12

Kendall put the phone back in his pocket walked to his car with a heavy heart. He had been walking around to pass time, not knowing where to go, when he got the phone call from James. As much as he wanted to be with Elie and ask her all the questions he wanted to ask the entire year that she'd been gone, he knew he couldn't bear another hour of cool detachment that Elie had been showing him.

Can't really blame her, he thought. He started his car and started driving home.

When he got home, he found his family at the dining table, having what looks like a late lunch. He sat down at his place at the table, while his mom served him food.

"Tough day?" Kevin asked. Kendall didn't reply. He seemed lost in thought. Kevin looked at his parents with a puzzled expression.

Kathy put her hand on Kendall's shoulder and asked, "Is everything alright, honey?"

"I saw Elie today," was all Kendall said. Needless to say, that was a surprise to the family.

"So how did it go?" Kathy asked.

Kendall shrugged and shook his head. "We didn't really get to talk. She was the artist for the next album's cover, so she presented concepts and… I don't know, that's about it for us."

"Was she sad, mad, or glad?" asked Kevin. Kendall just shook his head as he pushed his food around his plate with his fork. And then he stood up.

"I'm sorry, Mom, Dad, Kevin. I just need to take some time alone," and with that, he got out of the dining room and went straight to his room. He didn't even bother changing into more comfortable clothing or taking off his shoes. He plopped into bed and suddenly remembered the times when he and Elie would lay down in bed and talk until sleep came to them, and how he would sometimes wake up first and look at Elie sleeping soundly beside him and wonder he ever became so lucky.

His reverie was broken when his phone rang. It was Logan. "Hello?"

"We'll be at your house in 2 minutes," Logan said and hung up.

"What? Hello? Fucking hell," Kendall muttered. What are they up to now?

True enough, he heard the doorbell ring after two minutes and he heard his bandmates' voices from downstairs. Soon they invaded his room.

"Dude," Carlos said as he sat down by the edge of the bed, "why weren't you at lunch today? We were hoping you'd be there."

"Elie wouldn't want me there," Kendall replied.

"How can you be so sure?" James asked this time.

"C'mon guys, let's not do this," Kendall said, exasperated.

"That's it? You're giving up on Elie?" James pressed on.

"She doesn't want me around anymore," Kendall replied.

"You don't know shit," James said back.

"You don't know shit either," Kendall retorted.

James was starting to get pissed, so before he could say anything else that would escalate things, Logan stepped in.

"What James was trying to say was we got to talk to Elie during lunch and we thought… perhaps… there's still something there? Like dude, don't pretend you don't love her still," said Logan.

"And we asked her if she was still in love with you, and she said that she was tries not to be," James added.

Kendall had a confused look on his face.

"Which means, Kendall, Elie still loves you. Something's stopping her – and stopping you for that matter – to get back together," Logan went on.

"And that something is called London. Guys, she's there, I'm here. That's another set of problems to the current set of problems that we already have," Kendall countered.

"What is wrong with you, Kendall Francis Schmidt?" James raised his arms, shook his head, and started walking towards the window.

"WHY IS THIS ON ME? SHE'S THE ONE WHO LEFT, REMEMBER? SHE DISAPPEARED!" Kendall's voice was getting louder.

"She heard you on the bus, Kendall," James said from across the room.

"What?" Kendall was more confused than ever.

"Remember your last fight? We were in Boston and she flew out to see you?" James reminded Kendall. "And then you had this fight that got serious and really awful all of a sudden and you said things to one another that you probably didn't mean."

Kendall remembers. How can he forget?

James went on, "And you were ranting on the bus a few hours after. I was there, and apparently she was also there because she basically recited what you said to me then, when you said –"

"—that I did not need her and good riddance, now I can concentrate on important stuff," Kendall finished James' sentence. His heart dropped. That wasn't true, he thought. I need Elie. I want her. And absolutely nothing is more important than her.

"How can I let this happen?" Kendall whispered. "You know that's not true, right?"

"She also believes that she's never going to be your priority. She's under the impression that you don't really need her," Carlos said.

Kendall shook his head. He felt sad, and then he felt a bit angry. "She left. She left without even allowing me to explain or to apologize or to…" he was pacing back and forth.

Logan stepped forward and handed Kendall a card with Elie's hotel address. "Do what you need to do, Kendall."

"But what do I need to do?" Kendall said, taking the card and putting it in his shirt pocket.

"Do you want to be with her or not?" Logan asked.

"But what if she doesn't want me anymore?" Kendall asked.

"Then at least you've said your piece and you can move on! It's really difficult watching you the past year have a really bad time about this. Just go and work things out or let go," Carlos told Kendall.

"She goes back to London tonight. Her flight's at around 8:30. If you need us to take you to her, let's go. We dropped her off at the hotel a few minutes ago, so she should be there, resting or packing or whatever," James said.

"I think I'll have to do this alone, but thank you guys. Thank you," Kendall said as he hugged each of his friends and got out of his room. He then got his car keys and started driving back to LA.

"Elie still loves me and God knows I really still love her," he said to himself, psyching himself up. But as he got nearer and nearer downtown LA, and especially when he got nearer and nearer the hotel, his heart started beating fast and his hands started to get clammy.

He pulled over the hotel driveway and let the valet take the car from him, and Kendall sprinted to the concierge. He gave Elie's name but when the concierge went to check, he told Kendall that Elie had checked out. Kendall's face fell and he looked like he was on the verge of crying. Mr. Concierge Dude must have taken pity on Kendall because he suddenly said, "But I believe she's sitting right there by the lobby, reading a book." He pointed Kendall towards where Elie was. True enough, hElie was deep into her reading and her suitcase was on the floor beside her.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," Kendall told the concierge. He took a deep breath and started walking towards Elie. Elie still hasn't looked up from her book or noticed anything was going on.

Before he reached Elie though, a hotel employee went to Elie and told her something, and proceeded to get her suitcase. Elie, in turn, started gathering her things and stood up. It was time to go to the airport. Kendall was in a panic. He sprinted to catch up with Elie, who was a mere 5 yards or so from the hotel door.

He then went in front of Elie to block her way, and only then did she notice Kendall. Needless to say, she was surprised.

"Elie, I need to talk to you," Kendall said. He didn't notice he was holding Elie's arm until Elie looked down at them. He removed his grip and immediately felt awkward afterward.

"Kendall, I have to go or I'm going to be late for my flight," Elie told Kendall.

"Please stay one more night. I'll pay for rebooking and your hotel and everything," Kendall pleaded.

Elie shook her head. "I really have to go. I'm sorry," she said as she walked past Kendall. Kendall caught up to her again and said, "Elie, please."

"My boss is waiting in the car. It's embarrassing to keep him waiting there. You are jeopardizing my job. What do you want me to do? Dedicate my life to you? I think I've done enough of that," Elie hissed. She regretted it as soon as she said it. She held her head down and quickly walked to the car that will take her to the airport.

Kendall was stunned at what Elie said. He didn't quite expect that from her, especially after what Logan, James, and Carlos had said. Were they lying? Was Elie lying? Either way, he still wanted to talk.

"So what was that about?" Stan asked Elie as she entered the car.

"Nothing," Elie replied.

"So what is it you're not telling me? I figured you and this Kendall person had a thing?" Stan pressed on.

Elie looked out the window, puffed her cheeks, sighed loudly and said, "Kendall is Kieran's dad."

Stan's mouth dropped open and he let out a "Oooooooooh. Go on, go on."

"And he doesn't know that Kieran exists," Elie said.

Stan's eyes widened. "I am gobsmacked. That's made-for-telly stuff right there. No wonder you're avoiding him. Bad breakup? What did he do?"

"It's a long story, Stan," Elie replied.

"We're looking at a 10-hour flight here, plus the 2 hours we'll be waiting at the airport," Stan chided. "That's 12 hours of story time."

Stan had been a great mentor to Elie and she was grateful for everything Stan had done for her, including hiring her and letting her stay on even though she had to take time off to give birth.

"Do you really want to hear it? It's really boring," Elie told Stan.

"Try me."

And so Elie proceeded to tell the Kendall and Elie story, starting from the time they met until what transpired earlier in the lobby. It went faster than she expected, and she finished the story before they even got to the ramp going to the LAX.

"That wasn't very long," Stan said.

"I know, but all my questions or your questions or everything I want to talk over – that should take a good chunk of the flight time," Elie said as the car pulled over to their gate.

"I'll buy you booze on the flight so you can tell me everything," Stan winked and got out of the car.

They had time to kill before boarding, so Stan went to the lounge and Elie decided to wander around the airport. She didn't think Kendall would follow her into the airport. She bought a couple of magazines and a coffee, and seated herself at a table near a speaker so she can hear if her flight's boarding already. It won't be for a couple of hours so there's no need to worry.

She was deep into that month's Computer Arts magazine when someone asked her if the seat in front of her was free. She looked up to say that nobody was sitting there and that he can go ahead and sit there if he wants. Turns out, it was Kendall.

"What now, Kendall?" Elie said as she closed her magazine. She was about to stand when Kendall stopped her.

"Can you please stop running away from me for just one second, Elie?" Kendall said. Elie leaned back on her seat, folded her arms over her chest, and looked away. Kendall went on, "I just want to talk to you." We used to be able to talk about everything. What happened to us? Kendall added, but only in his head.

"What do you want to talk about?" Elie asked.

"About us," Kendall said, looking intently at Elie.

Elie let out a sigh and looked at Kendall. "Go on then."

Kendall took a deep breath. There was quite a long pause before he went on. "I… really don't know where to start. There are many things I want to tell you. I want to ask you why you left without even saying anything. Elie, why did you leave? I'm sorry for what you heard. I hope you know I did not mean it, not in the slightest. Elie, you are the most important thing in my life. I'm sorry if I made you feel anything less than important. I miss you." His voice was breaking. While he was saying these things, Elie had her head down, fidgeting with her ring.

Kendall composed himself before he continued.

"You mean everything to me and I love you. I love you. I. Love. You. I don't know how many times I have to say it until you believe me again, and I'll keep telling you that until you do. I love you. I don't know if you still feel the same way after all this time, and this might be the weirdest place to ask you this but I hope you still feel the same about me. I mean… I hope we can give us another try." Kendall just went for it.

Elie was still looking down at her hands, her brows furrowed. Kendall looked at her with hope in his heart, wish for at least some chance with her again.

"A lot of things have changed since last year, Kendall," she finally said. She slowly shook her head. "And I don't think anything's the same."

BA 282 bound for London is now boarding at Gate B.

Elie looked up to see if she heard right.

BA 282 bound for London is now boarding at Gate B.

"I'm sorry, I have to go," she said as she slowly eased out of her seat.

"Elie," Kendall said, barely audible.

Before she walked away, Elie put her hand on Kendall's shoulder and said, "Take care of yourself, Kendall."

Kendall sat for a long time following Elie's departure. He started wandering aimlessly around LAX, just trying to soak it in. He doesn't know what to think, really. Is this the closure he was looking for? He has told himself time and again that he wanted closure, that he wanted to know for sure that him and Elie were over and done with so that he can move on. It would seem that they were, but Kendall realized something which made him stop in his tracks.

"She didn't say no," Kendall thought aloud. "She didn't say no!" He said it loud enough for the passing people to look back at him with puzzled looks on their faces.

He got his phone from his pocket and called his brother Kevin. "Kevin, can you bring my passport to LAX. I'm going to London."

….

First off, sorry for the looooooooong absence. I really had no idea what to do with Elie and Kendall when I finished the last chapter. I spent a long time staring into nothingness and then one day, I just started typing. Forgive the typos. I will go back later and edit those. I just want to get this out there. Hope you like

Second, good thing I already know what will happen next so what's left for me to do is to write.

xx

E