Specialist Traynor flicked through her mountain of incoming messages, looking for any that were important enough to forward onto Commander Shepard or that needed her immediate attention. She checked the time on her terminal again, flustered at the notion that she and Shepard's relationship was about to be revealed to Dr T'Soni in a very blunt fashion. God, she's been up there for longer than an hour. It's going on two now. Pulling herself together, Sam tried to remember that she was doing this to help Shepard and continued her work, flagging incoming communications without really paying much attention. Suddenly an untitled email caught her eye. Hmm, I wonder what this is. Curious, and hoping it wasn't an unpleasant (and very petty) Cerberus attack, Samantha scanned the email with her self-developed virus scanner and then clicked 'open' and began to read.
Hayley, this is Mom...If I'm still allowed to call myself that. I hope I've caught you at the right address. Hell, it's been years! I haven't seen you since you were a little pup. Yeah...Anyway. Look kid, I need to see you. The entire Galaxy's talking a lot about you, saying you're first in line to be Reaper food or something. You're a big hero now, ain't ya? Unlike your dear old mom who's still wanted by C-Sec. I managed to hitch a ride to the Citadel after my ship got decimated with the rest of my crew back on Noveria. Got a new ID under the name Martha Hill. Come and find me. I'll be in an apartment on the Presidium. Number 606.
See ya kiddo.
Samantha froze. She read over the message again, trying to make sense of it. Shepard's mother? God, didn't she say her mother left her and her father when she was really young? Stunned, and wondering whether or not to believe it, Sam scanned the email again, trying to find its sent location. It was encrypted. Crap!
"EDI, can you try to break the encryption on this file, please? I can't seem to get around it."
"Right away, Specialist Traynor."
Samantha waited impatiently, her thoughts falling on Shepard. After their conversation on the Citadel she had rather gotten the impression that the Commander and her mother hadn't been on the best of terms. Should I tell her about this? It was a few minutes before EDI got back to her.
"I have broken the encryption, Specialist, but was unable to locate the source. I was prevented from going any further. It is what I believe organics call, 'a booby trap'."
Sam had to allow herself a giggle. EDI said 'booby'. Ha!
"Thanks EDI. Does it match up with any other known Cerberus links?"
"One moment...No."
"No?" Sam repeated, bewildered. She was expecting more of an answer than that. Surely this was a Cerberus ploy. Maybe they were planning something and needed a decoy, something to occupy Commander Shepard, one of the few who could stop them.
"That is correct," EDI replied in her smooth, sensual voice. "Would you like me to cross-reference the wording with my database of common Cerberus protocol?"
"Oh, no. That's quite alright," Samantha sighed. Maybe this message really was from Shepard's mother after all. If so she must be an expert at keeping her location anonymous. Suddenly Samantha's Omni-tool began to flash, signalling an incoming call from the Commander's private terminal.
"Shepard?"
"Actually, it is Liara," came the Asari's delicate tone. She sounded strange.
Oh no. Here it comes! The big old shit-storm I've been dreading.
"Is... everything alright, Dr T'Soni?" Samantha asked, trying to keep her voice even.
That's right, girl. Play it cool.
"Shepard is asleep," Liara replied calmly, "Though I was... unable to Meld for long enough to keep her fully sedated. She will wake soon. She's already a little restless."
Samantha swallowed nervously.
"Oh," she replied simply, knowing what Liara must have seen that made her stop so abruptly. The depths of Shepard's mind held many secrets, but surely the Asari hadn't expected anything like this. "Is there...anything I can do?" It was a while before Liara replied. For a second, Traynor thought the line had gone dead. "Dr T'Soni?"
"Yes, I am still here. I...Can you meet with me in the hall just off Shepard's cabin first? There is something I would like to talk about."
Samantha's stomach dropped. "Er...Yes, of course, Ma'am. I'll be right up."
Hanging up, she turned towards the elevator and climbed inside. As the lift ascended, Samantha began to feel a little uneasy. I bet she saw everything. Crap, why do I feel so bloody guilty? Taking a deep breath and bracing herself, Samantha stepped out onto the Commander's floor. Liara was standing waiting for her.
"Hi," Samantha greeted her awkwardly.
"Hello," Liara said softly, giving her a small smile.
An uncomfortable silence passed between them, neither woman knowing where to look.
"How's our girl?" Traynor asked then, unable to stand it any longer. She cringed instantly.
Our girl? Ugh, nice turn of phrase there, Samantha.
To her surprise, the Asari chuckled. "She is fine, considering. Though I think much of that has to do with you, rather than me."
Traynor blushed. "I...Yes, I suppose it does," she admitted, her stomach knotted with guilt. "Look, Liara—"
"You don't need to explain yourself, Specialist," Liara interrupted gently, giving her another smile. Clearly she didn't want to come across as jealous, but for some reason Samantha still felt like she had done something wrong. "I just...Well, I guess I do not really know what my intentions were with this conversation. But after what I just saw..."
Samantha was mortified. Oh Lord, what did she see? My naked body pressed against Shepard's? The two of us writhing in sync in the steamy mist of the shower? Christ!
"I'm sorry," Sam replied, not knowing why she was apologising but feeling like it was necessary.
"No, I am sorry," Liara replied sadly, "Sorry I ever turned my back on her. A part of me just thought that although Shepard was angry we could...maybe work things out. That she still had feelings for me."
Samantha was stunned. "I...I don't really know what to say," she breathed, taken aback.
Why is she telling me this?
"I will leave you be," Liara said sadly, "Shepard was asking for you moments ago as she dreamt. Her sleep is already becoming agitated unfortunately. She may have a headache when she wakes. I broke the Meld rather abruptly when...when..."
Samantha sighed. When she saw us having sex, she finished in her head.
"I should probably see if she's ok then," Sam replied, eager to end this conversation before it made her feel any shoddier. The look on Liara's face was actually breaking her heart a little.
"Of course," the Asari said then, pulling herself together. "Let me know if you need me again. I will always be there for her."
"I will," Samantha said, walking past her and opening the door to the Commander's room. "See you later, Dr."
"Goodbye."
When the door had closed behind her, Samantha walked across the cabin and exhaled, a little shook up by Liara's confrontation. The Asari wasn't unpleasant, and if anything she handled it well, but Traynor couldn't help shake the feeling that she was trying to plant some kind of doubt in her mind, that things between her and Shepard weren't quite finished. Or maybe it's just my insecurities talking. Either way, she didn't think she would be calling on the Asari again to look after the Commander, unless Shepard requested it herself.
As her eyes found Shepard sleeping soundly, sprawled in the middle of her bed on her back, above the blanket, with the cover swaddled around her on either side like a baby, Samantha smiled. Her heart warmed instantly and all thoughts of Liara went out the airlock. She had never seen the Commander look so vulnerable. Samantha lay down close beside her, fixing the ends of the blanket closer around Shepard's body, and leaned on her elbow staring down at her pretty face, running her hand gently through the woman's red hair.
Well, aren't you cute, she thought, suppressing a giggle. I bet even a Reaper would have second thoughts about waking you up right now.
The Commander's eyelids were fluttering wildly as she dreamt. She flinched a little then, fighting the enemy even in her sleep.
"Sssh," Samantha soothed, placing a light kiss on her forehead. "It's alright."
The muscles in Shepard's neck were flexing, her chest rising and falling rapidly making it seem like she was trapped in some kind of fever.
"Stop...NO!" she moaned, thrashing her head from side to side. Sam's face creased in concern as she watched the sheer distress register on the Commander's scarred face. Liara wasn't kidding. She's definitely restless. Traynor had to fight the urge to wake her up there and then, knowing that as hard as it was to bear, Shepard greatly needed any form of rest she could get. Instead, Samantha lay down beside her and wrapped a protective arm around her, trying to ignore the growing chill in the cabin's air. Feeling the heat of Shepard's body through the covers, and seeing a faint shine of sweat on her forehead and across her chest, Samantha thought about the message she had read before coming up. If it really was the Commander's mother contacting her, this would probably be yet another burden on top of an already troubled mind. Or it could help her manage her affairs before the final battle with the Reapers, Samantha thought then. Undecided, she buried her worries along with all knowledge of the message.
"Help!" Shepard cried, squirming under the covers as though trying to break free from a straightjacket, "You can't help me...Hayls, help...the fire...it burns...ARRGHH!"
A bloodcurdling yell tore from her throat and the Commander jerked out of her sleep, sitting bolt upright, eyes a wide flaming orange. She was wheezing like she'd run the length of Earth and back again.
"Shepard!?" Samantha gasped, having recoiled in surprise, startled, feeling her heart beat erratically.
Commander Shepard clutched her chest, heaving great mouthfuls of air. She turned to her left, seeing a shocked Samantha sitting upright beside her. Traynor touched her clammy face to let her know she was there, feeling the heat radiating off it. After several weary seconds, Shepard leaned in and collapsed against her bosom, exhaling with relief.
"Samantha..."
"I'm here!" Sam whimpered, leaning her chin on Shepard's head as the woman rested it against her body. "I've got you."
Feeling her tremble, Samantha lay back down slowly, bringing Shepard with her, trying to calm her. She put her arms around her, feeling that every muscle in the woman's body was on edge.
"Liara?" Shepard asked, not able to do much more than say her name.
"She's gone," Sam whispered, sliding her fingers through Shepard's hair affectionately. "It's alright."
"Good," the Commander breathed, "Don't...Don't make me do that again. I don't want to. I can't!"
"I won't," Sam replied, feeling terrible for the decision she had made earlier. She had thought it would help her but it clearly hadn't. She kissed the woman's head. "I'm sorry. I won't. I promise."
Shepard exhaled loudly then raised her head. As she stared, Sam noticed her eyes had thankfully returned to their normal green, thought the slight hint of orange still remained like always. She still didn't look fully awake or aware. Without saying another word Shepard found Samantha's mouth and began to kiss her intensely, as though only realising that she was there. Sam responded in kind and they were soon wrapped in a passionate embrace, enthusiastically tugging at each other's clothes. There were tears and rips and buttons popping loose. Feeling the Commander's hand slide under the open buttons of her shirt, Traynor's head began to explode. Oh God. She lay her head back, allowing Shepard to kiss eagerly along her neck as she desperately tried to bury away her troubles in another's arms.
"Oh..." Traynor groaned, dragging her fingers along the battle-scarred skin on Commander's bare back under her ripped tank-top, feeling the woman's assets threatening to spill out as they pressed down against hers.
Suddenly Shepard froze. She rested her head in Sam's cleavage for a second, then pulled back, hovering above Samantha in the semi-darkness, staring at her as though she was a stranger.
"Shepard?" Traynor breathed, reaching up to caress her cheek.
After several seconds of only heavy breathing, the Commander sighed and rolled away from her. She sat, hunched over the edge of the bed, leaning her arms on her legs. Concerned, Traynor moved closer, touching the woman's side.
"Are you ok?" she whispered.
"I...I can't," Shepard panted, holding her head in her hands, "Can't get it... out of my head... argh...Stop. STOP IT!"
"Hey!" Samantha soothed, kissing her shoulder, hearing how distraught she was. "It's alright, darling. It's alight. Come here. I've got you."
She pulled Shepard into a warm hug as the woman turned around wearily. Sam eased the Commander back down onto the bed and pulled the blankets over them both, resting Shepard's head on her chest like before and resuming combing her hair with her fingers. Trying to fight her own emotions, Samantha closed her eyes, holding the broken Commander in her arms tightly, hearing her continue to moan and mumble in her weakened, rawest state, before Shepard finally drifted off into another fitful slumber.
Four Days Later
"We have no more than 48 hours of shore leave. I want everyone back on the Normandy at 0600 hours prepared to leave, understood?"
"SIR!"
The entire Normandy crew set the time on their Omni-tools and saluted a bedraggled-looking Commander.
"Good. Vega I'll see you later for that drink. Behave yourselves everyone. Dismissed... Specialist Traynor, a word?"
The chatter started up at once as all of the crew took their much needed days off, leaving Samantha and Shepard alone in the CIC. The Commander stood on the ramp, overlooking the Galaxy map, leaning on it with her arms. Finally she turned around and descended, wearing a pleasant smile that detracted from her exhausted appearance. She placed a light kiss on Samantha's lips then took her hands.
"Dinner?"
Samantha giggled. "Don't you mean breakfast?" she teased, "It's 6am, Shep."
"Fine, breakfast then. God, you sure know how to turn your nose up at a free meal," Shepard joked.
Traynor poked her in the side.
"Hey! Watch it!" the Commander complained, rubbing her ribs. "There still a bit tender."
"Aw toughen up, darling. How do you expect to beat a Reaper with that attitude?"
"Oh, you are dead!"
Shepard bent over and scooped her up unexpectedly in a fireman's lift. Samantha yelped in surprise as she found herself face to face with the Commander's behind.
"AH! Put me down!" she laughed, squirming as Shepard walked with her towards the air lock, where the others had just left through. The Commander sniggered.
"What was that you were saying before?" she teased, swinging her in circles with ease. "Toughen up?"
"Yes, but not with me! I'm one of the geeks. Now you're just being a bully," Samantha chuckled, feeling the blood rush to her head as she saw the Normandy flash by, upside-down. Shepard laughed.
"Hey you're the one who told me I have an attitude problem!"
"Alright I take it back! I take it back! Now put me down before anyone sees me."
"Are you embarrassed to be seen with me, Samantha?" Shepard jested.
"For future reference, Ma'am, any time I enter an establishment with my ass in the air, you can be damned sure I'm going to be mortified no matter who is with me."
The Commander chuckled. "Alright, alright, I'll put you down...Just give me a second to process that mental image."
Samantha smacked her on the bum. "Down. Now!" she ordered.
Shepard laughed and bent over, placing Samantha back down on her feet again. As she straightened up, Sam caught her in a kiss with a soft moan of longing. She heard the Commander laugh quietly and slide her arms around her waist, pulling her closer.
"Mm you taste good," Shepard muttered, stealing another quick peck.
"I just brushed my teeth," Samantha replied with a grin, "Cision Pro Mach 4 baby!"
"What are you, advertising for them now or something?"
"No!" Traynor scoffed, "I just have a thing for expensive toothbrushes."
"Oh yeah?" Shepard laughed, "Well, I have a thing for you."
Samantha snorted. "Oh God that was such a bad line, sweetheart," she giggled, making tiny ringlets with the end of Shepard's hair, staring into her eyes.
"Sorry," the Commander sniggered, "You just bring out my cheesy side."
At this Traynor burst out laughing. "You don't have a cheesy side!"
"Hey!" Shepard retorted, making a mock offended expression, "I...could have a cheesy side."
"Hmm, that's true. But I'm more interested in your backside."
The Commander grinned proudly, backing Samantha against the wall, a hungry look in her eyes. "Now that was a good line, Specialist." She leaned in once more and kissed her deeply, pinning her against the wall in a very intimate manner.
"Heh-hem!"
The two of them broke apart. Dr Chakwas had just exited the Normandy behind them. She looked shocked, but rather unsurprised to find the two women kissing in the air lock tunnel.
"Commander," she greeted her, amused.
"What's up Doc?"
Samantha rolled her eyes. Does that joke ever get old?
"Your libido, apparently," the good Doctor replied with a slight smirk. "Funny...The tests I did on you while Liara was Melding had no results beyond the natural Melding process. I was beginning to get worried."
Shepard chuckled. "I'm fine, Doc. Maybe Liara just doesn't bring out that side of me anymore...No matter how much she wishes to."
Dr Chakwas grinned. "Perhaps you're right. In any case, I'd be careful if I were you. I'll see you two later. Specialist."
"Ma'am," Traynor greeted her.
They gave each other a courteous nod and a smile, before Chakwas disappeared down the tunnel and Sam pressed her face into Shepard's chest to hide her embarrassment.
"Oh, did that really happen?" she groaned.
"Hey, come on. It wasn't that bad," Shepard replied with a chuckle, as Sam straightened up again. "She obviously approves."
"I know but...Liara," Traynor sighed sadly.
"Liara had her chance," Shepard said softly, caressing Samantha's cheek. "She blew it...Well I blew it...Well, I got blown up...Spaced. I...It's complicated."
Sam giggled. "You don't say."
Shepard's green eyes peered into her brown ones, warm and inviting. "Samantha...You have nothing to worry about. Nothing at all. Trust me."
"I..." Samantha exhaled. "Trust is something that I have trouble with," she admitted, "After Elena..."
She felt Shepard's warm hand trace along her cheek and looked back up at her again.
"Trust me," Shepard repeated, her eyes burning brightly.
After a deep breath, Samantha finally nodded. Shepard kissed her once more then took her hand, and they both began the tunnel descent out of the Normandy and onto the Citadel, with the weight of the untold secret of Shepard's mother's message lying heavily on Traynor's heart.