Chapter 12: The Worst That Could Happen
Saturday 2140.
Four months and one week after.F.B.
A bit later on the same evening, things had settled down a bit. Most of the battalion was sprawled around the big couch area. Even the card players had seemingly lost interest in their game and had joined the round. Either that or Grinder and Doc had no more Lien for Bonkers to win. Yang was sitting in the middle of the biggest couch, not by choice though. She quickly came to realize that choice was something evidently missing when around Brush. The overeager faunus had essentially shoved Yang right into the center of attention. That was alright, the blonde supposed. She was the new one after all. Everyone was more or less engaged in conversations, except for Velvet who was sitting in the only armchair, entertaining her drink.
As the conversations went dry for a bit Yang dove in with a question, she had in her head for a while.
"So … how did the rest of you come up with your new names?"
Having heard Mouser explain his and Brush's earlier, she was curious about the rest of the 7th.
"Well, you are clearly directing this question to my fellow comrades in arms here, since you surely know how I got mine."
Yang turned her attention to the speaker. Grinder was rather young looking, in his early twenties at most, even though his meticulously trimmed mustache was clearly trying, and failing, to make him look older. He was flaxen-haired with clearly above average looks. And unfortunately, he seemed to know it. Everyone else was just rolling their eyes, Hacks even going so far as to let out an amused 'Here we go again'. Of course, none of that actually helped Yang who was oblivious to how the guy got his name.
"Actually … I have no idea. Should I?"
Grinder looked honestly shocked as everyone else burst into laughter.
"But Yang … you wound me. A young woman like you clearly must have heard of the one and only Grinder! I am quite famous in my particular scene if I do say so myself."
"Yeah, and you have to say so yourself cause no-one else does." Hacks managed to squeeze that jab out between laughs and earned clinking glasses with Mouser for her effort. Yang just tilted her head and gave Grinder another look over, but she could not place the guy anywhere.
"Sorry. Never heard of you."
Grinder just sank into the couch he was sharing with Butch, looking utterly defeated. Yang was feeling sorry for the guy and was about to say something before Bonkers interjected.
"Oh shush you drama queen. Just because you got to stream over the CCT for like two hundred people at max and won some tournaments against fourteen-year-old kids doesn't mean you're a star, man. He's a pro gamer, Yang. Grinder's just his gamer tag, and he insisted on keeping it to, and I quote, 'protect his brand'."
Grinder perked up at that. "Brand awareness is everything. Everything!"
As Grinder fell into a passionate rant about the importance of nurturing one's brand and fame, seemingly oblivious to the fact that nobody was listening to him, Yang turned to Bonkers. She remembered Coco telling her that the guy had spent the last years in a mental ward and she did not know what she expected after hearing that, but it was undoubtedly not what she got. For all intents and purposes, Bonkers was … normal. And not normal in comparison to a room full of soldiers, just normal. If she had encountered him in the street, she would have forgotten him two steps later. Or one step later probably. He was of average height with an average looking hair cut, brown hair, brown eyes and the most outstanding recognizable feature he had were that he had no identifiable features. At all. Even his voice and way of talking was boringly uninteresting.
"And what about you, Bonkers? Where does yours come from?"
"Well, that should be rather obvious. I am, per definition of the Vale medical faculty, insane. So the name came with the territory." He offered Yang a sincere smile, and the Brawler suspected that he was used to reactions like hers. "You're wondering why people think I am nuts."
"Well … I … yes, but I didn't want to be rude … "
Bonkers just dismissively waved at her. "Don't worry about it. I get it all the time. Besides I love to tell people about it because quite frankly I like the validation it gives me." He smiles brightly at Yang. "In essence, I was under the belief that there is a great threat out there that can control Grimm and is trying to use mythical artifacts and magic right out of old fairy tales to overthrow the hunter academies because they were hiding things from the public and even the government. Sounds familiar?"
Yang stared at him for a second.
"Wait, you're telling me that they declared you insane because you were too close to the truth?"
He just laughed at that. "Oh no. I am telling you that I was close to the truth. I was declared insane by my lawyers to prevent me from spending my life in prison after I tried to prove my views by blowing a hole into Beacon Tower."
Yang's eyes went wide, and everyone chuckled at that. Brush silently bumped into her right side in an attempt to get her out of her initial shock.
"Worry unnecessary. Bonkers mental state nominal. Methods questionable. Presenting no danger to fellow comrades. Exception Card Games. Cheating highly likely." Recognizable by his unusual way of speaking, Doc joined the conversation. He had short, graying hair and a black horn-rimmed glasses. Even though he was clearly the oldest of the group and the designated doctor, he was as well muscled as everyone else. Except for Butch, of course, that faunus was a tank. "For Clarification. Designation 'Doc' obvious by occupation. Leadership lacking creativity."
"Hey!" From Yang's left Mouser seemed to take offense to that statement. "I assume you mean Shades by that!"
"Positive. Risking alcohol access not worth objecting."
"You know it." Mouser smiled smugly. "You see, Yang, nobody here is really creative with the names. But we still got it better than Sly and Gadget. I mean Shades came up with all the names for her team and look how bad they are: Sly just because his name's Fox and Gadget since she's our tech gal. Shades because of those damn glasses of hers and Big O just means Big One, 'cause you know he was so tall."
Yang did not miss the twitch that went through Velvet as she heard Mouser mention Yatsuhashi. The rabbit faunus immediately took a long sip after that. Fox seemed to watch Velvet as well, or whatever his equivalent to that was, but only for a moment before he addressed Mouser.
"Keep on believing that those are the meanings of the names. Spares us all some embarrassment." Before Mouser could ask what exactly Fox was getting at, the blind man pointed his finger directly at Yang. "Right now, however, the most important is to figure out what your name shall be, Xiao Long."
Yang suddenly felt the eyes of everyone on her as everybody starts murmuring and discussion amongst themselves. Yang started to feel uncomfortable, but before anyone could say anything, a short, mocking laugh echoed through the room.
"Why bother? She's a waste of time anyway."
The room went abruptly silent as Velvet spoke, getting everyone's attention. The faunus kept quiet since her earlier outburst, and although she had been drinking all evening, her voice seemed clear. Her brown eyes drilled themselves into Yang, and there was no doubt that Velvet meant what she said.
"Gadget …"
"Shut it, Sly. I am sick of sitting here, with her, pretending nothing happened in Patch."
Fox tried again. "What happened in Patch was not her fault …"
Velvet was having none of that. Without losing eye contact with Yang, she interrupted Fox. "Oh but it was, and you know it, don't you, Xiao Long. Yes, you didn't kill him directly, but you killed him none the less. All because you're useless. Beacon broke you. I mean look at yourself. I watched you train with Sly. It's honestly quite pathetic."
The pure venom in Velvet's voice hit Yang hard. She broke eye contact and looked down at her stump. Her whole body started shaking.
She's right …. She's right …. So right ….
Mouser and Fox both stood at the same time, glaring at Velvet. Yang felt someone, probably Brush, hug her gently from the side as if to protect her. Velvet herself was on her feet now too, her eyes not leaving Yang as she addressed the others.
"Just look at that! Shaking like a leaf! And Brush has to protect her like she's her mother. We're soldiers! This is a war! How can you let someone in who can't even protect you? Who is so weak that you all have to protect her! She's a liability, who will get us all killed like she got Yatsu killed!" Velvet had made her way to Yang's couch. She was practically looming over her and Brush now. "I mean just look at her arm, or rather lack thereof. It's clear she can't even protect herself!"
"That's enough, Sergeant!"
Velvet broke eye contact with Yang as Mouser's voice boomed through the building. She had to look down at the small mouse faunus, who now stood between Yang and herself.
"And here I thought we aren't allowed to use rank, sir."
Mouser did not seem amused one bit, in fact, nobody else seemed to be, as the silence between the two stretched on. Even the sound system in the background decided to switch to a foreboding tune.
"You're out of line. I suggest you leave the Private alone and wait for me outside." His tone made it clear that this was less a suggestion and more so an actual order. Velvet just shrugged and emptied her glass.
"Fine by me. Wasn't in a party mood anyway." She set her glass down with more force than necessary and walked out the entrance without another word.
Mouser watched the exit for a few heartbeats before slowly exhaling and turning his attention to Yang. "Are you alright, Yang?"
Yang did not answer. She was too busy struggling to keep herself from grumbling.
Get a grip, keep it together! Yes, she's right, but you're here to change that. Remember what Coco said, you can be useful, you WILL be useful. Don't give in now or you'll prove her point! You're better than that. They all want you here, they showed as much tonight, but you can't hide behind them. Prove her wrong. Prove her WRONG! You NEED to be right!
Mouser held his gaze on Yang for a few moments, as she was still shivering in Brush's arms.
"Right. That looks like a no. Brush, stay with her. Doc, see if you can do something. I fear Gadget might have triggered some lingering trauma. I'll go and talk to …." He stopped as he felt a hand gripping his arm. He looked around to see Yang being the one who halted him.
"I'll talk to her."
Yang's voice came out as barely more than a whisper, but there was no doubt that everyone had heard her.
"I am not sure if that is …"
"No, Major. Sir. The Sergeant got a problem with me and me alone. So I should be the one to fix it. If you tell her to stop, it'll be just an order. It won't change anything. I need to be the one to do it. I got to fix this."
Yang looked up at Mouser. Lilac eyes filled with determination locked with Mousers skeptical gray ones. A few moments later Mouser nodded and stepped aside.
Velvet was leaning against the side of the bungalow, next to the door. Arms crossed, one foot angled against the wall, back flat on the wooden surface. She had half a mind just to stomp off and call it a night. A rather crappy night, but the prospect of an even worse morning with Mouser and Coco throwing tantrums kept her waiting to get an earful from the Major. Even though she was not particularly forward to it.
Shouldn't have gotten drunk you fool. Wait, scratch that, should have gotten more drunk. I'm not at a stage where I could have used alcohol as an excuse. Still, I could have been smarter about it. Facts or not, now I triggered some bullshit pity party, and I can't win against that. Whatever, let's just get this over with.
When she heard the door open, Velvet did not even wait for the arrival to come out and speak.
"Let's spare us the lecture and just skip to the part where you tell me what that stunt will cost me so we can both do something pleasant with the rest of this evening, Mouser."
"Well, I don't know if this will be pleasant, but it won't be a lecture at least."
Velvet whirled around fast, getting herself into a more defensive position. She narrowed her eyes at Yang, ready for any move from the blonde. But nothing like that happened. Yang was just standing there, a few feet away and in a seemingly relaxed pose. She was staring back at Velvet, not at all timid and weak as before, but not aggressive either. Just starring back, waiting.
"Whatever," Velvet snorted, "I don't need this."
As she turned and started to walk away, Velvet was stopped by a response she did not expect.
"You're right about me, you know? Beacon broke me. I am about as useless as the old Vale police. And because of that, I killed Yatsu."
Velvet's hand curled into fists. She turned towards Yang angrily.
"Don't you dare talk about him! You have no right …."
"Yes, I don't have the right. And no, I've got every right. I have no right because I failed him. And he's not the only one I failed. I failed my dad and my dog who died because I was stuck at home, wallowing in my pain. I failed my sister, twice, first because I could not go with her since I was hugging my bed. And the second time back at Beacon because I got manipulated enough to snap at a defenseless fighter, so I was confined to my room and not there for her when the attack happened. I failed the rest of my team and everyone else, including you and Yatsu, that day because of the same reason. So yes, I don't have the right. Then again, I do have the right because I am trying to own those failures. I can never make them right, but I can try to better myself because of them, be useful again, for everyone else. That's why I am here. That's why I've accepted Coco's offer. I don't want to repeat these failures."
Velvet huffed unimpressed. "Nice speech. Then again, it's easy to say you won't repeat failures because if you would, you'd need someone to spoon feed you." She mockingly wiggled her right arm, as if it was necessary to elaborate what she meant.
"You're wrong. Maybe not about me being able to not repeat my failures. But you're wrong about the arm. That was not a failure. It was the only thing I know that I did right."
Velvet could not help but laugh at that. "Are you serious? You're telling me you wanted to lose that arm, is that it?"
"Of course not." Yang's voice was steady; it annoyed Velvet a bit that her words did not have the desired effect. She wanted that girl to feel her pain. "There's not been a day where I hadn't wished it didn't happen. That I could just have my arm back. But I never regretted it. You were right back there that I could not protect myself when I lost my arm. But it was not because I am a failure, it was because the other option was unacceptable."
"Riiight and what would that had been? Getting your hair entangled?"
"Blake dying."
Velvet was taken aback by that. Her mocking grin fell off her face almost instantly. It was not even the substance of that statement but the way Yang delivered it. The weight behind those two words was somehow more than apparent to Velvet. Everything about Yang changed with those words, her voice became low and weak, her shoulders slumped a bit, and it was painfully obvious to see that she had trouble maintaining eye contact with the faunus. The tone of the conversation suddenly became very different because of it and Velvet, for all her intents and reasons to do so, had trouble maintaining her hateful attitude.
"It was after you, and the others took down those paladins, and the Atlas robots had shut down. I caught up with all of you in the courtyard and asked Weiss where Blake was, remember?" Velvet could do nothing more than nod to that, momentarily enticed by the story. "I found her in the cafeteria. Or rather, I heard her anguished scream. As I looked over, I saw … him. His sword was rammed into Blake's stomach … I had to get him away from her … stop him from attacking again … anything. So I threw myself at him, with everything I got. It was a dumb move; I knew that my aura was low from all the fighting I had to do even to get there. But I didn't care. I had to stop him from hurting her."
Yang fell silent; her left hand clasped around the stump of her arm. Velvet remained quiet as well; she had not expected to deal with something like that today.
"He was hurting the woman I … well … I guess I did love her back then. I doubt I knew it at the time, not really, but it was rather obvious since then. So I saw red. I flared my semblance as much as I could, screamed, charged with a full blast … I guess I tried to get his attention? So he would stop hurting her? Or maybe I was just not thinking at all; I don't know. It didn't matter anyway. He cut through my arm like it was nothing, and everything went black. Then I woke up in a hospital and my arm was gone. Weiss was there … at least for a while until her father arrived. I asked her what happened to Blake. Blake wasn't there, so I thought I failed. That the guy wiped me out and then killed her. That I failed. But Weiss told me she saw her, that Blake got me out of there and to safety. And that she's fine."
"Why wasn't she there with you?" Velvet's tone was neutral, almost emotionless. Yang took a few seconds to answer.
"Sun told us that Blake ran. Got herself patched up a bit and took off. No one knew why."
"She just … abandoned you? After you lost your arm for her?"
Yang visibly bit her lip and Velvet could have sworn that she saw the blond girl start to shake briefly.
"It doesn't matter … not anymore. I just wanted to tell you … honestly, I don't really know what I wanted to tell you. I guess I just want you to know that I don't walk around here as if nothing happened. I know what happened. And I know what I did. Where I failed. I wanted to sit in my bedroom until I am old and gray but my dad and the village didn't let me … and now they're dead. I don't know if Coco felt the same about me or if it was pity or guilt for beating me up … but she gave me another chance. This chance. And I want to make the most of it. And I know you're in pain. And angry. But I hope you could give me a chance to prove that I want to own up to what happened. And if I blow it … well, then you were truly right and can hate me. I hate myself already so yeah, two is company?"
Velvet stood silent for a while. There was a lot of turmoil in her. The last days she was so convinced that Yang was the reason for all her pain, that her anger clung to that thought. But now … she could not do it anymore. She did not really know why. It was sad what happened to Yang but so what? She had her fair share of sadness and pain too! Besides Yang could be lying. Still, Velvet could not keep her anger up. Could not hold on to the one thing that kept her going again.
Damnit! What is wrong with me! She's right there! She's responsible for all of it! She's the reason! I have to hate her! I NEED to hate her! … WHY can't I hate her … I don't understand. I … urgh! Fuck all of it!
"Urgh! I need a drink. Come on Xiao Long; I'm buying."
Yang blinked twice in confusion as Velvet walked past her towards the entrance to the LZ. She was not sure what exactly this turn of events meant, and her mouth blurted out the first thing that came to her head. "I thought we didn't need to pay for the drinks?"
Velvet just laughed at that and looked over her shoulder. "You're a bigger fool than I thought if you think that Mouser and the rest won't make me pay for my outburst earlier. No, come on, or I'll start without you."
Yang nodded and hurried after Velvet. With all that happened today, drinks did sound like a marvelous idea.