A/N: It's been a hectic time for me. I'm trying to get my creative brain to restart, but between the alien unit eating my brain and taking care of my mother post-knee replacement surgery, I haven't been able to write like I usually do. It's driving me nuts.

So, thanks for your patience, especially in regards to my other stories.

Edward liked lists, Bella thought, bemused. One of his more endearing qualities.

Bella flipped through the pages of the legal pad he'd left for her. She'd had no clue where to begin looking for a lawyer in Texas. Lawyers in general—needing a lawyer at all—intimidated her. She had no idea how to browse for one.

Edward had lists upon lists. A list of forums and other sites where he could find recommendations and personal testimonies. A list of the names that stuck out from all his perusing. After that were pages with the name of a lawyer and a list of positives and negatives—everything written out in his pretty, neat script.

Moving her fingers over the sloping, looping letters, Bella thought about how Mac would never get the chance to learn cursive. She had a vision—Edward and Mac leaning toward each other over the kitchen table as he showed her the alphabet in cursive.

She shook her head, rubbing a hand over her eyes. What an idyllic, little-girl fantasy. Even the image of her daughter was almost hundred percent fiction. Liam had begrudgingly sent her photos, but that was all she had. She had no idea how Mac moved, how small she really was. She hadn't seen her daughter since she was a chubby, tottering baby.

And Edward, well…

Fate had a sense of humor. After years of only surviving, her mind had run away with too many impossible daydreams. As if it weren't enough to have hope that she might have her daughter back in her arms. She'd had to go and fall for her husband and his tired, beautiful green eyes.

She hadn't been able to shake the idea he'd wanted to kiss her as much as she wanted to kiss him at the beach. She'd forgotten, for a sweet space of time, that their marriage was an act. She'd turned around, seen him watching her with a smile on his face that smacked of adoration and genuine pleasure.

The laptop chimed, and Emmett's Facebook photo flashed briefly on the screen with a message. Bella opened up messenger.

Emmett: Say, uh, fella. I know a guy, who knows a guy, who knows a guy. Interested?

Bella snickered.

Bella: In English?

Emmett: I pulled some strings. If you want him to, Marcus Russo will take your case.

Bella almost choked. Marcus Russo appeared on everyone's list of top family attorneys. He was expensive—the kind of attorney the villain in those kinds of movies always had to make the situation all but impossible for the heroine.

Did that make Bella the villain?

Bella: How the hell does a defense attorney in California know a family attorney in Texas?

Emmett: Weren't you paying attention? I know a guy who knows a guy and so on…Or, I just shot him an email, one professional to another, and he agreed to take on an asshole like that is worth a discounted rate. Lawyers are drama queens. We like the idea of taking down a big fish or a big asshole no matter what kind of law we practice.

Bella dug the heels of her hands into her eyes, overwhelmed. Again.

Things kept going right. That just hadn't been the pattern of the last few years of her life.

She breathed in and out deeply, fighting to keep her hope under control. This could happen. This really could happen. Her fingers shook as she typed out a reply.

Bella: I really don't know how to thank you.

Emmett: Fuhgedabout it. ;) I'll set up a Skype meeting for when you and your hubby are both off work.

For minutes, Bella sat at the kitchen table with her head in her hands, trembling. She breathed in wheezes, gritting her teeth against a sense of giddy anticipation. She remembered her daughter's warm weight on her hip. Just yesterday, Mac had giggled at something Bella said. She imagined the sound of her laughter filling the room. She could almost hear the pitter-patter of little feet, too fast and too uncoordinated, running through the house. She imagined another day at the beach, scooping Mac up before she could run out too deep in the water; admonishing her to come put on sunscreen first.

She thought about Edward there with her, with both of them. Picking Mac up when her legs got tangled. Putting her on his shoulders at the beach.

Daydreams coalesced into tangible thoughts. She could feel that future; she could taste it.

She needed it.

At some point, before she could tamp down the euphoria, the door from the garage opened. Bella stood on shaking legs and darted across the room, throwing her arms around Edward's neck.

"Whoa," he said. His hand came up automatically, pressing against her back.

"Sorry," Bella mumbled, though she couldn't get her arms to cooperate. She only clutched him tighter, gasping again. Her throat was closed off, and she was breathless with emotion. "It's just… I love…" Her words choked, rationality kicking in a split second before it was too late. "I love your brother." She ducked, hiding her face against his shoulder. She still hadn't let him go.

"Oh." Edward chuckled lightly, rubbing her back in slow circles. "Well, I feel like I have to warn you. Rosalie is fierce. I think you could take just about anyone in a fight, but Rose might be a bit of a challenge. I'm not sure Emmett is worth it."

Bella laughed and raised her head. "Sorry. Your brother got Marcus Russo to take the case in our budget."

Edward's eyes went wide, and he smiled. "That's fantastic." He pulled her close again, hugging her tightly. To her surprise, he lifted her up off her feet and spun her around. Bella laughed, holding on to him.

When he set her down, he took her face in his hands.

And the world went still.

The giddy euphoria thrumming just under Bella's skin went red hot. Her hands had settled on his shoulders. Edward's smile fell into an open mouthed 'o', and he sucked in a soft breath. His eyes searched hers, and her heart began to pound. She tilted her chin up in a tentative invitation.

His breath huffed out, wafting warm over her face. He leaned down. Their lips brushed—a barely-there touch. Bella shivered. He sighed and moved that fraction of an inch, pressing his mouth to hers. He took her top lip between both of his. Bella slid one of her hands to cup the back of his neck.

Edward shifted. His hands brushed down her sides to her waist. He spread one hand wide at the small of her back as his lips lined up with hers. She cocked her head, meeting each movement of his. He made a soft noise that vibrated against her mouth. She swayed in place, and he stepped her backward. One step. Two. Three. Then, her back was against the counter and his hands were on either side of her.

He was there one moment. Then, with a gasp, he was gone. He pulled away. Bella's head automatically followed a few inches until she realized his body heat was gone from her personal space. She opened her eyes to find he was a few feet away. His eyes were closed, and he had his fist pressed against his temple.

"I'm sorry," he said quickly. "I didn't… I'm sorry."

Bella's heart twisted, still beating too hard. "Okay." She swallowed hard. "For what?"

He took a steadying breath and opened his eyes. He took a step forward, tentatively reaching out to take her hand in a loose hold. "I want you to feel safe here."

The heavy anticipation of rejection lifted, and Bella had to struggle not to smile too wide. She wound her fingers tighter around his and pulled him toward her. She pressed a soft kiss to his chin. "I do feel safe here." She slid one hand around him, spider crawling her fingers along his back. "You think I could do this if I didn't feel safe here?"

His eyes met hers. He raised a hand, running the back of a single knuckle down her cheek. It was all the signal Bella needed. She pushed onto her toes and kissed him.

Whatever qualms he'd had just a moment before disappeared. He engulfed her, his kiss hard. His rubbed up and down her back before he took a hold of her waist. Bella gasped into his mouth as he lifted her up onto the counter. She wrapped her legs around him. He cupped one hand around her thigh, the other was warm on her back, under her shirt. She tangled her fingers in his hair, reveling in the taste of him, the feel of him.

Minutes later, when their kiss broke, they were both breathless. Bella took his face between her hands, staring into his eyes with wonder. They were a green she'd never seen—sparked and alive, dark with want. "Whoa," she said.

He was beautiful. "Yeah," he whispered, a hand pressed over hers.

Her words were all tangled up, confused—all the things she should want warring with all the things she was so afraid to wish for. Her life was unrecognizable from what it had been only weeks before. She'd had so little, but all the things she held in her hands now would kill her to lose.

So she didn't speak. She leaned in and kissed him again, softer this time. Sweet but serious. She hoped he could feel all the things she couldn't say in the way her lips and hands moved on him.

~0~

A few days passed. They didn't really talk about the change in the air between them—as though words might break the spell. They kissed goodbye when one or both of them went to work. They touched more, as though feeling their way through intimacy. His fingers found hers when they passed by each other. They watched a movie, cuddled on the couch, and she traced the lines of his palms with lazy strokes.

They kissed. A lot. Serious kisses that left them all tangled up in each other.

There was a strange dichotomy to the whole situation for Bella. There was the thrill of a new connection. What was happening between them wasn't a fleeting thing. They were two shattered people, filling in pieces of each other—becoming a solid us in every sense of the term.

As much as Bella would have loved to swath herself in him, to let these beautiful minutes and hours they stole be only about them, she was pulled into a separate, singular battle. Everything about this new intimacy was tactile. Edward didn't simply touch her; he caressed her, and that aroused sensations Bella wasn't familiar with anymore.

This body had betrayed her, had wracked her with pain. It had stopped functioning the way a body should. As their touches became more sexually charged, Bella was surprised to remember her body was also capable of intense pleasure. She'd forgotten that, rather than just sending spectacular pain shooting through her, her nerve endings could make every inch of her skin aware. Ache could be delicious—the coil of her taut nipples hardening when his fingertips tickled her belly, the internal scream of desire to take him inside her.

Her body, like the rest of her, had slowly stepped away from the cliff of actively dying. For a time, it had done nothing but existed—gone on. Now, it was slowly coming alive again. So Bella was coming to know her own body, new in so many ways, even as she explored Edward's.

Marcus Russo's second call caught them while Edward was changing out of his work clothes. As such, they had ended up on his bed, with the laptop between them, heads bent together as they listened to their new lawyer.

"The write-up you sent me gave me a much better grasp of the situation, Mrs. Swan." Marcus stroked his chin, nodding. "The timing will have to be figured just right. Would you be able to be in Texas for a few weeks?"

Bella's breath caught. Being near her baby...surely if she was there, Liam would have to let her see Mac. Still, she couldn't ignore the expense implied. Plane tickets. Hotels. Transportation. Meals. She couldn't afford any of it.

Edward took her hand and squeezed. "It's doable," he assured both Marcus and Bella.

"Good. I'm sending you a list of things I'll need. Statements from your doctor, Mrs. Cullen. Pictures. A list of people from your life both before and after your illness. And there's a questionnaire for both of you." He steepled his fingers, looking at them. "This is a unique case for many reasons, not the least of which is you're seeking to remove this child from the Texas system entirely. Most of custody law is an ongoing battle in the same arena, but for us, we're trying to win this in one shot—bring the war, so to speak, to your home turf.

"That's why my questions for you, and the things I'm going to ask of you, must be exceedingly thorough. I'm going to ask you not to take offense to some of the questions I ask, and the things I'll want you to do. It's my job to try to tell the future—what may be problematic to your case and what will be a benefit. Parents fight dirty when it comes to their children. The best way I can help you is if I know everything.

"Texas is a red state, so don't let your California state of mind get in the way. We have a few things working in our favor in that respect. It's good that you're already married and not just cohabitating."

Edward and Bella exchanged a glance. Bella's hand had gone clammy in Edward's grip.

"You present a cohesive family unit. It's the kind of nice picture a judge wants to have in his or her head when they decide on primary custody—that the child will have an example other than a broken home." Marcus frowned. "Then again, abortion is also an emotional issue."

Bella flinched.

"There are those whose view on abortion is limited only to the so called irresponsible, promiscuous stereotype. A child as a punishment for shameful deeds." Marcus's tone remained neutral as he spoke. "Those types will make an exception for rape, incest, or when the life of the mother is on the line, as is the case here. But, there are also those who believe as your ex-husband believes. It's a mother's privilege to lay her life down for her child. If you would step in front of a bullet to save McKenna, why would you not let a disease take you if it meant your child would live?"

Beside her, Edward made a noise low in his throat. Bella squeezed his hand now, ignoring the way her stomach was churning.

Marcus put his hands up in a placating gesture. "As I said. These are simply realities we must be prepared for. All things considered, you have a good case. Regardless of what you did, not many would agree with Liam's reaction to the situation. Let's reconvene after you've had time to go over my list, and we'll come up with a game plan."

They disconnected the call and Bella pushed the laptop away. She didn't notice she was trembling until Edward put an arm around her.

"Hey, it's going to be okay," he whispered, stroking her hair.

She couldn't answer at first. She ducked her head instead, hiding her face at his neck. She didn't cry, but she shook hard. Edward held her, rubbing her hands up and down her back.

"This is so much," Bella said when she could speak again.

"You've got this." He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

"I'm not talking about me." She raised her head, resting a hand wide against his chest as she looked into his eyes. "It's the money, and the time. Some asshole digging into your life, your business. It's too much to ask."

His eyes were tender and warm as he looked back at her. He cupped his hand around the back of her neck. "You didn't ask." He leaned in, the tip of his nose bumping hers. "If you're asking me why you...I don't know. Because you were in front of me. Because I could." He hooked a hand around her thigh, bringing her leg across his lap. He took her hand and put it to his chest. "Do you feel this?"

Bella's heart pounded as hard as his was beneath her palm, but she knew what he was really asking. She nodded, her eyes caught in his.

He curled his fingers around hers, bringing their joined hands to press against his cheek. "I offered you what I did because it felt right." He ducked his head, kissing her lips sweetly. "When I kiss you, it feels right. And good." His smile was sad. "Nothing in my life has felt right or good in a long time. That's all I know for sure."

There was a heaviness to his words that wasn't bad so much as it was simply present. That she'd fallen in love with this man didn't mean she knew him. She understood what he meant. She knew she loved him. Knew that kissing him felt good, and her life had been devoid of good for so long.

She pressed soft kisses along his jaw, wrapping her arms around his neck. He leaned into her, their kisses deepening, lengthening, until her back hit the mattress. She spread her legs wide, letting his body settle on her as she rubbed her knee along his side, getting him as close as he could be while their clothes were still on.

A thrill of desire went through her, and she arched up as it traveled from the tip of her head to the bottom of her feet. Every line of hers pressed into every line of his. She wanted him beneath her skin. It was a powerful urge. One that had her gasping into his mouth at the intensity of the sensation that rocked her body.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked, pulling back, panting.

"Yes." She cupped her hand around the back of his head, pulling him back down to her. "I just want to do this for a while." She kissed the tip of his chin. "Is that okay with you?"

He laughed, wrapping his arms around her and rolling them onto their sides. "Yes." He tangled his legs with hers. "I think I can manage that."

A/N: Reviews feed the muse! Just saying. ;)