was annoying. But he didn't take the hint and kept calling. I think I have six or seven voice mails and about nine texts. Each one gets progressively worse, as in stupid.

Are you still mad at me?

I said I was sorry, brat.

Why can't you let it go?

It's your fault you ran like a crazed psycho.

My mom says I should stop bugging you. Is that true? I don't want to because I like to think about how pissed off you look when you pick up your phone.

And it's me.

Again.

I can't wait to make fun of you on Monday. You look like a hick.

Each text makes me laugh. He's so dumb, but it's nice to be a part of his life again. I really did miss him. I roll over on my bed and check my latest text.

Okay, I'm sorry. I mean it. I took a shower. I even cut my fingernails. TALK TO ME!

It's time to take pity on him, so I write him back.

No, thanks. I'm going to bed. And I'm naked.

His response is immediate.

ljflgu;oirnvlfkvnidfg;kjfgl[090956[e'seglk!

I cover my face with my pillow to muffle my laughter. My phone beeps again.

Goodnight, sexy girl.

Oh, so now I'm sexy, am I?

You've always been sexy.

You're such a liar. What about Angela and Jessica?

What about them? I only think about one girl. My girlfriend, Bella.

I sit up and gape at my phone.

It's Mike.

Oh my gosh . . .

In my haste to cover, I type a quick message.

Good, that's what I was hoping for. Goodnight.

I toss my phone in my nightstand and promise not to touch it again. I can't believe I did that.

-TWYW-

I'm snacking after Saturday morning yoga with Mom when the doorbell rings. Edward's at my door. What is he doing here? Maybe he's here to apologize. For real. But I can't count on that, so I say, "Hey," and take a bite of my banana.

He looks me up and down and throws himself backward onto the walkway as though he's fainted.

"What are you doing?" I say through laughter.

"Shh, I don't want to forget this moment."

"What moment?" I step between his legs and bend over him, my banana peel dangling in his face.

"Why do you have to ruin everything?" he asks, swatting my peel away.

"I don't. You do. Besides, I already apologized. You—"

"I apologized like fifty million gajillin times."

"For my tooth," I say, giving him a cheesy grin and helping him up.

"Yeah." He shrugs. "So . . . you stopped answering your phone."

"That's what my dad said to do if I was being stalked."

"Ha ha, funny. So, anyway . . ." His face is mockingly stern. "You're coming with me to the airport."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are."

"I'm all sweaty, and I need to shower, and—"

"The only one that cares about showers is you."

"You really believe that, don't you?"

"If you need to change, change." He points to my bare midriff then looks away quickly.

-TWYW-

After an embarrassing conversation where my mother compliments me on my figure and flexibility in front of Edward, I shower and get ready, much to his annoyance.

At the airport I discover Edward's love of strange places to eat, strange things to do, and strange people to watch.

I eat some yummy macaroni and cheese while he indulges in three sliders with sweet potato fries.

"Where's Angela? Shouldn't you be with her?"

"Devotional," he says through a mouth full of fries.

"That's . . . well, I can't make fun of that. Good for her. Getting spirit-ified or . . . whatever."

"Did you know this is the only Fred's Grill?"

"Nope."

"Best sliders in the state," he says, nodding to his plate where the remains of his sliders reside.

We spend the rest of the meal chatting about nothing important, but our dynamic isn't quite right. It's weird, but that's to be expected since he's being too chicken poo to really talk about what we need to talk about.

We walk aimlessly around the airport, window shopping for no reason. I try on some sunglasses and seeing my chipped tooth gives me an idea. I speak with the store clerk and collect some supplies then steal Edward away from the Maxims.

I hand him a small cardboard box. "Okay, rip this part off," I say, showing him the top of it. He does, and I write one word on it. Homeless.

I pull my ponytail holder out and ruffle my hair. I hold the sign in front of me and let my mouth hang open so my teeth are visible. Edward guffaws openly before pulling me by the hand and finding a place for me to sit.

He reads a discarded magazine within viewing distance and cracks a smile when I occasionally get up to tap dance in hopes of catching a few bucks from passersby.

I've just collected a dollar when Edward rushes me. "Security, come on, come on," he chants, tugging me by the arm. We pass a corner and double over in laughter as the overweight guard walks past us.

I catch my breath and fix my hair while watching Edward's shoulders shake with quiet laughter.

"You look so dumb," he says, and the laughter begins again. "Allons-y."

"Oui, oui, mon petit chou chou."

He keeps giggling as we head to the elevators. He's absolutely adorable when he laughs like this, eyes crinkling in the corners. He looks open somehow, reachable in a way. I love him like this. I want him to always be like this.

"I don't really wanna go home," I say, and he looks me over carefully.

"Hmm, okay, 'cause I have a idear." He smiles with his top teeth, and I copy him, so we look like a bunch of buck tooth losers.

Edward sticks me on a moving walkway, and then power walks beside me. I can't remember the last time I had this much fun. Probably the last time I was with Edward.

At the end of the walkway, Edward snags a "wet floor" sign and two orange cones.

"That's wrong," I say, thinking about all the poor slobs that will slip on the wet spot.

"Oh, and stealing money from strangers pretending to be homeless isn't a little crooked?"

"I'll donate it," I say, defending myself, but really I wanted to buy a shake.

"It's dry; I checked it. Come on, hurry." He looks over his shoulder to make sure no one's watching us.

He ushers me down the wide hall, and we place the cones and sign near a McDonald's. Then we sit and watch.

McDonald's gets a lot more traffic than I ever could've imagined.

We giggle like fools while people of every size, shape, and color go out of their way to step around the cones. One man even slips near the sign, and Edward and I lose it in laughter since there's no reason he should've slipped.

Our shoulders knock together, and Edward slides his hand into mine. I don't want to, but I look at our hands together. It's beautiful and feels so right. And different from the other times he's held my hand. He sighs as he catches his breath and knocks his head on the wall behind him. "Hey," he says.

"Yeah?"

"I'm really sorry," he says, eyes closed, and I know exactly what he's talking about. It's not the epic groveling seen in a movie, or even very profound, but it's perfect for Edward and me. It's just what I need.

"Thank you." I squeeze his hand to let him know how glad I am to be here with him.

"I really like her, you know."

"I thought so," I say and play with his fingers.

I probably shouldn't be doing that since I'm Mike's girlfriend, but there's just something about Edward that draws me to him. Yet at the same time, there's something about Mike that appeals to me too. He's straightforward and motivated and clean-cut. Everything I thought I wanted in a guy, and I feel like I have to give that a chance – see if it works. I owe it to the both of us. It doesn't help either that I've been crushing on him since last year, and I hadn't even given a second thought to Edward until he started hanging out with us over winter break. The whole situation is exhausting, so I decide to give it some breathing room. We all just need to be for a while, I think, and that's what I hope to convey when I say, "We'll just have to see what happens."

"Yeah, I guess." He says it like an exhale, bringing his head level and finally looking at me. "I'm glad you're talking to me again."

"I'd never stop talking to you."

He smirks and says, "That's because I'm irresistible." He pinches my cheek and tugs my ponytail.

-TWYW-

I'm coming out of the lunch line when a hand settles on my waist. "Hey, you," I say, and I'm surprised when I turn around and see Mike. This is really getting confusing.

"Hey, oh, you didn't get your tooth fixed. I thought—"

"Nope, you thought wrong." I take my seat with our friends, sitting across from Edward. "You like it, right?" I give him a dorky smile, and he sits beside me, looking worried. "I'm going to the dentist next Monday."

"It's been two weeks; why so long?" he asks.

"I kinda think it's funny," I say.

"I just love her," Edward says, pointing at me, and Angela nods in agreement, smiling. She's very cute in a little sister kind of way.

I laugh at Edward's words, thinking about my homeless sign which he stole after our excursion to the airport.

"You're a trip, Bella," Mike says, digging into his sandwich.

"That's why you like me."

"I think you're right; you always make things fun." He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively and leans in for a kiss.

Moments like these, where Mike is okay with public affection are few are far between, and I generally don't mind them; however, when Edward's around, they make me nervous.

Instead of kissing him, I give him my best buck tooth grin to dissuade him. It works, thankfully.

Angela throws away her trash, then stands next to Edward playing with his hair. "You ready?" she asks him.

"Yeah, baby." He grips the back of her jeans and follows her out the door with a wave.

"Is it just me, or is he different with her?" Jasper asks.

"It's not just you," Mike says. "He's like a human being now."

Alice and I exchange a look. We've been talking about Edward and Angela a lot lately, not sure what to think about them. Edward assured me that he just really likes her. Which is good, I guess.

"I don't know. I don't think it's right the way he's changed for her. I kinda like stupid Edward," Emmett says.

"You would," I quip.

"Like you didn't like him all hyper and dumb," he says, throwing a chip at me, but Mike defends me by blocking it with his plate.

That's when the food fight begins. It lasts approximately fifteen seconds before we're shooed out of the cafeteria.

Oh, well.

-TWYW-

We're all at the park playing volleyball together – four against four. Alice and Emmett refused to be on a team together, so Mike and I are paired with Alice and Jasper, which is fine, except that I have to watch Edward the whole time.

He's laughing and playing hard and throwing Angela around like a rag doll every time she does something right. Which is often. Why does she have to be athletic when I'm not? Sure, I have good balance and can strike a mean yoga pose, but that doesn't equate to being able to bounce a hard ball off my wrist and over a net.

After the third time I get hit with the ball, I call it quits and hide out in the ramada. Edward joins me soon after for a water break. He sits beside me on the table and bumps my shoulder. "Why aren't you playin'? he asks.

"I'm done getting hit in the face with balls."

"Okay, I . . ." He tilts his head and smiles wide. "I'm not even gonna touch that one."

"Good for you, Edward. Growing up finally, I see."

"You wish," he says.

And that I can't let go. "Hardly."

"Aw, you do love me, ball girl."

"Whatever."

We sit in silence, watching the others mess around in between games. Emmett throws Rose over his shoulder and takes off running. It reminds me of Edward immediately, and I wonder if he'll ever throw me around the way he does all his girls.

"Can I ask you a question?" I ask, chewing on my fingers.

With his lips around the water bottle, he simply raises his brow.

"You said 'that was different' when I mentioned you kissing Jessica in front of me while you were dating. What does that mean? How was it different?"

"You wanna talk about this now?" he asks, pointing to our friends.

I think on it for a second but worry I won't have to courage to ask again, so I say, "Why not?" to make him feel like a chicken.

"Fine, well, she was just a whatever. I didn't care about her at all. And she knew that – even when I asked her out – I was very specific. And she was specific too. She was basically using me – 'always wanted to try out Edward Cullen,'" he says in a girl's voice.

"She did not say that." I place my elbows on my knees and study the concrete, so I don't draw attention to my quiet laughter.

"She did. I didn't know how you felt, and you wanted to get rid of her, so I just thought, whatever, ya know. But I knew as soon as she dumped me, or as soon as you admitted we had something, that I'd dump her to be with you."

"But why were you so mad at me?"

"Look, I know I was a jerk to Jessica. I flirted with you all the time, but I never kissed you, never cheated. You were with Mike, and you let me kiss you, let me think I had a chance. I was pissed. You knew how I felt all along. I always wanted to be with you, and I didn't hide that. You did."

"I wasn't hiding it," I say shamefully. "I just didn't know."

"Well . . . it is what it is." He slouches beside me and nudges my knee with his.

"Edward, come play!" Angela waves him over, and he runs to her, picking her up by the waist and running her around the sand like she's a football. It's so hard not to feel sorry for myself, but I have Mike. And I want to make that work. I will try to make that work.

-TWYW-

"Hi," I say, opening my door wide to Mike so he can come in. It's date night: Saturday. The one night for sure I know I'll see him because there's no sports and no student council meetings.

He squints his eyes and forces a laugh, rubbing his arm. "I thought you said you'd be ready. Last time I missed the previews because I was standing in line for your popcorn."

"I'll just be a minute." I kiss him on the cheek, and he forces another smile before sitting on my couch to wait.

I stay upstairs a bit longer than needed because my dad is wandering around the house, and it's always fun when they end up talking. Dad is not friendly with Mike. Like at all. I know it should bother me, but it makes me laugh, really.

At the movies I get bored. There's only so many times I can watch an explosion. I go to the restroom and come back to see the end of the action sequence I just left. Damn, John Woo. I have to do something about my boredom, so I lure Mike into a kiss.

We make out for the last twenty minutes which is much more entertaining than that dumb movie with too many guns and too much cleavage.

In my driveway I lean over to give Mike a thank you kiss for our date, but he pulls me closer, my stomach digging into the stick shift awkwardly. Mike groans and grips my thigh, breathing heavily on my neck. "Do you want, I mean . . . can we get in the backseat?"

Oh my gosh . . .

It's my turn to force a smile this time. At least I got my tooth fixed and he's not grimacing anymore every time my teeth come into view. "I should go in; it's late," I say, then kiss him again with much less tongue than I've been using.

"Okay, yeah." He grips my face in his hands and kisses me hard. It's difficult to think when my hormones are raging like this, but I know I need to go inside. This is just too much, and I know I could never sleep with him when I still like Edward. It's just wrong. In fact, this whole thing is feeling more and more wrong the more I let it go on.

I break off our kiss, catching my breath. "Mike . . ." I start, hoping to say the words I should have said after our first kiss.

"I know; I'm sorry. Just one more." He kisses me one last time tenderly, and the sweet smile on his face afterward breaks my resolve. "Hey, um . . . will you go to prom with me?"

"Prom?" Well, that was unexpected.

"Yeah." He nods and grabs my hand, placing it on his heart, stroking it.

"Sure," I say.

And regret it immediately.

A/N: Special thanks to cejsmom, _ss77_, aidan_momma, and msjxteller for prereading this baby. And if you're wondering aidan_momma and msjaxteller are the genius behind 90% of the playlist. They rock!

I made a silly blinkie for this story. It's on the blog if you want to take a looksee.

Dirtyflirtward's waiting at The Lemonade Stand for you! He's sad and lonely there and low on the totem pole. Bring him a cookie to cheer him up, will you?