A little side arc that I had in my head for a while but never thought would take off. Trying to keep it a short and sweet two-parter. If you can guess why I named the title as such, you win a free cake! Or something. Haven't really worked that out yet~

Disclaimer

Adventure Time isn't mine. Thanks for reminding me.

Jasso and Ice Queen stood apart from each other in an arena deep within the Ice Castle, glaring each other down with determined looks on their faces. Gina, as well as a few other penguins sat up on nearby bleachers, a few munching on popcorn, and some even eating hot dogs. Where they had gotten them, neither royal knew.

"Sure you're ready for this?" smirked Ice Queen, getting into a battle stance. Her blue-white eyes blazed with intensity, and she seemed to radiate a battle aura that could burn through the stratosphere.

"I was born ready." was the prince's reply, folding his hands one on top of the other a few inches in front of his chest.

"Then bring it! Stars of Frozen Rain!" Faster than the eye could track, Ice Queen made a quick series of hand seals, a Chinese star of ice appearing in-between the spaces of her fingers. With a battle cry, she thrust out her hands, the stars screaming towards the Thunder Prince.

"Fenrir Fists!" hollered Jasso, running throw his own set of seals. Ice formed over his fingers and in seconds, he had created claws of ice, each about six inches long.

Letting out a quick breath, he swung his hands as hard and fast as he could, shredding apart the Stars of Frozen Rain seconds before they reached him.

"Nice," remarked Ice Queen, readying her hands for another technique. "But you'll have to do better than that!" With that, she leapt into the air, her hands a blur. "Roar of the North Wind!"

She held her hands out in an X-formation and swung them, two crescent-moon shaped waves of ice hurtling at Jasso.

"Oh, Thunders." Thinking quickly, Jasso jumped back, forming his own seals. "Mirror Mirror On the Ice!"

The Thunder Demon slammed his hands on the ground, a massive mirror of ice bursting in front of him. The Roar of the North Wind attack flew into the mirror, absorbing it completely. A flash of light, and the attack burst from the mirror, flying at Ice Queen at twice the speed, twice the size and twice the power.

"Not bad, honey." she said, raising a hand. "Snow More!" Forming a seal, her eyes flashed blue, and the Roar of the North Wind disappeared in a flurry of snowflakes.

Jasso gaped openmouthed as Ice Queen landed gracefully with a spin, bowing to the applause of her penguins. "How...how did you DO that?!"

"I'm a Fridjitzu Master, silly." giggled Ice Queen. "I know tricks you can't even imagine."

"Really?" replied Jasso, smirking and readying a seal. "Even...Yeti's Hammer?!"

"Northern Tower." said Ice Queen coolly, raising a hand. From her fingertips burst a beam of pure ice energy, blowing apart the massive cube of ice that was bearing down on her head.

Ice Queen smirked and put her hands on her hips, smiling at Jasso's shocked expression. "Got anything else?"

Jasso desperately turned to Gina, who shrugged in response. "Wenk, wenk."

"Well," said the prince, grinning. "I have one trick left."

"I'd love to see what you've got up your slee-"

In a flash of lightning, Jasso had zoomed across the arena, pinning Ice Queen to the wall. At her shocked glare, he merely smirked.

"You brat! You cheated! You promised you'd only use Fridjitsu!"

A quick kiss on the nose silenced her, making her blush. "All's fair in love and war, Ice Queen."

The ice witch playfully punched the Thunder Demon on the arm when he released her, a smile on her face. "Dork."

"Yes, but I'm YOUR dork." was Jasso's reply, nuzzling his queen's neck and purring.

"Wenk, wenk w-wenk wenk wenk!" cried Gina, making gagging noises and pretending to stick a flipper down her throat.

"If you don't like it, the door's right over there!" snapped Ice Queen, hugging Jasso close.

A loud beeping sound made Jasso flinch. Reaching into his pocket for his phone, he flipped it open. "Message from Ukit." he said, answering Ice Queen's stare. "Hmm...hmm...oh...oh, my Gob!"

"What's wrong?!" cried Ice Queen.

"Um, well...there's something important I forgot to get together and Ukit's pretty mad."

Ice Queen raised an eyebrow. "Then why isn't he calling you?"

"He...haha...he gets pretty belligerent when he's mad and on the phone at the same time."

"So what's so important?" asked the sorceress, walking up the stairs to the main floor, Jasso following.

"It's nothing that important, it's just regarding the dodgeball tournament next week."

Ice Queen froze. "Dodgeball?"

"Yeah." said Jasso dismissively, making his way to the Ice Queen's recliner. "It's this tradition thing that dates back to when the Thunder Kingdom was just a village."

"Wenk wenk?" said Gina, coming up from the basement, drinking a slushie.

"What, you wanna hear the story?" cooed Jasso, picking up the penguin.

"Wenk." she shrugged, taking another sip.

"Okay, then. A long time ago, when the Thunder Kingdom wasn't even a kingdom, dodgeball was a great part of settling debates. Whether it was about property, honor or just for fun, dodgeball was the go-to way to fix anything."

"But why dodgeball?" asked Ice Queen, rummaging through the fridge for a snack.

"When you can move at the speed of lightning and blast holes through sheetrock with the snap of your fingers, you have to find sports that require less contact."

"True."

"Now, then," continued Jasso. "Legend dictates that one day, an argument broke out amongst the entirety of the nation. No one can remember what it was about, but supposedly, it was HUGE."

"The elders were unanimous; a massive dodgeball tournament was to be scheduled, to determine who was right and who was wrong. The match reportedly lasted days; so long, in fact, everyone forgot what they were fighting about. From there was born the Gauntlet of Jupiter."

Ice Queen raised an eyebrow. "Gauntlet of Jupiter?"

"We're not that good with names." chuckled Jasso. "Anyway, we hold the tournament every year, and I totally forgot about it until now. I've got around a week to set everything up."

"Will you be okay?" asked Ice Queen, pulling out a pudding pack. "Yeah, I should be able to get everything together. But my current generation isn't exactly a dodgeball A-list."

Ice Queen rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "Well...why not ask the others?"

"...Not a bad idea." murmured Jasso thoughtfully. "But you think they'll go for it?"

"Are you KIDDING?!" shrieked Fionna, shaking the terrified Jasso by the shoulders. "I LOVE dodgeball!"

"When's the tourney?!" squealed Cake, bouncing up and down.

"N-n-n-n-n-next week!"

"We'll be there, we'll be there!"

Marceline looked up from her bass, a bemused look on her face. "Dodgeball? Really?"

"Yeah." shrugged Jasso. "Interested?"

"What color are the balls?"

"...Red?"

"Alright, I'll go."

"Pigu? Geu jaemi deulli neyo... Jeikeugadoemyeon naega galgeyo." (1)

Jasso stared at Lady Rainicorn, a single bead of nervous sweat rolling down his brow.

"Eum ... geogjeonghaji masibsio. Naneun jeikeuege mul-eo geoya, geuligo nan geuga geulaessdago hal geobnida." (2)

"Meosjin! Naega sikineundaelo allyeojusibsio. Da-eumju yeonju gidalil su eobs-eo!" (3)

Jasso bowed and turned, making sure to cover his nose to hide the blood that was dribbling down his nose. A fun little trick that experienced Thunder Demons could do; by manipulating the electricity within themselves, they were capable of incredible feats, from bolstering their endurance to the typical skill of moving at the speed of lightning. A lesser-known skill was, by zapping their own brains the tiniest bit, they could increase their intelligence level exponentially. In doing so, for this shining moment, Jasso was able to converse with Lady.

But GOB, it hurt...

"Dodgeball?" exclaimed Princess Bubblegum. "But that's so...barbaric!"

Jasso shrugged. "If you don't wanna go, I won't stop you."

"I never said I wouldn't go."

"But...you JUST said it was barbaric."

Bubblegum rolled her eyes and smiled. "That doesn't mean it's not fuuuuuun..."

"Is Bubblegum going?"

"Yeah, sure."

Prince Gumball smiled evilly, pushing up his safety goggles in a way that the light shined off them dramatically. "I'll be there."

"Like, dodgeball?" asked LSP, raising an eyebrow. "What's that?"

Jasso's jaw dropped. "You've NEVER heard of dodgeball? Have you been living under a rock?"

The princess frowned and gestured widely with her hand the campsite around she and her fellow royal.

"Oh. Sorry, wrong choice of words."

As efficiently and clearly as he could, Jasso explained, in great detail, the honor, spirit and glory of dodgeball.

"Hmm..." said LSP, rubbing her chin. "Are there gonna be prizes?"

"...Sure?"

"Then I'm in."

Ukit lowered his book, giving his liege a frown. "No."

"But Ukit..."

"Prince Jasso, you ask me EVERY year if I want to go and EVERY year I give the same response: no." The Bearwula wrinkled his nose. "I have far better ways of spending my time that engaging in that childish bloodfest you call a sport."

"But it's fun! I've seen you come out to watch me play!"

"I watch you to make sure no one tries to KILL you, sire."

"That assassination attempt was proven false!"

"There was C4 in the ball."

"WET C4!"

Ukit growled, anxious to get back to his reading. "Why are you trying so hard this year?"

Jasso, deciding to put on some charm, did a soft pout and widened his eyes. "Because this time I have actual friends, Ukit. Last year I didn't know PB and PG and Finn and Jake and Marshall Lee and Marceline and I didn't have Ice Queen and-"

"Alright, alright!" said Ukit, raising a paw for silence. "I'll go."

Face instantly retuning to normal, Jasso jumped up in the air, a big smile on his face. "WHOO-"

"But JUST this year."

"...Hoo."

Evening was falling, and Jasso found himself at Finn's house, asking the group of Finn, Jake, Marshall Lee and BMO to the game. Marshall Lee was milling about the kitchen, making himself a sandwich while Finn and Jake were busy playing a game on BMO. Jasso had figured that Finn, being such a gung-ho adventurer, would be all for it.

He was, surprisingly wrong.

"What do you mean you don't wanna go?!" exclaimed Jasso, eyes bugging out at Finn's refusal.

"Like I said, man, dodgeball's not really my thing." Finn paused in his speech, entering an extremely complicated command into BMO to pull off a sweet combo move. "It's kinda silly when you think about it; people throwing balls in each other's faces."

"You don't complain when we do that." muttered Lee under his breath, though not low enough for everyone to avoid hearing it. He smirked as he dodged the thrown couch cushion from a furiously blushing Finn.

"Okay, see, THAT'S what I'm talking about!" said Jasso, taking the lemon Marshall offered him. "You've got a GREAT arm!"

"Don't I know it." grinned Lee, not even bothering to keep his voice down on that last comment.

"Lee, don't think I can't kill you just 'cuz I'm playing a game."

Jasso huffed, peeling the lemon and taking a bite from it. The citric acid revitalized him; a welcome snack that recharged him from all the running around he had been doing across Ooo. Finn was a good friend, and he REALLY wanted him to attend the tournament. But he, for whatever reason, wouldn't go. BMO was. Jake was. Even Marshall Lee was, if only to mess with Prince Gumball and drain a few of the balls-DODGEBALLS!

This left the prince with one option.

Jasso, allowing himself a sly grin, shrugging, slowly making his way to the door. "Well, if you don't want to go, that's your choice, Finn."

Finn smiled. "Thanks, dude."

"I mean, different strokes for different folks, right?"

"Exactly right, dude!"

"And I'm sure you'd go even if you weren't scared of losing."

"Glad you're so understanding-WHAT."

Beep went the sound of the game pausing as Finn turned to glare at Jasso, who had one foot out the door.

"Hm? Did I say something?" asked the Thunder Prince innocently.

"WHAT did you just say?"

"Oh, this is gonna be GOOD." whispered Lee, floating next to an equally anxious Jake. BMO put the game into sleep mode, an eager look on his face as he watched the show.

"Hey, it's cool if you are." said Jasso, milking the situation for all it was worth. "I mean, I'd be afraid to fight everyone, too. Especially Fionna."

Finn's face flashed pink in embarrassment, BMO letting out a low 'Ooooooooh' as Jake held back laughter.

"You think I'm scared of Fionna?"

"Well, not just her. There's Marcie, Ice Queen...LSP."

"I'm not scared of anyone or ANYTHING!" yelled Finn, embarrassment quickly shifting into anger. "I'll be there, and I'll kick everyone's butts! You'll see!"

Jasso raised an eyebrow, though on the inside he was laughing his ass off. "Are you sure? I mean, you said yourself a few minutes ago that dodgeball wasn't your thing..."

"Yeah, well next week, I'll show you. AND Fionna."

"Well, alright then." said Jasso, waving goodbye. "See you all next week." And with that, he left, making his way back to the Ice Castle, his reverse psychology having gone off without a hitch.

"Works...every...time~"

(1) Dodgeball? I'm not entirely sure. I'll go if Jake goes.

(2) Um...don't worry. I'll ask Jake and I'm sure he'll say yes.

(3) Wonderful! Let me know what he says. Can't wait to play next week!

I cannot speak a lick of Korean (outside from the lyrics of Genie Tell Me Your Wish and Run Devil Run, both of which are HUGE stretches), but I wanted to have a one-on-one convo with Jasso and Lady Rainicorn that would lay some foundation for more interactions with them in the future. So I used the Google translator. Which more than likely butchered it with its GD transliterations. Either way, enjoy this prelude to rubber-balled hell~^^