He had been there for two months. But 'in due time' was two weeks from then. Two weeks of..nothing. They didn't run any more tests on the Palm tree-faced teen, they didn't abuse him or rough him up, there was really nothing to be said about what they did- or rather, didn't- do. It was dreadfully boring for the poor boy, to be honest. All he did was sit around all day and wait. Yeah, they gave him food. And yes, they did allow him out to walk around the building. Provided, of course, he was tailed by two burly guards, both outfitted with those horrid dart-guns and stunning guns. Envy frowned, this was not a good deal on his part. Where the hell was he going? He didn't know. He just needed to get out of that room.
Glancing around at his surroundings, he began to carefully map out his surroundings. The signs, the pattern of doors, broken lights, the tiling, where the restrooms, dining hall, and other cells were. He discovered and charted everything he could with his photographic memory- smirking a bit to himself. If that stupid Flaming Pony didn't come back for him as he said, then he could escape himself. That had been the only thing really holding him back. If he had run away before now, he would never know where to go. And then, he would probably get captured when he was trapped in this damn white building. And that. Would. Suck. So much.
So now he had a backup plan. As they walked him around the Institution, Envy thought angrily while piecing together his plot. Why the hell was it that Roy guy and not Edward? Where the hell WAS said Golden-haired midget? Could Edward possibly have forgotten him and their..ministrations...and moved on? To a GIRL? Envy sniffed in distaste at that last thought, why would Edward do something like that? Not that he cared..Of course. Envy was a hardened sin! He had better things to do all day then mope around thinking about some blonde-haired egotistical, uncaring, selfish, stubborn..Nice...cute...funny..Determined...NO! He smacked his ear, tilting his head to the side and continuing, as if that would make all those STUPID thoughts go away, much to the curiosity of the guards watching him. They began whispering faintly to one another and Envy turned to them, "What IS it, you brutes? I can ruddy hear you!" he snapped furiously.
They shut up.
Envy snickered and continued down the path, "Have you heard anything from the Pony- Er, the Colonel..Guy...thing?" Envy waved a hand as if to dust off some non-important detail he hadn't the mind to remember. The guards looked from one another, wondering if they should answer him. "Well?" demanded Envy, spinning around once more and placing his hands on his hips darkly, "Can't you do anything rather then grunt to one another about me, eat, shit, and use those stupid little GUNS?"And with that, said brutes frowned deeply and took out said guns. Envy stiffened, "Oi! I didn't attack you or anything, unless I hurt your pathetic human feelings." Envy sneered. Then, the guards stopped, putting the guns down and straightening up. "Well!" Envy said, smirking as he, too, straightened, "That's more like it! Finally, you're beginning to realize I could and would kill you in a second! Finally," he continued, turning on his heel and beginning to walk forward, "some well-deserved respect–OOMPH!" he crashed to the floor, landing on his little rear end.
"What the HELL is your ruddy little problem you dirty, nasty.." Envy rubbed his head through his brackish-colored locks as he looked up darkly with violet eyes. Then he stopped, "..Er.." he muttered and stood hastily, "What're YOU doing here!" he snapped.
"And here I thought you would be happy to see me." said the new man, readjusting his rectangle-shaped glasses, "Roy couldn't make it down here. He got sick. So, he sent me." the man looked down at Envy who was currently giving him a glare that would make any hardened solider pee his pants. But this man was not a hardened solider, and this man had seen worse things then a scantily-clad teenager glaring daggers at him. Though he was vaguely surprised he wasn't impaled yet. "Long time not see..Envy." he finished after a moment hesitation.
Envy was on his feet in five seconds flat, "Why the hell would that bastard send you, probably the biggest bastard in the WORLD, in his place? Why not just send that moronic little blonde boy?" Envy sniffed and crossed his arms, "Oh, right, you probably don't want him hurt by the mean little sin. After all, he is your little favorite, isn't he?" Envy said spitefully, his nails digging into his bicep where his hands were placed. His knuckles went white from the amount of pressure he was putting on his hands.
The man pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and groaned a bit, "Could we talk after I get you on the road?" he asked impatiently, his narrow, gold eyes, glancing at the guards who listened carefully, ready to report anything suspicious. "There are some serious matters I would rather discuss with you in private, while I'm sure you have questions for me."
Envy fumed and closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. He'd be damned if this jackass actually helped him for once. Haha..though he already sorta is damned..But that's a mere technicality. Anyway. The point was, this guy didn't help Envy. No, this guy hated, feared, and was disgusted with the very thought of Envy or anything relating to Envy. In fact- the violet-eyed teen would most likely bet everything he could ever steal that this particular man's least-favorite color happened to be green. And his least favorite animal? A snake. Envy snorted a bit to himself, though continued glowering at the man. Who was said man, you wonder? Well, it's obvious.
None other than Hohenheim of Light himself. Come to whisk his eldest son away from this mean little place where they would put him in a white room and then loud him up on drugs and do tests on him! It only took him about two months to get there, and only after Roy had come! Gee, thanks, dad. Envy sneered a bit as he watched Hohenheim go through the process of validating who he was, why he was there, and what would become of Envy. This particular sin hated it when people talked over him like he wasn't there. Or, worse, treated him like something that could fend, kill, and destroy by himself. He snarled a bit to himself and scoffed at the thought of being so dependent on others. Who the hell did they think they were, running his life? Acting as if he couldn't handle himself? Dammit, he was 400 years old! If that wasn't old enough, what the hell WAS? He'd have to be around since the fucking dinosaurs to get any god damned RESPECT around here.
As Envy silently fumed, Hohenheim and the guards dragged him around, gaining clearance and eventually they were out. Out side. In the day. Envy inhaled the fresh- not really- air of what he had heard being called 'Chicago'. He glanced around the city, eyes slightly wide. All around there were tall, concrete buildings, scantily-clad girls, decked out black guys who Envy wasn't worried about, but normal people would be, and then an onslaught of cars and traffic, along with suits of all kinds. Walking. Everywhere. "Big place." Envy said slowly after a moment, stretching with a smirk, "Well, old man. Appreciate you bringin' me out, but I got it from here." he saluted mockily and smirked, beginning to turn into a bird. He was just about to recreate himself into a dark, big, black crow, when suddenly, he felt a sharp tug on the back of his head, and he fell out of what he had formed- which was a layer of light feathers underneath his clothes, which were about to expand to cover his body as feathers. That was when Hohenheim, upon catching the teenager off-guard, hauled him into a black van that had pulled up, and a burly man opened the side door.
He tumbled into said van, cursing like a sailor. "What the ruddy HELL was that for you old, dry, wrinkly, bastard!" Envy shouted at Hohenheim who climbed into the passenger seat, nodding at the driver as they began driving. After about five minutes of silence- pardoning Envy's furied cursing and dark mutters- and Hohenheim still not giving any look like he was going to answer, Envy leaned back in his original form on the fake-leather seats and grunted at Hohenheim, "Oi, old man. Where the hell are we going?" Hohenheim answered him with a short answer, 'One minute, Jackson.', or some name like that. All in all, it was a disgusting, human name. Blergh. Humans. Disgusting creatures..
Jackson? Who the hell is Jackson? Envy looked taken aback, then disgust crossed his face, "Listen to you, old man! You're going senile! Who the hell is this fucking..." Hohenheim turned to give him an icy glare, motioning to the driver who kept his eyes on the road. Though, he would have to be deaf not to hear Envy's bitching. "Fucking...Uh.." Envy understood. This guy could probably sell him to some freak show for millions of dollars. No more white buildings for Envy! "Uh...George..Bush..guy? Who the hell is this fucking George Bush guy." he said, "I saw him on a billboard." And it was true. The man was on a big billboard with his thumb up and some..war slogan?..Oh! War! Envy thought gleefully, then he stopped. No, Envy wouldn't have a part in this war. For once. A war without Envy! Envy frowned and crossed his arms again, wanting to break out of this stupid black van, yet he knew it wasn't an option as long as this stranger held his future in his hands. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. No, he wasn't going to sleep.
At least he didn't think so. Turns out he did. He didn't know how long, but after he closed his eyes, it seemed as if they were at an airport. So, maybe he didn't sleep at all. Who knew? He didn't. And, then again, he didn't really care, seeing as how long he slept wasn't the most pressing matter on his brain at this point and time. He didn't even really NEED sleep, in reality. So, in the next moment he was carted out, Hohenheim paid the driver who nodded and zoomed off to god-knows-where, and then there were in. The airport, anyway. Racing through the packed place was like a giant hedge-maze. First, they butted in line to the front of the ladies at check in. Hohenheim said some things, showed them something, pointed to Envy- who was inspecting his nails in a vain manner at the time as people walked past him, staring at the pale, flat-chested girl, who was, in fact, a male. And whenever someone with a particularly high testosterone level approached him, Envy would looked up, smile coyly, flirt for a moment, then bend down and whisper slowly, "Lets go into the bathroom." At which point in time, said man would give the thumbs up to his buddies and follow the girl into the bathroom. Five seconds was all that was needed.
Yes, yes. After five seconds, there would be a scream from the bathroom, and the man would come out- his hair messed, zipping up his pants frantically, his shirt thrown on carelessly. He would run to his friends, whisper hysterically, and at that moment, Envy would step out, looking devious. Oh yes, Envy was a male. Male and bi and fucking PROUD. Envy would flash them a cocky grin, give another coy little finger-twiddling wave, and turn, going back to Hohenheim- who was reading a magazine in a desperate attempt to ignore Envy's playing with the other males. Finally, the time came when a nice little lady in a navy blue suit walked over to them, talked to Hohenheim in a small voice, then began walking away. He followed, and, reluctantly, Envy did as well, seeing as he hardly had any place to go and call his own.
The two men, indistinguishable as relatives, none the less father and son, were led outside the airport, and led to a small plane, in which the small door on the side opened, and a portable-staircase moved to guide them into the plane. Once inside, the device moved back, and they were free to look about the plane. It was small- only about 7 rows- though all the chairs were large and luxurious. They spoke to the pilot who would be piloting them on their ride (When I say 'they', I mean Hohenheim, as Envy would not bear himself to have idle chatter with a human, nonetheless act as if he respected said human's job, authority. Plus, Envy would never admit that the pilot had complete control over his immortal life.) And then were ushered down to sit in their own seats.
Twisting and turning in said seat, Envy finally groaned, "Why are these things so damned uncomfortable? And why can't we just sit wherever the hell we want? Nobody else is getting on, dammit." he cursed and squirmed again, crossing his arms darkly.
His father sighed, "Because we're obedient humans. We do what they say since they hold our lives in their hands." he said to Envy, putting extra pronunciation on 'lives'.
Envy looked taken aback, "Excuse me? I don't know about you, jackass, but last time I checked, I was imm-" at that moment, a flight attendant walked by.
"Sir," she said after a moment of looking at the normal-looking blonde man covering the abnormal, girl-looking's mouth. She decided to ignore it, and after this talk, never speak to them again. What weirdos. The flight attendant cleared her throat and continued, "Sir, since this passage from America to Berlin, Germany, is strictly forbidden in commercial flight because of the war, I'm going to tell you that all that lights in the cabin will go off once we're off the ground, so as the fighter planes will not notice us and mistakenly attack us." she said clearly. "Thank you for flying with us, and we'll alert you when we're about to land." she said with a tiny nod. Then, she hastily moved away to the front compartment.
Slowly, Hohenheim moved his hand from Envy's mouth, "Envy, would you mind not proclaiming the fact that you're immortal to the entirety of this plane?" he asked harshly, glancing up, "Would you also mind changing into something more...suitable, for this ride? You're making the attendants suspicious."
"Which is all of, what? FIVE PEOPLE?" Envy fumed darkly, "Who really CARES if I make them 'suspicious'! Let 'em be!" and then he stopped. Hohenheim had found his way down to Envy's thigh while he was ranting, and it currently rested about an inch from his oroburos. He felt his heart- and maybe all other vital organs in his not-quite-living body- constrict. Hohenheim saw fear, astonishment, and puzzlement cross Envy's pale features before finally settling on one- anger. He saw Envy's head dart up from where it used to be just staring at his hand, his violet eyes gleaming and flashing in ways that Hohenheim didn't know existed in a human, or a sin, or ANYTHING for that matter. "Move your hand, old man," Envy said, his voice deadly soft, "before I remove it myself." he threatened.
"Now, Envy." Hohenheim said silkily, putting his hand right over top of it, but not touching envy's skin. "You wouldn't wish to become pure now? After all you've striven for? After all you've been through?" He said slowly. He knew he had the upper hand. Envy's fury just convinced him of it all more. He saw Envy raise his lip, then fall back, defeated. He said not a word to Hohenheim, but contented himself with icy silence- which was sometimes worse than the grumbling and pissed-off cursing.
In about 12 hours or more, Envy had lost track of time, staring listlessly out the window and watching the clouds turn darkish purple, then turn white again, and it seemed like as soon as they took off, a voice was calling from the main compartment, saying that they were now on Berlin, Germany, and that their ride to Munich Germany would be waiting for them at the drop-off point, and that their luggage will be sent to them in one days time.
Envy had changed clothes, from his skin-tight attire to black vest and loose baggy black jeans. Smirking a bit as he added another touch- dark sunglasses- he put his hair in a high ponytail at the back of his head, pushing his sunglasses up to push back the remaining strands of hair from his face. As he stepped in front of the door in which they were to exit, and it opened, the sun blazed into his eyes. He scowled and flicked his sunglasses over his eyes, taking the first step out.
Taking that first step seemed to be much more then it should have been. With the light that tried fruitlessly to blind him, there were other, smaller flashes of brighter- if that was even possible- light. He scowled at it darkly. Damn morning sun and er..Mini. Suns..He scowled deeper, "What the hell is going on?" he hissed behind him at Hohenheim, who sighed deeply, "Well?" Envy demanded, deciding to be impatient. It wasn't like he had no reason or something. He was thrown into a big fucking black van, taken to a damned airport place which was loud, and crowded, and had stupid boys and their stupid hormones...His lip raised in distaste.
"I'll explain in the car. Can you see it?" Hohenheim asked, then pointed to a dark shape through the throngs of mini-suns and what appeared to be people, "For now, though, don't answer any questions anyone asks, don't talk to anybody, and for god's sake, Envy. Please don't have a fit and have a scene and attack someone, I'm BEGGING you." he growled.
"Yeah, yeah. Like I would want to talk to these stupid humans, anyway.." Envy said darkly, waving his hand at him and beginning to make his way through the people to the black, slim, very official-looking car. He sniffed in disdain at the humans who flashed their cameras and held these...things...in front of his face. They were called 'Microphones' if he was correct. With a finally lunge through the crowd- sidestepping a couple of girls who could use some serious dental care- he dove into the car's open door theatrically, grinning wickedly to himself.
A moment later, Hohenheim stepped in as well, closing the door and talking to the driver in a different language. Say what? Envy caught himself thinking. After a moment of silence, though, Hohenheim turned to Envy and sighed, "I'm sorry you got caught up like that. But, the little facade you're going under while you're in Munich is that you're a small rock band's lead singer." Envy raised an eyebrow, "Now, the reason this is so, is because you'll get all the respect you need, you'll most likely get free lodging if you wish to go someplace- which I figured you'd like- and if you all of a sudden vanish..Meaning, if you manage to get on the other side of the gate, nobody on this side will really question you if you vanish randomly and we tell them, 'Oh he went on a little personal time'. In this world, celebrities do it all the time."
"..Ah.." Envy said slowly after a moment, as if he understood. He didn't. But, after a couple moments of mulling over what the blonde-haired 'father' of his said, a broad smirk crossed his face, "So, wait...What you're saying, is that I can treat people like dirt, walk around like a king and be treated as such, for as long as I'm here, if I pretend to be this rocker person?" At his father's nod, a slow, mischievous, devilish grin- which I would not like to see on ANYBODY'S face- spread over his lips, exposing every last one of his sharp, shark-like teeth. "Perrrrrfect."
-!-
In Munich, a very pissed off little blonde walked into the military headquarters, his brown trenchcoat fluttering behind him, and his blonde ponytail slipping down between his shoulder blades. "I can't believe that bastard is still going to work. I thought he was supposed to be with ENVY, dammit. I specifically told him, 'Don't let anybody else pick up Envy. He knows you from the other side. I'm trusting you only with this, so don't be a bastard and FUCK IT UP.'" he growled darkly to himself, stopping in the empty hallway to slam his fist against a wall in frustration, "And WHAT does he do? He fucks it up! I knew I shouldn't have trusted that egotistical, cocky, dead-brained, half witted.."
"...Thanks for the compliments." came a congested, nasally voice from behind him. Whipping around, Edward saw Roy, a cup of tea..or maybe coffee..in his hand. "You know, I would have gone, but I didn't want to make an ass of myself when I came sneezing and having to blow my nose constantly." Roy said darkly. Well, as dark as he could manage- he DID sound pretty dorky what with the congestion going on.
Edward held in a snicker before he growled, "If you didn't want to make an ass of yourself, why did you come to work today!" he snarled, "And I told you to go get Envy! What, is he just going to have to wait? He's probably hating me already for not coming to get him in the first place, but now you're making him wait for about EVER." the blonde fumed darkly.
"I always make an ass of myself at work, whether I'm sick or not." the dark-haired man said flatly and coughed a bit before sighing disdainfully, "I sent someone to get him with my ticket. I made sure that Envy would know who he was, and he's perfectly fine. He's being taken care of fine. He'll probably be here by-" he sneezed, "Tuesday."
"Tuesday?" Ed asked skeptically, "It's SUNDAY. Why would it take them an extra two days to get here!" the shorter blonde demanded angrily, placing his hands on his hips in a demanding manner.
"Because with the cover I gave them," Roy replied evenly, taking a sip of his tea/coffee whatever-the-hell-it-was, "I figure that, with your description of Envy, he'll wish to enjoy the attention for a while before coming and partying in your pants." he said and grinned wickedly, his onyx-colored eyes glinting in mirth.
Edward stopped mid-rant and his eyes widened, his jaw dropping as he began opening and closing it like a fish. His face heated up and he stuttered, "I..I...I...I'm highly respected..and...and..stuff...and..and..I don't have to take this from you, ya know!" Edward shouted obnoxiously, pointing a finger in Roy's now glee-filled face. "Stop smirking you stupid, ignorant, STUPID...Stupid face!" Edward floundered to form an intelligent comeback. He failed, sadly. With another indignant sniff, he asked, "Who the hell did you send in your place, anyways?"
"Hohenheim. I believe you're acquainted." Roy said smoothly, raising an eyebrow, "Rather closely acquainted if I know him myself."
Edward turned pale, "Oh dear lord, you sent HOHENHEIM?" he hit his head on a wall, "Well its as simple as that. We're SCREWED."
-!-
Sorry there was such time between posts. I know you all hate me for not having much Edo/Envy. But NO WORRIES. As Roy gleefully stated, the partying in the pants is JUST TO COME. 8D Yah, this story is actually drawing close to the end, and I don't think it'll have a happy ending. :o sorry to disappoint. IN ANY CASE. There was some Edo for ye, hope you enjoyed him. There will be more of him in the next couple of chapters. But school starts in 3 weeks! ;; Oh, and I changed my penname. :D
PURA VIDA MI AMIGOS. 3
Lex