*Alison*
"That was amazing" I said as she popped her head out from underneath the covers.
"How many times have you gone down on a girl?" I asked.
Olivia wiped her mouth with her hand then bit her lip.
She's so sexy, I can't believe she just went down on me.
It all happened so fast.
Like, really fast.
*2 hours earlier*
"Hi I'm Alison" I said sitting down.
"What are you doing?" She asked.
"What do you mean?" I replied sounding confused.
"No one ever talks to me here, I'm an outcast" she said quietly.
I looked at her and smiled.
"Not anymore darling"
"I'm Olivia" she said.
"I'm Alison" I said giving her my hand.
She shook my hand then grinned.
"What?" I said curiously.
She didn't answer, instead she let out a little laugh.
I started to smile and repeated myself.
"What!" I said this time a little more impatient.
She leaned in to me and said
"I'll tell you what I'm grinning about if you hang out with me tonight"
"Deal" I said opening my note-book.
I kept looking at her throughout the period. She looked up at me a few times. But I think she only looked at me because I'm looking at her. I can't help it. She's so beautiful, she looks exactly like Emily but only lighter, only smaller. She's not as perfect and nowhere near as beautiful as Emily but she's close.
As I was in the middle of staring at her neck, thinking of kissing it, the teacher called out my name.
"Alison?" Mr. Rudill said.
"What?" I said sounding confused.
"What's the answer?" He said.
Oh, did he ask me a question? I didn't even hear him.
"I don't know, sorry" I said sheepishly.
Olivia looked at me and laughed.
Awkward.
After class, we stopped at my locker than hers.
"I just need to get my text-book" she said bending down into her locker.
Oh fuck, I know I shouldn't look but I can't turn away. She's wearing yoga pants and it's hard not to look at a girls ass when she's wearing yoga pants.
What has gotten into me? Why can't I stop thinking about sex lately? Sex usedto be the last thing on my mind when I was with Emily. It was always about love.
But maybe, I'm feeling it at my age now, where all I wanna do is fuck. It's no secret that girls want sex just as much as guys do. I can't help control my hormones, it's apart of me that needs to be set free and lash out with desire. I'm not sorry.
I think Olivia knew I was staring at her ass because I didn't look away quick enough as she was getting up and she grinned again.
I feel pretty fucking stupid.
"Let's go" she said shutting her locker.
I stepped inside her house and was rushed by with a heat of warmth. Her house was tiny but cute. We went into her room and she shut her door.
"You have any siblings?" I asked.
"No" she said.
"Animals?" I asked.
"No" she said.
After a few moments of silence she said
"I have parents, but they're doctors and barley ever home"
I didn't know what to say, so I didn't respond.
"So, why were you laughing?" I asked sitting down at the end of her bed.
"I'm a lesbian" she said looking at me through her mirror "and so are you"
I got up and squeaked
"No I'm not"
"It's a gaydar thing, you're gay honey" she said smiling seductively.
Fuck, she's really hot.
I swallowed hard and sat back down on her bed. I didn't realize I was shaking till I felt her whole bed moving.
She turned around and faced me. I smiled at her awkwardly. She started to stretch and I could see her stomach.
I got up off her bed again and bam, we were in each other's bubbles and I was shaking. She grabbed both my arms.
"Why are you so fidgety" she said.
I put my hands on her back. Is this what I'm supposed to do? Where do they go? I kept putting my hands in different positions then I said
"You smell good"
She laughed "thank-"
"I want you" I interrupted.
She stared into my eyes and licked her lips.
I placed my hands on her hips and she put her mouth to my neck.
"Do you want me hear" she said quietly.
"Yes" I said urgently.
She started kissing my neck, I felt her tongue press against me then she started to suck my neck and I titled my head back. She slowly let her lips apart from my neck. She moved her mouth to my ear and whispered
"Do you want me here?"
I felt her hand move up my stomach and onto my bra
"And here?" She whispered again.
"Yes" I let out.
She put her hand underneath my bra and grabbed my boob. I felt her bit on my ear and then she started to kiss and lick my ear.
Oh fuck.
She took her hand out of my bra and placed her mouth right near mine.
She got closer and closer.
"Do you want me" she said then kissed me "here"
I smiled and we kept kissing.
Just as it started to get steamy she pulled away and it feels like there's a puddle in my underwear.
She pushed me down on her bed and I watched her take off her top.
Oh fuck.
Oh fuuuuck.
She sat on my lap and started kissing me. This time more faster and with some tongue smearing. She unhooked her bra and slowly removed it. I couldn't help but stare.
Like oh fuck. I'm so fucking wet.
I placed both my hands on her boobs and started to feel them while I was kissing her neck. She lifted myhead up and kissed me.
"Lay down" she said.
So I did.
She started to touch my vagina through my pants and I immediately went red. You could fucking feel how wet I was through my pants. And I'm wearing fucking jeans.
"And you said you weren't gay" she said smiling.
I didn't respond and she let out a laugh.
She lay on top of me and said
"Don't worry baby, that's so fucking hot" as soon as she said the word hot she pushed her hand into my pants and felt me through my underwear.
I started breathing heavier and she started to kiss me roughly.
Oh fuck. Now she's fingering me. And she's doing it so fucking good. I can't stop fucking moaning, now I'm screaming, she's going so fast, she's going so hard.
"Oh my god, oh my god, mmm" I let out.
She pulled up my top halfway through her finger fucking me session and was kissing my boobs. It feels so good. It feels so fucking good.
Once she pulled her fingers out, I wrapped my legs around each other and squeezed hard. I've never felt this feeling before.
"You're really fucking hot Alison" she said wiping her fingers on my stomach.
"You're beautiful" I said putting my hands through her hair.
Is this awkward? Was that weird? Do people do that during sex? Because she kind of gave me a smug confused face when I did that.
"What are you thinking about?" She said studying my face.
Now I'm thinking about fucking her.
"I wanna finger you" I said.
She laughed and said
"One second"
She started to unzip my jeans and pulled them right off. She went down to my thighs and started kissing me. She moved my underwear with her one hand and put her mouth to my vagina.
Holy fuck.
"That was amazing" I said as she popped her head out from underneath the covers.
"How many times have you gone down on a girl?" I asked.
Olivia wiped her mouth with her hand then bit her lip.
"I've been wit-"
Someone opened her door and as soon as I looked at the man staring at us I looked at Olivia, who's topless, and is on top of a girl, who has no pants on, and I immediately knew it was her dad. I sat up right away which made her sit up and he shut the door and walked away.
"Oh no. I thought they never come home?" I said.
Olivia looked annoyed and I regretted saying anything. She put on a hoodie from her closet and parted all her hair to one side.
"You should probably put your pants on and go" she said.
Oh. Well. I guess it was fun while it lasted.
I slipped my pants on and fixed my shirt.
I walked over to her and she opened her door. I tried to kiss her but she didn't respond back so I opened my eyes and bumped into her dad as I started to walk.
I quickly walked past him and then I heard the door shut and his voice.
"Why must you always bring a new girl into this home? Why don't you call us? Why don't you at least lock your door?" He said calmly.
Wow, he sure is handling this situation a lot different from my dad would.
"Call you? You guys are too busy and jee why do I need to? Couldn't you hear the noises?" I heard her yell.
Ohkay. I need to leave.
*Emily's side*
September 19,
It's a Thursday. I try not to communicate as much as I can. But today, I let it all out. At school. In front of everyone.
I hate being here. I hate it so much. I'm surprised I'm still capable of doing my work. I can't even think straight, maybe cause I never was.
As soon as the bell rang I opened up my locker and all my shit fell out.
"Fuck" I muttered.
Aria came over and started picking up my books.
"I got it" I told her.
She kept picking them up.
"I said I got it!" I yelled at her.
Aria got up and stared at me blankly, I felt the whole hallway go silent.
"What is your problem?" She asked me quietly.
"You wanna know what my problem is? My fucking problem is that I went to a party, I got fucking stabbed in the back, saw the love of my life almost get raped by a boy we've known since we were kids, and then she left me. She fucking left me without saying goodbye. I almost died for her, and she can't even saybye? I fucking loved her! I fucking love her! And she left me! She left me with nothing but this huge hole in my fucking chest! It's like I can't do anything. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't be happy, I can't smile, I can't do anything without her. I miss her so fucking much that it's killing me. How does someone have such a huge effect on me like this? How can a human make us feel on top of the world one day then the next day at the bottom? How can you fucking fall in love with someone then expect to move on? How am I supposed to live my life without her? I can't breathe without her. I hate her. I hate her so much. But I fucking love her" I explained in a rushed loud voice.
I know for a fact that every single person in this hallway heard me. I don't even care. I don't care what anyone thinks.
Aria tried to put her arm on me, I wouldn't let her. I took my books from her hand, put them in my locker, then ran out of that fucking building crying.
"Honey, what are you doing home? Is everything ok?" My dad asked me as I walked through the door.
"Oh" I said wiping my tears away "I didn't know you'd be home"
"Emy, what's wrong?" He said as he embraced me into a hug.
"It's Alison dad. I miss her, I miss her so much" I cried.
"I know. It's hard to lose a friend" he said.
I stopped hugging him.
"I loved her dad. I love her. She left me" I said choking on my words.
"I'm sorry" I mumbled.
"Honey, it's okay" he kissed my head.
I ran upstairs and cried myself till I fell asleep.
September 20th,
I can't believe I told my dad. He knows. He wasn't mad.
"Emily!" Travis yelled as he bumped into me.
Travis; Golden Sinera's favorite drug student.
"Get off me!" I said as I shoved him.
"Come here" he said grabbing me.
I let him drag me to a bush behind the school.
"So I heard what happened" he said sniffing.
"I don't care" I said.
He pulled a zip lock bag out of his hoodie and handed it to me.
"Their shrooms. It really helped me get over my girl. She really fucked me up. The only thing that helps me is those babies and a little other babies" he said dryly.
"I don't want this" I said staring at it.
"Emily, it helped me. It'll help you. Come over and I'll show you how to get those babies in you" he said.
"Right now?" I asked.
He nodded his head.
"Why are you going into Pizza Pizza?" I asked.
"To get pizza" he said.
He came out with a large pizza and a 2L of Coco cola.
10 minutes later we arrived to his house.
We went downstairs and I stepped on garbage bag and fell.
He laughed.
"Alright, give me the bag" he said opening up the pizza box.
I took out the baggie and handed it to him. He placed a shit load of them over the pizza.
"Am I gonna fucking die?" I asked.
"No" he said laughing.
I watched him eat two slices before I ate one.
It's fucking hard, it's fucking gross.
40 minutes later, Travis and I both started to laugh for no reason at the same time. I couldn't stop laughing. I saw a pumpkin in the corner of his TV and I tried to take the pumpkin out.
"What are you doing?" Travis asked laughing.
"The pumpkin! It's stuck!" I said.
I couldn't grab the pumpkin, either it's really heavy or it's really stuck.
I looked at Travis for help but he was swimming. Really fast. He kept moving his arms and kicking his legs.
"Go travis go!" I cheered.
I slowly sat down on the floor. Oh my! If I sat a little more to the left I would have fell down!
"Wait! Travis! Why is there a pumpkin stuck on your TV?" I said laughing.
"Wait. Have you ever stopped to think about your soul? Like what even is your soul? How can you have two bodies? How can people possibly think that when you die, your body leaves you. Like where the fuck does it go? McDonald's?" I said.
"Have you ever noticed dents on the ground outside? What if those dents are from year 100 or even earlier? Like wow" I said laughing.
"So if you get a tattoo will it stay on your body even after you die?" I said.
"Wait! What if you woke up one morning as a different person? What if all this is a dream? That we went through all this bullshit for nothing? What if when we die, we wake up as another person? Woah. Did I just discover new science shit or what?" I said clapping my hands.
Travis stared blankly at his TV screen for what seemed like an hour and just smiled.
"Doesn't your mouth hurt?" I kept asking and laughing.
He wouldn't answer.
Oh. I think I'm crying. There's tears on my face. I mean I think it's water because it's coming from my eyes. Why am I crying? Oh I know, I hate my life. I'm so depressed. Everyone leaves and I am a nobody. Ever since she left I have been broken. It sucks that the only person who can fix your heart is the person who broke it. Oh I'm so sad. I'm so sad. I want to die. I actually do. It feels like my whole body is about to explode. I hate living, I hate my life. I hate everything.
I started seeing things again. Little things. Big things. I think I saw a unicorn too. But then I fell asleep.
As soon as I woke up I started talking to myself.
"Where the fuck am I?"
"What time is it?"
"What day is it?" I said laughing.
I saw a person's head and I fucking jumped.
"Holy shit!"
Travis. Travis the druggie. Why am I with Travis the druggie? Oh my, what the fuck did I do?
Oh my god, I did mushrooms. With Travis the druggie.
"Shut up Emily!" Travis said throwing a pillow at me.
I found my phone. It's September 21st, 9 pm. How long have I been here? I have 5 missed calls from my dad and 6 text messages from my mom.
"Dad, hey. Sorry" I said into the phone "I'm coming home. I'll be home in ten minutes" I said hanging up.
When I got home I told my parents that I couldn't go to school because I had a huge assignment I forgot to do that day and I ended up working on it all the way till nine o' clock at night. They believed me.
*DISCLAIMER*
I am not writing about rape, alcohol, sex, and drugs for fun. I am writing about it because this is what actually happens to some people. This is life for a lot of people. I am writing this story, and one day I hope I can actually change some stuff around and the characters and actually publish this. I want people to know how bad it is to do drugs. I want people to know that you are not weak for the ways you've tried to kill your sadness. It's not like people decide one day that they want to do drugs and destroy their body. They do it because they think their life is so bad that drugs is the only thing that will help them.