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Chapter 12:
"I promise I'll make sure you're safe."
March stares at Bunny, but he just waits for her response. She's not sure exactly how to respond. He was trying to convince her to let him take her into his tunnels. Not for long, just long enough so she could settle her fears a little bit. But just the thought was making her uneasy.
"I appreciate the offer but no thanks." She says it in a rush and sits down underneath the tree as if to emphasize her lack of interest. Bunny sighs and sits next to her, but she keeps her eyes straight ahead.
"It's not right for one of our kind to be afraid of our tunnels. It's how we travel, and more importantly how we stay safe."
"Yeah, well, I wasn't exactly very safe the last time." She snaps, and then closes her eyes and groans internally as she realizes how harsh it had sounded. "I'm sorry."
"I understand." Bunny says, stretching out his legs in front of him. He frowns as he looks March over, seeing the tension in her shoulders and the tightness of her expression. She's clearly very uncomfortable, and he considers that he may have underestimated her feelings on the matter.
Of course he'd noticed how terrified she'd been when she fell into his tunnel, but he was surprised it was still affecting her. Once she figured out it was just him, she should have been okay. But obviously this fear goes much deeper. It would take some work to get rid of it.
"Do you want to conquer your fear of being underground?" He asks, and they sit in silence for a few moments before she answers.
"Yes." It's barely a whisper, but he can hear that it rings with truth. "But I can hardly stand it."
"Well, we can change that." He says again. "I can help you."
"No offense, but I don't really trust your tunnels at all." She says, making him laugh. He'd figured that much.
"Then we'll use yours." She glances at him in surprise, and he shrugs. "You open yours, and I'll follow at your pace. You don't have to stay under for too long, or even run. We could just walk until you feel comfortable."
"But-"
"Think about it." Bunny tries another tactic, one he knows will hit home. "You want to try to distract Pitch, but you'll still need to be able to protect yourself. We find refuge underground. Even if you manage to succeed above ground, if he or his night terrors try to attack, you'll need to get out of there quickly."
She frowns, and he feels a spark of triumph as the excuses die in her eyes. Now there's only soft uncertainty along with some annoyance that he's managed to derail her argument.
"I could…" She tries one more time, but it doesn't work. Her voice trails off and her shoulders slump. "I guess I didn't think that through."
"It's alright." Bunny mumbles. "I just want to help you become comfortable again. I know what happened to you was downright traumatizing. Hell, I don't know what I'd do if I had to go through that. But the Moon chose you for your courage. You have to believe that you still have that courage inside of you. I saw it when you protected Jamie and his friends." March blushes underneath her fur as his eyes nearly burn a hole through her head. His voice is too intense, sending strange feelings through her. "You need to tap into it now."
Unable to look away anymore, she glances up at him and holds his gaze. It's clear that he's not going to let up any time soon. She appreciated his attempts, but it just didn't change the fact that she was scared. She may have some courage, but it was hiding at the moment.
Unfortunately, he did have a point. She needed a backup plan in case the first went badly. She couldn't fight, and she couldn't rely on the others to watch her back when the time came. She'd need an escape route, and if she didn't trust her own tunnels…
"Fine." She sighs, wincing when her voice cracks.
She catches him smile out of the corner of her eye and when he stands up, she has to hold in a sudden refusal as the other part of her brain threatens to change her mind. But she had to do this, for her sake and the sake of the children. Decided, she forces herself to stand and jumps when her paw is suddenly enclosed in Bunny's.
"I promise I'll be right there with you. Nothing will go wrong." He says, but she just nods, not trusting her voice anymore. "Go ahead and open your tunnel."
It seems too soon, but she knows that if she waits too long, she'll indeed back out. And she had too much pride for that. She thumps her foot on the ground with a bit of hesitation, but immediately the ground opens up beneath her and she steps around it to avoid falling in. If she was going to do this, she was going to do it her way.
But he was still holding her paw with his, making her feel much too warm.
"Ready?"
"Don't rush me." She mutters, ignoring his laughter the demand evokes. But she leans forward to peek down into the hole. There's a tiny bit of light showing through, so she knows it won't be too dark. But it's still daunting, and she suddenly doesn't want to let go of Bunny's paw. "Okay."
She pulls away from him and he lets her go gently, sticking close as she slowly lowers herself into the tunnel. It's only when her feet touch the ground that he comes in behind her, staying by her side as if he's waiting for her to break down. I still might, she considers without humor, and stares down at end of the tunnel.
"You okay?"
"Yeah." She's thankful when her voice doesn't echo the shakiness she feels in her legs, and forces herself to move forward. The tunnel closes behind them though, and her steps falter until she reassures herself that she can get out at any time.
"There's no one else in here but us." Bunny says, and she snorts. I'm well aware of that. But she clings to it, considering that this was a good few centuries since that night. There are no night mares chasing her, tearing down her defenses and burying her alive. There's just Bunny. And he wouldn't do anything to hurt her. "Just go at whatever pace you're comfortable with, and I'll follow."
"You already said that." She's surprised when she manages to smile at him, and increases her speed to a brisk walk. It was better than going slowly enough that she could look around too carefully. Because as soon as she looks up she can practically see the ground collapsing, and she doesn't want to get caught up in those memories.
"Do you still have that egg I gave you?" He asks, and she smiles again.
"Of course." She'd drained the insides and kept the shell so she could hold onto it for a while. "I have it at Hogs' place, though."
Bunny frowns at that and holds in a rude comment. Of course he was happy she was still attached to his impromptu present, and he knew since she didn't have a place of her own she'd need to keep it somewhere safe to keep it from getting broken. Still, the idea that's he was so close to the groundhog was annoying to say the least.
"Make sure he doesn't break it."
"He won't." She laughs, and her confidence makes him feel a little better. "Will you two ever get along?" She considers that he'd changed the subject to a more cheerful one in an attempt to distract her and keep her from getting scared, but the longer they walk the more her uneasiness dissipates, and soon it almost feels as though they're walking around above ground among the flowers and trees they both enjoy.
"I doubt it." Bunny mumbles in response to her question. "He's so… serious."
"And you're not?" March asks with a giggle. "Honestly, you two are so alike, even if you don't want to admit it."
"I'm nothing like him." Bunny pauses for a moment, staring at her in horror. The last thing he wanted was for her to think of him like she did the groundhog.
"Sure you are." She doesn't stop walking, which is encouraging, and glances at him over her shoulder. "You're both kind, even if it's hidden by stress sometimes. Well, most of the time. You both get so nervous around certain times. You around Easter and Christmas, for obvious reasons." He grumbles under his breath and becomes mobile again, making her smirk. "And he gets nervous every time the seasons change. You both respond in the same way, but running around like chickens with your heads cut off. It's cute."
Cute? His frown deepens and he stares at the back of her head, trying to make sense of that. Cute was fine enough in describing her partner. It was clear all she felt for him was perhaps a comradery and a paternal attachment. But Bunny didn't want her thinking of him as cute. It was demeaning and not exactly how he would describe himself.
Jamie had called him cute when he had been reduced to his powerless state. It had been one of the most embarrassing moments of his life.
"I'm not cute." He grumbles, unable to help himself.
"Well no, I suppose not." March mutters, averting her eyes to the path ahead of them, and Bunny nearly chokes. That wasn't what he had wanted her to say. "You're more… handsome, I suppose."
"You suppose?" He can't help it. The way March suddenly wrings her paws together makes him smile.
"Yes, you are." She mumbles, and begins to walk quicker. Bunny stays behind her, not bothering to quicken his pace. He doesn't want to scare her again when it seems as though she's finally gotten comfortable. "Of course, you know you are."
"What?" That was confusing, and he watches her shrug.
"Well, no offense but you're quite arrogant."
"So you've said before." He laughs. "But I wouldn't say that's because of my clearly impressive looks."
"Ugh." She rolls her eyes, but he can see her smile.
"I suppose I used the arrogance as a way to ignore the pain of being alone." That makes her smile disappear, and she looks at him in surprise. Of course she knew he had been feeling alone during his Guardianship, but to hear him say that was much more than she expected. "If I don't seem sad, the others can't smother me with sympathy. It's just easier, ya know?"
"I guess." She mumbles, her mood suddenly dampened. "But it still doesn't take the loneliness away."
That makes Bunny swallow roughly, and he hates that she can make him feel like bearing his soul. He wants to bring up that same wall of arrogance to protect himself from the pain, but surprisingly he can't. He just looks at her and nods in agreement. Her eyes soften, and then she looks up at the grass above their heads.
"Just like my trying to stay out of my tunnels doesn't make the fear go away. If anything, it makes it worse."
"How are you feeling now?"
"Good." She whispers, looking back at him. "Thank you."
"Don't thank me yet. We still have to get you out." He points above them and stops walking. "You ready?" She stops as well, and then looks over her shoulder further in.
"In a minute." Before she can change her mind, she drops down to all fours and takes off, her breath hitching as she moves around the twists and turns, her fur never really touching the grassy edges around her.
An almost hysterical laugh leaves her as the adrenaline rushes through her. There was absolutely no danger this time, and it was fantastic. She could really enjoy the habitat she was born for, and although her speed is reckless, she knows she'll be just fine. Especially when she hears Bunny's feet pounding on the ground behind her.
Just as he'd promised, he's right behind her, making sure she's okay. The knowledge makes her heart clench in her chest. She's not used to having someone other than Hogs looking after her. And with Bunny it feels completely different.
Right, somehow.
xxRISExx
"Hi."
March jumps when the voice comes out of nowhere, and looks up to see Tooth hovering above her. But it's the sly grin on her face that worries her.
"So I hear you've conquered your fear of claustrophobia." That makes her eyes widen, and Tooth giggles before settling down next to her.
"How did you hear about that?"
"From Jack!" She replies, and March vaguely wonders when they'd found the time to get together. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. They'd been making eyes at each other when they thought no one was looking for quite a while now. If she had to guess, it wouldn't be much longer before they were officially together. "Supposedly he saw you two pop out of the ground, smiling and laughing. You looked pretty cozy."
Now she can tell Tooth isn't just excited about her conquering her fear, and blushes underneath her fur. Tooth was implying something much more, and she puts down her pen to rush into an explanation to set her straight.
"He was just helping me get used to my tunnels. We decided that I needed an out in case things got too dangerous when Pitch shows up, and so he wanted to be there while I tried staying down there. It was nothing." Well, it wasn't nothing. But to imply that there was more was-
"Oh, come on." Tooth scoffs and scoots closer to March, her expression that of a very determined matchmaker. "There's got to be more. It's so out of Bunny's character."
"Maybe you just don't know all of Bunny's character." March says, and then wishes she hadn't when Tooth's mouth drops open. "I mean… he's… he was just being nice. And he wanted to help me because we're most likely the last Pooka on earth. It's just-"
"You like him, don't you?"
"What?"
"Well you just stood up for him, you're acting as though he's opened up to you which I definitely don't take for granted, and just as we're talking about him you're getting all flustered."
"I am not." March shakes her head, trying to keep her knee from bouncing. As it is her writing is now sloppy and practically unreadable. She flips the page over and starts writing again, trying to ignore Tooth's teasing eyes. "He's a great guy, sure, but I'm not… interested in him."
She winces as the lie passes her lips and tries to pull it off as a less than pleasurable tally of the dandelions.
"March-"
"He can be so annoying at times." She cuts Tooth off, the words rushing forth. "He's always unhappy with my decisions about the seasons, always has something negative to say about when Easter is on the calendar, and in the past he's interfered with my job so much that it's made it that much harder on myself and Hogs. It's so… infuriating!"
"Sure, that was a while ago. Before you joined us." Tooth says, and March knows she hasn't succeeded in convincing the fairy or herself that most of the feelings she had for Bunny were negative. "But how do you feel now?"
Her paw stops moving above the notepad, the word she'd been writing becoming lost as her mind wanders. In the past few months she'd found herself constantly becoming closer to them all, but Bunny especially seemed to hold a special place in her heart. She could tell herself it was only because they were Pooka, but she knew that was another lie.
"He's… great." Is all she says. But she knows Tooth sees right through it when her smile widens and her wings flutter happily. "I'm learning more about him than I ever thought I would. But it's… weird."
"Why?"
"Because I never saw any of this coming."
"Well, to be honest I don't think any of us did." Tooth laughs, and March joins in after a moment. "But I have to admit that it's nice to see him so happy."
"He's happy?" March's eyes widen in surprise at that statement. It's not that she thought he was unhappy, but the idea that somehow his attitude had changed just because of her was hard to believe.
"Of course. Haven't you noticed?"
"Well…" She trails off and shrugs uncomfortably.
"I don't mean to make you uncomfortable." Tooth says softly. "It's just that you joining us is so surreal that I can't help but feel as though there's something more to it than you helping us with Pitch. I mean, at first Bunny thought he was the last of his kind, and suddenly you appear."
"So?" March stares down at her notepad, trying to seem nonchalant.
"So, give Bunny a chance." Tooth smiles. "Did you ever consider that maybe the Moon kept you safe knowing Bunny would need you later?"
"But he doesn't need me, not really. If anything, I needed him to help me with my fear."
"Well then maybe you should give him the chance to want you." March jerks upright as if struck, and stares at Tooth. "You're speaking as though there was some deep reason for you joining us. Sure, the easiest explanation is that somehow you're needed to help us defeat Pitch. But maybe there's something else as simple as you being there for Bunny as a friend, or even more." She sighs and reaches out to stop March's now fidgeting paws. "I'm not saying you need to give your heart to him now. It's obvious that you're still getting used to this. Just… give him the benefit of the doubt as well. If he doesn't need you, let him decide that he wants you unconditionally."
"You really think he could?" It wasn't that March thought he wouldn't like her. During the time they'd spent together he'd made it clear he wanted friendship. But love? That was an entirely different situation that she wasn't ready for. And as for unconditional love, she wasn't sure that could happen. Mostly she was worried he'd feel like he had no other option.
They were the last two Pooka. She didn't want Bunny wanting her because they only had each other. But maybe that was a blessing, the chance they both needed. If they only have each other, then there's less to keep them apart.
"I do." Tooth answers, and March feels herself smile. "It's obvious that you two are getting closer. And just as he's good for you, I think you could be good for him."
March thinks back to how they had run through her tunnels almost completely carefree. It really had been nice, having him there. It felt as though she'd let herself open up to something entirely new when she joined the Guardians. But she had no idea it could possibly be love.
Now all she had to do was use her newfound courage to open up her heart.
xxRISExx
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