Disclaimer: Obviously all of the game characters, places etc. are creative property of BioWare.

A quick side note: I recently got a PM and wanted to clear something up. For those who actually did delve into the Mass Effect universe deep and hard, someone pointed out that that there was a slight difference between the codex and game interpretation of one aspect of Elysium than presented by me. For those who don't know what it is I will not say it, but for those who do and felt frustrated by the change (at least enough to let me know) keep reading and you'll see.

BETA READER: AblatedCrayon [To your last note, it was actually intended to take place where you're at, I realize it's a bit frustrating to add quirks to stuff we saw in the game, but remember it's not a complete fanfic so all the questions will be answered]

Chapter 11

In a Jam

The difference between the possible and the impossible lies in a man's determination.

Tommy Lasorda

The ship was old, much older than the usual Alliance transports, but not too far behind the ones Josh used for his recent travels. Even so, he could hear the FTL drive rumbling and even felt the hull of the ship shaking. He tried to ignore it, but a small part of him was convinced the ship would fall apart any minute. Still, judging from the way Wrex was relaxed, the ship was tested, and by the look of it, more than once. Besides that, having a quarian pilot during space voyages was one of the best insurance policies one could have.

Josh tried to convince himself that it was the instability of the ship that caused him to lose sleep, but he was never a good liar. His throat felt dry, and he realized that he had not had a single drop of any kind of liquor in two days now. He refused to count the battlemaster as one; that was something else, nothing a sane person should ever put inside their body.

After a few hours of simply trying to fall asleep, Josh decided to take matters into his own hands. He slowly moved his body to sit upright on his bunk. He sat there for just a second, regaining the feeling in his limbs from the numbness of poor circulation. His head was spinning slightly, but that could be due to the fact that the ship hit a few tough spots during the voyage and began to shake violently for a few seconds. Josh held to the bunk's sides hard enough for his knuckles to go white.

After that was done, Josh pushed himself off the bed and looked around. He found his weapons first before heading out of the small room he chose as his quarters for the duration of the fight. He quickly found the 'mess hall' in the ship, or at least what Alliance soldiers would call a mess hall. The room was full of tables and chairs, most of them too old to be sat upon. The lights were dim, and Josh had to wait for just a few seconds for his vision to readjust in order to be able to see where he was stepping.

The object of interest was a very common-looking rusty fridge almost on the other end of the room. Josh slowly walked towards it, trying to be a little quieter, but not succeeding in preventing the echoes of his footsteps from piercing the air around him. As he got closer, his hand reached out for the handle, sliding it aside to reveal nothing.

Josh stood looking into the empty refrigerator for a few seconds before closing the door. His back turned and pressed up against a cold wall of the 'mess hall.' Slowly his body slumped to the floor, his head now buried in his knees.

"Looking for something like this?" he heard a coarse voice and looked up.

Josh never noticed the lone man who was sitting not too far from the fridge. He was bald-shaven, and his face showed signs of aging. There was a big scar by the man's left lip, and over all his skin it seemed excessively wrinkly. His thin face looked almost hollow around his cheek bones, and his nose was slightly jammed into it; maybe because it was broken, but Josh really couldn't tell, not in the dimly lit room like this. In the man's hand dangled a half full bottle of Jack Daniels, at least liquor never changed.

"Something like that," Josh pushed off the wall and swiped the bottle clean from the man's hand.

As the whiskey poured down his throat it burned; it burned him hard. He never found full refuge in the drink, never crawled up in the bottle, but it was something that kept him walking the fine edge of sanity. Something that made him feel both better and worse—the little personal paradox of his existence.

Josh remembered the first time he ever picked up the bottle, the day that he poured an explicit amount of the 'fire water' down his throat. Surprisingly enough it was not immediately after Elysium, like for most of those who survived. Josh persevered, edged out the desire back then, leaned on his friends, on his commanders, on his sister. He pushed through.

Neither did it happen after Kamilah, Shepard, and Sarah left. He felt alone and lost, living an illusion rather than a tangible life. Back then he was just going through the motions, trying to get back in shape, trying to get things in perspective for himself, and liquor never entered that equation. He heard Shepard kick about a few post-traumatic depression joints, and even Kamilah often vented over the e-mails, but Josh stayed surprisingly calm.

He didn't hit the bottle until he went to visit Tanya's grave, the place where she was buried, and her home. For personal reasons he had stood clear of her family, mostly not to have to deal with their grief as well as his own. Tanya's sister, however, sought him out and came to him. They had numerous conversations that trailed off into the night, sharing memories of Tanya. It was at that moment that Josh found refuge in something else than himself.

He saw Katya's face and could not get over how similar it was to her sister's. On some nights it took him several seconds to shake out of the disbelief, grounding himself in reality. Only seeing what he had lost brought him down to the level with everyone else, and then took him even further. He wanted to touch Tanya again, to run his hands through her hair, to hear her whisper something, anything, softly into his ear. Josh took an extended and unpaid leave of absence, which would turn out to be at first indefinite and later permanent.

The fiasco on Torfan didn't help. Surely it was a retaliatory strike at those who caused Alliance and humanity much pain, but they never hit those responsible directly, those who launched the attacks and hit the button. It was at that moment that Josh erased from the back of his mind any remaining desires to go back to the Alliance, even if they took him back, and decided to move on with his life. But like everything else, certain things needed closure, and it was that need that brought him to this very moment, gulping down on Jack Daniels, aboard an old vessel about to help out a krogan mercenary.

"Slow down there," the man's coarse voice interrupted Josh's drinking ritual, "I didn't mean take it all."

Josh handed the bottle to the man and went back to the wall, leaning on it this time, but not quite allowing his body to fall down. He felt the liquor engage with his system, even steady him out a bit. Perhaps now he wouldn't have much trouble going to sleep, not that he had any particular desire to anymore.

"What makes you so special," the man asked, his voice heavily laced with apparent intoxication, "getting to strut around with the krogan like that?"

"I'm relatively sober," Josh was not trying to put forth the cold shoulder, but he felt a slight tinge of irritation seeing someone of his species fall this low. Perhaps that was how Wrex felt about the genophage.

"A funny man, huh?" The man swallowed another mouth full of whiskey. "Real funny. If I was still in my top form I would squash you where you stand."

"I highly doubt that," Josh wanted to end the conversation quickly, before liquor and ambition led to something stupid.

"Oh yeah I would," the man said, his tone indicating that aggression was gone. A case of nostalgia took its place. "In my day, even those snotty Alliance chicks wanted to be with me. One even was, that stupid bitch."

"That's not every nice," Josh's tone was lighter, allowing the incident to disappear into thin air, but he still wasn't too impressed with the man.

"What do you know, huh?" the man stood up straight and pointed his index finger straight down the middle of Josh's chest. "Nothing! Did you ever lose a wife or a daughter to service? That stupid piece of a whore. And then she tells me I'm useless, and I've never amounted to anything. So I said fuck her and left, went out to make my own fortune, by any way possible."

Josh didn't respond, not that anyone was expecting him too. This was one of those peculiar cases of alcohol awakening the long dormant memories—the ones it was meant to suppress in the first place. He never had one of those, but often bore witness. Many men usually spewed on about their life stories and all the grief and misfortune at the slightest instigation, sometimes even without one. It seemed that liquor had the ability to wedge open the flood gates that most human consciences preferred to keep under lock and key, in the deep cellars of their memories. Josh started to shuffle slowly towards the exit, nothing that his conversation partner was already deep lost in one of his own.

Even though the liquor steadied him outs somewhat, Josh was very reluctant to go back to sleep. There couldn't be much longer until their destination and he did not want to be awakened by another shot to his ribcage. With a certain air of determination and confidence to him, he made his way steadily towards the bridge.

The bridge was almost as dimly lit as the mess hall, identifying the ship's age as at least 10-15 years, maybe older. Many mercenaries and other illegal operatives often scrambled with what they could get, either from the copious amounts of galactic junkyards, or taking what they could in raids, so no ship ever saw a loyal owner past its original purpose. This seemed different; it seemed to Josh that Wrex preferred to keep this heap over picking up something more recent. He couldn't decide whether such loyalty to a ship was idiotic or noble.

Wrex was standing alone on the bridge, looking silently ahead of him at nothing in particular. There was an air of concentration. It was as hard as ever to determine what the reptilian was thinking about from his face, and Josh gave up trying. The atmosphere around him felt almost serene, focused. For a second Josh himself forgot to breathe, enthralled by the sheer presence of the krogan.

"Are you ready," Josh heard the krogan ask.

"Probably," he spoke, "don't really like asari commandoes that much. Why did you choose me? I know that must sound like a broken record, but I would like to know with no bullshit this time."

"The Shadow Broker tracked you," Wrex simply replied, without trying to deny anything. "Suggested your profile for this mission, suggested that you may even give up some of the bounty for other 'forms' of payment."

"Simple enough," Josh closed his eyes for a second. Turns out he didn't keep his movements as quiet as he wished. However, the Shadow Broker was (or were) the best at information gathering, and nothing escaped his nets. "Still doesn't make me qualified to deal with the asari commandoes."

If the Shadow Broker knew of him, he must have known of his past, what happened, that would have been one of the worst recommendations to make—unless Josh was not expected to be making the return trip.

"Well, I'll kill them," Wrex said without a moment of hesitation. "If you happen to put a bullet in the krogan's skull, I will not stop you."

Josh allowed his glance to look up at the reptilian at his side, studying his expression yet again, and getting nothing. He felt as if Wrex was not telling him everything about his history with his race, about what he felt truly about their fate, but he didn't want to probe. This was the 'man' who offered him a solution to his own ghosts, or at least a path to one. He was not going to inquire about the other man's pains unless he thought it was necessary.

"We need to unite," Wrex went on, talking as much to himself as to Josh, "we need to realize that there is no solution unless we stay together. It is not my fault that this is all we do; it's in our history, in our genetics, but we need to adopt, evolve, like everyone else did."

"Perhaps your species needs someone to make them see that," Josh reasoned, almost suggestively.

"Not me," Wrex's tone felt a little more offensive, "never got anything good for trying."

Josh felt it wise to leave it there. The krogan were not known for grieving or even sharing what they felt. Throughout Citadel Space, the reptilian race was nothing more than tools, to be used at the expense of those who had the means to hire them. The fact that Wrex told him as much as he had was already troubling Josh, or at least made him question the nature of his 'employer.' He felt it best to focus on the mission and hope that Wrex was half the warrior he suspected him to be, and that he wouldn't put one in the back of his head when they were done to hoard the rewards.

MExMExMExME

The ship had already dropped off the human squad not too far from the base. Wrex instructed the leader of the squad to advance on foot and pick up the speed. Josh watched them trot off into the distance, finding himself caught up in the fact how impartial he was to see those men going to certain death. He simply watched them move on.

The ship flew under the radar for a few more minutes. Wrex did not say a word for that time, simply staying by the edge and looking at the ground below him. The krogan preferred not to close the hatch of the ship, rather allowing the air rush past him. As the frigate passed close to the surface, the reptilian's legs detached from the metal flooring and Wrex leapt down, with Josh following.

It seemed that the krogan was running before they hit the ground. Josh tried hard to keep on, but the krogan trotted over the varying terrain with ease, hopping over hills as if it was nothing. Josh thought he was in good shape up until this point, and probably was, however Wrex was a battle master, raised on a lifetime of battle. Keeping steady breathing was getting hard, and he felt his own heart beat through his temples, small drips of sweat coming down his forehead. The armour felt fairly light, but it got heavier with every step; Wrex, however, paid none of his equipment any notice, simply moving one foot ahead of the other.

Josh has not been to too many planets. His parents preferred to vacation on Earth, using local destinations for their rest. With the Alliance he barely got anywhere past big human colonies such as Elysium. Only after his 'disappearance' did he start seeing other planets. They were always so diverse, so different—some cold, some hot, some humid, some uninhabitable. He thought he has seen it all but every new landing brought a rush of excitement whenever there was no threat of Thresher Maws or other wildlife.

The frozen surface of Amaranthine crunched underneath his feet. It was hard to imagine any wildlife surviving in such cold; even through his suit Josh could feel a chill. At first he worried about the weapons, but even the worst of them were built well enough to withstand such conditions, especially the ones that he bought to replace his Alliance standards. The surface was lit in twilight blues and purples, reflecting off Josh's visor, blinding him slightly but creating a rather calm ambiance all around. It felt almost a shame to ruin it with shooting that was surely to come. A silicate moon was visible up above, and Josh gave it a quick glance before following after Wrex again.

After about ten minutes they reached an artificial formation in the frozen rock. It felt like someone mined a small tunnel under the base, with a small incline downwards. The lights were dim, but artificial sources could be seen slightly further down. Wrex paused for a second, checking his omni-tool.

"Right on time," he said, "The first group should be approaching the base now. Gives us enough time."

Josh tried to nod, but his neck was too cold to bend. He shivered inside his armour, not sure whether or not he would survive the run back. Hopefully, the quarian pilot would come closer for extraction. After all, most of the hostile threats would be eliminated, and there would be no need to avoid detection.

The krogan moved right past the human into the artificial tunnel, Josh quickly following. For the first few steps his eyes were focused on the lights ahead, and as they came closer they came became brighter. He squinted while Wrex simply moved past, putting his giant lizard-like hand on the metal door, feeling the thin crust of ice formed around it. Quickly he activated his omni-tool, banging a few keys on it.

A small panel slid out beside the metal door, lighting up in a dim yellow light. Wrex walked up to it and looked at the data on his omni-tool before keying in a few numbers into the panel. The panel responded to the krogan's touch with a few short beeps before giving out a nice long one. The light blinked twice and switched to green. The door opened, the thin layer of ice cracked, falling to the ground and breaking into miniature pieces at their feet.

The Shadow Broker's reputation is growing on me by the minute, Josh raised his own eyebrow.

Wrex did not turn around to check for the reaction; he simply moved inside the door. Josh followed closely in his footsteps. The door gave another squeal behind them as it slid back into place. The tunnel lights were dim and Josh had to be very careful where he was going. Luckily, the krogan was not overly discrete with his movements. The hard boots of the reptilian's battle armour rang through the hallway, although becoming damped out beyond a short radius.

As they moved the walls displayed a number of niches at alternating distances, just enough to fit one of them. Josh figured these were for cover in case the retreat faced any pursuers. Wrex raised his hand, stopping suddenly in between two of the cover-holes. The hallway felt silent for a second, silent enough for them to hear each other breath. Josh took a few deep breaths, listening to the deep and coarse movement of krogan's chest scraping against his armour suit.

Wrex ducked off to the side, pushing off Josh into the other cover. Josh heard the quiet mechanical sound of a shotgun extending into attack mode. A dim light over Wrex's head created a slightly disturbing glow as the krogan's eyes constantly shifted between the usual violent red and a yellowish tint that looked almost ghostly. Josh pulled out his own pistol, the sound of it unpacking itself making him slightly relaxed.

The next minutes dragged on for hours. Neither Wrex nor Josh said a single thing, the silence engulfing them completely and wholly. After a few minutes, as his ears got used to the silence, Josh could hear the vibrations in the lights, humming over his head and creating a bit of tension. The frontal assault should be well under way by now, and hopefully it was progressing at least semi-successfully.

After a few more dreadful minutes, the lights started to flicker harder and yellow light got replaced with an almost blinding white shine. It took Josh a while to readjust to the sudden brightness of the hallway, and he privately cursed the damn near reflecting walls that amplified the lights. There was no sound yet, and Wrex showed no reaction to the lights, just leaning harder back against the wall. The krogan's shotgun was firmly pressed against his chest, and although his face remained still, Josh felt as if the reptilian was almost serene.

A lone echo of footsteps came from inside the base. Josh felt his hand grip the pistol handle harder as the sound got closer. His back was well against the wall and the scarping of the armour against it made a little grinding sound. As the footsteps amplified an asari shape entered his view. Wrex gave a loud cough, stopping her in her tracks. The asari turned her head to face the krogan, her hand instinctively reaching for a weapon at her hip. Josh blew her brains out from behind as more footsteps were heard from inside the base.

A soft bluish glow covered the krogan's shape as the biotic barrier activated itself. Seconds after, Wrex pushed his back off the wall and turned the corner. His shotgun was ready, the blast going off before the massive shape fully entered the hallway. In response, a barrage of bullets crossed Wrex's body, most of them stopped by either a biotic shield or the kinetic barrier. The reptilian turned back to cover, but a wave of blue energy hit him square in the side, sending him tumbling down.

By the time Josh leaned out, the krogan bodyguard was rushing towards him, covered by automatic fire from the two asari behind him. He quickly threw up a barrier and created a lift, pushing himself, lifting the massive reptilian body into the air. He felt his shoulder burn as a bullet pierced through both the shield and the hardened weave. He jerked and felt his body go stiff and unresponsive, seeing the krogan's shape drop back to the floor.

He had never experienced stasis before, but realized what it was like. What felt like a hard shell around his body prevented him from moving, yet his brained worked perfectly fine. He could see the two asari aiming their guns at him and waiting for the appropriate moment. Josh's muscles tensed as he panicked, attempting to break through the barrier, even though he realized it was all futile. The krogan bodyguard got up himself, recovering his weapon and shooting off a sideways glance in his direction.

As the stasis loosened Josh clenched his eyes, almost ready to let go and disappear. A hard shove pushed him back into cover as he felt one of the bullets graze his shoulder. His head knocked into the wall, sending his perception out of control slightly. With his pistol on the floor Josh pulled out a shotgun.

Wrex was on the floor in front of him, down from the shove he gave the human. A quick reevaluation of the situation told Josh that two asari were temporarily out for a few seconds due to a biotic push, however the krogan adversary was running towards Wrex at an amazing speed, his shotgun on the ready. Reacting instinctually, Josh threw a biotic warp at one of the asari, hoping to disable her, just in time to hear two simultaneous shotgun blasts. Wrex backed away from the force of the blow to his abdominal, but so did the other krogan.

As the two battle master's squared off, the body guard moved before the mercenary, finding his feet quicker. He rushed at his counterpart, the sound of his shotgun cocking ringing through the air. Josh took a deep breath, stepping into the creature's path, his shotgun barrel level with the krogan's head. One loud shot left any wondering about what krogans looked like inside. The slightly goo-like and luminous blood covered the floor before him.

Wrex's massive hand pushed Josh to the ground as he saw two grenades fly over his head. The asari were back in position now, firing consistently. While on the floor, Josh reached for his pistol, grabbing it with both hands and aiming. The first two shots were stopped by the kinetic barrier, and a push caught him before he could fire a third one.

It felt like being caught in a tidal wave, his body fumbling backwards and out of control, unable to resist the force that was pressing it. Josh felt his head hit the metal floor again, but his fingers clutched tight around the pistol. In the haze of the hit, he heard a series of explosions, assuming they were Wrex's grenades. Once the biotic push wore off, Josh found his footing, slightly off balance with his aim. The further side of the hall where the asari were shooting from was covered in smoke now, yet a barrage of bullets was still coming from that direction.

Without any hesitation, he rushed forward against the wall, finding his own strength. A loud roar from the krogan battle master told Josh that something was about to happen. As the smoke cleared, Wrex's gigantic shape was already rushing full speed at one of the asari. Josh pulled a quick stasis over her, all the while firing at the other one to keep her in cover. He could see the radial blue ripples in Wrex's kinetic barriers, but relied on the battle master to make it out alive.

At the final moment before a brute reptilian shape collided with the slender asari one, Josh let go of the biotic stasis. Wrex's eyes flared in the usual violent red as the light green orbs of the asari lost any aesthetic appeal, fear crawling into her. The slender commando disappeared, trampled and run over by a giant warrior, but the momentum took Wrex further. The remaining commando leaned from the corner, taking careful aim.

Josh thought back to his days of pee wee baseball and tugged at the grenade on his belt. The pierced shoulder made the throw a pain, but he still did it. As the asari took aim, she felt a slight tag on her back side, her finger relaxing off the trigger momentarily. That was all Josh needed to press the remote grenade detonator. Another cloud of smoke filled the halls.

With his gun on the ready, and slightly favouring his left foot Josh made his way forward, left side dragging on the wall. He stopped in his tracks, seeing a familiar shape sliding on the floor towards him tumbling, helpless, and out of control. Josh made a move to avoid it, and immediately felt a force pulling at him, tearing at him, removing his control. A biotic Alliance soldier did not need an explanation of what it felt like to be affected by a biotic singularity – helpless.

A slender asari shape, this one not dressed in an armour suit but rather favouring maroon dress, with a shallow cut around the chest, walked out of the shadow of the smoke. She moved confidently towards Josh, her smile multiplying by the second. With the side of his eye, the ex-Alliance soldier saw Wrex's body wiggle slightly, the krogan's hand slowly clutching for his pistol at the hip.

As the asari got closer, she began to speak, "I knew that coward would send someone after all. I expected a krogan, but I never expected a human. Even the Shadow Broker should know not to trust your kind too easily."

"I just needed some cash," Josh tried to gain control over his body, the singularity constraining him even harder, leaving him helpless, "hired by the krogan. Couldn't give a fuck about the Shadow Broker."

"Trying to save your life is useless," the asari gave a wicked grin. "It is already quite forfit."

Wrex twitched again, this time inching himself closer to the asari, using only one hand.

"Everyone begs differently," the asari mused, as much to herself as too Josh, "but they all die all the same."

The krogan moved faster than Josh expected anyone of that size to be able to. Wrex's giant mass leapt up to his feet, his one hand grabbing the diplomat around her neck while the other putting a pistol to her temple. Wrex gave a coarse laughter of satisfaction that could have as easily been mistaken for a grunt of pain.

"The Shadow Broker says hello," Wrex's deep baritone rung in the asari's ear.

"It's a shame I won't get to say it back," the asari released the singularity, allowing Josh to regain control over his body. Her hand shot down, tapping at something at her hip. A muffled explosion rung deeper inside the hallways.

Wrex's finger pressed the trigger as soon as the first explosion cleared the sound barrier. The asari diplomat's pretty face was no more, and what remained of it was splattered on the tunnel walls. Just as her body graciously slid down to the floor, the first flicker of the explosions made its way down the hallway. Josh scrambled up to his feet while Wrex took a picture with his omni-tool. In seconds both were running.

The excruciating heat at their backs did not allow them to stop for just one second, but neither of them wanted to. Josh felt the pressure on his injured leg as well as the burning sensation in his shoulder, both amplified by what was behind him. As the door came into view, Wrex tossed three of his grenades at once, activating the detonation as soon as they touched the cold steel. The door blew outwards, creating a small opening, still not sufficient enough for either off them.

The battle master's gargantuan shape slammed into the opening, the hole letting half of his body through, the other half still on the other side. Josh did not allow himself too much of a delay, putting all of his force behind Wrex and giving his body a small push forwards as well. The explosion was the final factor. He felt his back burning up and his suit heating up over the unacceptable temperatures, but then he felt nothing but cold.

Wrex's coarse laugh echoed through the surface seconds after. The krogan was lying in the ice, a few meters away from Josh, his face inside a snowbank. The reptilian got himself up and turned. There was nothing but black smoke and fire coming out of what used to be a base. With one quick motion, Wrex swept Josh up as well.

"You're not half bad human," he said after he was done laughing, "you're not half bad."