Chapter 12: To Protect What is Most Dear
(Okay, just a warning, this left me in tears, so...bring tissues. My deepest thanks to Lokivsanubis and Firebirdever for reviewing! Your kind words are such a large source of motivation for me. Andnot to worry, another chapter of this...and a new chapter of The Soulflower are on the way!)
Tetsuya looked up from where he knelt, working alongside Sadao and several other relatives, laying the foundation for the family's new home, his eye catching the movement of a hell butterfly. He sat back, wiping the sweat from his face as the message was given in Mai's voice.
"Tetsuya, Aratani and I have been delayed in town and won't be able to get back in time to meet Kohana to bring her home from Aika's house. Would please be a dear and fetch her for me? In light of what happened, I don't feel comfortable with her walking home alone."
Sadao smiled.
"You had best go clean up and start walking," he suggested, "You remember the way, ne? Would you like me to go with you?"
Tetsuya brushed the hair out of his eyes and shook his head.
There is so much to do here. I will take care of this."
Sadao nodded.
"Thank you, segare. We do have a great deal of work to do to get this building up."
"Well, this should not take long, and then I will be back to help," Tetsuya promised.
"Just...do not overtax yourself, Tetsuya," his father warned him, "You know that the little one you carry could decide to arrive at any time."
"Yes," chuckled Tetsuya, rubbing his abdomen affectionately, "But we will try to wait a little longer."
He rose and left the worksite, walking to the large tent that the family had set up nearby and filling a washbasin. He bared himself to the waist and quickly washed away the soot, sweat and dirt that had collected on his skin. Then, he reached for a towel and saw something that had been placed next to it start to fall. He caught the item in his outstretched hand and realized it was a small picture in a simple black frame. His breath caught as he looked at the picture.
Is this...?
"Tetsuya?" Sadao's voice said softly, nearly startling him into dropping the picture.
His father moved closer, studying the picture in Tetsuya's hand, then looking quietly at his adoptive son's face.
"You...know about him...don't you?" Sadao asked, "Perhaps Byakuya-sama told you?"
Tetsuya nodded and handed the picture to his father.
"It seems that this, and several other pictures of him survived despite the flames," Sadao whispered.
"It is not my place to intrude," the youth said softly, "But...I noticed a reaction in you yesterday when Kohana spoke of wanting to enter the shinigami academy, and that made me wonder. Byakuya-sama only said what he needed to, to answer my questions. I would not have mentioned it. It is just...I happened to find this. I am sorry."
"Don't be," Sadao said, shaking his head and gazing down at Tamotsu's proud, smiling face, "As of late, I have been thinking...Mai and I have been thinking...that it was a mistake to pack away everything...to...make him disappear from our home upon his death. We do him honor by going to visit his grave, but...I feel as though we did wrong by seemingly erasing him. I know it has hurt Aratani to not be able to speak to us about him. And Kohana...Kohana would understand our feelings about her entering the military so much better if she knew."
Tetsuya smiled gently.
"Although, because she did not know, you may be certain that it was her own spirit that guided her into that decision."
"Yes," Sadao agreed, "She is a spirited child...and her powers are growing by leaps and bounds. She is lucky to have your guidance, Tetsuya. She looks up to you...I think, as she would have looked up to Tamotsu, had he lived."
"I am glad to be there for her. I want for her to grow up to be strong, so that she can defend herself."
"Yes...and I know that even so, you did not encourage her to join the Gotei 13."
"No," answered Tetsuya, "I had little motivation to do so, especially knowing that family rules bar me from entering the service, myself. And in any case, I prefer to directly defend the people closest to me. Someone must take responsibility for the direct protection of our homeland and family."
"You are right," Sadao agreed, "And it is a comfort to Mai and to me that you feel this way. As much as your entry...or Kohana's...into the military would make us terribly proud, we...have already suffered a horrid loss. And we hope never to feel that raking pain again."
"I understand," Tetsuya said, looking down into Tamotsu's lively green eyes that looked like his father's.
"I know you do," Sadao answered, setting the picture down.
He turned away, but paused for a moment.
"You favor him," he said softly, "except that your eyes are blue. You look as though you could have been brothers."
Tetsuya smiled sadly.
"And so you have made us, by welcoming me into the family. I am honored to be associated with him, even though I did not get to meet him. I feel his strong spirit still resonating in you and the rest of the family. But...if I may...?"
"Yes?" queried Sadao.
"I think that, when our home is rebuilt...we should let him have his rightful place...his picture included alongside ours. You do not have to do so, of course, if it pains you, but..."
Sadao turned back and wrapped his arms warmly around Tetsuya, and the youth could feel the shiver beneath his father's strong, calm surface. He returned his father's embrace and waited patiently.
Sadao closed his eyes and let out a long, shuddering sigh.
"You are right," he whispered, "It was not right to selfishly hide him away like that. And in truth, it did not even spare our feelings. It only added guilt, really. He was with us every day, even though there were no pictures. But we will do him honor now, as we should have before. Thank you, segare, for opening our eyes. You are a blessing, Tetsuya, truly."
He swallowed hard and stepped away.
"You have been the greatest of blessings to me as well," Tetsuya said softly, "And not just you. It seems that everyone I meet within our subfamily reflects the same unconditional acceptance. It sets our subfamily apart."
"Yes," said Sadao, turning back to him, "It does. And in some ways that is a good thing. But in some ways, it is a dangerous thing, segare. Nobles are generally not so tolerant of difference as we are. But you have experienced bigotry...class based hatred, and...you know the wickedness it spawns. You have tasted it with your own body. But somehow, even so, it has not poisoned you. So...when any of us are looked down on, when any of us are attacked because of what we think or the matters of blood, remember that it is an attack upon us all."
Tetsuya's eyes softened.
"Yes," said Sadao, "You understand me correctly. I am telling you that this attack on our family may have been directed at you, but it cut at all of our hearts. And we will stand together, Tetsuya. We will fight that kind of hatred together, because even if you left, that hatred would remain, and would only return later, in another form. Letting you go now would accomplish nothing but giving the ones who hate us their way."
He took a soft, steadying breath and nodded at Tetsuya.
"Go now. Do not keep your sister waiting."
Tetsuya nodded and quickly finished dressing, then took his leave of Sadao, leaving his father looking after him with more peaceful eyes. He returned to the building site and busied himself with work to pass the time. Several minutes later, Mai, Aratani and Kohana appeared on the road that led to the house, and called out a greeting. Sadao looked up at them, and left to join them in the shade of a large tree where several family members were serving tea and snacks to the workers.
"I thought that your hell butterfly said that you would not be back for a while. Tetsuya has already gone on to meet Kohana at Akiko's house."
"What?" Mai asked, frowning, "Hell butterfly? Sadao, Kohana came with us at the last moment. I did send a hell butterfly with that message, but not one asking Tetsuya to go and meet her."
Sadao's eyes darkened worriedly and Mai and Aratani exchanged concerned glances over Kohana's head, where she couldn't see.
"What is it? What's wrong?" the little girl asked.
"N-nothing, dear," Mai assured her, "Run along with your sister now and have your tea."
She waited until Aratani had led the younger girl away, then turned back to her husband.
"Do you think that...?"
"I don't know. But I am not going to wait around to find out."
"Sadao, do not go alone...please. It may not be just him doing this. You know that the investigation of the ruins of our house pointed to several perpetrators. He had help. And you know that there are others in the family that..."
"Yes," agreed Sadao, "I will go to Byakuya-sama. He is working at the sixth division and not far off the trail that Tetsuya will have taken."
Mai bit her lip softly.
"Perhaps you should go on ahead and I should get Byakuya-sama," she suggested.
Sadao nodded.
"That is best, I think. Go now. Quickly."
"You be careful," Mai warned him.
"I will," Sadao said, then flash stepped in the direction that Tetsuya had gone.
XXXXXXXXXX
Tetsuya walked at an easy pace along the quiet trail, enjoying the light breeze and the scent of pine and flowers that drifted in the air around him. He listened quietly to the sounds of nearby birds, and smiled at the feel of being in an open place, out where the sunshine and fresh air could reach him.
As much as the memory of Itamigiri is leaving me, I still remember what it was like to not have this. But rather than making me feel sad about the past, it makes me appreciate what I have now, all the more.
I have a family.
And despite the hatred that still pursues me, I am wanted, protected...loved by that family. I know that if my own parents were alive, they would be happy to know how this subfamily has embraced me as one of their own.
He was startled out of his thoughts by the appearance of a familiar leather hair decoration, accented with colored beads, that laid upon the ground. He bent and picked it up, noting that it had broken and several of the beads were missing.
I made this for...
"Kohana..." he whispered, staring at the hair decoration and remembering seeing the piece in her curly black hair.
He frowned and looked around, then spotted odd scuff marks on the ground and several more beads that had fallen off on the beginning of a smaller, almost hidden trail amongst the trees. Tetsuya bent and quickly collected the rest of the beads and placed them in his pocket, then retied the end of the leather decoration and attached it to the clip at the end of the braid on the left side of his hair. He studied the signs on the trail and saw footprints leading out into the trees. He moved into the trees, not walking on the trail itself, but alongside it, and watching carefully for any sign of movement around him.
A chill went through him as he realized that the sound of the birds had stopped.
Something is very wrong about this...
He continued to track the footsteps to where they led out of the trees and to a small, rocky ravine. he heard something rustle down below him and spotted what looked to be a child with black hair lying on the ground near a cluster of rocks. He recognized the clothing instantly as his sister's and flash stepped towards her, calling her name.
"Kohana!"
He reached the child and knelt next to her, calling his sister's name more softly as he turned her over. To his surprise, the person turned out to be nothing but bundled clothing and a wig. Tetsuya found a note attached to the bundle.
I told you to be careful.
He inhaled sharply and rose, trying to flash step away. But as he moved, a heavy blast somewhere above shook the ground beneath his feet, and he was forced to dive out of the way as debris from the explosion tumbled down into the ravine.
No!
Dust obscured everything so that he couldn't see, and he felt the hard impact of rocks striking the ones that he knelt among. Something crashed into the largest of the rocks that protected him, shattering it and forcing him to move. Then, a sea of dirt and rocks picked him up like a rag doll and tossed and turned him wildly. Something struck his head, leaving him unconscious and nearly covered in dirt, rocks and debris as the wreckage from the explosion triggered landslide came to a stop.
"TETSUYA!" screamed Byakuya's voice from the top of the ravine.
"There!" cried Sadao, pointing at where Tetsuya's partially buried form laid motionless in the dirt and rocks.
The two flash stepped down into the ravine, their hearts in their throats as they sought to reach the fallen youth's side. Byakuya fell onto his knees at Tetsuya's side, digging wildly and shaking like a leaf as Sadao gently pulled the unconscious youth free and lifted him into his arms.
"Is...is he...?" Byakuya panted, barely holding back tears.
"He is alive," Sadao confirmed, "But he is badly injured. We must take him to the clan healer at once!"
The two flash stepped out of the ravine and back along the trail, angling towards the small house where the clan healer lived with his wife.
"Michio!" Sadao said urgently, as the healer opened the door to them, "Tetsuya was injured in a landslide. Please you must help him! He is...supposed to have his baby at any time!"
"Yes," agreed the healer, "I have been in touch with Unohana taichou constantly to make sure things went well. Bring him in here. Noa, please go and fetch Unohana taichou. We may need her intervention."
"Of course," Michio's wife said, turning and flash stepping away.
Sadao laid Tetsuya down on the bed, and caught his breath as the youth made a deep, guttural sound of pain, and a thin line of blood leaked ominously from between his lips.
"Tetsuya!" Sadao whispered, his eyes widening in distress.
"Tetsuya, we are here," Byakuya added, slipping his hand into the other youth's.
He inhaled sharply at feeling through Tetsuya's skin that the youth's hand was badly broken.
"He has several serious injuries," said the healer, "and if we are to save him, I must deliver the child now! It will just take a moment to stabilize him."
Byakuya and Sadao watched breathlessly and Michio's power flowed into Tetsuya's broken body, calming the glazed-eyed youth and making his body relax. Tetsuya's blue eyes met Byakuya's and his shattered hand moved in the heir's.
"It's going to be all right," Byakuya assured him, "You and the baby are going to be all right."
"You and your baby are strong, segare," Sadao added, "Byakuya-sama is right. You are going to be fine. Close your eyes and try to rest now."
"N-no," whispered Tetsuya, "I...I w-want to...s-see."
Sadao and Byakuya exchanged glances, then Byakuya nodded.
"Very well," the heir said softly, "He is going to deliver the baby now. Be calm, watashi no koi."
Tetsuya caught his breath softly at the words, and Sadao's eyes moved from Tetsuya to the heir, then back again, but he said nothing.
Michio handed Byakuya a cool, wet washcloth, and the heir gently washed Tetsuya's face and throat as the healer leaned over the injured youth and focused his power into Tetsuya's swollen abdomen.
"You did a good job protecting your baby, even during this disaster," Michio said softly, "The reiatsu is strong. I am going to wrap my own around it, and then we will see it emerge."
The two youths and Sadao watched through widened eyes as Michio's power sank down into Tetsuya's body and captured the reiatsu inside him. Tetsuya went breathless as the golden reiatsu of his child emerged, then slowly resolved into a tiny body that moved and wiggled restlessly in Michio's arms. Tears filled Tetsuya's eyes as he met gentle brown eyes, a face that mingled his and Naoki's features beautifully and wavy black hair like his. The baby boy's tiny hands reached for him, and the newborn let out a hearty cry.
Tears filled Tetsuya's eyes as Michio quickly examined the baby, then set him in his father's arms. Tetsuya's eyes overflowed and the fingers of his broken hand touched the infant's face very lightly.
"He is...perfect, segare!" Sadao breathed almost voicelessly.
"He looks...like both of you," Byakuya said, barely restraiing his own tears, "You and Naoki!"
Tetsuya met their eyes with a tragically sad expression.
"Y-you know that he will n-never be safe here," he said softly, "As much as...it is ours to protect him, you know that Orochi and the others that are secretly helping him will not stop until they take him away from me. M-my place is here...and the battles I face for acceptance within the family are mine. But...I would have my son have a different life...to not be burdened from this first day by being tied to my fate."
He turned his head slightly to meet Michio's saddened eyes.
"You help families in the Rukongai...and I heard you say that there was a family who lost their baby son."
"Y-yes," the healer answered, "They have tried to have another child, but the first pregnancy left the woman barren. They have been seeking to adopt a child...to fill that space in their home."
"Then...let him go there," Tetsuya said, a sob escaping him as the baby's tiny hand captured a falling tear, "He will be loved...and...he will not have to live the life of a mixed blood child among the nobles. He will not be in danger from Orochi, and those others who would hurt him."
He looked up at Sadao, blinking away the tears and studying his father's face carefully.
"Maybe, you don't think that this is the right thing to do...but..."
"I understand, segare," Sadao whispered, "and I will respect your wishes, but...are you certain?"
Tetsuya took a shuddering breath and nodded. He smiled down at the newborn's sweet, contented face and kissed him on the forehead, nose and fingers, breathing in his scent and memorizing every little feature. Then, he handed the baby to Sadao and removed the leather decoration and beads from where he had attached them to the clip at the end of the braid in his hair.
"Let this go with him," Tetsuya whispered to the others, "Let it be a reminder, even though he will not know it, that he was loved by me...loved so much that...I had to let him go...s-so that the hatred that followed me would not touch him."
"Y-you will not go to see him?" asked Sadao, "You...?"
"It is too dangerous," Tetsuya whispered, "Orochi watches me. He knows when I am vulnerable. He would find a way to take Naoki from me again. I can never let that happen."
He met the healer's eyes pleadingly.
"You will...watch over him? Tell me...if he ever is in need?"
"Yes," said the healer, nodding, "Of course I will."
"Then, take him," Tetsuya said softly, "Take him now, before the burden of watching him leave become too great!"
"But...but you have only just..." Byakuya began.
"Take him now, please!" sobbed Tetsuya, "Please go!"
Michio looked as though he wanted to argue, but then nodded, and looked up as his wife entered the room.
"Unohana taichou is coming," he announced.
Then, she spotted the baby in Sadao's arms and smiled.
"Ah, the little one is born! And he is lovely! Congratulations Tetsuya-san!"
"Noa," Michio said quietly, taking the baby and setting him in his wife's arms, "Take the child to Isas and Ayumi."
"What?"
"Tell them...tell them that..."
Tetsuya bit his lip gently.
"Tell him that for the boy's safety, he must grow up away from the Seireitei. Be sure that...they know that...he is loved...and wanted, but that...it is for his safety that it must be this way. I will never seek to take him back from them...nor interfere with them, in any way. I only ask that when he is old enough, that they give him that one gift from me...and tell him that he had another parent who loved him too. Do not tell him who I am. Just...that I existed."
"I don't understand," said Noa, "Why are you doing this?"
Michio shook his head gently.
"You know why. We all know why."
"And it is Tetsuya's choice," said Sadao, "We must respect his wishes. He is only seeking to protect his son. If I had known before sending Tamotsu off to the Gotei 13 that...we would lose him, I think that I would have done anything to make him stay. As much as I want to tell Tetsuya that we will be able to protect this child, I do understand his desire for the boy to grow up more simply...without the burden of hatred following him. I don't know that I could be so strong as to let go as he is...but then I have always admired Tetsuya's strength and selflessness."
"And you are...sure that this is what you want?" Byakuya asked softly, "Are you sure Tetsuya?"
"Yes," whispered Tetsuya, "But please go quickly. My heart begins to break."
Noa nodded and kissed Tetsuya on the forehead, then allowed him to kiss the baby on the cheek and fingertips, and to whisper a last farewell.
"I love you, little one. And I am sure that you will be happy growing up...happier than I was. And you will be grateful for your adoptive family...just as I am grateful to mine."
"Will you name him?" asked Noa.
Tetsuya shook his head.
"I can't. Please go now...please!" he pleaded softly.
Noa exchanged glances with the others, then quietly left with the child. As the door closed behind them, Tetsuya dissolved into tears in Byakuya's arms.
"Come now, we must see to your healing," Michio said, gently extracting Tetsuya from the heir's reluctant arms and laying him down on the bed.
The door opened several minutes later, and Unohana taichou stepped into the room, followed by Mai, Aratani and Kohana. They paused, looking at Michio questioningly. The healer took a soft breath.
"I am sorry," he said solemnly, "Although I will be able to save Tetsuya-san, I was not able to save his child. The baby was...lost."