BGM: Sunday Dress by Dala

[Mr. Cardin Winchester was discharged from the army shortly after the war ended. Now, he worked as one of the Peacekeepers, people who strive to bring together the Human and Faunus populations. Their major activities include creating social events, support groups, and educational platforms so that the two races can better understand and appreciate their differences.

A Huntsmen himself, Mr. Winchester was well-respected by his co-workers. This was evident in their open admiration and affections toward Mr. Winchester when I toured their headquarter. He smiled embarrassedly when I expressed my observation. I sensed something else in his expression, but didn't understand what it was.]

I used to hate Faunus. [He paused to examine my reaction. When he saw my shock, he laughed softly.]

Did that surprise you? Well, you aren't the first. Most of my pre-war associates looked at me like I'd grown two heads when I told them I'm working for PAEFA [*]. It stands for Peace And Equality For All. That's the official name for our organization. Peacekeeper is a nickname the folks gave us, for some reason.

[*: Pronounced pey-fah.]

I was your typical bully back when I was still in school. I shoved people into their lockers, pushed my way to the front of the lunch line while laughing at those who didn't fight back, and made fun of people for their miseries. People were scared of me, and the empowerment made me feel good.

I know what my doc said about that. She said I acted that way because I was raised in a kind of "survival of the fittest" environment and that sort of bullshit. She told me not to be too harsh on myself for what's passed.

Don't listen to her. I fucked up, and there's no excuse for what I've done. I can never take those things back, and I can never mend the damages I did to some of those poor people.

There were always somebody following me in my path to destroy all the pride and confidence someone had. It made things worse when I looked back to those days. Not only did I make my targets' life miserable, but I'd also dragged my pals in that hell. Sometimes I'd stay awake in the night and think of the souls I condemned.

When I was at Beacon, there's this guy. Jaune Arc - yeah, that Jaune Arc, one of the heroes who ended the war. He was weak and an easy target. I had some of his dirt on my hands and used it to force him to do my biddings. He saved my ass and stood up to me. That's the first time I rethinked about my actions.

But what really changed my mind and made me go, "hey, asshole, that's a jerk move" happened much later, when I was on a mission with my boys on the countryside.

It was shortly after Atlas came and Goodwitch made that speech. My boys and I didn't go to the ceremony. We thought it's a waste of time to listen to her pep talk. We made it back to our homes and were quite comfortable there. As far as we were concerned, we were done with Beacon.

Well, we were dead wrong.

All the people we knew joined the army, or were doing something to help the war effort. Not just our classmates from Beacon. All other kids we'd gone to school with, and or just knew from some random places. Anyway, when you went to one of the most prestigious Huntsman school, people held a certain expectations from you.

Your families, your neighbors, even your neighbors' pets. Everybody who knew who you were expected you to fight. That's what got us. Russel showed up at my house one day with Dove and Sky, crying their hearts out as they told me they couldn't take the pressure anymore. The next day we went to the recruitment center and enlisted in the army. It was about ten months in the war.

It was a mistake. We weren't cut for that shit. As soon as we started the BTFNR [*] we knew we made a bad choice. We should have just ignored what people said and continued hiding like the cowards that we were.

[*: Basic Training For New Recruits.]

The training was hell. Following instructions and strict protocols wasn't exactly easy when you got so used to the freedom of doing whatever the fuck you want. When they told us that training was over and ordered us to report to our new unit, I thought the worst was over.

Boy was I wrong. It was only the beginning of a nightmare. We got assigned to Battalion 428, one of the special units that employed Huntsmen trainees.

["Why is that?"]

[He coughed out a few dry laughters.] There were too many people we knew from Beacon there. It was one of the roughest days of my life when Lieutenant Colonel Seymour greeted us at the entrance, with all the Huntsmen and trainees standing behind him.

["Did they blame you for not being there since the beginning?"]

What? No. Of course not. That's what made it even more unbearable.

I've got pride. All of my team did. It felt like shit walking down the hallway with the rest of them, knowing that we didn't earn the rights to fight alongside the heroes and heroines who didn't bat their eyelash when the world called for their services.

They should have got into our faces and just tell us, "you guys don't deserve to be called Huntsmen." But they didn't and it stunk. It stunk worse than all the Grimm we killed and the rotten corpses we didn't save.

We weren't happy after we settled down at our new home. Everyday, everything everyone did felt like a punishment, a reminder that we chickened out, that we turned our backs on the people we swore to protect. So we did our damn best to isolate ourselves from the rest of them.

It didn't matter if people tried talking to us or tried to get us to talk. We kept to ourselves and pretended they should be grateful we were there.

We were fine by ourselves thank you very much, and we prefer staying that way. Eventually, people grew tired of our attitudes and started ignoring us as well. They left us be, even actively avoided us. And you know what? It's beautiful. I loved it. We loved not being bothered by those who were worthy to be called heroes or heroines. We loved not having others trying to "understand" what we were going through. I think it was because we knew we really fucked up but just didn't want to face the reality…

It stayed like that for a while, but things changed when we got sent to Strawburg.

["Was that…?"]

Yeah. Mission 137, or more commonly known as the Strawburg Disaster.

It was supposed to be routine missions. Teams got divided up to help out different stuff. For example, CFVY had to eradicate the Grimm northeast of the village. Xiao Long got assigned to the area southeast. My team was supposed to escort some grade B cargo from the city to the village.

One of the teams in our battalion had to stay at Vale for operator training for the new communication system. I don't know if it would have made any difference had they been there. I don't think so. But whatever.

I complained all the way there. My boys humored me by agreeing to my snobby remarks. We bitched about the Schnee, saying all sorts of awful things about her wish to "rebuild the bridge between the two races", as she put it in her speech before the Black Blood fuckers interrupted the event. I still didn't trust Faunus. Or maybe, I just didn't trust myself.

When the escort mission was over, I let the boys go wherever they wanted, or more like "leave me the fuck alone". I took a walk because I was bored and agitated. Half of the villagers were Faunus, and I was not okay with that.

I stumbled upon a Human and a Faunus arguing on my walk. The first thing that came to my mind was, "I've gotta teach these animals a lesson". I thought I was doing humanity a favor by "getting the freaks to learn their places". Before I walked up to them, I already decided the Faunus must be a criminal.

I reported my name and my title. They both looked relieved. And then, they started explaining why they were having this dispute.

I wasn't really listening. If I was, I would have asked more questions, like what exactly was the problem and stuff like that. But I wasn't. I just nodded perfunctorily and waited until the Human finished.

I was about to say something to the Faunus when another voice cut in.

"What's going on?"

It was Xiao Long. She looked exhausted and bothered when she strolled past me and questioned both of the merchants.

They repeated whatever they told me before. I opened my mouth to give the verdict, but XIao Long shot me a hard look and I shut up.

She listened patiently to both sides and asked them plenty of questions. I wasn't listening. I was impatient to tell the Faunus to leave the Human merchant alone and beat it. The only thing stopping me was Xiao Long. I'm glad she was there.

After a while, she frowned and asked them more question.

"So, you -" she pointed to the Human, "should be paying him -" and she pointed to the Faunus "two stacks of good wood for the five pound of meat, right?"

The Human and the Faunus looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"She's right!" Cried the Human as he gestured for his apprentice to come forth. "For the love of Oum, I'm getting old!"

The Faunus man smiled when he handed over his prize - a doe - and accepted the materials. "I'm to blame, too. I kept thinking we were talking about something else."

The happy merchant and hunter thanked the both of us. It was then that I started feeling awkward because I realize it was just a misunderstanding.

Xiao Long smiled to both of them and refused the gifts they tried to stuff in our hands.

"No, no." She said and returned the goods. "You guys keep it. We've got everything taken care of by the army."

I scratched my head and mumbled something in agreement.

As the civilians walked away, Xiao Long turned to me.

"You ain't a bad man." She said. "I know why you're angry and all, but you can't let hatred blind you. We aren't fighting for just ourselves anymore." She looked into the distance. "...you've gotta let it go. We've got duties bigger than ourselves to fulfil and lives to save."

She turned back to me with something I couldn't decipher.

"Why did you go to Beacon?" She asked. "What's the reason you fight?"

I opened and closed my mouth like a fish that left that water. She saw it and dropped the topic.

"Just remember the people, or things, or places, that you treasure. Okay? Just remember what you fight for."

And then, she just turned and walked away.

Later that night, I saw her entering her room with a bottle of whiskey in her hand and an expression that made me gulp. I turned back to the room I shared with my team. They asked me what's the matter, but I didn't tell them.

Few days later, the Faunus showed up to our camp and asked to see me and Xiao Long.

She was due for another mission in half an hour. The Faunus looked disappointed - he wanted to invite us to his house for supper. I was cheering inwardly for Xiao Long's "untimely" appointment, when she suddenly whacked me on the back.

"Cardin will go." She volunteered my ass for the invitation. "He can be your guest and tell me all about it after I'm back."

I was going to protest, but she shot me another glance and I shut up again. The Faunus didn't notice our exchange, too excited, and ushered me to his wagon before I could find an excuse to bail.

He talked all the way during our ride. He told me his name was Sap, but didn't tell me what it's short of. I didn't ask and just nodded along. After we arrived, he introduced me to his wife, Lila, and his little girl, Odhran.

The supper was really nice. Hot stew, fresh bread, and homemade jam and sauce. I never had a better meal than that. Not before, not since.

I wouldn't admit to anyone until much later, but I did have fun that night. Sap broke a barrel of his finest ale and we drank and laughed like brothers who met after a long separation. By the time I arrived back at the camp, I was half in the bag. It's amazing really, the ale they brewed went down smooth as silk, but it hit hard like a charging Ursa.

I had this big, stupid grin on my face when I wandered through the tents, trying to find my way back to my team. A group of people walked past in front of me. My slurred mind didn't register them on time.

It was team CFVY.

Coco, Fox, and Yatsuhashi took one look at me, and rushed to stand between me and their last member, Velvet.

It's pretty obvious, even to my drunk ass, that they thought I was looking for trouble. For once, I wasn't. I even felt a bit awkward looking at her face and remembering how I picked on her every chance I got.

"What do you want?" Coco practically growled.

I was barely standing at that point. I slurred something. They looked at each other in confusion before Coco raised an eyebrow and took a step closer. She raised her handbag casually, like it wasn't also a deadly high-caliber minigun…

I was thinking "oh shit", but too drunk to move my ass out of the way. I don't think they were going to beat me up or anything like that, but a "talk" was definitely coming.

But then, out of nowhere, Velvet shot forward and locked her with her arms.

"No no no. Coco. Wait!" She cried desperately. "I'm sure he wasn't going to do anything!"

If Coco was surprised, I didn't see it. Well, it's pretty hard to decipher her emotion when she's wearing her shade I guess. Anyway, Coco gave her arms a little pat and signed. She whispered something to Velvet, and her face turned red.

Then, Coco looked back at me. "Well? Were you?"

I sobered up instantly from the undisguised threat and enmity in her voice. My Fight or Flight instinct kicked in. My mind went to battle mode. I was never taught how to back down, no matter how seriously outnumbered or outsourced.

Again, I was drunk and stupid. My brain couldn't come up with any kind of good idea to work with. Had I been a bit wiser that night, I'd know to just say "no, I wasn't looking for a fight" and leave them in peace.

But instead, I did what I do most when I want to intimidate people. I brought out the tough act.

"Get the fuck out of my way." I grumbled and reached out to push my way through. Coco dodged that pathetic shove easily and frowned.

I put too much force in the act, and the alcohol caught up with me at that precise moment. My body lost balance, and I tripped, falling forward.

Velvet tried to pull me back up. It didn't work. I dragged her down with me.

When you are trying to be all tough and mean, you don't like feeling stupid. When you make a fool out of yourself, even if you know there's only one person at fault, you blame it on the others.

Your face start burning up. Your heart race like you are running at full speed. The illogical part of your brain override any control the logical part has on your action and speech. And you do or say something that you'd regret later on.

"The hell are you doing?!" I shouted at her. "Watch where you are going, you stupid animal!"

Something snapped. And I don't mean just metaphorically.

I was confused at first as to why my world suddenly turned upside down. Before I realized I was sent flying backward like a golf ball, gravity pulled me back down and I hit the ground face-first.

The shock paralyzed me for several seconds. When I somehow struggled up, Fox was behind me with his tonfa pressed against my neck, and Yatsuhashi stuck his greatsword against my chest armor with enough force to bruise. Their expressions told me I had crossed the line.

But those were nothing compared to the overwhelming pressure I felt from Coco.

It was at the end of the year, just before spring arrives. The night can be a bit chilly, yeah, but I wasn't shivering because of the temperature. I couldn't see Coco's eyes behind her shades, but it didn't matter. I felt her cold, biting fury.

"You ignorant piece of shit." Her voice was low and steady, but the way she enunciated each word, the way her pitch shifted ever so slightly, and the way her muscles twitched… man, it was scary.

She walked forward in a slow pace, just slow enough so I can get a full view of her handbag being deployed into its minigun form. "You should not have done that."

My mind was blank. I stuttered out something. It must look pretty pathetic.

Coco snorted out a humorless laughter and pressed the barrel against my temple.

I found my voice again when I felt the cold metal. "Hey! Th-this ain't fair."

"Wow. You are dumber than you look, kid." She raised an eyebrow. "First of all, I don't care. Second, it seems very 'fair' considering how you treat other people. Last, I'm not going to hurt you, no matter how much I think you deserve it.

It was then that I noticed Velvet hanging on her arm, trying desperately to hold her back from blowing a hole in my brain. My jaw dropped, opening and closing like a fish out of water.

"My sweet easter bunny could beat the living daylight out of you and your goons, with her eyes closed and one hand tied to her back." She said. Velvet's face turned bright pink. "But she didn't. Do you know why?"

I shook my head. She didn't want my answer anyway.

"Because she's got a bigger heart than all of us combined." She signed and pointed the barrel of her minigun away from my forehead reluctantly. There was a hint of pride and helpless admiration in her tone. "I'll let your sorry ass off the hook this time."

She nodded to the male members of her team, and they reluctantly withdrew their weapons. Everyone except Velvet stared at me with this expression… like they expect me to - or even hope me to - pick a fight.

I didn't.

I backed the fuck off.

My dad and his teaching can go to hell. I ain't gonna stand up if they told me to stay down. I was done with being the "tough boss man" that night.

I only noticed that Velvet had been trying hysterically to pull Coco away. When we locked eyes, she gave me this weak, apologetic smile, like she was sorry for what her team did. I felt a mixture of confusion, annoyance, and shame. I got up. Coco frowned at me and raised her minigun again.

"Listen closely. I will say this once, and only once." She loomed over and stared down at me.

"Don't you fucking dare harassing Velvet again, ever. My easter bunny is too nice for her own good, but I'm not." She warned me with a click of her safety.

"She may still think you boys are good people despite all the shits you threw at her, but I don't. I will be looking forward to the day when you boys fuck up bad enough that I can give you a piece of my mind without her objection."

And just like that, she stood back and let me go. I scrambled away, running as fast as my tired legs would carry me.

Russell tried to ask me what happened, but I didn't breathe a word.

[He fell silent and looked out of the window. I nodded, thinking that's the end of the story. He noticed my intention to leave, and moved to pour more tea into my cup. I realized there was more.]

Coco was right. Velvet could have beaten the shit out of me and my boys whenever she wanted. She's a better fighter than any of us by a long shot. Everybody on team CFVY were top-notch warriors.

That's why they were assigned to go after the class A after the GISP [*] guys found it. And that's why my team was given the easy job - to defend the villagers.

[*: GISP stands for Grimm Intelligence and Strategy Planning. It's typical for a battalion with Huntsmen to have a team of specialists to study their enemy and formulate the best tactic to eradicate the threat.]

After the war broke out and Grimm population grew, we began to learn more about the creatures of darkness. There was a loose classification system in the pre-war era. We even learned it in the Grimm Study class. But it was only after two years into the war that we really began classifying them.

Class D were the most common ones. Anyone who graduated from a battle school could take them on. Class C were a bit tougher, and freshmen in the Huntsmen academy usually need to work together to bring them down. Class B should be only be handled by groups of senior students, or can be soloed by certified Huntsmen.

Class A, however, were much more dangerous. They could pose significant threat, even to seasoned Huntsmen. They are intelligent, ferocious, and some alphas even possess the ability to command other lower class Grimm.

As for Class S… well, I'll just give you an example of a Class S. Remember that Grimm that destroyed the Beacon CCT tower? [I nodded.] Yeah, that's a class S. It took a troop of Huntsmen to completely kill it. And that one wasn't even the strongest recorded in our history… [he shook his head.]

Anyway. Class A was a significant threat. I know I said they should only be handled by seasoned Huntsmen, preferably a group of them, but we didn't exactly have that available at the time they showed up.

So Lieutenant Colonel Seymour made the call of sending our best team out. I don't know if he considered about the possibility that CFVY wouldn't make it. If that's the case, we were all doomed. Maybe he did, and that's precisely why he sent them on that mission.

In any case. My boys and I were secretly freaking out when we patrolled the neighborhood. There was a lot of hushed whispers about ditching and make a run of it.

I wasn't paying attention. I was still thinking about CFVY and about what we were going to do if things went to hell. I had a responsibility to my teammates. I needed to make sure they were taken care of, and most important of all, I've gotta keep them alive until we could go home.

I didn't realize we were getting close to Sap's house. All of the sudden I heard someone calling my name.

The boys were all staring at something… or someone. I followed their gazes, and froze. Odhran was hopping toward us with a broad smile.

"Hey Cardin…" I heard Russell say, his voice strange and slow. "Who's that?"

Man was it awkward. I didn't want to explain what's been going on for the past few days, nor did I want to tell them about my slight alternation in my opinions regarding the Faunus. I tried to ignore Odhran and walk away, but another voice called out. It was Sap.

He ran up to me and greeted us. I didn't want to look at any of my teammates, afraid I'd see something I don't like on their faces. I just kept walking.

The ground beneath us collapsed just as Sap was asking me if everything's alright. All I can remember after that was falling down, faster and faster into the endless abyss awaiting for us below, and of Odhran's little face.

[He paused and sipped his tea, his eyes staring into the far distant. I could hear soft chatters and laughters coming from the outside.]

When I woke up, I had no idea where I was or what had happened. I began to panic and shouted, calling out to my team, to Sap and his daughter, to anyone.

But nobody came.

I don't know how long had past, but eventually I got a grip of myself. The training came back to me and I soldiered on.

It was one of the scariest experience in my life. I couldn't see anything, hear anything, or even feel anything. It was like being trapped in a void. Time and space lost meaning… you lose track of how far you have moved, how many times you have inhaled and exhaled, and even who you are. Memory and illusions fuse together.

I don't remember how I found the exit, but I remember stumbling into the light, and a sense of peace.

Yatsuhashi found me. I didn't exactly see him approach, but I did feel him shaking my shoulder lightly. He looked oddly gentle when he kneeled besides me and tapped my shoulder.

"Here, let me carry her." He said quietly.

I just stared at him. What is he talking about? I thought to myself. What's going on? What happened? How did he get here? Where's everybody?

He mistook my inaction as something else, probably reluctance or mistrust. We never spoke of that day, so I never got the chance to ask. He moved closer and reached out for something. Something in my arms.

Naturally, I looked down.

… they asked me about it more times than I care to count. The commander, the Grimm specialists, the medics, and eventually the shrink. My answer never changed.

I was alone when I woke up after the fall. I didn't encounter anybody when I stumbled through the darkness. If there was someone else with me, I would have known.

When I looked down, I suddenly became aware of my surrounding again, like someone just flipped the switch to my sensory system. I smelled the burnt ashes in the air, felt the cramps in my muscles, heard the distant sirens and gunfires.

A little bundle appeared in my arms. Out of nowhere. A moment before she wasn't there, but a moment later there she was.

["But the report said…"]

I'm perfectly aware of what the report said. No offense. But it's impossible. Like I said, if she fell to the same place as I after the Class A collapsed half of the village, if we had spent a week underground searching for a way up, if I had been carrying her body through the ruins for more than three days, I would have known.

I would have. Right?