All things Twilight belong to the amazing Stephenie Meyer

C.12 Confessions and Bonfires

A frozen ocean joins our hearts
I can't wait to meet you when
The frozen waves meet ocean floors
You'll be standing on the shore
I can't wait to meet you then
Frozen Oceans - Shiny Toy Guns

Thanksgiving dinner had been exactly as I'd planned it. Jasper and I had silently ignored my small lapse of judgment and continued on as we had been. The only difference being, he hadn't touched me at all since. He hadn't even brushed past me accidentally.

I knew I was being overly sensitive about the whole thing, but I couldn't help thinking it over and over in my head. I was sure he'd liked me, certain that he felt something for me. Unfortunately, I must have been wrong. I was beginning to think I had misread the signs. Friendship was obviously the only thing he'd wanted.

Alice had noticed it as well. She'd looked past it on Sunday when Jacob, her boyfriend, was there. He was a tall Quileute boy from the reservation down on the coast. He was amazing, and more friendly than I could have imagined. Alice was besotted, and it was easy to see how much he loved her in return, he rarely took his eyes from her. All through dinner, the two of them talked quietly, and when they thought no one was looking, they'd steal a kiss or mouth I love you to one another.

Even with all of my observations while living on the street, I had never seen two people so drawn to one another. Maybe though, I had been looking for the bad rather than seeing the good. As good as that sounded as an excuse, that's all it was. I knew myself well enough to know my problem was exactly the opposite, I looked for the good in people.

I had made my decision to talk to Alice while I'd sat on the floor of the bathroom last Saturday night, and I knew I had to do it. I had to get it out of my system. She knew Jasper well, and had attempted several times during the week to question me about our strange behavior. Each time, I would just shrug it off. The conversation I had planned would take some time. I had so many questions.

Although Jasper was still keeping his distance when it came to touching me. I hadn't missed the looks he gave me. I would catch him watching me from the corner of my eye, and his smiles were still so warm but filled with an emotion I couldn't place. It was almost as though he was waiting for something.

Alice had invited us both to come to La Push with her, after I had accepted, Jasper had declined, explaining he had some things to take care of while I was gone. It was then that I realized I had consumed so much of his time. We were always together leaving him no room to do the things he would normally have done before I was dropped into his lap.

It was now Saturday morning, and I was stood outside with Jasper, waiting for Alice to show up. There was at least a foot of space between us. I felt awkward around him when he was like this. It wasn't as though I couldn't control myself, and I wished I could tell him that. I wished I could tell him that I could be just his friend. I just wasn't sure that was what he wanted.

We heard Alice before we saw her, the engine and music blaring from the Yukon could be heard through the trees before it rounded the last curve of the driveway. I looked at Jasper, all I wanted was to give him a hug and tell him to have a good day, but I was afraid that the awkwardness would reappear.

"Well, I guess I'll see you later."

"Yeah, just don't let them keep you out in the cold too long. There's supposed to be another cold front rolling through later."

"Thanks," I mumbled, what else was I supposed to say to that?

Alice hammered on the breaks making the car slide on the gravel in front of us, the sound of the music disappeared as she rolled down the window and leaned over the center console.

"You sure you're not up for a trip to the beach? It's Paul's birthday."

"I'm sure, I need to make a couple of calls."

Alice's perfect eyebrows arched as she assessed him. I couldn't read the emotion on her face, but it passed before I could really analyze it.

"Good luck with that!"

Jasper rolled his eyes and pulled open the door to the Yukon for me. I climbed in and pulled on my seat belt as he pushed it closed. A silent look passed between him and Alice before he slapped the side of the car and stepped away.

"Have fun, you're going to love first beach," he smiled, the usual warmth filling his features.

"Okay, you have a good afternoon."

Alice hit the gas before I was even able to finish my sentence, her hand on the window control winding it up so we wouldn't freeze on our way out there. I could hear the gravel kicking up from under her tires.

By the time we passed through the heavy gates she'd already begun eyeing me speculatively. I'd been too quiet.

"Spit it out," she said, her eyes flickering to me and back to the road.

"I did something last Saturday, something stupid . . . well not stupid, but I think I may have messed something up."

"That helped clear things up," she laughed, turning onto the highway that would take us straight into La Push.

"I kissed Jasper last Saturday, Alice."

The Yukon swerved on the icy road before swerving to the side of the road. The truck slid in the damp mud before coming to an abrupt stop and throwing me back in my seat. I had gripped onto the handle above the door, my knuckles white as I feared the worst.

"Alice!"

"Sorry, but you kissed him?"

I nodded, huddling a little in my seat. I couldn't distinguish the emotion in her voice so I figured it was better to be safe than sorry.

"Good for you, he wouldn't have made the first move, the big girl that he is."

"What?"

"Well, that's not fair, but I'm sure you gave him incentive."

"What are you talking about?"

Alice's face took on a blank mask for a brief second before she spoke again. She'd thoroughly confused me. I couldn't figure out what she meant by incentive. Incentive to what?

"Well, I'm guessing he kissed you back?"

"Yes, but things have been weird between us since," I mumbled, looking down at my hands as they twisted around one another. "He won't come within four feet of me."

"Are you serious?"

I nodded, I could feel the tears building in my throat as I thought back on the past week. I'd been so strong in front of Jasper, I'd kept ever ounce of anxiety and rejection bottled up inside until I was alone. That was when I would break down, let the tears flow silently.

Speaking to Alice had almost the same effect as being alone. I knew that she would listen to what I had to say, and I knew the emotions would pour from me, yet being here, in the car with her, I realized that crying would give too much away. Crying would let her see how deep I was.

"What a dick! I should call him up and . . ."

"No!" I shouted over her, panic making me react. I didn't want him to know, I didn't want him to think that it had occupied every one of my thoughts this past week. Even if it had. I just wanted things back the way they were.

"Well, honestly, I think he wants to give you time. Maybe he felt like he'd pushed you into it."

"No I don't thinks so, we were messing around, he was tickling me. I got free and ran, hit my leg, like only I'm capable of, then I hopped to the bed. He came to check on me, and I rolled to look up at him, he was looking at me like . . . well . . ."

"I'll eat you alive?" she laughed.

I felt the blush rise in my cheeks and my head dip. Hearing her saying it out loud made so much sense. It was the only way I could describe the way he looked at me. It was a hunger.

"It's completely normal, Bella," Alice laughed, rubbing my arm. "Men are easy to read if you know what you're looking for."

"I don't though, Alice. I've never been on a date before. The guys at my high school were too scared of Dad and uncle Bri; and there weren't too many opportunities on the streets."

"You have me, you can ask me anything you want to," she smiled, turning back in her seat to put the truck back into drive. She pulled away from the side of the road, but continued to keep an eye on me through her peripheral vision.

"So, what happened after the look?"

"I grabbed him and kissed him. It took him a second, but he seemed to kiss me back, then he pulled away and started to apologize. I stopped him, but I . . . well, I ran into the bathroom and cried."

"Bella, why didn't you talk to me sooner?"

"I didn't want to chance him overhearing something. I would be horrified."

"Why, it's your honest feelings, there's really nothing to be embarrassed about. I do understand though, and I'm glad you decided to talk to me."

"Thanks, Alice."

She'd helped more than she'd known, and she'd given me a lot to think about. Had I been the one to give off mixed signals? I had been sure Jasper liked me before last weekend, and if what Alice has said was indeed true, then I hadn't been wrong. Had I been the one to look as though I regretted kissing him?

I couldn't remember feeling that way, or even expressing it, but there was a chance my confusion could be misconstrued. The fact was, I was happy. Knowing what I knew now meant that if I decided to bridge that gap and speak to him, rejection shouldn't be my biggest fear.

At least, I hoped it wouldn't be.

Jasper was on my thoughts for the rest of the drive. I hadn't even realized that Alice had turned up the radio and was singing along casually with the song that was playing. I was lost in my own head, going over and over the ways I wanted to speak to Jasper, what I wanted to say to him. How I wanted to apologize if I had indeed been the one giving off mixed signals.

More than anything though, I was lost in the imagery of kissing him again. Feeling his full satin lips against my own as his body pressed against mine. The way his fingers brushed across my skin. The heat, the emotion, all of it. I wanted it more than ever now.

"Bella," Alice said, snapping me out of my thoughts. I would have blushed, but the ocean sprawled out ahead of me had me distracted. It was beautiful, the half sandy, half rocky beach rolled into the black pacific, the waves lapped against the shore threatening to take more as it pulled the stones on its way out.

On the beach, there was a large fire, uneven root and rocks sticking up in all directions. There was a group of the kids from the reservation hanging around and I assumed that they must be Jacob's friends.

"Wow, this is amazing."

"Isn't it. I love first beach, even when it's cold like this. There's something about those dark angry waves that fascinates me."

"It's beautiful."

"That too," she laughed, pulling out her keys and sticking them in the visor.

I could see Jacob's tall form in the distance, loping casually towards us from the beach. He was unmistakable really, his height and build guaranteed he'd be seen from a distance. Though I had noticed that a lot of the other kids seemed to have the same height advantage as Jacob.

Alice had noticed him as well, she hopped out of the car quickly, slamming the door closed behind her as she took off towards Jacob. I got out of the car and followed behind, giggling to myself as I watched Alice spring into his arms. Jacob caught her easily, his arms winding around her and holding her to him as though she would disappear if he didn't.

I looked down at my feet when they started kissing. It was a private moment between them, and having known Alice for a while now, I knew that she hated not having much time with him. She was open about her love with Jacob. He meant so much to her, even though her parents had forbidden her to see him.

"Pick those feet up, Bella, we're missing all the fun," Alice called. I looked up in time to see Jacob put her on her feet and give me a broad smile. He was always so friendly, I couldn't imagine anyone not liking him.

While I took my time getting to them, I really looked around for the first time. I noticed the small houses dotted along the coast line bleeding back into the small village beyond that. All of the houses were small, and I was beginning to understand more of the analogies Alice used for their relationship. This wasn't a rich town by any means, each one of the houses could probably fit into Jasper's house fifteen times or more, and from what he and Alice had told me, her house was even bigger still.

I liked it. It differed from every living situation I had been in, but the only word that came to mind when I looked at the small houses was quaint. They had an appeal that made me feel comfortable, made me feel as though I fit. It was no wonder Alice enjoyed spending time here when she could.

We all walked the rest of the way to the group talking quietly amongst ourselves. Jacob was full of information about the reservation. He could point out places I wouldn't have known existed if he hadn't of made them obvious. He was proud of his heritage and it showed when he spoke of it.

As we neared the big group, their faces became more defined, and I could see the animated way in which they spoke with one another. It had been such a long time since I'd been around a group of people my age this size, I was beginning to get a little nervous. It wasn't that I felt threatened, each of them had smiles on their faces as they spoke to one another. I simply felt like an intruder in their world. It was obvious they were all friends and had known one another possibly since birth.

"It's okay, Bella. They're all excited to meet you," Alice laughed, having obviously felt the hesitation in my now rigid arm.

I looked at her then back to the group a little hesitant. They'd all known I was coming, Alice had told me that when she'd invited me. It only now occurred to me that I hadn't known what she'd told them about me.

"Alice, how much do they know?"

Alice looked to Jacob and back to me in one twist of her neck. I had a feeling she would have told Jacob everything, it came with them being in a close relationship. I didn't mind that anyone knew my past, I was just concerned at being pitied. I didn't want them to base their opinions on the hardships I'd been through.

"They think that you're visiting from out of town. They know you're nothing like the stuffy brats that go to Forks high, but that's about the crux of it," Jacob said with a smile. "You met Alice in camp when you were kids. They shouldn't ask you too many questions, I told them to leave you alone."

"Leave who alone?" a boy asked as he approached.

"Bella, you jackass," Jacob rolled his eyes, but his smile was playful.

"Oh, so this is, Bella. Good to meet you, I'm Seth Clearwater."

I smiled at the boy, he was definitely younger than Jacob, but his smile was just as warm. He was tall too and I was beginning to wonder what they were feeding the kids around here.

"Good to meet you, Seth," I grinned back, feeling immediately at ease in his company. He assessed me with his eyes as though he were waiting for something to happen. I couldn't help but grin even wider when his pout came on fully and his bottom lip jutted out a little.

"You seem too relaxed," he said, he almost sounded disappointed as he looked at Alice. She rolled her eyes and looked at me. My confusion was obviously evident.

"You know I told them I was bringing you down here when I was here a couple days ago. They all seemed excited to meet another one of my friends. I think they're secretly hoping to freak you out like they did with Rosalie."

"Come on, Ali, that's not fair. Rosalie was just as uncomfortable as we were. She wouldn't even sit down on the couch," Jacob laughed, shaking his head.

"Her parents are the biggest snobs I know, it was bound to rub off on her. At least she tried."

"I don't think Leah would see things that way," Seth interjected, dancing around so he was walking beside me. "She still calls her the snobby bitch from Forks."

"Leah's just pissed off because of Rosalie's reaction to the clothes she offered her. If Paul hadn't of knocked her into the rock pool it never would have happened," Alice sighed.

"She is a snob though, babe."

"Yes, I would agree with that, but do you remember when you first brought me here?"

Jacob rolled his eyes and danced out of Alice's path before she could hit him with her free hand. He chuckled happily as he circled around and came up behind her, pulling her up into his arms. She screamed loudly as he sprinted towards the water with her.

"JACOB BLACK, PUT ME DOWN!"

"Bad move," Seth laughed.

I turned to look at him.

"He will put her down, but he'll put her down . . ."

The blood curdling scream pulled my eyes back to the water where Alice was stood knee high in the - what I could only presume was - freezing water. Seth didn't need to finish his statement, it was obvious what he was going to say.

Alice took off down the beach chasing Jacob, who was laughing almost too hard to make any real effort at escaping. I couldn't help smiling while I watched them, Alice's face lost anger and frustration with every duck and weave they made, by the time they ended up back at us she was laughing just as hard as Jacob was and gasping for breath.

"Laugh it up, smartass. You're running back to the car and getting me dry pants from the trunk."

Jacob rolled his eyes, but gave her a fleeting kiss on the lips and a slap on her butt before jogging back the way we came.

"Come on, I'll introduce you to everyone," Alice smiled, wrapping her arm in mine again and heading towards the larger group who were now watching us with obvious amusement.

Seth trotted ahead of us as we approached the group, he slipped through the center and pulled up a long stick, looking disappointed when there was nothing on the end of it. He looked around the group and focused on another tall boy.

"Paul, did you eat my hot dog?"

"Yeah, I did. It's my birthday, Clearwater."

"Thanks man, now I have to wait for the dog to cook again."

"Well, you should'nt have been so damn nosy."

Seth shook his head in disappointment and headed to a small polystyrene cooler that sat at the end of one of the branches. Paul's eyes turned to us.

"You must be, Bella. Alice talks about you a lot," he laughed, pushing one of the other boys beside him before stepping forward. "Why don't you come meet everyone."

He offered me his hand, and I took it. My skeptism was being overridden by their warm welcome.

He went around the group slowly, introducing me to everyone. I only remembered a couple names because he was moving so fast as he went around the circle. I hoped they wouldn't be offended if I didn't remember their names.

We spent the entire night talking casually with one another. Some of them asked me questions and I answered as best I could, but more often than not, Alice had to jump in and help me with this new background. It wasn't like I minded. It was very much like listening to someone tell a story.

We ate hot dogs cooked on the fire, played football in the sandy parts of the beaches. Then the group of Quileutes started telling old legends. I hadn't realized how long we'd been there until the darkness began to cast deeper shadows over us all. The group started dividing up into couples and the glow of the fire gave each of us a warm orange tint.

I was sat next to Alice, Seth on my other side blocking out the wind. Things had grown quiet around the small circle and I found my mind wandering back to Jasper. I wondered what he was doing at that particular moment. I found I was missing him now that the near silence gave me time to think.

The roll of the waves across the shore was hypnotic in the silence, and I let my head rest against Seth's shoulder as he talked with his sister, Leah.

"Hey, Jake," Alice asked, her voice was barely above a whisper but in the silence of the group, it carried easily.

"Yeah?"

"Will you come with me to pick up Edward next week? They're flying in Christmas eve."

"Sure, do you think he'll be okay with that?"

"Yeah, I think he's done some growing up since leaving."

There was a snort at the other end of the circle. I wasn't sure who it was, even with my eyes scanning the darkness.

"Like that douche could ever change," I heard Paul's voice rise above the rest and assumed he'd been the one to snort as well. He didn't seem like the type to bottle his emotions.

"Can it, Paul," Jacob growled beside Alice.

"What? It's not like you haven't thought it."

"Paul, quit being an asshole," Leah interjected. "It may be your birthday, but I'm not above kicking your ass."

"What? All of a sudden everyone can forgive the guy because he's been gone for almost a year?"

"No, Paul, you insensitive bastard. It's because he's Alice's brother, and Alice may as well be one of us."

Alice shifted uncomfortably in her seat and looked at me with a cautious smile.

"Have you ever met the dick?" Paul asked me, looking between Alice and I.

I shook my head. I didn't want to offend Alice, but I was beginning to get intrigued by the way Paul was describing Alice's brother.

"Paul, that's enough."

"Jasper doesn't even like the guy."

"I thought Jasper and Edward didn't get along because of the boxing thing?" I questioned, looking to Alice for confirmation.

Alice's audible sigh seemed to stop the conversation from going any further. Although I was now highly curious, I really didn't want to push her into talking about something she wasn't comfortable talking about.

"Oh there was some boxing involved," Paul murmured under his breath.

There was silence once again surrounding the circle, only the waves lapping at the shore seemed to really stop the complete stillness of the moment. No one seemed to move from where they were sat and I had a feeling everyone knew how Alice felt about this specific topic.

"You okay, Alice?" I asked quietly.

"Yeah, just not my favorite subject, but these bone heads just love to tell the story."

"You have to admit, it was a pretty fucking great moment," Paul laughed. "He had it coming to him."

"Fine!" Alice sighed in resignation. "But this time I tell the story. Bella doesn't know my brother, or my parents."

Paul nodded, and leaned back against the log behind him. The glow of the fire strong on his features in the fast fading light.

"My parents come from old money, they're good people, but they're all about social circles and getting ahead in life. They don't like mingling with people they think are below them. Even the Whitlock's had trouble getting into the social circle of the Forks upper crust. My friendship with Jasper was questioned until Charlotte started donating to my mothers charity.
"My brother, Edward, thinks along the same lines as they do, at least he did until he went away to college."

"Bullshit," Paul interjected.

"Paul," Jacob's tone was full of an unspoken warning, but Paul shrugged it off and motioned for Alice to continue.

"I'd been seeing Jake for about three months when Edward found out about him. He told my parents and they forbid me from coming down here to see him, in fact, they forbid me to see him at all.
"Jasper was the only person I could talk to about it, he encouraged me to go after what I wanted and offered to be the fall back, so for a while, people believed I was dating Jasper. In reality, he was bringing me down to La Push to see Jacob."

No wonder they were so close. Jasper truly was one of a kind, and no one could deny just how much of a good guy he really was. He saw what made Alice happy and made sure that she followed her own dreams before letting her family get in the way. It also answered a lot of questions I had about Alice, why she was so sweet considering her background.

"Edward found out and followed us down here. He got out of the car and started screaming at me. He called me irresponsible, stupid, he really laid into me. I felt terrible, I had always looked up to Edward, but seeing this side of him really made me see him, and I realized that he was just like them. It wasn't the best moment of my life, realizing my brother was cruel snob."

Alice looked down at her hands and then up at Jacob, their eyes meeting. Something passed between them silently before Alice continued.

"Jasper decided to stay that particular day, I don't remember why, but we were all right here on first beach. Sam was still here, it was before he left for college. I think it may have been his going away party."

"No," Leah said with a faint smile on her lips. "It was his acceptance, he'd just received his letter saying he'd been offered a full scholarship to UW."

"That's right, because Edward had just has his acceptance letter to NYU."

A small murmur of voice passed around the group. The recollection seemed to have brought up memories for some of them. I watched as they quietly talked about Sam and his acceptance. Leah seemed the most nostalgic of the group.

It took a little while to calm down before Alice continued.

"Edward was in my face, screaming at me, calling me stupid and irresponsible, saying I was going below my station and slumming it. Jasper stepped in between us and told him to back off. The two of them threw words back and forth. Each was more hurtful than the last. Then Edward called Jasper white trash."

I bit my lips, trying to stop myself from saying something cruel about Alice's brother. If she said he'd changed, I believed her, people tended to say things in the heat of the moment just to get under the others skin. I'd seen a lot of it. Watching people sometimes gave you the advantage when it came to situations like this.

"Jasper got angry and basically told Edward to go fuck himself, told him to get the stick out of his ass. Edward pushed him in the heat of the moment. Both of them were too angry, I could see it coming but there was no way to stop it. Jasper threw two punches, one to Edward's stomach and the other to his face. He broke Edward's nose. Edward never told my parents who'd done it, but things still aren't good between Edward and Jasper."

"They also spent a fortune straightening his nose." Jacob mumbled from the other side of Alice. She elbowed him playfully. If it hadn't have been for the fire, I wouldn't have even seen the slight.

"You should have seen it, Bella," Paul laughed standing up, he looked around the circle until his eyes landed on Seth who was still sat on my other side. "Seth, come be Edward."

"No," Seth shook his head, but Paul gave him a look of finality making him clamber to his feet, mumbling under his breath.

"Push me," Paul demanded.

Seth rolled his eyes, but pushed Paul regardless. Paul threw punch in Seth's stomach and then aimed for his face, but Seth ducked and threw his shoulder into Paul's stomach. The two started wrestling roughly, sand and stones flew in every direction, making those around the circle move from the path of destruction.

"On that note," Alice laughed, standing up.

"You have to go so soon?" Jacob asked, his eyes sad and his lips pouty.

"I do, but I promise to make an effort to come back tomorrow." Alice said, moving between his legs and cupping his face with her tiny hands. "and don't forget you're coming to the airport with me next week to pick up Edward, Emmett and Rosalie."

Jacob groaned, but Alice just kissed the tip of his nose affectionately. Jacob's arms closed around her thighs pulling her into the circle of his arms.

A collective groan moved through the group as Alice bent in for a kiss, Jacob threw the rest of the circle his middle finger as his arms moved up her small body. I averted my eyes, watching the last of the match between Seth and Paul dying out as they both rolled onto their backs in the sand laughing.

I was thinking about the story Alice had told. Jasper had explained his past to me, and even with that knowledge, it surprised me he would lose his temper so thoroughly. He was always so gentle and kind to the people he interacted with, seeing him angry wasn't something I could fathom at all.

Even so, I knew he did it to defend his best friend. He saw her being verbally attacked and stepped in. If this Edward chose to pick a fight, then I could see that being a different story altogether. Yet, I couldn't fault Edward either. Even though he was being unnecessarily cruel, he was protecting his sister the only way he knew how.

I couldn't take sides on this fact, it had happened so long ago, I had never met Edward, and Alice truly believed he'd changed. If she could see past what happened, I had to. I couldn't judge someone on something they'd done in the past. It would make me the biggest hypocrite around.

"Bye guys," Alice said, alerting me to the fact that her moment was over.

The collective group said their goodbyes, and Alice and I headed up off of the beach.

We were just reaching the truck when we heard footsteps behind us, we both turned around and saw Jacob loping towards us with a smile on his face. He walked us the rest of the way to Alice's Yukon.

I gave him a hug and jumped into the truck and out from the biting wind rolling on off of the coast. I hadn't realized how cold it was. The fire had been more effective than I'd realized.

There was only a dull orange glow being cast from the lone light in the lot, but it was enough to see the scene in front of me. I felt like I was intruding again, but I couldn't look away. I'd never seen anything like it in my life.

Jacob's huge hands had Alice's face cupped in them, her head was tilted back as he leaned forward. They were quietly talking amongst themselves, but the love radiated from them like heat from a fire. When ever Alice would talk, Jacob would push the hair back from her face so he could see her eyes. Alice had her hands resting against his forearms as she looked at him in a way I couldn't even begin to describe.

Their love was evident, it was strong and bold. No one could have missed the looks that passed between them, but in a moment like this, when they thought they didn't have an audience, it was even more resplendent.

Jacob lowered his head until his lips brushed against Alice's in a featherlight touch. I looked down at my hands, trying not to watch them as they shared another private moment.

Alice climbed in a while later, a small sigh falling from her as she started the engine and unrolled the window.

"Call me later?"

"Of course, I love you, Jake."

"I love you too, baby. Come see me soon."

"I will, bye."

"Bye."

Alice put the car in reverse and pulled out of the parking spot slowly. She finally spoke when we pulled out onto the highway.

"I hate saying goodbye to him."

I smiled, I really didn't know what to say to her, I'd never been in that situation. I could only imagine how hard it would be to sneak away to see the one person in the world you wanted to spend all your time with. I tried putting myself in that situation in my head.

"I can understand that. Will it be harder when your brother comes home from college?"

"No," Alice sighed again. I think it was the most I'd ever heard her do so. She was normally so happy. "They don't know Edward now. That was over a year ago, almost two. Edward's been through a lot in college. He's done a lot of growing up. We talk a lot and he's happy for me, he realizes that it's not just a phase, like my parents liked to use as an excuse. He really isn't that person anymore, I hate that they tell that story."

"So, Edward's supportive?"

"He is now. He just wants me to be happy."

"That's good. People do change, it's just a shame that he can't show them that."

"Well, he wants to invite Jake to hang out with us one night. I don't know if it's a good idea, but if he's willing to try, I have to give him the benefit of the doubt."

"If you don't try, you'll never know."

"That's true," she smiled.

The car fell into a comfortable silence as we both withdrew into our thoughts. For the umpteenth time tonight, I let my mind wonder to it's constant preoccupation, Jasper. Now, as I sat in the dark silence of the car, with the new information, and after witnessing what Alice had with Jacob, I let myself think about him. I let myself think about the possibility of an us.

A/N: I hope that answers why Edward and Jasper have bad blood between them. Eventually it will be an outtake, along with how Alice and Jacob came to be together, and maybe Rosalie's trip to La Push. I know it may seem like a bit of a filler chapter, but I needed to explain why Edward and Jasper don't really like one another all that much. Christmas is only a week away after all . . .

As always I would like to thank my triplets for the support they give me. This is actually the second version of this chapter, but they made me wait to make sure it's what I wanted to do before they set me loose. So thank you miztrezboo (Author of the amazing Voice inside my Head/The appointment and other awesome stories) And thank you bemylullaby (Author of For Better For Worse, Unintended and other amazing stories), for holding my hand. Especially when I'm being a PP. Also, Miztrezboo has an entry in the tattward/Inkella contest (Underground) and bemylullaby and I have a collaboration piece entered also (Nunquam Vultus Tergum).

Thank you also to M., who has finally caught up and also adheres to my Neurotic tendencies.

Thank you for all the alerts and faves, and thank you to the reviewers who all rock hardcore. You are all amazing and each and every one of you inspire me. As always the review replies will have a sneak peek of the next chapter. The blog and forum will also 2 different sneak peeks, links on my profile.

Wow I had a lot to say, thank you all so much. Much love ~Weezy